“You have a Christmas tree with lights. So does most of the town, and I can tell you that a lot more people than you keep them on overnight.”
“You don’t understand.”
“Nick, look at me!”
Nick turned as Tyler waved from the side of the truck. Brynn pulled away, crossing her arms over her chest. He felt the loss of her all the way to his bones.
“Hey, buddy.”
“I got to turn the lights on and off.” He ran forward. “But the Christmas tree blew up, and now we’re going to have to live with Grandma.” He made a face. “Her house smells like old socks.”
“Your mom told me you were very brave.”
He heard Brynn draw in a sharp breath. “You were very brave,” she repeated, her voice trembling.
Without thinking, he moved closer to her, hoping to offer whatever comfort he could. “You were both brave.” He turned toward Brynn. “Why would you have to live with your mother?”
“Nick, look at the house. Kel says—”
“The kitchen and family room will need to be restored.” The fire chief approached from the back of the truck.
Tyler, who’d moved next to Brynn, didn’t look quite as jubilant as when he’d been on the side of the truck. “Do you think my Legos survived?” he asked, a catch in his voice. “I finished building the space station yesterday.”
“Maybe,” Kel offered. “Things need to cool off a bit and then we can assess.”
“Hey, Kel, has Tyler been up to the top of the truck?” Nick gave the fire chief a pointed look.
“Would you like to climb up?” The other man placed a hand on Tyler’s shoulder. “I’ll even let you.”
Tyler sniffed and glanced at his mom for approval.
To her credit, Brynn’s smile was genuine. “That’s a great idea, bud.” She bent and hugged her son. “I know it will be a huge bummer if your stuff got damaged, but stuff is replaceable. You’re not. All that matters to me is we made it out safely. We also need to thank Chief Barrett and the rest of the fire crew for getting here so quickly. Things could have been a lot worse.”
“Thanks,” Tyler dutifully told the chief.
“My pleasure, son.” Kel led the boy around the truck, the word son reverberating through Nick’s chest.
Tyler had no father.
“Have you talked to your mom yet?” He bent his knees so he was at eye level with Brynn.
She shook her head.
“I know you don’t want to move back in that house.”
“What choice do I have?”
“Mara and Kaitlin—”
“Have lives of their own. I won’t be a burden to them.”
“Neither of them would consider you a burden.”
“We’ll be fine at my mom’s,” she insisted even as she cringed. “Hopefully Josh will have a crew over here quickly. Maybe we’ll be back in by Christmas?”
“Stay with me,” he said on a rush of breath.
Her lips parted. “You don’t mean that.”
He shouldn’t make the offer. Not with how being near Brynn affected him. It was hard enough planning to see her regularly because of Remi. Having her under his roof would be like slow torture. Reminding him of all the things he didn’t—couldn’t—have in his life.
“I do,” he said because clearly he had an emotional death wish. “I have the extra rooms and it will be good for Remi. You won’t have to go back and forth between my house and yours to see her. Tyler would love it.”
She shook her head. “I’m not sure, Nick. What will people think?”
“Who cares? It’s the right thing.” Now that the idea had taken root, he couldn’t seem to shake it. He knew this rediscovered closeness with Brynn would most likely stop when her foster application went through. The built-in end date made the whole thing almost irresistible. “No one can deny the connection Tyler has with Remi but visiting a baby for an hour or so is different than having one move into your house. This will get him used to the day-to-day business of sharing you and his home in a place that’s neutral for him.”
“You sound like a counselor.” The barest glimmer of a smile played around the edges of her mouth. “When did you get so smart, Chief Dunlap?”
“I was born this way. You never noticed before now because you were too dazzled by my good looks.”
Her eyes went wide for a moment, and he wondered if he’d overstepped with the teasing. “I was dazzled by you. That part is true.” She rolled her eyes. “But I guarantee you didn’t show this kind of insight when we were younger.”
He should make some funny comment back to her, keep the moment light. Instead, he let his gaze lower to her mouth as he took the soft ends of her hair between his fingers. “I might not have messed things up so badly if I had.”
She drew in a sharp breath and he stepped away. This was not the time to spook her. “Come on, Brynn,” he coaxed. “We both know it’s not going to be good for anyone if you stay with your mom.”
“She doesn’t even want to meet Remi,” Brynn told him, her full lips pressing into a thin line.
“Her loss,” he said quietly. “All along it’s been her loss. Say yes. Please.”
She shifted and looked to where Tyler had disappeared with Kel. Without turning back to Nick, she nodded. “Yes,” she said finally. “Thank you for the offer. I appreciate it and promise we won’t disrupt your life.” Now she did turn to him. “Very much anyway,” she added with a smile.
“Easy as pie,” he said, ignoring the fact that his heart was beating as fast as if he’d just finished running a marathon.
Chapter Ten
“It’s no big deal,” Nick told Remi later that morning. “She’s a friend, and I’m doing her a favor. Nothing more.”
The baby hopped up and down in the jumping seat he’d affixed in a doorway. She chewed on her fist, drool pooling around her chubby fingers.
“No one believes me,” he continued, taking her silence for agreement. “This isn’t about my feelings for Brynn. I’d make the offer for anyone.”
Remi gurgled and bounced with enthusiasm.
“Okay, maybe not for Cyndi Jennings.” He stared at the baby, hands on hips. “When the candle burned down her living room, I wasn’t about to offer to move her into my house. She kept telling me how limber she was because of her gymnast history.”
When the baby continued to bounce, her attention now focused on the ceiling, Nick let out a sigh. He’d thought it strange when Brynn talked to Remi like she could understand, but he found himself having one-sided conversations more often than not.
Remi might not be able to respond with words, but it still felt like she was a good listener.
Voices at the front of his house had him moving toward the door. Teddy barked and trotted along at his side. “Best behavior,” he warned the dog. “We’re both going to be on our best behavior while they’re here.”
The black Lab whined low in his throat.
“No matter how hard it is for either of us.”
He opened the door as Kaitlin walked up the porch steps followed by Tyler holding a pillow tight between his arms and carrying a backpack that looked like it weighed about as much as he did.
“Can I help?”
“Is Remi awake or napping?” Tyler asked, scratching Teddy’s soft head.
“In her jumper seat in the kitchen. If you want to go check on her, I’ll help your mom unload the car.”
“There’s not much,” Kaitlin told him. “She only packed enough for a few days. I think she’s still hoping that Josh will perform some renovation miracle.”
“If anyone can, it would be Josh, but I doubt it.”
“It was nice of you to let her stay here.” Kaitlin looked over her shoulder. “Finn and I would have been happy to have them but...”
“She has a h
ard time accepting help.” Nick sighed. “I’ve known her long enough that I could get away with bullying her into it.”
“I doubt you bullied her,” Kaitlin said with a laugh.
“I think Remi being here sealed the deal. You can put the suitcases at the bottom of the staircase. I’ll get the rest.”
She nodded but her brows drew together as if she wanted to say more. Whatever it was, Nick didn’t want to hear it, so he jogged down the front walk to Brynn’s compact Toyota.
The sun was just rising, and a light wind had picked up, reminding him that although it didn’t snow often in this part of the state, winter was fully on its way.
“You travel light,” he said, offering her a smile, which he noticed she didn’t return.
“I ruined it.” She tugged her lower lip between her front teeth. “A few weeks before Christmas and I’ve ruined everything.”
The pain in her voice made his heart hurt. He grasped her arms and squeezed. “Nothing is ruined, Brynn.”
“Tyler’s already been through so much this year and now we’re going to be displaced for Christmas.” She tried to laugh but it came out sounding more like a sob. “Imagine the years of therapy he’s going to need to process all of this. I’m the worst moth—”
“Don’t say that.” He placed a finger to her mouth. “You’re a fantastic mom. Yes, he’s had trauma, but you’re seeing him through it. If he needs counseling when he’s older, you’ll support him through that, as well. Hell, I see enough people in my job that could use someone to talk to. There’s no shame.”
She swiped at her cheeks. “I’d never make him feel ashamed. Unfortunately, I’m another story.”
He could see the dark circles under her eyes and the sharp pull of worry at the corners of her mouth. “You’re exhausted, sweetheart.”
“Great. On top everything else, I look like crap.”
“I didn’t say that.” Nick let her go and picked up a duffel bag as she closed the trunk. “You’re always beautiful. But a fire is upsetting for anyone. Let’s go inside, have something to eat and then you and Tyler can get some rest.”
“Nick.”
“Yes?”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“What?”
“Call me beautiful.” She strapped her purse to one shoulder and began to wheel her suitcase up the walk. “It’s the second time you’ve made the comment in the past week. I’ve never been beautiful, and at this point in my life, I don’t care. You don’t have to try to placate me.”
“I’m a lot of things,” he told her, as he followed. “But I don’t lie, and I won’t blow sunshine up anyone’s skirt. Even yours. I’m telling you you’re beautiful because it’s true, Brynn. Whether you choose to believe me is on you.”
They got to the porch and he grabbed the suitcase’s handle when she would have lifted it. “Let me get that. You and Tyler will be staying upstairs. I moved Remi to the sitting room so Ty can have the spare bedroom and she’ll be across the hall. You’ll have the master.”
“I can’t take your bedroom,” she said, sounding shocked that he’d made the suggestion.
“It’s already done.” He entered the house and gave Teddy a quick scratch between the ears. “I’ve moved my things to the office on the first floor. It has a pullout couch.”
“Nick, no.”
“Mom, come and watch Remi jump,” Tyler hollered from the kitchen.
“Go ahead,” Nick said with a smile. “I’ll bring the bags upstairs.”
“Leave mine down here,” she told him. “I don’t mind the pullout.”
Like hell he was going to put her on a lumpy sofa-bed mattress. Nick could sleep wherever, so the arrangement suited him fine.
“Mom!”
“Coming,” she called. “We’re not done with this discussion,” she said to Nick’s back.
She could discuss it until the cows came home. Nick wasn’t going to change his mind. It took two trips to transfer all of the luggage upstairs. He deposited it in their respective bedrooms, replacing the pillow in the spare room with the one Tyler brought. He wished the boy had more things to make him feel at home.
He made his way back downstairs as Kaitlin was leaving.
“Thanks for your help,” he told her. Her car was parked at the curb in front of Brynn’s.
“If this doesn’t work out, she’s welcome with us.” She gave him an expectant look. “I know Mara and Parker feel the same.”
“She’s fine here.”
The blonde didn’t look convinced. “Finn says you’re in love with her,” she said in a hushed tone. Her hand tightened on the doorknob.
“Finn talks too much,” Nick grumbled. “Brynn and I are friends, and I haven’t been a very good one. I’m making up for lost time.”
“She needs someone who will put her first in his life.” She studied Nick. “Mara and I still have a number of potential suitors in mind.”
“Suitors?” Nick choked out a laugh to hide the irritation that flamed in his chest. “Is this the eighteenth century? I’m sure Brynn is plenty capable of finding herself a date if she wants one.”
“She wants one.” Kaitlin clearly wasn’t going to argue the point. “We promised her twelve dates before Christmas.”
“I heard,” he muttered.
“She’s been on two so far.”
He wondered if the pretty blonde could hear his teeth grinding. “I know.”
“We discussed the number of dates but not who she’d go out with. The point isn’t for her to meet a dozen different men. I’ll admit Mara and I hoped she’d meet a nice man and have multiple dates with him.” Kaitlin leaned in closer like she was telling him a secret. “With her Mr. Right. Any ideas of whom that might be?”
Nick’s breath stuttered to a halt in his lungs. He couldn’t imagine Brynn’s friends would think he’d make a good match. Not when Finn and Parker understood how badly he’d treated her in high school. And they knew about his vow regarding love. Dating and a moratorium on love didn’t exactly go hand in hand.
“I’m not right for her.” The words sounded rough as they rolled off his tongue.
“She’s got a lot going on right now,” Kaitlin said as if he hadn’t spoken. “It would be nice if someone she trusted could help her enjoy the next few weeks. She deserves a special Christmas. She and Tyler both.”
He nodded. “Yeah, they do.” Maybe he wasn’t perfect or right for her, but he’d vowed to himself to help her through this Christmas. Maybe the fact that her friend seemed to support the idea meant he wasn’t so ill-fitted for the role, after all. At least temporarily. “I’ll do my best.”
Kaitlin gave him a slow smile. “That’s all anyone can do.”
* * *
Brynn stared at the ceiling of Nick’s bedroom late that night, wishing she could fall asleep. She was afraid to nod off to dreams of Nick and then wake in the morning alone in his bed.
She was lying in Nick’s bed. They’d argued about where she should sleep, but in the end, it had been Tyler who’d convinced her to give up the fight. As the boy’s bedtime had drawn closer, he’d gotten an almost haunted look on his face. The same look she remembered from the weeks after Daniel’s death. He’d taken her hand and asked how far her bedroom was from the one he was staying in.
The vulnerability in his eyes had torn her heart open all over again. She’d offered that he could sleep in the bed with her, but her sweet, brave son had insisted that he’d be fine in his own bed.
Nick had told the boy they were safe, and that Nick would be right there if anything happened or if Brynn, Tyler or Remi needed him. Tyler had listened intently and then let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders deflating as if they’d been carrying a heavy weight.
He’d put on a brave face when she picked him up from school earlier that afternoon to pack his bag and mov
e what was salvageable from the family room. Tears had lodged in her throat as she’d taken in the damage from the soggy carpet to the smoke-stained furniture.
After meeting with the insurance agent, she’d spoken with Josh at the mill and he’d promised to start the restoration work as soon as possible and that his crew would make the house even better than it had been.
Better was good but with all of the changes pummeling them, Brynn could have done without updated appliances if it meant a little consistency in her world.
She threw back the covers and placed her feet on the thick rug that took up most of the floor. How in the world was she supposed to sleep with Nick’s scent surrounding her all night? He’d told her the sheets were clean, but under the freshness of laundry detergent was his smell. She’d hung her clothes next to his in the closet, and it had taken a monumental effort to resist burying her face in his shirts.
Her body felt charged with electricity, and tonight was only the beginning.
No, she scolded herself. She would not freak out about Nick’s smell or the way his laugh rumbled through her when he reacted to the jokes Tyler liked to tell.
But she appreciated being able to put Remi down for bed and then tuck in her son without having to get in her car and drive to a different house.
Nick had been right that being together would make them feel like a family. Remi was a great distraction for Tyler, a silver lining in the dark cloud of the fire damage. If only Brynn didn’t notice how well Nick fit into their little family.
She straightened from the bed and slipped across the hall, quietly opening the door to Tyler’s bedroom. Her son was sprawled across the mattress, the raggedy stuffed bear he’d packed clasped in his arms. Cleo had been his favorite lovey since he was a baby, although now the well-worn bear spent most of its time on the bookshelf of his bedroom.
Watching him sleep with Cleo tonight made Brynn nostalgic for the passage of time.
After shutting the door again, she went to check on Remi, who was also sleeping soundly. Then Brynn padded down the stairs and headed for the kitchen. Maybe a glass of milk would settle her nerves.
A light glowed from the partially open doorway of Nick’s office. Her breath felt like it was coming out in strangled puffs as she moved toward it, drawn forward even though her rational mind warned she should run back up the stairs and not come out of the bedroom again until morning.
His Last-Chance Christmas Family Page 11
