by Gary Beck
Beth realized that Kiesha’s situation might be worse than hers so she asked, "What are you going to do now?"
"They wants to send me to a motel here in the Bronx, but I ain’t goin’ to some place where they makes me into a prostitute. If I stays in an outer borough I’m just another welfare case. I needs to recertify my welfare benefits since I moved from public housing, then get an apartment, put the kids in day care and go back to school. What about you? What’s your story, missy?"
Beth shrugged helplessly. "One minute I was sound asleep. The next minute our apartment was burning and I was on the street with my family. We lost all our money, credit cards, and clothes and had no place else to go, so the police brought us here. We’ve been sort of out of it all day. I didn’t even remember that Peter should have called his job. He’ll have to do that in the morning. We’ll have to find out the condition of our apartment and when we can move back in. I guess we’ll have to stay here until then, unless they move us to a shelter."
"Once you certified genuinely needy they try to send you to a family shelter in one of the Bronx motels somewhere. Don’t you go. They bad places. They forget about you once you be there and you’re so far away it be hard to get back to the city."
"What do I do if they want to move us there?"
"Say you ain’t goin’. That’s what I did. You say you’re stayin’ here 'til they find shelter space for you in Manhattan. We’ll talk more about it later."
The second night passed more calmly than the first, punctuated by snores, farts, children’s whimpers and the painful sounds of troubled dreams. After they finished the black bag operation of breakfast, Beth felt like she had been in the E.A.U. for weeks. She remembered a Kafka novel that she read in college, ‘The Trial,’ that no longer seemed just a literary fantasy. She was thinking about the loss of identity and the isolation from the outside world, when Ms. Weller called her name.
Ms. Weller was brusque, "This is our second face-to-face interview and we have to resolve your case."
"I’d like that." Ms. Weller glanced at her sharply.
"I see from your forms that you claim to have no funds for emergency housing."
"That’s right. We lost everything in the fire."
"Do you have any documentation to prove your lack of funds?"
"I just told you that we lost everything in the fire."
"Well, your case will have to be classified as presumptive eligibility for services. You’ll have to fill out these forms." She handed Beth a mound of paper.
"Could we use the telephone to call my husband’s job, and the fire department about our apartment?"
Ms. Weller was inflexible. "You’re not eligible for assistance until you’ve been certified."
Beth filled out the forms, then waited and waited. They had lunch and the day went by without another interview. When Ms. Weller got up and put on her coat, Beth went to her and asked, "Could we please get some quarters to make phone calls?"
Ms. Weller looked at her coldly, "I already told you that you cannot get services until you’ve been certified."
"I understand," Beth said patiently. "But if we can just make two phone calls, we might be able to get out of here and not bother you anymore."
"For the last time, we cannot assist you unless you’ve been certified." She marched out without saying another word. Beth walked dejectedly back to her bench.
Kiesha smiled sympathetically. "I know what you’re going through. No matter what happens, you gotta be strong and not let them beat you down. That’s what they’re trying to do, so you don’t make problems for them."
"They won’t beat me down," Beth said determinedly.
"Good, missy. You hang tough, you be all right."
After dinner, another nasty security guard. There seemed to be an endless supply. Then he announced, "The office is closed." The clients reluctantly vacated their benches and shuffled to their camp sites. Confused newcomers were harshly ordered to sit on the floor.
A bewildered woman asked, "Why can’t we sit on the benches? There’s garbage all over the floor."
The guard barked impatiently, "It’s against the rules. Now get moving or I’ll kick you out of here." The woman was forced to docilely obey and led three small children to an unoccupied corner.
Beth and Kiesha watched the exchange and Beth said, "That’s a horrible way to treat people."
"Are you beginning to believe me now?"
"Yes. I’ve got to get my family out of here. Do you have two quarters I can borrow? I’ll pay you back in a few days."
Kiesha shook her head. "I don’t have any money, or I’d give it to you. But I’ve got an idea. I saw that Peter’s still got his watch. There’s a pawn shop a couple of blocks from here on the other side of 149th Street. If you want to pawn it, I’ll take you there in the morning.”
Beth was enthusiastic. "That’s a great idea. We’ve got a date…. It’s nice to make a friend in a place like this."
"You gotta have friends in a place like this," Kiesha said.
A little later, a man walked up to them and bowed respectfully. "My name is Hector Rodriguez. I’d like to talk to you, with your permission."
Beth looked at Kiesha, who asked, "What’s on your mind, Hector?"
He squatted in front of them. "I am here with my two sons and I would not stay where they sent us."
"Where was that?" Beth asked.
"They took us to a motel in Queens, near La Guardia airport. The place was full of pimps, prostitutes, drug dealers and junkies, so I refused to stay there. When I got back they got angry and said I could stay as long as I like, or leave, but there was no other shelter space for my family."
Kiesha looked knowingly at Beth, "I seen you here for a while. What you want with us?"
He shifted self-consciously. "Most of the people here are, how shall I say it? … not able to stand up for themselves."
Kiesha grinned. "Go on."
"I’ve been watching you and this other lady. You do not let them bully you. Perhaps we can help each other get our children out of here to a better place."
"I expect to go home in a few days," Beth said, "but I’ll gladly help while I’m here. I’m Beth and this is Kiesha. Let’s talk a little more."
"May I bring my children here?" Hector asked. "I do not like to leave them alone."
"Sure. Join us," Kiesha said.
Hector got his sons, Pablo, age six and Tito, age three, and introduced them to the other children. They quickly formed a boy’s club with Andy and James and started a game of hide and seek. Hector was average height, but his proud posture made him seem taller. He was slim, dark haired, with an olive complexion and curved nose that revealed his Spanish Indian heritage. He spoke precisely, suggesting the difficulty he was having in maintaining his dignity in a world that despises have-nots.
Beth liked him immediately, but Kiesha was more reserved, "What you want with us?"
Hector leaned forward confidingly, "You do not want to go to one of their motels. Neither do I. If we stick together, maybe we can make them send us to a hotel in midtown Manhattan that won’t be as bad as the motels."
Kiesha didn’t want to encourage him. "I heard they closed those welfare hotels a couple of years ago. That’s why they use the motels, ‘cause they’re far enough away so embarrassing publicity won’t make the city look bad."
Hector shook his head. "With all respect, that is not so. They still have a few hotels for families with children under eight years old. They can’t be as bad as the motels."
Peter had been listening with increasing interest. "A hotel in midtown Manhattan has got to be better than this."
Beth was delighted that Peter was getting involved in their problems. "Hector, this is my husband, Peter."
They shook hands and Peter said, "You’ve got a good idea. How do we find out more?"
"They gave me a metro card to go to Queens," Hector said. "If we can get the address of the hotels, one of us can go there and see what they�
�re like."
This suggestion met with instant approval. They decided that the women would go to the pawn shop in the morning, and the men would check out the hotels in the afternoon. Beth took comfort from the growing camaraderie with people caught in a terrible situation, who refused to be ground down by a harsh system. She had noticed that Kiesha’s speech had improved as they got better acquainted but had reverted to street when Hector first approached them. It improved as he became acceptable. Beth realized she was learning a lot about people and herself. As she drifted in and out of sleep, her thoughts were about her new friends and she hoped that all of them would soon be in better circumstances.
CHAPTER TEN
When Beth and Kiesha got ready to go to the pawnshop with Peter’s watch, Hector saw that Beth didn’t have an overcoat. He said that it wasn’t practical for her to go out in a blanket, so he lent her his coat. She was grateful, since there was still snow on the ground from the last storm of the year 2000 and her sneakers would barely keep her feet warm. Kiesha knew the neighborhood and gave Beth a guided tour of the Mott Haven section of the South Bronx and reassured her that the area wasn’t dangerous. She led Beth into a dingy pawnshop near 146th Street, where she dickered with the Arab behind the counter, and got fifty dollars for a bottom-of- the-line Movado. It suddenly seemed like a fortune. Beth found an old down parka and after much bargaining bought it for ten dollars. Kiesha took Beth the long way back to the E.A.U., showing her the shopping area on 149th Street.
"It’ll be a while before I go shopping," Beth said. They stopped at a deli, where Beth splurged on chocolate milk and cookies for the kids, and donuts and coffee for the adults. The snacks were greeted enthusiastically and rapidly devoured.
Ms. Weller asked them where they had gone, but Kiesha just said, "Out," and Beth repeated it. Ms. Weller recognized they weren’t intimidated and turned and yelled at another client.
After another subsistence lunch, dispensed from black, plastic garbage bags, Beth gave Peter money for carfare, and phone calls to the radio station and the fire department. Beth reassured Hector that she and Kiesha would watch Pablo and Tito, and he left with Peter to visit welfare hotels. The kids were absorbed in their own games, so Beth and Kiesha had a chance to learn more about each other.
"How old are you?" Beth asked.
"I’m twenty."
"Then you had Latoya when you were fifteen?"
"Yeah. I was messed up then. I dropped out of school and did some stupid things. Once I realized my responsibility for my daughter, I got my G.E.D. I guess I messed up again when I got pregnant with James, but I got it together again and started college. It was hard at first. I thought everyone was smarter than me and I kept to myself. Then I did better in class, and I got good marks on my tests and it got easier. I just finished the fall semester, when that thing I told you about with my mom’s boyfriend happened. Now I don’t know when I’ll get back to school."
Beth impulsively hugged her. "We’ll work things out somehow."
At 3:30 p.m., Ms. Weller summoned Beth and informed her that her family was now provisionally eligible for temporary emergency housing, and she would send them to a shelter in the morning.
"Where is the shelter, Ms. Weller?"
"What difference does it make?" Ms. Weller snapped.
Beth was adamant, "I won’t take my family to one of those sleazy motels that are filled with prostitutes and junkies."
"We’re not here to provide luxury housing for our clients."
"I know that. I just want someplace that’s safe and reasonably clean."
"All our emergency shelters are safe and clean. We have a nice shelter here in the Bronx that I’m sure you’ll find satisfactory."
"I’m not going to a Bronx shelter. I live in Manhattan and I won’t go that far away from there."
Ms. Weller was getting angry, "I’ve tried to help you, but if you continue to be difficult, I’ll move you to the back of the list for emergency housing."
"I’m not trying to be difficult. I’m just looking out for my family. I’d rather sleep on the floor here, than put my children at risk."
"You have a very confrontational manner, Ms. Harmon. I suggest that you reconsider your attitude."
"I’m sorry you feel that way. I don’t mean any disrespect. I hope you understand my concern."
"We’ll try another face-to-face tomorrow," Ms. Weller said frigidly.
Beth went back to her chair and Kiesha said, "Right on, missy. If you don’t stand up for yourself, that witch’ll walk all over you."
"I remembered what you said and refused to be bullied."
"Well done. Where did a little girl like you learn to be so tough?"
"I may not be big, but I can take care of myself. I grew up on a farm and got up at fivea.m.for my chores."
"Yeah? Did you milk cows?"
"Yes. And I fed the livestock and chickens."
"What’s it like milking a cow?"
"Squeezing juice from a big nipple. They’re very docile, except for some of the nasty ones who try to kick you. I did it every morning until I went away to college."
"That’s cool. Where did you go to school?"
"I graduated from Michigan State University."
"How old are you?"
"I’m twenty-six."
"Damn, girl. You look like a kid. I though you must have been a teenage mother."
Beth laughed. "After the last few days, I’m beginning to feel like an old lady."
"Don’t you give up hope on me now, hear?" Kiesha said with concern.
"Don’t worry. I’ll do whatever has to be done to protect my family and my friends."
Kiesha grinned and put her arm around Beth, "That’s cool. We’ll see this through together."
The afternoon went by slowly. When Peter and Hector didn’t return by dinnertime Beth began to fret. She nervously asked Kiesha, "Do you think anything happened to them?"
"Don’t get uptight, missy. They had different places to go. That takes time. I’m hoping that they checked out those hotels to be sure they’re good for us. They’ll be back soon." They saved dinners for the men, some kind of processed meat and cheese and soggy carrots. Beth remembered reading in college economics about how the government stored huge quantities of surplus food in giant silos. She hadn’t thought much then about the significance of food being warehoused to protect prices for growers and producers. Now she began to wonder if they kept milk, vegetables, grains and other perishables until they began to rot, then distributed them to the needy. From her new perspective of being homeless, the system was beginning to seem much more complex and far more ruthless.
The clients were chased from the benches after dinner by the standard-issue nasty guard. A little while later, the boys, led by Pablo, were playing narcs and drug dealers loudly and the guard yelled for them to stop.
When they didn’t instantly obey, he started cursing angrily at them. "If you fuckin’ kids don’t shut the fuck up, I’m gonna kick your asses outta here."
He walked menacingly towards them and Beth and Kiesha rushed to their defense. "Please don’t curse at the children," Beth said. She planted herself in front of him and Kiesha stood next to her.
The guard glared. "Then shut them up. They’re disturbing the clients."
Beth tried to be reasonable, "They’re just being kids. Nobody’s complaining."
"This ain’t no playground, lady. You keep them quiet, or you’ll be asked to leave."
Beth was indignant, "We’re trying to obey the rules, however humiliating and degrading some of them may be. You could at least let the children have some fun, so they still feel like they’re human beings."
The guard sneered. "Just keep them quiet," and swaggered off.
The children didn’t understand that they had done anything wrong and it was difficult for Beth to explain that they couldn’t do things the way they would at home. "This is an office and we’ve got to follow their rules while we’re here."
P
ablo looked at her suspiciously, "My poppi wouldn’t let that guy curse at us."
"I stopped him and so did Kiesha," Beth said. "We’ll look out for you when your poppi’s not here."
Jennifer was upset, "The boys didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t like this place. When are we getting out of here? I want to go home."
Beth was optimistic. "In a few days, sweetie. Please be patient. I don’t like this place either, but at least we’ve got some new friends and that makes it easier." Jennifer was temporarily consoled, and she huddled with Latoya, and they started whispering little girl secrets back and forth. The boys sat in a circle, subdued after their harsh treatment and quietly played with the X-men action figures.
Beth looked at Kiesha. "We have to take the kids to a park or playground. If they don’t burn up some energy, they’ll bounce off the walls."
"There’s a park a few blocks away. We can take the kids in the morning after breakfast."
Peter and Hector came in a few minutes later, cold and tired. Pablo told Hector about the guard cursing at them and he got angry and wanted to confront him, but Beth persuaded him to let it go. Hector sat down with Pablo and Tito.
Beth took Peter aside and asked him about the job and the apartment. "I’ve got good news and bad news. My boss was very understanding. He assured me that I still have a job and I should come back to work as soon as I can."
Beth hugged him. "That’s great."
"The bad news is that we can’t get back into the apartment for a while."
"How long?"
"I don’t know. The fire marshal decided that the fire was of suspicious origin, and the landlord’s blaming us. The apartment has to be renovated and the landlord swears he won’t let us back in."
Beth got the message. "So, we’ll be here for a while?"
