by Kristy Marie
This book marks every year that you’ve put up with my shit.
Every year when I was an asshole—which was a lot.
Every year when you made me laugh, and every year I held back tears because you needed me to be strong.
Yes, this book is about me.
I’m joking.
This book is to remind you of how truly wonderful you are. How truly amazing you really are.
You don’t give yourself enough credit, babe.
But I see the change.
Every day, I see you blossom into the woman your mother and grandparents would be proud of.
You are my biggest inspiration.
You are Katniss fucking Everdeen.
May you always remember what you mean to me.
Happy birthday, my love.
Theo
I cried for hours looking at those pictures. There wasn’t enough concealer in the drug store to cover up those bags. He made me a memory book. On those pages were pictures from when we were fourteen until just recently. He wants me to remember him when he leaves.
Somewhere between running alone and finding his exam on the counter made me realize something.
We failed.
Not in the sense of an exam but in our friendship. I failed him. He’s always been there for me, and no matter what happened last night, I let him down. Sure, he acted like a royal asshole, but I knew when I saw the coffee splattered in the sink this morning, he was sorry.
I don’t understand why we do this to each other. Why do we bury these feelings until they overflow and we can’t stop the explosion that spills out? I knew leaving with Rhys would piss Theo off, and if I’m being completely honest, I wanted to make him mad. He pissed me off too.
But being petty should not have been the answer. I opened a portal I knew he would jump through. He thinks I don’t see him giving his teammates a death glare every time they look in my direction, but I do. I see him. And after our night together, I thought things would change between us. But they didn’t. Everything went back to the way they were.
I was angry.
I was hurt.
I was heartbroken.
I was a fool.
All Theo and I have ever been is friends. I let my head poke through the clouds and try to ruin the friendship we had built over time. He’s not my boyfriend. I have no right to make him jealous. Okay, so I do a little. I’m the one who has dealt with his shit every day for the past eight years. Yes, me. Not Kim from the softball team or Rachael from Sigma Kappa Blah-Blah. It’s been me. All me. Von Bremen, whether he wants to admit or not, is mine. He was eight years ago, and he is now. Kim and Rachael are only distractions from the truth. He’s mine. He knows it. I know it. And I’m tired of this back and forth.
Thinking of the man purposely ignoring me on the sofa, I toss off my shirt, change into my sports bra and one of his old jerseys, and slide on some leggings. I know what we need, and right now, we need what brought us together in the first place.
Baseball.
In the hallway, I grab his bat bag and pull on his hat. I look the part, and when I drop the bag at my feet in the living room, his head snaps up, his eyes roaming all over my body. I see the need in his eyes.
“Get your shit, Von Bremen.”
He doesn’t say anything to my demand, but he quirks a brow and tamps down the almost smile he nearly lets loose.
What did I tell you? We need this.
“What if I’m not in the mood?” he taunts.
“What if I hit you with this bat for getting on my nerves more than necessary today?”
A slow smile tugs at the corner of his full, pouty lips, and it shoots straight to my heart, making me feel shittier for not talking to him this morning. We could have saved ourselves a shit-ton of stress today. But then I would have missed this smile, so I’m thinking it was worth it in some ways.
“You have two minutes to change before I leave without you.”
He acts casual as he pulls himself off the sofa like he doesn’t give a shit if I leave him or not. His cut forearms flex when he slides them into the front pocket of his jeans before stepping toe to toe with me.
“Do I have any clothes left to change into?” he murmurs with a victorious gleam in his eye.
I scoff. “Don’t flatter yourself. All of my clothes are dirty.” I roll my eyes to hide my true feelings—I love wearing his clothes. I love his last name hanging on my back. Silly, I know, but it’s how I feel.
He hums and grins, brushing past me. “I smell bullshit.”
“You’re about to smell bullshit when I put my foot up your ass. Hurry up, Von Bremen, before I lose my patience.”
For God’s sake, get away from me before I hug you and tell you I’m sorry for not running with you this morning.
Finally, he retreats to his room to change, and I’m able to settle down my hormones. Seriously, why am I so emotional today? Theo and I fight all the time. We’re two alphas; we always butt heads.
You know why, screams the stupid part of my brain.
It’s because he’s about to leave me… and maybe because I love him more than a friend.
Before I can fully analyze my emotions, Theo barrels down the hall, scooping up his bat bag from the floor, and heads to the door, throwing over his shoulder, “Come on, McCallister, let’s get to this.”
And just like that, we are back to our old selves.
“Out!”
I give the two freshmen an apologetic smile as they gather their gear quickly and exit the batting cages like their asses are on fire.
“You didn’t have to make them leave,” I argue with the idiot who is filling two pitching machines with quarters. He stops cold and whips around to face me.
“Yes, I did.” He flashes me an ugly look that makes me want to throw a ball at his pretty face. “I don’t need any witnesses for what I’m about to say to you, McCallister.”
So it’s like that, is it?
He has something to say, huh? Well, so do I.
I snatch a bat from his bag and forego a helmet. Shit is about to get real out here.
“All right, Von Bremen, let’s settle this.” I shove him out of my cage and hook the latch. For a moment, we just stare at one another, separated by only chain-linked fencing. His blue eyes are fierce, like he can’t decide if he wants to shake me or hug me. He settles for a growl and a bat, taking his spot a few seconds later in the batter’s box.
“Get ready.” He nods at the machine in warning.
I roll my eyes, squaring my shoulders and adjusting my stance. Before the first ball is launched out of the machine, I briefly wonder what speed setting he put my pitches on.
When the first ball zings past my face, I jump back. Obviously, he set my pitches just as fast as his. But whereas I missed the first pitch, Theo doesn’t. The crack of his bat echoes in the open air.
“You’re an asshole,” I say aloud, readying for the next pitch and missing it.
“This should not be a surprise to you.”
The sound of wood making contact with the ball and his smart-ass tone causes me to grind my teeth together.
“Yes, Theo, I know you have asshole tendencies. However, you were especially cruel last night. You had no right to talk to me that way. I’m not your personal property.”
Another ball smashes into the fence, but he doesn’t answer, which only makes me want to argue with him more.
Forget hitting the ball, I turn to his side of the fence and smash my bat against it. He doesn’t even flinch.
“Theo!”
A fastball whizzes past him, and he misses for the first time. In hindsight, I should have seen his reaction coming, but when he slams his bat against the fence, his chest heaving with every drag of air, I realize I flipped his figurative switch.
His fingers curl around the chain, and he all but growls, “Rhys was going to fuck you on the community mattress in that shithole of a house he lives in. Is that what you wanted, Anniston? To wallow around in
all the fluids of the women before you? Is that what you fucking wanted?”
His voice raises, and he slams the bat against the fence again, causing me to flinch.
“I can handle myself,” I say calmly. Theo needs to chill the fuck out; his face is red, and he looks like he could destroy property with the bat in his hand.
An evil laugh filters through the humid air, clinging to the back of my neck.
“Is that right?” he sneers, unlatching the gate and barging his way in. His cheek twitches with barely controlled rage, and I take an instinctive step back. “Tell me, Anniston,” he mocks, crowding me against the fence, the fastballs whizzing past his head like small rockets. “Tell me what you would have done if Rhys had you in this position.”
Before I can even digest his words, Theo shoves me against the fence, his hips pinning me to the harsh metal. He drops the bat, grabbing my hip with one hand and my jaw with the other.
“Fight me, Anniston. Show me how you would have fought him off.”
A stupid noise escapes me. Damn him.
Damn.
Him.
I try shoving him away, but he’s too strong and I get zero traction.
“Fine!” I scream at the stupid smirk on his face, but he doesn’t let me go. “I knew you would come after me,” I admit, hitting him in the shoulder. I hate that he makes me crazy. I hate I care if he goes out with other girls. I hate I love him and I’m not sure he feels the same.
Tears well in the corner of my eyes, but I don’t let them fall. Not even when he frowns.
“You wanted me to come after you?”
I nod.
It’s the truth. I wanted to hurt him like he hurt me, but now I just admitted I was a jealous roomie, my heart sinks to my toes. What am I doing? Am I really about to tell Theo I was jealous that he was with Vanessa?
“I, uh… I was—” Madly in love with you. “—hormonal. And tired.” I pat him on the chest and force him to the side, so he doesn’t step back into the pitches. “I’m sorry. I knew Rhys was a dickbag. I think I was just hurt. It wasn’t how I wanted to spend my birthday. I’m sorry for worrying you.”
Smooth, Anniston, real smooth.
Theo looks stunned, scratching his chin and running a frustrated hand through his hair.
“How did you want to spend your birthday?”
I shrug. “I wanted to go watch the Braves one last time with you.” I shrug again. “I guess it doesn’t matter now.” Squatting, I pick up his bat and tip my chin at the ball machine. “You want to hit some more?”
He shakes his head, a frown firmly planted on his face.
“I’m sorry. I should have run with you this morning,” I add. The bat hangs heavy in my hands, and the guilt over his test hits me. “I should have studied with you and reminded you to take your medicine this morning.”
The bat eases from my hand before it’s replaced by his warmth.
“Look at me,” he demands.
It’s hard because the tears really want to fall, but I hold firm and keep them sealed up where they belong and lift my head to meet the concerned depths of his royal blues.
“I’m sorry for being an asshole and making you feel like a little girl unable to fend for yourself. I was so worried about you, and the thought of Rhys—”
His mouth is like a semitruck barreling down the freeway when it crashes into mine. This kiss isn’t soft. It’s angry and brutal. Our teeth clash and our tongues fight for the upper hand. And then it’s over as quickly as it began.
Damn you, Von Bremen.
He steps back, his lips wet with the evidence that we, in fact, just kissed. And by the way his jaw is working, he wants to do it again.
And again.
Until we’re writhing and naked beneath each other.
Okay, I don’t know that. I’m just assuming he feels the same as me right now—a whole lot of horny.
Patience, Anniston.
“Did you really think I would let Rhys fuck me?” I ask, hoping to change the subject and calm us down.
Really. Rhys has fucked everything with a heartbeat, and even that may be a stretch. Some of the girls tearing out of the frat house look like they might burst into flames under the sunlight.
Theo sighs, fidgeting with the woven bracelet on his wrist.
“I promised Hines I would always look out for you.”
Do not make a noise, even if you want to slap him and run to the car and leave his considerate ass. Is that really why he came after me? Because he promised my grandfather to always look out for me? He didn’t come because he hated to see me with another man?
Sighing, I plaster a fake smile on my face and tap his shoulder.
“He would be very proud of you.”
It’s true. Theo was the grandson Hines always wanted. It’s just…. It doesn’t matter. Theo will never admit he loves me, and maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I misread this whole situation. Maybe he really is a great friend, and in a couple of days, I’ll lose him either way.
So really, if I think about it, telling Theo how I really feel wouldn’t be so terrible, would it?
Of course it would. How many movies have we seen where best friends ruin their relationship by bumping uglies? Yet…
“Hines would have beaten your ass, and mine, if he knew what we’ve done these past four years of school,” he muses, a small chuckle rumbling in his chest.
I shrug. Technically, I haven’t done near the amount of sinning Theo has.
“I feel like he would beat your ass the most,” I say, smiling before adding, “I merely flirted with sin. You unzipped your pants, jerked off on it, and then flipped it off while you fingered its sister.”
His face scrunches up like he tasted something nasty. “That is the dumbest metaphor I have ever heard.”
“Don’t care. It’s the truth.”
One hundred percent the truth. Theo has always been the bad boy with the gooey center.
“Whatever,” he says unaffected. “I’m sorry anyway. I shouldn’t have said those things to you. I was an asshole. Forgive me?”
Of course I forgive him. It isn’t the first time he’s said something mean, but he’s holding back what he truly wants to say.
I think.
“Of course.” I extend my hand, and he swats it away with a glare.
“You’re lying,” he accuses flatly. An exasperated noise escapes me, but he cuts it off. “I know you, Anniston McCallister. Better than you know yourself.”
He’s really reaching now.
If he really knew me, then he would know I do forgive him. That’s not the issue here. The issue is, he’s a little liar. Theo Von Bremen did not yank me from Rhys for my grandfather.
He did it for selfish reasons.
Reasons, I plan on using to get what I want.
“I’m not lying. I said I forgive you, and to prove it, you can buy dinner tonight.”
He eyes me suspiciously but starts bagging up our gear.
I watch him watching me. He knows I’m up to something.
And he would be correct.
It’s time I find out just how shallow you have to play in the friend zone to make it around all the bases to score.
Two salads and two showers later, Theo and I are back in our routine of lounging on the sofa watching game footage. I spent the whole car ride debating on the right time to ask him my favor.
I decide that there was no time like the present.
I need him to know I don’t want to be friends anymore. It’s as simple as that.
“Theo,” I say, pausing the game.
He turns, catching my gaze.
“Hmm?”
You can do this, Anniston. Just tell him.
“I’m a virgin.”
There. See? Nothing to it.
Except, Theo makes a strangled sound.
“Okay,” he drawls, his face looking pink tinged. “Why are you telling me this?”
That is the question, isn’t it?
“Because I
want you to take my virginity.”
Does Theo take Anniston up on her offer?
Read the conclusion to their epic story here.
Like all of my books, it’s free in Kindle Unlimited.
Love Pitcher? Want to read more from this series? All books are standalones and are free in Kindle Unlimited.
Commander
Gorgeous
Drifter
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Thank you for picking up this book and taking a chance on my words. I realize your time is precious. It’s my mission to always give you a memorable story worth those precious hours of alone time. So, thank you for spending your evenings, mornings, or lunch hour with my characters. You, the reader, are what keeps stories alive.
It’s never without sacrifice to write a book. Namely, your own sanity. But when you’re surrounded by the best readers and friends a girl could ask for, that loss of sanity turns into a full blown orgy of craziness in the best way. In no particular order, these are the crazies that held me together for this wild ride.
My street team. You ladies are the definition of dedication. Your post and excitement bring tears to my eyes. You keep me going.
Jessica, I kinda run out of things to say to you. So I’ll make this one short and let Theo tell you how we feel—because I’m weird and you’ll laugh. “No takebacks. You’ll always be our girl.”
Jaime, did we just become best friends? Gah! I sure hope so. Otherwise all my texts seem a bit stalkery. Thank you for not blocking me and reading this book about nine billion times in between talking baseball shit with me. You know it turns me on.
