of it as sexual before. She was sure every time she heard this song in the future, she’d cream her panties. And she planned to have this song on a continuous loop on her stereo system.
He flicked his tongue over her nipple in time with the beat, making the music come alive, making her feel part of it. Her hands moved to the back of his head, holding him to her breast, encouraging more pleasure.
“Shade.”
He nipped her tender flesh and then soothed the flicker of pain with the flat of his tongue. His breath stirred across her aroused and sensitive nipple as he sang the final chorus. Her heart had taken on the beat of the music. Every inch of her was in tune with the rhythm and the man. When the song ended, Amanda took a deep breath, almost relieved that it was over so she could collect her scattered senses.
She sucked in a deep, shuddering breath when the next song began. “Darker” was even faster than the previous song—the vocals prominent and edgy. She imagined he’d chosen a certain order of songs for a reason. To excite his one-woman audience. Had it been designed like a set list for a concert? To build and build until the climax of the performance? He’d said something about an encore. All attempts to form a logical stream of though vanished as he made her body part of his music once again. His thumbs stroked her nipples while his lips, teeth and tongue concentrated on the undersides of her breasts and her ribs. He moved to her belly on the next song. Then the insides of her thighs. He didn’t take her, even when she begged. She expected him to please her swollen achy center on the next song, but he turned her onto her stomach and caressed and nibbled on her ass until she began to writhe, her aching nipples and sensitized mound rocking against the satin sheets.
The song ended and the room went quiet. The only sound was her own ragged breathing. The lights went dark. Shade moved away. Amanda lifted her head to locate him, but he wasn’t beside her. He’d left the bed. She blinked her eyes trying to get them to adjust to the sudden lack of light, but everything was blurry, disorienting. She felt intoxicated.
Was it over? Surely he wasn’t planning to leave her this excited without offering her some relief. She rolled onto one side, looking for him in the direction she thought he’d moved.
“Shade?”
A drumbeat sounded, and a white light pulsed once with the beat. She caught sight of Shade standing beside the bed, unrolling a condom down the length of his cock. It stood hard, thick and proud, angled slightly upward. Amanda’s pussy clenched at the sight. An instant later the room went dark again.
Another drumbeat. A blue light pulsed. Shade had one knee on the bed. Then again, darkness.
Another drumbeat. A green light pulsed. He was closer now. Darkness.
Amanda’s heart thudded out of control. She felt exposed. Hunted. Catch me, Shade. Devour me.
Another drumbeat. White light. He tossed her onto her back and jerked her legs apart. Darkness.
Fuck me.
A bass riff began; the lights flashed in time with the complicated line of notes.
Shade’s cock found her opening. He surged forward, filling her at last. He plunged into her with the song’s fast and furious tempo. He was too intense, too breathless to sing. He just fucked her—rough—and she shattered with an orgasm that gripped her so long and so hard she screamed.
“That’s it, baby,” Shade said in a growling rasp of a voice somewhere above her. “Come harder than you’ve ever come in your life.”
He didn’t have to encourage her further; she was there. Holy shit!
She clung to his shoulders with both hands, her back arching off the bed, her entire core clenching at the rock-hard cock pounding into her. Even after the intensity waned, her body shuddered intermittently as she went limp. Her eyes blinked open and she stared up at Shade, sunglasses in place, sweat dripping down his face, neck and chest. Here in her afterglow she wanted her Jacob back, even though Shade was still fucking her like a beast.
She reached up and snatched his sunglasses off and tossed them across the room.
He lost his rhythm and then went entirely still, staring down at her with a wide-eyed shell-shocked expression. “Why did you do that?”
“I want to look into your eyes.”
“Why?”
Because I still prefer the man over the rock star, but she couldn’t say that. “Because they’re such a gorgeous blue.”
He lowered his body over hers, his thrusts slower. He rotated his hips to grind deeper and then buried his face in her throat as he continued.
So even without the sunglasses he wouldn’t look her in the eye while he had sex with her on his bed. His stage. Did he ever let anyone connect with his heart? Amanda’s throat squeezed, robbing her of air. She wrapped both arms around Jacob to hold him as close as possible. After a moment, she opened her eyes and watched the monitor that was focused on his tight, pumping ass as he thrust and churned his hips. The song ended, the lights died.
He collapsed on top of her.
His body, so heavy.
His ragged breathing, so loud.
“I usually time my orgasm with that final drumbeat,” he said.
She wondered how many performances he’d had in this bed. “I don’t mind you taking as long as you need,” she said. Nope, she didn’t mind one bit.
“You’re going to regret saying that.” He pulled out and rose up to reach for the sex swing above him. “Let’s get you up off that bed.”
Amanda didn’t resist being hooked into the straps and harnesses. She didn’t have the strength or the desire to protest.
When he’d finished, she found herself suspended facedown above the bed. Amanda extended her arms in front of her. “I’m like Superman.”
He chuckled. “I guarantee you’ll be flying soon. Do you want the cameras on?”
She craned her neck to look up at the monitor. Gravity was not kind to her boobs in this position. “Um, maybe we should turn those off for now.”
“They do tend to break my concentration after a while,” he said. “Music helps it though.”
“I like the music.”
He used his remote control to turn the cameras and TVs off. The dim lights above the canopy scarcely provided any light. If she hadn’t been tethered to the ceiling by something resembling a crazy piece of exercise equipment, she might have thought the mood was romantic. When music flooded the room with sound and the melody registered in her addled mind, Amanda could scarcely believe her ears.
“Classical?”
“You don’t like classical music?” he asked.
“I do. I’m just surprised that you like it.”
“It has great build and crescendos. Just like good sex.”
She chuckled. “I never thought of it that way.”
“Anyone ever tell you that you talk too much?” he asked. At her back, he grabbed the strap that was wrapped around her midsection and hoisted her up into a forty-five degree angle. Her knees were still several inches off the bed. She was surprised at how weightless she felt.
“Yeah,” she said. “All the time.”
“I’d kiss you quiet, but I’m going to be back here for a while. Hold your questions until the end.”
She laughed. “I’ll try.”
He positioned himself to kneel behind her, lifted her by the hips and slowly lowered her until his cockhead was probing her opening. Shifting his hips to find a better angle, he placed both large hands to her breasts and pulled her down onto his shaft. He used the momentum of her weight and the recoil of the swing’s springs to find a rhythm. The angle of his penetration felt amazing. The ease of movement kept her muscles from tiring. And the damned thing was just a lot of fun. In fact, she didn’t know if she should moan in pleasure or giggle in glee as her body bounced with the action of the spring. It took her less than a minute to decide that moaning was the best response. Once Shade had his rhythm in tune with the music, he continued to use one hand to pull their bodies together. The other began to roam her heated flesh—breasts, belly, thighs, h
ips. Suspended as she was, she had no choice but to give herself over to the pleasure. There was no fighting Shade’s experienced delivery. When the music built toward the crescendo, his fingertips sought her clit and sent her flying. Her body strained to find grounding as she soared into nirvana. The only thing solid she felt connected to was him.
“Oh!”
When she’d recovered her breath, he shifted her position so that she was still suspended, but now on her side. Startled by the loss of her center of gravity, she clutched at him for balance.
“Easy, baby,” he said. “Trust the swing to hold you. Trust me to guide you. You won’t fall.”
Her breathing slowed, and she removed her death grip from Shade’s forearm. She did trust him. She wasn’t so sure about the collections of straps wrapped around her body.
He took her from the side in a position that would have been impossible to maintain for more than a few seconds without the assistance of the swing. She loved this position because she could see some of him. See the blend of concentration and pleasure on his strong, handsome face. See the sweat dripping from his brow. See the flexion of his bulging biceps as he tugged her body toward him and thrust in time with the music. She was floating on air. She wondered how long he could keep this up. While it was easy on her body, he had to be getting tired.
Amanda soon learned that a man with a sex swing, stamina, and fantastic upper body strength could fuck a woman into a state of delirium. Especially a man who knew at least forty-five positions. She lost count of how many times he brought her to orgasm. When he claimed his own release at last, she strained against him as he brought her to the pinnacle once again. “Jacob.”
After his shaky breathing quieted, he released her from the swing and gently lowered her to the bed. She tried to lift her trembling arms to hold him. She wanted so much to hold him. “I can’t move,” she whispered.
He cradled her body against his sweat-slick body, her head resting on one of his arms, and then folded the bed sheet over their entangled bodies. “Sleep now,” he whispered.
Her eyelids were minutes ahead of him.
Chapter 10Someone cuddled up against Shade’s side, and his eyes flipped open. Sunlight streamed from between the window blinds and across the tangled black and red sheets of his bed. Okay, he was going to look down at the warm, soft body pressed against his side and it wasn’t going to be Amanda. Because if it was her, if last night had really happened and not just been the most amazing wet dream of his life, he’d fucked things up big time.
He tilted his chin, praying it was some random groupie using his shoulder as a pillow.
No such luck. His heart skipped a beat as Amanda’s beautiful face, peaceful in sleep, graced his vision. It skipped a second beat when the enormity of their situation settled in his thoughts.
Shit. Shit. Shit. What had they done? What had he done? He’d touched the untouchable. Touched? Hell, he’d fucked her to the point of unconsciousness. And now he felt how much he’d relished their physical contact in every aching, weary muscle of his body. But just because he’d enjoyed it, just because being with her had surpassed all expectations, didn’t make it right. What was it about sunlight that brought him back to his senses? And made one of the most wonderful nights of his life seem like a mistake.
He lay there for a long while, staring at the ceiling and stroking Amanda’s arm absently, trying to sort through the mess he’d made. He knew they had to keep this from everyone, especially Tina. The woman would use his indiscretion with her sister against him. He knew that. She’d use it as an excuse to keep him from Julie and as much as he adored Amanda, he couldn’t do anything to jeopardize his already limited relationship with his daughter.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Why hadn’t he thought of these things last night before he’d acted on impulse?
Amanda murmured in her sleep, “Dogs don’t have money for rent.”
He smiled, wondering what she was dreaming about. Not him, apparently. Which was for the best. As much as he hated the idea of never spending another night engulfed by her heat and her heart, this couldn’t go any farther. And they couldn’t do this again. Ever. He had to make that clear to her. God, he hoped she didn’t cry when he made his lack of intentions clear. He wasn’t sure if he could handle her tears. He squeezed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger and took a deep breath.
If he stayed in bed with her any longer, his resolve would crumble. He’d have her on her back and his hands filled with her soft curves before she could blink. Shade carefully slid from beneath her body, settling her head on a pillow, and climbed from the bed.
“Don’t give that schnauzer a flea bath in cottage cheese,” she said and hugged her pillow.
Shade bit his lip to stifle a laugh. Even in her sleep, she made him smile. And warmed his heart. And made part of him wish he could wake up beside her every morning.
Not good.
He watched her for a long moment, her looking all tousled and sexy and unattainable. Even after they’d spent the night together, he still thought of her as beyond his reach. And she should have stayed out of reach. God, he really was an idiot. What in the fuck had he been thinking? He hadn’t. He’d been feeling. Shit, when would he learn to stop doing that? When would he figure out that feelings, any feelings, always led to complications he wasn’t prepared to deal with?
He put on a pair of swim trunks and headed for the pool. There was nothing like an hour of vigorous exercise to get a woman out from under his skin. But he wasn’t even a half a lap down the pool’s length when he realized that busying his body had freed his mind to churn over images of Amanda’s body as he took her, Amanda’s face as he made her come, Amanda’s eyes as she gazed into his soul.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
What was he going to do? He could handle being used for sex—woman used bedding him as some sort of ego trip on a regular basis—but this was Amanda. Amanda. Even though she’d said that she was good with sex for the sake of sex, he didn’t really believe it because for once, he wasn’t okay with it. He couldn’t push her away and forget she existed, because she was already too close. She’d been too close even before her soft lips had brushed his throat and every bit of common sense between them had spontaneously combusted.
After several laps, he stopped at the shallow end of the pool and stared blankly at the blue water. Maybe they could pretend last night had never happened and go back to just being friends. Maybe he could pretend that all they’d shared was physical intimacy.
No, he knew better. It hadn’t been just-sex. Not for him. For him, his time with her had been more. He wasn’t afraid of her getting hurt by a night of unrestrained passion. He was concerned for himself.
He’d just have to deal with these feelings in private. He had to be careful not to hurt her. He didn’t like to hurt the women he cared about, and yeah, he cared about her. He wouldn’t deny it, not to himself. He’d cared for a while now. Even before he’d started to lust after her, he’d known she was special. He liked her as a person first and a woman second. And that was the entire problem.
He didn’t know if she felt anything for him beyond friendship and temporary sexual infatuation, but if she fell for him, he’d eventually end up doing something that hurt her. Something he’d regret. Because when it came to women, he could play them, but he had no idea how to forge a serious and lasting relationship. He was too easily distracted. That’s why he’d sworn off relationships. And it had been a smart move on his part.
So why was he sitting here shivering on the edge of the pool with a full head and an empty heart? He’d just treat Amanda the way he treated all of his lovers—as temporary and exchangeable diversions.
And he hoped like hell she fell for his ruse because if she called him on his bluff, he wouldn’t be able to deny that he thought of her as more than a bedmate. And that, being honest with her about his feelings, was a truly terrifying proposition.
Shade returned to the house and went to the kitchen to ma
ke breakfast. If he started to act unlike himself, she’d figure out that he was hiding something. She was a smart woman and for some reason, she read him like a book. Most people believed his devil-may-care act, but not Amanda.
He’d just finished frying turkey sausage and was adding pancake batter to a hot griddle when she entered the room. She’d borrowed one of his white dress shirts, but her legs were bare. He pretended she wasn’t the sexiest thing he’d ever seen just so he wouldn’t intensify the morning-after awkwardness between them by staring at her. By stalking her across the kitchen By pressing her up against the counter and fucking her senseless again.
“Good morning,” he said. “I hope you’re hungry.”
“Morning. And yes, I’m starving.”
Shade’s belly tightened when Amanda’s hands slipped around his waist from behind.
“I didn’t know you knew how to cook,” she said in a sleep-slurred voice. Her hands roamed his abdomen. “Do your talents know no bounds?”
“I’m sure there’s something I suck at,” he said with a grin.
“I could figure out something for you to suck on.”
He was surprised she was still capable of playful banter; he’d expected her to be embarrassed and ashamed. But he should have known better. Amanda always went with the flow. If she felt any awkwardness at all this morning, she hid it well.
“If you don’t stop coming on to me,” he said, “I’m going to
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