To Find a God

by Mary Hamilton

  “She doesn’t. Every time I saw her, she smelled really good, like jasmine, lilac, and lemon. And she is so beautiful. Not like that ugly thing up there.” She stopped short, remembering that she was supposed to be quiet and listen.

  His smile exuded warmth. “Perhaps I will be fortunate enough to see what you have seen. But, for tonight, we must return to the problem.” He clasped his hands between his knees as he spoke. “I have questions, questions I am sure that you cannot answer, but crucial ones nonetheless. First, how did that thing get into our kingdom? From what we saw, I can only assume that it possesses some magical power, not unlike that of our goddess. But more importantly, how did she know about you? And the attacks on the dark elves? And our prisoners? And even my consideration of leniency for them. How did that thing come by this information?”

  Marzi had not considered that. She just assumed that gods, good and bad, could know anything they wanted. “There’s something else that seems strange to me. Why would this thing want you to kill the humans? I would think that it is actually the one who sent them.”

  Just at that moment, Valyn entered her thoughts. These are the right questions, Marzi.

  “Too many questions, too few answers.” Elondiel continued, “But there is an old maxim, I have no idea where it originated. But it says:

  When problems present as complicated beyond all understanding, one might best solve them by discarding the complexity and considering the simplest of solutions.

  “Put another way, we might say that the simplest answer is sometimes the right one. We could assume that you have made yourself out to be a child, learned to speak and act like one, to appear as lost and lonely for your family. And we might assume that you somehow have the ability to direct humans, a race of which you are not a part. We might think that you were able to completely deceive all of the elves with whom you have been in contact. Now I know first-hand that Rintaur is no fool, so deceiving him would have been hard. And Ariessa, never. While I don’t know Saige personally, what I have heard is that she trusts no one. And finally, we might assume that, in your spare time here, you communicated among the humans and that this being somehow saw all of this. This seems overly complex to me.”

  He scratched his chin as he appeared to think through the problem. “On the other hand, there could be a much simpler explanation.”

  Chapter 79: Marzi

  The two guards marched Marzi into the hall, where Elondiel and his group of frost elves sat on one side of the table. Rintaur and the other dark elves sat opposite them. The Azyrean so wanted to go sit beside her friends. But the guards motioned her toward a seat at the far end of the long table.

  Elondiel rose from his seat and, with hands on the table, began what seemed a painful recitation. “It has been a long, very dark night for me. The matters unveiled yesterday have weighed heavily upon me. I have gone over everything I can recall, and I have taken counsel with my advisors.” He faced the dark elves across the table. “Lord Rintaur, I now offer you the opportunity to speak for the dark elves of the Bough. After that, Saryn will be allowed to address the concerns of the dark elves of the cliffs.” He nodded. “Lord Rintaur.”

  The lord consort stood and faced Marzi for a long moment, his eyes red and swollen. “I can only repeat what I said yesterday. Marzi has shown herself to be a loyal friend to the elves, even at the risk of her own life. And yesterday, she displayed for all of us what she is made of. She willingly gave herself up for imprisonment and death to avoid further conflict among the elves. That is hardly the behavior of one bent on our destruction. And I count her among my dearest friends, as do my companions. I envy you not in your dilemma, Lord Elondiel, but I place myself and my fellow dark elves squarely on Marzi’s side. I ask humbly that you think this through carefully before deciding on an irreversible course of action.”

  “Thank you, Lord Rintaur. Saryn of the cliff elves, have you anything to add?”

  Saryn, the son of Saige, stood and cleared his throat. “Yes, Lord Elondiel. We at the cliffs have the unfortunate reputation of trusting few others. And when Marzi, this outsider from another world appeared, we viewed her with heightened suspicion. Having seen her in action, I can say without qualification that she is exactly what she purports to be. She is a child who has been thrust into an adult role. Moreover, she has performed in that role as well or better than any adult that I know could. As Lord Rintaur recounted, she saved the life of Ryshara at great risk to her own. She has willingly ventured into the wilds with us, again at great personal cost, simply because she was called to help us, the elves of Menalor, come together. On the other hand, I have a difficult time accepting that the thing we say yesterday was Valyn. It defies everything that we are taught about our goddess. I humbly ask that you consider the entirety of the evidence and I believe that you will find as we already know. Marzi Gloam of Pangrove is our friend.”

  Marzi fought back the tears. No matter what else happened to her, she knew she would never get over hearing the words of her friends. No one had ever spoken of her like that. A smile found its way onto her lips despite the dampness of her eyes.

  Elondiel directed his attention to Marzi. “I will not ask you to speak. You and I conversed last evening, and I believe we said all that there is to say. I will, therefore, offer my conclusions to the assembly here.”

  He moved out from his chair and paced back and forth behind his contingent as he spoke. “No one wants to believe the worst. Despite our suspicious and closed nature, each of us is designed to believe in good, to believe the best of people. In my many years of rule and my time of growth before that, I have been witness to the honor and the goodness of the frost elves. Through stories and my own relationship with my cousin, Lord Rintaur, I know the dark elves, both of the cliff and the Bough, to be of the same character. We view the world in different ways, but we are, in our hearts, all the same elven people.” He paused, allowing his gaze to pass from face to face across the table.

  “I have only just met Marzi Gloam of Pangrove. I know a few things about her. I know that she likes the oat and nut cakes sweetened with the syrup of the mabon tree. I know that she fiercely misses her family. I know that for one so young and new to this world, she demonstrates strong ties of friendship and loyalty. For her to be what we were told she was yesterday, for that to be true, requires a rather extraordinary leap of imagination, one that I find myself quite unable to make.”

  Gasps emerged from several members of the frost elf contingent and then they fell silent for a moment. Marzi could see, though, that if Elondiel proceeded as he appeared to be going, there would be a full-on battle in the room. His daughter, Corhymin stiffened, her face tightening and her mouth pulling into a tight line. She stared straight ahead.

  Brysten seemed mildly annoyed but kept all emotion from her face. In fact, of everyone at the table, she alone seemed completely objective. “Lord Elondiel, I share your reluctance to leap to unwarranted conclusions. The things you say would, on the surface, seem to be true. But we must also consider that Valyn told us otherwise. While it is good and honorable to consider the input of our elven cousins, we should be wary of discounting the word of our god out of hand.” She twisted her head to look at the leader of the frost elves as she finished.

  “Well said, Brysten, well said. It does indeed create a conundrum. And it seems that, as we try to unravel it, the puzzle gets more and more complicated. None of the pieces fit perfectly. We are called to force them into place or to discard certain pieces in favor of trying to make an acceptable overall picture. But last night, Marzi helped me to understand something. There are times when simplicity is the correct approach. Sometimes the simplest, most logical answer is the correct one. When I asked Marzi what made her think that what we saw was not Valyn, her answer was surprisingly simple and true, from the heart. The smell was wrong.”

  “What? The smell?” Brysten stood and turned to face Elondiel straight on. “That makes no sense at all. How would any of us know what Valyn
smells like?”

  “Indeed, how would we? And yet Marzi told me what it was like when she met Valyn in the Ruins of Koror. I believe that it was, what, jasmine, lilac, and lemon, is that correct, Marzi?”

  The Azyrean nodded.

  “Yes, and what we smelled yesterday was burnt sulfur. So, I ask you, all of you. Which seems more likely. A goddess of nature that imbues us with harmony and balance, smelling of flowers or one that smells of something rotten? Marzi maintains that what we saw was not Valyn. I have never been fortunate enough to see our goddess before, but I have to admit that the being that visited us last evening looked nothing like what I would have imagined. And that is all before we even consider the message of death and retribution that we received. No, I am struggling to accept that our goddess paid us a visit.”

  Brysten moved deftly to the side, near the door. At the same time, Lar’donal twisted in his chair, his face intense. “Then who or what did we see?”

  Marzi stood. “What came here yesterday was a corrupted god named Dredwyn. It is known back in Caravast, the land of the humans, as King Wyndred.”

  Another gasp, this time from the entire room. Everyone looked shocked except Elondiel, who smiled and nodded at her. “And so, we are faced with some hard questions. How did this thing know everything that it knew? How did it find access to our kingdom? I pondered these questions all night. And as the darkness turned to gray this morning, I came to a reluctant and yet inescapable conclusion. It had help from one among us. And by that, I mean one of the frost elves. Of course, it took me another couple of hours to narrow down the identity of the traitor. But I come to you this morning ready to act on that. My first inclination was to have the person arrested immediately, taken to a cell, and prepared for execution. But my more humane side resisted that.” He turned toward the door, facing Brysten. “I will give you the opportunity to redeem your soul. Own your responsibility and take the honorable path to the next life. And may Valyn accept your repentance.”

  Brysten stared for a moment before her skin darkened to a sickly shade of green. Her face distorted as her ears shortened and her hair disappeared. “You truly believe this will make a difference. Our lord Dredwyn will rule all of Kronos and spread our word throughout the universe. I reject Valyn and all she and the other impotent gods stand for. My lord will carry my spirit to all of the worlds that he will rule for eternity.” And with that, her body disappeared into a cloud of smoke.

  Everyone around the room, on both sides of the table, stared in stunned silence. Even Marzi, with whom Elondiel had taken counsel most of the night, sat in shock. Finally, Andu’lar broke the trance as he reached up and scratched his head. “That was quite unexpected.”

  With the tension released, laughter erupted. As Marzi stood, Elle bolted from her chair and covered the distance to the Azyrean in just a few steps. Hurling herself, she embraced Marzi and squeezed. “I am so sorry, Marzi. I am sorry that I said bad things about you. I’m sorry I didn’t apologize before. And I never meant it about leaving you in the forest.” She hugged tighter.

  Marzi felt the tears on the side of her face. She put her arms around Elle’s neck, as best she could, considering the size difference, and there the two stood, rocking back and forth.

  Rintaur met his cousin by the door, and the two of them inspected the spot where Brysten had disappeared. “How did you know it was her?”

  “Process of elimination. All of the possible others have strong opinions. They push their views and never let up. Brysten was different. She knew how to nudge gently, and then back off, letting me think that I was pursuing my own ideas. If I stalled, she would give me a gentle push. She, among all of the others, knew how to manipulate. And, if one is to be a successful traitor and spy, that is something they must master.”

  The lord consort smiled. “I guess this is why you are the leader of the frost elves.”

  Elondiel turned to his contingent. “There will be time for discussion and reflection later. For now, we make preparations to march to the Bough. We have an alliance to form.”

  Chapter 80: Marzi

  Despite trying to pull together her thoughts on the way back to the Bough, Marzi found herself unprepared for the arrival. She had been sent out to enlist the frost elves and that effort had been successful. But the journey had also been intended to accompany Ryshara, Ellemareth, and Ran to their place of banishment. But here, it would seem that the Azyrean had once again chosen her own path rather than doing what she had been instructed to do. Her three friends, along with Lord Rintaur, who had also been banished, were all returning with her. This was not likely to please the empress. Accompanying them as well were Elondiel, his daughter Corhymin, and a dozen of their finest bowmen and fighters.

  On the last day of travel, as her trepidation built, Marzi noticed that they were being watched. It came as no surprise. By this time, she understood that the elven people guarded their enclaves with fervor. No one or thing came or went without their notice. She wondered about Pangrove—whether the adults there ever worried about such things. But who would ever invade Pangrove?

  The closer they got to the Bough, the more apparent the surveillance, the less care the dark elves seemed to take in stealth. Until finally, they broke into the clearing beneath the canopy and were met by Ariessa, the council, and what seemed most of the Bough population.

  “We welcome you, Lord Elondiel and companions.” The empress nodded her head in respect as the travelers approached.

  “Thank you, Empress. I bring the greetings and goodwill of the frost elves of the Quel’dethain Mountains.” He bowed.

  “I see among you members of the Bough along with our friend, Marzi Gloam of Pangrove.”

  What struck Marzi was that there was no welcome attached to that recognition. She had spoken at length with the leader of the frost elves as well as with her friends about this homecoming. She was grateful when Elondiel took the issue head-on.

  “Yes.” He held his hands out, palms up as he spoke. “I assure you, Empress Ariessa, it is not my intent nor the intent of my people to interfere in the matters of the Bough. Having Lord Rintaur, Ran, Ryshara, and Ellemareth accompany us was my idea, and I beg you indulge my explanation before judging them.”

  “Please, speak freely.”

  “Dark times are upon us, as you well know. In my estimation, exigent circumstances dictated that we will need the best our people have to offer. In the discussions to follow, you will hear about the actions and behaviors of these dark elves while visiting our realm. But in the interest of brevity, I will tell you that they acquitted themselves proudly. They stood shoulder-to-shoulder with our people when the false god, Dredwyn, appeared. They comported themselves honorably and with respect as the frost elves attempted to sort out and make sense of the events. I feel strongly that, if we are to prevail and secure the peace for elven generations to come, we will need them. I ask humbly that you consider these arguments as you decide on a course of action.”

  The discussion paused as the empress appeared to consider both the frost elf’s words and the assembled party. When she spoke, the corners of her mouth turned up ever so slightly in a betrayed smile. “I am pleased to hear your words. I appreciate that these are difficult days without precedence in our time. I assure you that our consideration,” she paused and nodded at the council members who stood by her side, “will take all of this into account.” The hint of a smile disappeared. “For now, let us welcome you into our homes. You are no doubt weary from the journey. Food, drink, and rest will make our discussions more productive. And we have guest quarters prepared below—our people will show you.”

  ◆◆◆

  The dreaded summons to a private meeting with the Empress had come. Marzi knocked on the door to the large council meeting room and, upon hearing the requisite invitation, she entered. Ariessa sat in her usual place, but without the council members flanking her. Across the table, Marzi’s seat had the usual box in place to allow her to see over the table. “You
called for me?”

  “Yes, please, be seated, Marzi.” The empress poured talonberry nectar into a small cup and carried it around the table. She then chose the seat nearest to Marzi and sat down. “The encounter this afternoon, in the clearing below, you do understand that this was a ritual of sorts, do you not? The words on both sides are carefully chosen and protocol is strictly observed. This allows us to rekindle our relationship with the frost elves with some degree of predictability. Misunderstandings can ruin the best of intentions.”

  Marzi hadn’t really considered that, but it made sense. She sipped the nectar and nodded without speaking. She had grown more accustomed to listening carefully. It helped that Valyn had made that point repeatedly—talk less, listen more.

  Ariessa smiled, this time with little apparent effort to hide it. “It is time, perhaps, for us to have a discussion that does not involve this kind of formatted ritual. We have come to the point where we need to talk about things real. The first thing that I want to tell you is that, by whatever methods you used, bringing your three friends and Lord Rintaur back to the Bough, you did exactly as you should have. In fact, I never intended anything different. Please understand, I could not just tell you this. They were under dictates of banishment. I had not the authority, formal or informal, to encourage violation of this. I did what I could to point you in that direction. I am grateful for your quick understanding and actions. You did exactly the right thing.”

  But somehow Marzi already knew this, although she didn’t understand how she knew. As she thought back to those days when they approached the Stormhill Crossroads, she recalled knowing even then that the purpose of going north was to remain with her friends and to connect with Rintaur. Valyn had implied as much but did not specifically tell her.