Queen of Two Hearts

by Matilda Martel

  “No, if I know my brother, once he believes we are in love, he will want to make you love him too. He never knows what he wants unless it slips through his fingers.” I inhale and breathe in the scent of her hair, making this perfect memory of our first day together.

  Holding her close, I wish thoughts of Ivar away. I never want to let her go.

  Chapter 13

  ELSA

  Ivar doesn’t return that evening or the following morning or the next day after that. I never mention it to Alecto, but she mentions it to the Queen Mother, Queen Aural, who pays me a visit. Unfortunately, she walks into my room right when I am in the middle of riding Ivo in an improvised reverse straddle that lets him stare at my behind while I have my way with his huge cock. I’m sincerely mortified.

  “Mother! You can’t just walk in. We’re married now! That door was locked.” Ivo’s furious and seconds from coming, when we’re interrupted.

  I rush to grab my robe and curtsy to his mother, who draws closer to the bed instead of politely leaving.

  “You don’t have to curtsy to her, Elsa. She should curtsy to you. You are queen now. What do you want, Mother?” He covers his wet erection with a pillow and sits up.

  “Well, I’m happy one of my sons is fulfilling his obligations. Where the hell is your brother?” She glares at him, assuming he knows.

  “I don’t know where he is. I’m sure he left word with the Chamberlain. Ask him.” Ivo shakes his head in wild irritation and walks her out of our bedroom.

  Halting in her steps, she backs up and walks towards me.

  “My dear, please forgive my son’s neglect. I was in your position once and it’s hard enough to grow accustomed to two husbands, but even harder when one disappears before you get to know him. I’m so ashamed of him right now. He’s always been the responsible one, but he’s grown attached to…” She stops herself before she says something, fearing she will hurt my feelings.

  “I know about his mistress. I don’t know him. His behavior does not hurt me. Ivo has taken good care of me. I have no complaints.” I smile and walk her back towards Ivo, who walks her out. Locking and bolting the door, he turns to me, eyes crazed with a mixture of anger and unfinished lust.

  I play coy. Backing away and tightening my robe, I chew my lip and prepare to run. I don’t get far. Rushing over, Ivo lifts me, throws me over his shoulder and carries me back to bed.

  “Where were we, my queen?”

  Chapter 14

  IVAR

  I’m returning home.

  The week without Elsa has been torture and I fear I’ve made matters worse. But she has never left my thoughts.

  I’ve had no peace.

  How will I ever grow accustomed to sharing a woman so dear to me with Ivo? And how will I ever make her love me now?

  Watching them make love, I thought my heart would thunder straight through my chest. The way she gazed into his eyes, responded to his touch, called out to him in ecstasy. Yes, she did those things with me, but I don’t want anyone else to make her feel as I do. Every thrill she feels with me, she’ll feel with him. Nothing will be special.

  I don’t know how to be special to her.

  Riding my stallion through the forest, my men trailing close behind, I see the castle in the distance and imagine Ivo and Elsa making love in her room.

  I told him to take her. He asked me to stay, and I told him he could have her.

  But I was wrong. He can’t have her. She’s mine, too.

  Chapter 15

  ELSA

  It’s no mystery where Ivar has been, but by the end of the week, they require his return. All three of us must attend the naming of the Privy Council and it’s unlikely that he will allow his younger brother to make the selections alone. My presence is purely ceremonial, but that doesn’t prevent Alecto and the Queen Mother from unsealing the Queen’s chest of jewels.

  When I insist on wearing my latest gift from Ivo, a ruby and diamond necklace, they scramble to find me coordinating jewels to wear with it. My mother-in-law has made it her mission to make sure I look stunning for Ivar’s return, as if it is my beauty or lack of it that has driven him into the arms of his mistress. However, when we are alone, she speaks to me of her true concerns.

  Helping me fix my collar and fasten the bracelet that once belonged to her, she exhales, ducks her head and speaks of the twin’s father.

  “My husbands were not twins. King Haavek was a few years older than his brother, Aspar. Haavek insisted on spending the wedding night alone with me, perhaps to ensure the heirs would be his, and they are, my boys look exactly like him. After that first night, he left me to be with his courtesans, spending weeks with them while I stayed here with King Aspar.” She sighs with sorrow.

  “He didn’t want to love someone he had to share with his brother, because he thought that would make him weak. But when he saw how much Aspar and I loved one another, he regretted his decision. He spent the rest of his life urging me to love him and I never could. My heart always belonged to Aspar. I fear Ivar has made the same tragic mistake as his father and it pains me to know he will endure the same misery.”

  I take her hand in mine and squeeze it. I can offer little comfort without lying. Alecto joins us to finish dressing me.

  “I fear we may be past that now. I say this without the slightest bit of anger or hostility, but the damage that Ivar has done this week may be difficult to undo. I’ve spent almost every minute of the last eight days with Ivo and I’m quite in love. I feel completely his. It’s wrong I know, but I believe I would cry if Ivar came to my bed tonight. I don’t know him at all. He’ll most likely return to his mistress once this meeting is over and I hope he does.” I pout as Alecto places a ruby and diamond tiara on my head.

  “Just remember what I told you. They’re not allowed to upset you. The baby is more important than either of their needs.” She straightens out the bottom of my gown and smiles.

  “Do you really believe I’m with child so soon?” I smooth the dress over my non-existent belly.

  “I was almost sure before, but now I know you are. Your husbands are identical so do not ask me who the father is. I suspect we will never know with any certainty.”

  Looking back at the Queen Mother who now appears despondent, I bow my head and offer some consolation.

  “I promise you. I will try to let him into my heart.”

  She smiles but our touching moment is interrupted by Alecto’s loud interjection.

  “No, not too soon!” She bellows from across the room as she gathers her attendants.

  “Pardon?” Both Queen Aural and I startle at her voice.

  “Ivar is predictable. As soon as he sees that his brother is besotted, he will want to be a part of it, but then he will wallow in self-pity and disappear once again. He loves you, Elsa. But he pities himself more. Reject him, make him feel unworthy and reviled, as if your skin crawls when he touches you. Make him believe you will only ever love his brother. Force him to woo you and earn your love. If he is handed anything too easily, he does not appreciate it. But if he has fought for you and finally won your love, he will stay by your side, always.” She gazes at the Queen Mother who nods at me.

  “She speaks the truth. You must make him work for you. He must lose sleep and feel that he may go mad before you give in. I love my dear boy, but he does not make things easy.”

  I grit my teeth and snarl.

  “Not only do I not want him, but I have to play games to make him want me. This is ridiculous.” I storm out of the room and follow the attendants to the Grand Hall.

  As expected, Ivar is dressed in his regal attire waiting by the entrance of the hall next to his brother. The sight of him brings a sharp pain to my heart. It’s the knife he’s twisted deeper every day since he abandoned me. Eight days without a word to me, his wife. He took my innocence the night before his departure and he could not spend one more moment to bid me farewell. Drawing closer to them, I steel my resolve and fix my eyes on Ivo.
I don’t look at Ivar. He doesn’t exist. When he extends his hand, I walk past it and into Ivo’s embrace.

  “You look ravishing, my love. And you’re wearing your gift.” Ivo’s smile is alive with affection.

  “My handsome King, you look especially appetizing today.” I bring my hand to my mouth to stifle a laugh as he mocks nibbling on my shoulder. We both pretend Ivar is not present.

  He’s nothing to me.

  Chapter 16

  Ivar

  “Hello Elsa, I apologize I’ve been away.” I approach her as we prepare to enter. She looks so beautiful and happy, my heart sinks with every smile she offers my brother.

  “Don’t mention it, Ivar. You were not missed.” She won’t look at me. Her voice offers no softness or affection. She reserves it all for Ivo.

  I tense as I try to respond, but it’s too late to say anything. Our entrance is announced, and the council awaits our undivided attention. Instead of spending time with Elsa, I must deliberate over the qualifications of various noblemen who all want to become advisors to the Kings. It will be a tedious process, but it is a necessary evil.

  While the men argue and boast, Elsa sits alone, embroidering a pattern I’ve overheard is for the nursery. No one has told me she’s expecting but maybe she’s preparing. She’s so lovely, my heart aches with her loss and yet I have no one to blame but myself. Everyone thinks I’ve been with Kathleen, and I haven’t corrected them.

  I’m not sure why.

  Maybe I’m just a stubborn ass who still wants her to feel a small piece of what I’m forced to endure. Has she felt my loss? Or is she grateful I’ve been away and not kept Ivo from her bed? I want to speak to her, but she won’t look at me. I am nothing to her.

  Throughout the afternoon, Ivo creeps to her side to steal a kiss, see to her comfort or share an embrace with little concern for me or any feelings I might harbor. Neither care how their affection might affect me. Each time he approaches, her face lights up with joy and my soul sinks even lower. I think about the anger I’ve tucked away the past eight days and realize how much I’ve missed her. I didn’t think I would love her so soon. I don’t want to be like my father, chasing the love of a woman who will always prefer another and yet I fear that is now an inevitability.

  I don’t know what to do.

  During a break, when Ivo sneaks away to look for wine, I take the seat next to her. Hoping to hear some words that echo the affection she so easily bestowed on our wedding night.

  “Are you upset with me, Elsa?” I can’t look at her. After witnessing the loving gazes she’s lavished on my brother, I can’t bear to see the disdain she carries for me.

  “Not at all, Ivar. I don’t believe I know you well enough to be angry with you.” Her words are curt and lack any warmth. I deserve it. I know I do. But that knowledge doesn’t prevent my stomach from twisting in knots.

  “I’d like to see you tonight.” My voice trembles through a whisper. I could demand it, but I don’t want to make demands.

  Continuing to thread her embroidery, she shakes her head.

  “No, I’m not feeling well today, Ivar. Alecto believes it is probably the baby settling in. But I’m sure Kathleen may be brought here. I don’t mind.”

  “Elsa... I haven’t been with...” I hesitate to reveal the truth. “Baby? Does she think you’re with child?”

  She nods and looks away. “Yes, she tells me she is certain.” Her voice cracks and I finally turn to gaze at her beautiful face. I’ve made her unhappy. My presence is not welcomed.

  “Does she know--”

  She cuts me off and sighs. “She says we may never know who the father is.”

  “Forgive me for being away. I won’t leave again.” I mumble the words and they catch her by surprise.

  Staring into the distance, she pouts and narrows her eyes with disgust. “Do as you wish, Your Majesty. Whatever kept you away must have been far more interesting than me.”

  I try to correct her, but as soon as Ivo returns, she drops her sewing and rushes to his side without ever casting her eyes in my direction. The sight of them, hands entwined, lips locked, eyes lost in one another, makes my blood boil with an all-consuming rage. I’m mad with them but I’m furious with myself. I’m the fool who left his wife in the care of another man who stole her affections, just like I dared him to do. I brought this on myself, but I won’t let him keep her.

  And I won’t let her deny me forever.

  Chapter 17

  Elsa

  In the evening, Ivar tries again, believing I’ve changed my mind. He’s done nothing to woo me or win my affection, but he hopes I have magically forgiven his cruel abandonment with the passing of a few hours. When he finds me lying in the center of the bed, curled up in Ivo’s arms, he chastises him for monopolizing me.

  Without a hint of shame, he snaps at his brother. “You’ve spent enough time with her. Leave us.”

  Ivo chuckles.

  “You do not command me, and I’ve had more time with her because you were somewhere else. She specifically asked me not to leave her. If you wish to lie on your side of the bed so be it, but I’m not leaving.”

  In defiance, he brings me tighter into his embrace and I nuzzle in, as if their voices are bothering me. When Ivo shushes his brother, Ivar storms out of the room, but returns minutes later and like a petulant child crawls into the other side of the bed making as much fuss as he can. By the middle of the night, he finds his way to my pillow, but I continue to edge further away until he gives up.

  For days, Ivar follows me throughout the palace, awkwardly initiating conversation, flirting badly, attempting anything to get my attention except asking my forgiveness. He never asks about my health or the baby that might be his. His concern is only for himself. His heart. His rejection. Thoroughly repulsed, my reply is always the same. I ask when he plans to leave again. Although he insists he’s staying, I do not let him explain his reasons. I do not care.

  I will not open my heart so soon. The part I gave him is broken.

  After multiple attempts and multiple rejections, he swears me off for good and leaves me in peace for one day. Believing his indifference will tempt me to chase him, he sits on his throne brooding and waiting. I do nothing. His silence is a gift.

  But my peace is short-lived when he resumes his pursuit the following day. Although I do not trust him, I cannot deny he has broken through small cracks in my heart. There is something in his eyes that speaks to my soul, whether or not I choose to listen. The blue eyes from my dreams. I believed they were Ivo’s, but the more time I’ve spent in Ivar’s presence, the more I believe they belong to him. But he left me. He left me to be with another.

  How do I live this way forever? I don’t have two hearts.

  After a week of pursuing my affections, I feel pressure to give in to his demands. As his wife, I have a duty to allow him access to the marital bed, but he will know it is nothing more than my duty. I am obligated to give him my body, not my heart. And yet, I fear my feelings.

  Frightened my body will betray me, I ask Ivo not to leave us. I don’t trust my heart. If I give in too soon, he’ll leave me again. When he kisses me, I tense and refrain from kissing him back. Pulling me away from his brother, his mouth trails kisses down my chest, licking my nipples and sucking on them as he did on our wedding night. My senses weaken. It’s exquisite. He’s divine, but I can’t give in after the way he’s treated me. I think of other things, anything not to become too aroused, anything not to give him the satisfaction that I still want him after he abandoned me for another.

  Perhaps he doesn’t have my love, but it’s maddening to discover that I’ve never stopped yearning for him. When his tongue reaches my moistened sex, I fear I will be found out. Panicking, I reach for Ivo to kiss me, pretending to be terrified by this coming violation.

  I cannot give in to him. My heart is still in tatters.

  The sound of Ivo soothing me, kissing me and professing his undying love while he tries to br
ing me to orgasm is far too much for Ivar’s ego. Without uttering a word, he pushes me to one side and leaves us.

  Furious with Ivar, whom I’m certain is watching, I fling myself into Ivo’s arms and beg him to take me.

  “Please, please Ivo! Please, get his scent off me!” I work my way down his torso, grazing my teeth on his rippled abdomen, lingering to appreciate the beauty and perfect form of the man I love.

  “Come here.” Bringing my face to his, he kisses me.

  “Tell me you love me, Elsa.” Reclaiming my lips, his passion quickly sets my soul on fire.

  “I love you, Ivo. Only you.” I don’t care if Ivar can hear me. It’s the truth. Ivo is my heart. He stayed to love me. Ivar did not.

  “You can love him Elsa, but he’ll never come between us. I won’t let him.”

  Flipping me over, he lifts my leg over his waist and sheaths himself deep inside me. The more he gives, the more I surrender to the growing ache slowly giving way to a pleasure we always find together.

  Clawing into his back, I bite his shoulder and scream my release. As my words stammer, I whimper through labored breath.

  “Ivo... you feel so deep. I’ve never had so much of you.” My arousal knows no bounds. The more he loves me, the greedier I become.

  “Elsa, you’re taking all of me. Are you hungry for me?” He strokes my clit as he pushes deeper inside me, setting me off into the greatest heights I’ve ever reached. Gasping and moaning, writhing and thrashing against his hard body, my hips rock into his pelvis until my climax allows him to plunge all the way in, shocking us both into losing any vestige of restraint.