Consider for a moment your greatest irrational fear. Many people will say heights, spiders, or flying in a plane. Most of us have at least a mild phobia about something. Consider where it came from—what made you start to feel that way? You may find that it’s not hard to locate a memory or event in your life that triggered this unreasonable way of thinking. Our fears about OBEs may be linked to childhood dreams or simply an overactive imagination. But they can also be linked to a fear of the paranormal. Even as adults, we see the paranormal constantly portrayed as something fearful and dark. This is related to the paranormal inaccurately being linked to the occult, along with the baggage of some religious doctrines. It is very easy to recall these references when we are alone in a darkened room, trying to connect to an unseen plane normally associated with the spirit or the soul. These associations are unfortunate and can really hold some people back, but we must remember that they are purely the invention of Hollywood and fairy tales. The out-of-body state is actually energising, peaceful, and deeply spiritual, and has nothing to do with anything negative. I have spent much of my life in this nonphysical state and, as time has passed, I have become healthier, happier, and more compassionate. In short, OBEs have made me a better person. They can do the same for you.
To clarify these points, I’m going to address in depth some of the common specific fears people sometimes have.
Will you encounter negative entities?
This is an understandable worry for many people that I hear again and again, but I believe it is based on a slight misconception of how the out-of-body state works. I believe it is a misconception to view the OBE in terms of spirits or souls, and good and evil. Our understanding has moved beyond such notions in my opinion. Why do I view things in this way?
First, I have never encountered a negative entity during an OBE. This, I believe, is because we seem to be drawn to situations that are in line with our emotional and psychological make-up. If we are generally balanced and positive, then we will experience a balanced and positive environment. (I am not even convinced that negative entities exist, any more than I believe evil people exist. I see people in the world who do things I find morally and emotionally abhorrent, but I view this as the result of their circumstances and influences, not inherent evil or negativity.) If someone has a real concern about negative entities drawn from a particular religion or belief system, they should consider seeking support from their religious community or a counselor before attempting any of the processes in this book. The OBE in my view is a life-affirming journey of discovery into a world populated by light and wonder, not a world of darkness, shame, or demonic forces.
Can an entity enter your physical body while you are out-of-body?
The short answer, in my understanding, is no. As far as I’m concerned, the particular make-up of our consciousness only works with us. You could look at this as being similar to a fingerprint; it is unique to you, no one else has the same pattern. In the same sense, your body/brain’s imprint is unique and no one else can “invade” this, any more than a person can jump into your body while you are physical. Just because you are on a higher energetic plane, in a finer form of matter, or your consciousness is extended (depending on how you view the out-of-body state), it does not change the uniqueness of your particular pattern or imprint. In my own OBEs, I have generally encountered other entities or beings in what seemed like a very physical body to me. It was just that we were operating on another level or plane. There was no way I could imagine them even accessing my personal space, let alone my body.
Both of the concerns above really derive from superstition about voodoo, witchcraft, exorcisms, and other misconceptions about the nature of consciousness and reality. I have focused on scientific approaches in this book in an effort to move away from these superstitions. As you have already learnt, science continues to reveal new information about the paranormal that can transform our understanding and allow us to let go of the preconceptions that may have held us back, such as the fear of demons and other dark forces.
Can you spy on people or can they spy on you while out of the body?
This is very uncommon in OBE reports, although there are instances of it happening especially through remote viewing techniques. Our innate desire for privacy seems to limit the ability of others to observe us psychically when we don’t wish to be, and it creates a kind of psychic barrier or shield around our private emotions and activities. How this works is a mystery, but if an emotional connection is the key to success in psychical endeavors, as it seems to be, then it follows that a disconnection or block would have the opposite effect. I can think of only a couple of times in my life when I encountered a situation that seemed to contradict this notion of a psychic barrier. The first took place in central London, where I drifted through the wall of a large white building, almost mansionlike, not far from the center of the city. I came into a large lounge area decorated with very expensive furnishings, and as I moved through the space, a woman who appeared to be of Middle-eastern descent came into the doorway and stopped in her tracks. She seemed to see me! I must admit I was as surprised by this as she must have been and also froze, not sure how to react. She started to speak in Arabic, and raised her hands in the open-handed gesture of a Muslim prayer, as if seeing me as something of great spiritual significance. I was so startled myself that I fled the scene and phased back to my body.
Once in normal consciousness again, I slightly regretted leaving so quickly, but at the time I had simply not known what to do. Being seen was a whole new experience for me and I had no idea what it could mean. I researched apparitions of the living afterward, and even the concept of materialization, but was not able to be seen again. In a sense, being seen in this way can be frightening, as it brings the whole experience into the realm of objective reality again, and reminds us that this is not a dream but something that has a tangible effect in the world. It even makes you wonder if there could be some potential harm in becoming so physical that someone can see you. Yet despite these worries, I have never found any of this to be the case. The OBE is simply operating on a plane level that is unaffected by the types of things that would harm us in everyday life.
What if you can’t get back to your body?
This is a valid concern—after all, the idea of traveling to locations across the universe is an amazing prospect, but if we can’t return to our normal lives afterward, the appeal is obviously much less! Let me explain my own experience in a way that I think will address this concern.
Since my first OBE back when I was a child, my main goal has been to extend the experience. I found that, as I left my body, I would immediately feel a sense of urgency, since I was well aware that the average experience lasts just twenty minutes. Some, of course, lasted much longer, but most would end very close to this time frame. I believe that this is due to the simple fact that our awareness is normally seated in the body and, whenever this is affected by an OBE or other altered state, there is a sense of the body or brain wanting to realign itself and return to the “normal way” that it functions and perceives the world.
This reveals a key fact about OBEs: it is not hard to return to the body; rather, it is necessary to learn to maintain the out-of-body state for an extended period. Many people experience a kind of “pulling back” to their body or a simple phasing out, as if their consciousness is dissolving back into their body. My own OBEs tend to end with this fading of my consciousness from the exterior state to body awareness again. I have never once had trouble getting back to my body, even after many hundreds of journeys, and even to locations off this planet and outside this level of reality altogether.
Can you die if you are disturbed while out of your body?
This question goes back to the history of the out-of-body experience and its esoteric counterpart, astral projection. It was once believed that if your soul was not present in your body and you were jolted into physical consciousness, yo
ur soul connection (often referred to as the silver cord) would be severed and thus you would die. Fortunately, there is little evidence of this occurring. I can think of several instances when I was disturbed while my consciousness was outside my body, and the result was simply an uncomfortable return. The worst time I experienced this resulted in nausea for a few minutes, nothing more. Of course, it is best to avoid being disturbed if you can when doing your OBE practice, but it is not something to overly concern yourself with. Just take simple precautions such as turning off cell phones, asking those in your home not to interrupt you, and perhaps using earplugs as well as an eye-mask. This will increase your immersion in the process and reduce the discomfort that being abruptly disturbed may cause.
What if my silver cord gets severed?
If the silver cord exists (and I must admit I’ve never seen one), it is infinitely flexible and able to transform and become invisible, so there is little chance of anything happening to it, or to you. As I mentioned earlier, this book takes the most scientific approach I can give to the subject matter, and the existence of the silver cord does not fit well with the newer concept of OBEs being a form of extended awareness or consciousness. I will discuss this more later, but what is clear is that only a few people see a silver cord and it does not seem to matter at all to the quality of the OBE whether you do or not.
Are there any long-term
side effects to out-of-body experiences?
My answer is no, assuming that you are in good health psychologically. I can see nothing negative coming from these experiences and, on the contrary, I’ve seen huge benefits. These include a greater sense of well-being, the fear of death dissolving, and the growth of spiritual understanding and awareness.
The only thing remaining is to look at your fears in a direct way and try to address them so that you have a greater degree of likely success in the OBE techniques. It is natural to feel fear when we are faced with the unknown or a situation that could spell potential danger. We must understand that fear does not stop us doing anything; we still have choices and we can learn to feel more comfortable with difficult situations. The familiar and the comfortable are not scary; in fact, for most of us they are a source of support and solace. So our goal when dealing with the object of our fear is to bring it from the realm of the unknown into the realm of the inspirational and supportive.
Many of us will have experienced fear when we have to speak publicly or perform in front of a large crowd. I remember my own anxiety when I first gave lectures and workshops; I would experience physical symptoms such as butterflies in my stomach and even sleeplessness the night before. However, I learnt over time that I would always feel good after the lecture. I then learnt to focus on this aspect of the process. I also practiced visualizing myself up on stage in front of hundreds of people and I soon became comfortable there. The once-terrifying idea of having to stand in front of people and speak eventually became everyday, familiar, and actually enjoyable. I also learnt to be more comfortable with my fears as they became less important; after all, I knew that nothing negative was actually going to happen. I learnt to see my being on stage as simply having a conversation with a large group, which in my mind was no different from, and no more threatening than, having a conversation with a small group or one person.
Conquering fear is about shifting the way we look at the beliefs that we have. It is a process of exploring what the fear is and where it arises from. Usually we find that our fears are unfounded and that the situations we fear are actually opportunities for expansion, and can even be life-changing in many ways. In this sense, fear actually means opportunity—it is the signal that change is on the horizon, and that can be a very exciting possibility. You may want to seek out others who are also interested in OBEs as you learn to overcome your fears. You can join a group, attend lectures and workshops, or join an online community. These resources will give you greater knowledge and familiarity with the topic, and will also speed your development. Connecting with others with a similar worldview will inspire and motivate you. This sense of community is invaluable; feeling isolated is one of the worst factors for people trying to explore their spirituality. It should never be underestimated how important it is to have people we can turn to for advice and solace. Social networking websites too are growing in popularity every day; by using these tools, we can connect directly with those who share our goals. If there is no group or activity in your area, starting a simple group on a social networking site will allow you to benefit yourself and others.
Exercise: Conquering fear
Step 1: Identify your fears.
Step 2: Experience your fears.
Step 3: Gain control of your fears.
Step 1 in this process is to identify your emotional reactions to the idea of leaving your body. How does the idea make you feel? You can start by making a “mind map”—a drawing of your ideas and how they relate to each other. In your journal, write down all of the emotional responses you have toward the idea of an out-of-body experience, reasonable or not. Really think about what you have learnt of this state of awareness. Do you feel any tension or discomfort arising? As you go through this process, explore these feelings further by creating a sub-branch of your mind map for each one. Try to look into the core of yourself: where has this tension arisen from? What is at the root of it? I often find that the limitations and blocks behind these feelings are never very far from the surface and can be easily explored in this way if you are honest with yourself and give yourself plenty of time to go through the process.
Step 2 is to experience these fears by really feeling the arising emotions. Don’t suppress them; let them be fully realised, but as you do so, also step outside of them and view them objectively as an onlooker. Imagine yourself watching from a distance, like watching a play or a movie. How does this make you feel? Now take a moment to recognize the part of yourself that is outside of these fears, the part that is familiar with them but doesn’t fear at all. There is always a part of you that is not engaged in the emotions of the mind—the observer. Now allow this clear, fully present part of yourself to become familiar. Before returning to your thoughts about the fears you’ve identified, ask yourself: do you feel different? Does your state of awareness now feel calmer, stronger, more relaxed, more centered? When we arrive at this awareness, we can more easily feel at home in these unusual experiences. We know from an emotional as well as intellectual standpoint that there is nothing but joy and inspiration in experiences beyond our bodies. Visualize the qualities and colours of your everyday self changing to those of the calm, peaceful observer self. See them now as one, and know that the fear was an illusion of the mind.
Step 3 is to gain control of the emotions surrounding your OBEs to transform them into powerful tools to propel you toward life-changing experiences. The best way to do this is through trance, the state in which we have access to the full range of our faculties. Richard Bandler, cofounder of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), puts it like this: “Many people think that when you go into a trance you lose control of yourself; in fact, you gain control. You gain the ability to control your heart rate, your blood pressure, your ability to remember, your ability to use physical strength or dexterity, your ability to control time and your perceptions.”1
Trance is simply a kind of mental focus, similar to meditation, which gives us access to our most powerful psychological resources. It is best not to concern yourself with what a trance is or is not, but simply to focus on the different aspects of moving your attention to your inner landscape. This will help with the wider goal of achieving OBEs, so trance is an important and useful tool to learn at this foundational stage of the process. Here’s a short introduction to the process.
Exercise: Trance
Step 1: Find a comfortable armchair or other suitable seat in which you can be totally supported, as you are going to reach a level of relaxation in which your
muscles will be totally loose and free of tension.
Step 2: We’ll start with focusing on breathing; take a series of slow, deep breaths. Allow yourself to find your own rhythm, but deepen your breathing; breathe in and out with relaxed, natural motions.
Step 3: With each outward breath, let go of all tensions and thoughts. As thoughts arise, become aware of them. Sense their energy, sense where they have arisen from (work, relationships, etc.), and then see the colour and shape of the energy of that emotion.
Step 4: Now return to the observer state of mind that you experienced in step 2 of the previous exercise, in which there is no fear. Let the energy of that safe space shift and change the colour and form of the emotion. Do this until you feel peaceful and still.
Step 5: When you’re ready, slowly bring yourself to full alertness while retaining the state of peace and awareness. You have now experienced trance: the state of being mentally focused, yet relaxed.
Apathy and Motivation
Apathy—the absence of passion or lack of motivation—can also have its root in fear, since we may avoid doing something precisely because we want to avoid succeeding. Apathy is actually the most common reason people fail. It is not that the fear of having an out-of-body experience is too much, or that the necessary skills are too complex; it is simply that most people do not put the techniques and skills they have learnt into practice, or they start but give up too soon. I have found that the longer we put hobbies or interests on hold, the less likely it becomes that we will return to them. When we feel hesitation or lack of initiative, we can learn to understand this as our cue to act, especially when we keep in mind that pushing ourselves into action is the factor that divides those who succeed from those who don’t. We can inject some inspiration into the process to get things moving. If you feel that pinch of hesitation or avoidance, read something inspiring to motivate you, go over some of the techniques in the appendix, put on some music to create an atmosphere, but most important of all, learn to recognize this uncomfortable feeling as your cue to act. Many seek out a quick avenue to success, a shortcut that will allow them to avoid the potential stress of doing the practice. The irony is that I’ve seen many people spend more time looking for a shortcut than it would have taken them to simply undertake the steady process of development. People spend millions each year looking for a quick fix—a way to lose weight without exercise, become rich without work, or achieve spiritual awareness without practice. The reality in each case is the same: each requires change and dedication, and a set of simple yet effective skills. Success in life is never found through avoidance. It is found through a deeper understanding of our particular area of interest. Immersing ourselves deeply in a process, to the point that it is almost unavoidable, ensures that we will achieve some level of success.
Navigating the Out-of-Body Experience Page 7
