And at those words, for the first time since this ordeal began, I feel a surge of true joy. My babies are coming. Before the night is over, I’ll hold them in my arms.
I can’t wait.
Chapter 23
I’d expected to writhe and sweat and push for hours into the night, but the birth happens remarkably quickly. Filippa and Giovanna can’t stop exclaiming about how brief my labor was, how lucky I am. I’m sure they’re right, but I can’t give any attention to that because I have two beautiful babies in my arms.
I’m sitting upright, propped against Alex, exhausted but elated. My daughter is asleep, nestled into the crook of my right arm. My son is awake and alert, waving a tiny fist in the air as if demanding to be noticed.
“I see you,” I whisper. “I see you, sweetheart.”
Alex kisses my cheek, my temple, the spot behind my ear, and tells me what a wonderful job I did and how much he loves me.
I can’t look away from my children’s faces. They are so beautiful. They’re the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.
I almost don’t notice when Alex steps away from me to speak to his mother. A moment later she’s shooing the rest of the family out of the room, quietly but insistently pressing Enzo and Donato out the door. They both look over their shoulders for one last glimpse of the babies before they go. I can’t say I blame them.
Alex comes over and sits beside me. “I thought it would be nice if we had some time alone. Just the four of us.”
“Thank you.” I rest my head on his shoulder.
“Are you doing all right?” he asks.
“I think so. I feel fine.”
“That could just be adrenaline, though,” he says. “I’m going to have the doctors look you over when they arrive.”
“Whatever you want.” I’d agree to anything right now. I’ve never been in this good a mood in all my life. “Look at them. Who do you think they look like? Me or you?”
He smiles softly. “All babies kind of look the same, in my opinion. I imagine we’ll see the distinguishing features more as they get older.”
As they get older.
Of course, I’ve thought of my children at various ages, but this is the first time it’s occurred to me since they were born. They’re going to grow up. The tiny people in my arms are going to be three-year-olds, and five-year-olds, and twelve-year-olds, and adults. They’re going to have lives full of love and adventure. What a strange, amazing idea. I look down at my baby girl and try to imagine what her future holds, but the possibilities are too vast. I’m so lucky I get to go on the journey with them, to see what they become.
“So,” Alex says, “a boy and a girl.”
“Vito and Marianna?”
“If you like it?”
“I do,” I say. “They’re beautiful names.”
He beams at me. “Thank you. It means a lot to me. And I had a thought.”
“What’s that?”
“Well, even though we agreed on Avaranian names because of their royal status, it doesn’t seem fair not to have your family and culture represented. I wondered if you had some family names you’d like to give them as middle names.”
“I can’t believe I didn’t think of that,” I say. “That’s a great idea, Alex. Thank you.”
He reaches over and lifts the boy out of my arms, allowing me to cradle our daughter closer.
“So what names will you give them?”
“My own grandparents, I think,” I say. “That makes sense. My mother’s parents as well.”
“Don’t keep me in suspense.”
“Marianna Lynn,” I say, kissing her gently on the forehead, “and “Vito Paul.”
“Marianna Lynn and Vito Paul Gosar. Heirs to the throne of Avaran.”
There’s a knock at the door.
“The doctors are here, Alessandro,” his mother calls.
Alex hops to his feet and shows the doctors into the room. I’m reluctant to part with my babies long enough to be checked over, but I allow it so everyone’s mind will be put at ease, and soon enough the doctors declare that I’m doing fine. My primary concern is for the babies, but they both receive clean bills of health too. The doctors are polite, discreet, and gone as readily as they arrived.
As the doctors depart, the rest of the family sidles back into the room. Alex notices them lurking and rolls his eyes.
“Come in, then,” he says, waving them forward. “Don’t just stand there. The doctors say everyone is healthy. Come meet the children.”
They file back into the room and find seats. I feel strange lying on the floor in the middle of the circle of people in formal wear. The doctors gave me a gown to put on, thankfully, so my ruined dress is gone and I’m comfortable, but I can’t help noticing that everyone around me is still in their evening gowns and tuxedos.
Alex’s family, however, only has eyes for our babies. The doctors have wrapped the twins in blankets like little burritos and put hats on their heads, and they’re both fast asleep now. Alex hands Vito to his father, and I reluctantly pass Marianna to Filippa.
“She looks just like you,” Alex’s mother says. “Those eyes, and that little chin dimple. She’ll be a beauty.”
“Let me see.” Her husband looks over her shoulder. “Oh, she’s pure Alessandro, you’re right about that. She’s got my father’s genes!”
“I think he looks more like his mother,” Filippa says, looking from Vito to me. “Do you see it? The face shape?”
“Not to mention his eyes,” Enzo says. “They’re so light, look. Just like Erica’s.”
I lean back, resting my head on Alex’s shoulder, and close my eyes. I’m overcome with exhaustion, suddenly, and very aware that I’m sitting on the floor. I want to let myself drift off to sleep, but I know this is not the place to do it.
“We should get back to the palace,” Alex murmurs, his hand grazing up and down my arm.
“You’re not going back tonight,” Enzo objects.
“Of course not,” Giovanna agrees. “Do you think we’d have you just get in your car and drive home? Do you even have car seats for those babies?”
I have to admit we don’t. It’s not something I thought about. I was supposed to deliver at home, and I saw no reason why the babies would need to leave the palace for a good long time. We’d need car seats eventually, but not right away.
“We’ll send someone out to buy some,” Giovanna says. “But all of you will stay here tonight. You’ll be our guests. We insist. Alessandro, you and Erica can take the blue room on the ground floor, will that be all right? Erica probably shouldn’t be taking the stairs right now. And we still have the bassinets from when our children were born. We’ll bring them in for you to use.”
“Thank you,” Alex says. “That’s very gracious.”
“You’re family,” Enzo says gruffly. “Of course we want to do our part.”
Alex helps me to my feet, then sweeps me into his arms. I don’t need his help to walk, but I appreciate his touch, anchoring me and making me feel safe.
He shoulders open a door at the end of a long hall. The room is painted pale grey, with navy window hangings and bedspread.
“The blue room,” he announces, depositing me gently on the bed.”
“Mmm.”
It’s nice, but I’m almost too tired to think. I settle into the soft mattress, the warm blankets, and let the obviously expensive pillows cradle my head as I sink down, down into sleep.
Before I know it, I’m waking up with a start. I have no idea how long I’ve been asleep.
“Where are the babies?” I ask, panic in my voice.
“They’re right here,” Alex says.
He pulls a pair of bassinets up alongside the bed so I can look down into them. Both children are fast asleep now.
“I can’t believe they’re really here,” I say quietly watching them sleep. “I feel like we’ve been waiting forever for them.”
Alex slides up onto the bed behind me and wraps a
n arm around me. My body feels different, strange, now that the babies are out and on their own, but his touch is soothing and familiar.
“I feel just the opposite,” he admits. “I feel like I just learned I was going to be a father yesterday, and now they’re already here. This has happened so fast.”
I close my eyes and let myself drift for a minute, half awake, listening to the precious sounds my children make in their sleep, enjoying the feel of Alex’s hand on my hip. I feel myself trying to sink deeper into sleep, but I hold on. I need to watch the babies. I need to make sure they’re okay, now that I’m no longer holding them safe inside me.
A loud pop explodes through the silence, jerking me fully alert. I bolt up in Alex’s arms, but he catches me and eases me back down.
“Easy,” he says quietly. “It’s all right. Sounds like they’ve opened a bottle of champagne.”
I feel a warm glow in my chest start to spread. “They’re celebrating?”
“Apparently.”
“That’s good,” I say. “That means they’re happy.”
“Of course they’re happy,” Alex says, leaning over me and planting a line of slow kisses along my jaw. “Our babies are here, and they’re strong and healthy. How could anyone not be happy?”
“But what about the bad blood between your father and your uncle?” I ask.
“Mmm. Maybe they’re getting past it.”
“You think?”
“Well, it was never exactly like they hated each other,” Alex says. “They’ve always been civil, and there was no open animosity. Things were just…tense. But this has given them something they can both celebrate. New heirs. A future for Gosars on the throne. That’s exciting. It’s the kind of thing that would mean a lot to both of them.”
He gives me a little squeeze. “I think we might be looking at a new chapter in relationships among the royal family. I think this is probably going to bring everyone closer.”
“That would be great,” I say.
“That would be amazing. And all because of you, Erica.”
“All because of them,” I correct, reaching down over the side of the bed to touch Vito’s tiny face. “I didn’t do anything.”
“Of course you did,” he counters. “You brought them into the world, didn’t you? You carried them. You gave birth. Not to mention moving here to Avaran, leaving behind everything you know to be a part of this world. Enzo won’t say it, but I know he’s impressed.”
“You think so?”
“You heard how he talked about his own son, Lauro. About his family in America. It means something to him to see our family continuing on Avaranian soil, even aside from the throne. It’s tradition for Gosars to live here, to be raised here, surrounded by our culture. You’ve made him very happy.”
“I’m glad,” I say. “But I doubt anyone’s as happy as I am.”
“I don’t know about that,” Alex says. “I could give you a run for your money.”
“Can you believe we have two children?” I say. I watch, entranced, as Marianna yawns in her sleep. It’s the most perfect little yawn I’ve ever seen. “I know this is insane, but there’s a part of me that wants to wake them up right now. Spend time with them.”
Alex laughs. “Don’t do that. We’ll have plenty of time to bond with them. We should consider ourselves lucky they’re sleeping right now.”
He reaches over me and rocks Vito’s bassinet gently back and forth. “They’re such good babies. My mother says I never slept at night when I was a newborn. Apparently, I kept her up every night for months. She was exhausted, she says. She likes to tell me that when she thinks I’m being ungrateful.”
“Didn’t she have…I don’t know, a nurse for you or something?” I ask. “I’ve been here long enough to see how things are done. There are members of staff for every need you could possibly have at the palace.”
“I had a nurse,” Alex says. “But my mother preferred to care for me herself. But don’t worry, we’ll be able to hire as many nurses as we want. We won’t have to lose sleep like that.”
“No,” I say, surprised to hear the vehemence in my own tone.
“No?”
“I mean, we can hire help. That’s probably a good idea. It’s not like I’ve ever raised a baby before. But I can’t stand the idea that they might be up in the middle of the night crying and the person who goes to them wouldn’t be me. Or you. It should be a parent, not someone we’ve hired. They aren’t a job.”
He kisses my shoulder. “Have I told you lately how much I love you?”
“It’s come up,” I say, and turn my head to meet his kiss.
We lie there for a time, entranced by the beauty of our children. I feel secure in Alex’s embrace, as though nothing can go wrong. The world seems a much more benign place than I’d ever realized. How is it possible that everything has gone so well, that with everything that could have gotten in our way, Alex and I are able to be here with our two healthy and perfect babies?
“This is better than I ever imagined,” I say softly. “You get to keep the throne. Your father and your uncle are on good terms. And Vito and Marianna…” My voice trails away. I can’t put my love for them into words. “I couldn’t ask for anything more,” I say finally.
Alex is silent, his hand tracing slow patterns up and down my arm.
“Alex?” I crane my neck around to look at him.
“Yes?”
“Is everything all right?” I feel a sudden pinprick of unease. “You’re being awfully quiet.”
“Everything’s fine,” he says.
“Just fine?” I know I’m being neurotic—hasn’t he already said how happy he is?—but everything is just so wonderful that it’s hard to take at face value. My life has generally been pleasant, even a bit charmed, but it’s never been perfect.
He kisses my shoulder again. “It’s just that you said you couldn’t ask for anything more,” he says quietly. “I wondered if that was true.”
What could that mean?
“I can’t think what else there is,” I say honestly. “I suppose I wish my parents were here. They’ll be sorry they missed the birth. But they have plane tickets to come out in two weeks anyway, so we’ll see them then.”
“Yes,” Alex agrees. “We will. And I know they’ll be as pleased to meet their new grandchildren as my own parents were. You must be excited about that.”
“Of course.”
“But that isn’t what I meant,” he continues.
Confused, I roll over in his arms so I’m facing him. “I don’t understand.”
He inhales deeply and closes his eyes. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you, Erica.”
“What is it?”
“Everything we’ve done together,” he says, “our whole relationship, we’ve done backwards. Our first date was a whirlwind, barely a date at all. We were expecting children before we exchanged phone numbers. Everything we’ve done has been out of order, without a plan or any kind of organization. But I’ve felt that it’s all been for the best. Don’t you think so?”
“Yes,” I agree. “We’ve been very lucky. If this had happened with anyone else, I probably would have regretted it, but with you…it’s like it was meant to be. It’s like the children came to let us know we were meant to be a family.”
“Well, that’s what I think too,” Alex says. “And that’s why I think…” He cradles my face in his hands. “Erica, will you marry me?”
I’m struck dumb.
He misinterprets my silence. “We don’t have to,” he says, and I can see the disappointment registering on his face. He’s trying to hide it. It’s heartbreaking. “I know it’s not something we planned on. I just thought, since none of this is what we planned…and I can’t imagine being with anyone else…I love you. You know how much I love you. But I understand if you don’t want—”
“Alex,” I interrupt, finding my voice. “Stop. Stop talking.”
He stops.
“Of cou
rse, I’ll marry you,” I whisper.
There’s an instant that seems to last a lifetime, an instant in which our eyes lock and I lose myself entirely in the beautiful brown of his gaze. Then he moves, quickly, so gently, pulling me close in his embrace and kissing me fiercely.
I have no idea how long the kiss lasts, but I know it’s the sweetest I’ve ever experienced in my life, filled with promise and hope and the beautiful, bursting feeling of a dream coming true.
He breaks the kiss but keeps me close, pulling back just enough to talk. Our foreheads are still resting against each other.
“You’ll be royalty,” he says. “Really royalty.”
“I don’t care about that,” I say. “I don’t care about the crown. I just want you. I want you forever. I want everyone to know I’m yours.”
“And they will,” he promises. “They’ll know it, and they’ll know that I’m yours as well.”
“I’m just a commoner,” I say. “I’m not even Avaranian. Will your people accept it? Will it be another scandal?”
“You’re the mother of my children,” he says. “That’s more important than anything else you are. And you’ll help raise them to rule so that one day they’ll be able to lead this country.”
A little shiver passes through me.
Alex’s arms tighten around me. “What is it? Are you all right?”
“I just don’t think I could be any happier,” I say. “I’m overwhelmed.” A few tears escape my eyes and trickle down my cheeks, and I smile as they reach my lips. “I love you, Alex.”
“I love you too, Erica. Forever.”
Epilogue
A Year Later
“Vito! You scoundrel! What are you doing?”
Vito looks down at the sound of his name and laughs. He is sitting at the top of the main flight of stairs in the palace, leading from the entry foyer to the receiving rooms and ballrooms above. At a year old, he’s bold, daring, and adventurous, but he turns to putty at the sound of his own name.
Thankful that I haven’t changed into my dress yet, I take the stairs two at a time and scoop him into my arms.
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