The notion of a fling was getting muddled.
He knelt between my spread legs, shifting his gaze from my sex to my face. His hands clenched.
“What are you waiting for?” I teased my fingers over my mound. As much as I wanted to ride this particular cowboy, I was dying to have him take the lead. Part of my rugged cowboy fantasy. I’d save a horse later.
His eyes followed my hand. Was I too brazen for a guy who’d only hung out with his hand and a tube of lube lately?
Rubbing a hand over his cock, he exhaled hard and leaned on top of me.
I ran my hands over his arms and lifted my head to meet him for a kiss. The tension between us thickened. He had to be nervous. I was. But I had no intention of turning back. I dropped my knees to either side.
The hunger in his kiss demanded total abandon. His tip prodded my entrance.
My body ached to be filled. The slightest rock of my pelvis and his tip slid through my slickness.
Gasps stilled our kiss. He pushed farther and paused, easing his face to the side, seeming to regain his breath.
Grabbing his ass, I worked my hands over his flexing muscles as he inched in and out, not seating himself fully.
I pulled hard, digging my fingernails in. “All the way.”
“Fuck,” he said breathily before slamming into me.
A spasm racked my body as his length secured its position inside of me, pressing against my walls, sating my immediate desire but created a craving. I curled my legs around him, desperate to keep him close, finding an insane need to never let him leave me.
He pistoned in and out, my fingers digging into his back as he picked up his rhythm.
With ragged breaths, I betrayed my promise not to get attached. “I need you.”
He groaned and increased his pace. His breaths matched my loss of control.
The rush of orgasm poured through me in a flash. The slide of his cock in and out became a blur as my walls contracted around him.
The swell of his cock pulled me through waves of bliss before a slight pause then he rammed into me.
I pulled him close with what little coherency I could find.
He lowered himself, pressing me into the blanket.
Between long breaths with sweat chilling our bodies, he dropped his head beside mine.
The only thing keeping me from saying three dangerous words was the bright moon and starlit sky.
Heaven?
Chapter 5
Brandt
Hailey left for New York to visit her mom for a week only because I insisted. For all the time her mom didn’t show any concern over having a daughter, she liked to see her once a year. Must have filled her moral obligation. Since she moved across the country and her rights weren’t terminated, meeting the single request seemed reasonable.
This year her mom had requested Christmas. I'm not sure if that's why Hailey revolted so much, or if she was simply at an age that she wanted to control her own calendar, or if it was all about the blow-up she and her mom had the other day.
Usually the week left me lonely, something I was going to have to deal with in a year and a half when I became an empty nester.
For the first time, that wasn’t the case. Melody gave me something to live for other than my daughter. The fullness in my chest every time I saw her caught me off guard, and I welcomed my time alone with her. Despite knowing she wouldn’t around forever, I was having a harder and harder time accepting it.
With Hailey gone, it was my idea to invite Melody over for dinner. We didn’t have pre-set conversation like before but I could listen to her talk about anything, and since I wanted to know every detail about her life, we had a few things to cover.
How to breach the big issue? The last thing I wanted to do was scare her off, ruin my chances with her before the semester even started.
My nerves were on edge while I waited for her to arrive. I resisted the urge to rub my hands on my pants and clear my throat, not wanting to feed into nervous habits.
The knock on the door elicited a throat clearing and hand rubbing on the pants. This was the first time we would see each other in person since we made love. I hoped it wasn’t just sex to her. I hadn’t been able to keep it superficial. I’d made love to her. All I could do now was try my best not to be awkward about it.
Like sending cattle out to pasture, ya didn’t just call them back in.
I rolled my head side to side and rubbed my hands over my face before reaching for the door handle. I wasn’t completely sure what dating rules dictated but I supposed it was fine to kiss her with the hellos.
Door open. Her rosy cheeks and foggy breath took me straight back to our night in the loft. Melody unhinged me. The week while Hailey was gone would have to serve as my practice sessions for acting normal around Melody. I wasn’t sure it was possible.
Her sweet smile spread ear to ear and she found her voice before I found mine. “Hi.”
“Howdy, come on in.”
She stepped up and entered the house, pausing in front of me, grabbing my shirt, and craning her neck up.
All worry vanished as I lowered my lips to meet hers. The softness of her lips contrasted the demand behind them and we stayed locked for a moment while I cradled my hands around her head.
Her tongue fueled my need to take her again. This time in the bed so I could take my time admiring her body without hurrying to escape the cold.
I pulled my lips away, drawing in a long breath full of her scent. “Unfortunately, the steaks are on the grill.”
“Did you plan that on purpose to make me wait?”
“If I’d have taken that into account, we might have never gotten around to eating.” I swatted her butt, nudging her inside. We were in limbo somewhere between not having been intimate and having been intimate enough to be completely comfortable with each other. I stole glances, mostly so she wouldn’t be creeped out by me staring non-stop, and we gravitated toward touching every chance possible. Even while we ate, our feet and legs brushed each other’s.
I couldn’t comprehend where our relationship stood. According to her, we weren’t going to have a relationship but everything about us felt like one.
Dinner conversation revealed that growing up, she’d hated her name but eventually decided her parents must have had some sort of psychic ability because it ended up being a good fit. Every time she tried to talk about me, I pushed the conversation back to her. I didn’t want my ex-wife to be a topic tonight and she was woven into a big chunk of my life.
It also gave me a chance to make mental notes of all the things Melody missed. Things that were normal in the big city. Food, drinks, opportunities. I could never turn Hopeful into a big city, but I’d do my darndest to fill all the gaps I could.
We’d barely finished eating when the small talk gave way to kisses. Kisses gave way to groping. Groping gave way to sex. In my bed this time.
I made slow sweet love to her, my full attention on present with no thoughts on how long she could be mine. She rested on her back and I rolled onto my side against her when we finished. The eternity of laying with her was everything I needed. Dragging my fingers over her body, memorizing every curve, I wasn’t sure how to ever let her go.
My foot brushed against hers, cold. I reached down and pulled the covers up. “You should have said you needed a blanket.”
“I’m not cold. My feet are always like that. And I like the way you look at me naked.”
So forward, and I would have winced at being called out for staring, but her ease of acceptance only encouraged me. “Don’t go home.”
“What will the neighbors say?” She relaxed her arms over her head, displaying her body.
I kissed a nipple and caressed her stomach. “No neighbors for miles.”
“Mine.”
Was it an excuse? A distancing measure? Or pure logic that school teachers had a special place in small towns. “Do ya wanna go home?”
“How bad is the rumor mill?”
&
nbsp; “You’ve already met Betty.”
“She caught on to us right away. Lost cause, unless you think it’ll be a problem for Hailey.”
I shook my head and rolled onto my back. “I have no idea.”
“Have you really not dated?”
"It was easier not to before you came along."
“So we’re dating?”
“Guess we could make it official. Melody Wilson will—”
She twisted quickly and thrust a hand over my mouth. “Stop. You don’t have to do that.”
Her breasts pressing into my chest and her leg sliding between mine as she quieted me should have held my attention, but I was more curious about why she wouldn’t let me make it official.
A reminder she was leaving and I needed to tame my heart. I’d already given my word.
In the morning when I woke with her by my side, the darkness taunted the possibility I’d been lost in fantasy. Listening to her breaths, I had reassurance she was real.
My internal clock told me it was time to get moving, but the animals were going to have to wait a few more minutes this morning while I enjoyed the simple existence of Melody sleeping peacefully. My morning wood had other ideas, but there was no reason for her to wake up as early as I had to.
She'd told me she'd moved to Hopeful to practice living on a budget and build up a little savings. On a teacher's salary, it would indeed be small. If she moved in with me, us, she could save more. It was too much to suggest, ridiculous in fact, and it would make the end of the semester even harder. The old ladies might be right, men and women spending time alone together led to things. Too late to listen to them now.
I tried to slide out of bed without disturbing her but she stirred and mumbled. Bending to kiss her, I said, “I have to feed the animals and check their water before opening the ice cream shop. Busy morning.”
She stirred again and I pulled the covers tight around her shoulders then flipped extra covers over her feet.
Grabbing clothes, I dressed in the bathroom and headed outside. With Hailey gone, I had to do her chores on top of my own. We had some local kids helping at the shop while they were on winter break, but I needed to get the store open and make sure someone showed up.
When I got back inside from tending the animals, breakfast was made and Melody sent my heart running wild. Without having to cook, I had a few extra minutes to spend with her.
If she didn’t watch it, I’d get used to having another adult in the house. Specifically, an adult who waltzed around in nothing but panties and one of my shirts. And more importantly, one who made me whole again.
All these years, I’d thought I was fine on my own. I’d been wrong. My struggles hadn’t just been occasional loneliness and wishing I had someone to consult on how to raise a teenager. I’d given up on love, pretending to funnel it through my work. No matter how much I loved ranching, it wasn’t the same.
Melody insisted on going home, mostly to pack, suggested she do it alone, and said that she’d be back for dinner. Christmas Eve dinner.
A part of me broke that we weren’t going to spend the entire day together. More distancing? But if she spent the night, I’d wake up with her in my arms on Christmas morning, a gift I wasn’t going to risk by insisting we spend the entire day together.
The rest of the day flew past and I took advantage of a trip into town to pick up Christmas presents for Melody. We hadn’t talked about gifts, and I didn’t want to go overboard, but I wanted to spoil her as much as she spoiled me.
True to her word, she was back for dinner, with her overnight bag in tow.
She made herself at home, playing house, teasing me with fantasies of making her part of my life. And after another evening of excellent food and even better sex, we drifted to sleep.
Christmas morning came, my eyes not even open, and I thanked my lucky stars as I brushed a hand over her soft skin.
But animals had to be tended. I hoped that by preparing ahead and leaving clothes in the bathroom, I could slip out without waking her. No luck.
"Can I help you?" she asked through the darkness before I exited the bedroom.
“Keep the bed warm. I’ll be back.”
I heard the sheets rustling and feet hitting the floor. “You don’t talk much about your life, so you’re going to have to show me.”
“It’s cold out there.”
“I brought warm clothes.” She was at my side flipping the light on, making us both squint under the sudden brightness.
“You don’t have to do this.” Our naked bodies pressed against one another for a hug then she pulled away.
“I want to. Then I want to come back inside and give you your Christmas present. And we better eat a big breakfast because I’m in the mood for Christmas sex, and lots of it. What’s on your agenda today?” She ran her fingers over my arm.
“I second everything you mentioned plus I need to load a round bale into the feeder.”
“One bale?”
“One fourteen-hundred-pound bale.”
“Guess you won’t be doing that by hand.”
“Nope, but I can teach you to run the tractor. There’s an attachment that makes it easy.”
“Will I be an official farm girl if I drive a tractor?”
“Close enough. Get dressed.”
***
Taking care of the animals took longer than normal because Melody was eager to learn everything. We also had to stop so she could catch snowflakes on her tongue and try to inspect the ones that landed on her coat as she tried to look closely to see their pattern before they melted.
It was a perfect morning but I promised I’d teach her more other days because I wanted to spend Christmas Day curled up in front of the fire under the glow of the Christmas tree lights with her.
No objection.
How did she view what we had? Was it all a novelty, just part of her experience of moving to a small town? I shuddered at the possibility everything would end up as fodder for her songs since I learned she didn’t just sing, she wrote too. Could she be faking the chemistry between us?
Those were questions I wasn’t going to ask. I’d live for the moment with her.
Back inside, fresh out of the shower, our bodies still warm and damp, we made love again before I offered to get breakfast ready.
Out of habit, I slipped my jeans on but Melody insisted we wear pajamas. That had to be the first time I’d ever put pajamas on for the daytime. And I couldn’t think of a reason why not to. Anything that would ensure we stayed together.
After breakfast, I pulled two packages out from under the Christmas tree. Melody ran to the bedroom and returned with an oddly shaped one for me.
We sat cross-legged in front of the tree, the light of the morning sun peeking over the mountain, filtering a rosy light into the house, complementing the toasty fire beside us.
I fought back the idea of telling her she was the only present I needed. I fought back an ‘I love you’. Denying myself those admittances was necessary to keep from scaring her off.
Despite our closeness, I didn't have any reason to believe she wanted to stay in Hopeful any longer than she had to. Every time she mentioned the big city, a gleam still flickered in her eyes.
I extended a gift. "I hope you like these."
She opened the first present which I’d made no attempt to hide was a bottle. “Sparkling Margarita! You remembered?”
“You mentioned how much you loved it the other night.”
“Wow, I do. The local store doesn’t have it. They said they couldn’t even order it.”
“I’m aware of that.” I extended the next gift.
She set the bottle aside and tore open the floppy package to find three pairs of fuzzy socks. Her face lit up exactly as I’d hoped.
“To keep your feet warm.”
With the socks gripped in one hand, she thrust her arms around my neck. “You’re so thoughtful. These are perfect, but now you have to open yours.”
I held her ti
ghtly for a moment, cherishing my real gift before letting her slink away. I already feared losing her. Maybe dating occasionally would have been a good idea.
She extended the gift. “Here you go. I’ll consider it Mission Accomplished in Hopeful, Colorado if I can teach you to relax.”
Ouch. I thought I did. But relaxation wasn’t my concern. My chest tightened. Mission Accomplished meant a finish line, moving on. And she’d specifically said Hopeful, Colorado indicating she’d be moving on to somewhere else Her short statement had me re-installing the barrier around my heart.
She must have noticed my surprised expression and grabbed my hand. “You work so hard. The ranch, the ice cream shop, Hailey…I don’t know how you do it.”
Helpful. She confused hard work with not relaxing. Or maybe I was the one who didn’t have it straight.
She nudged a package my way.
I untied the bow and the paper dropped away from the items inside. She’d put together a gift basket. An eclectic mix of things.
Her hands were pulling items out, handing them to me as she explained, “Everything in here helps you relax, scented candles, a loofah so you can get your back for those times you have to shower alone.” She winked.
“Not anytime soon I hope.”
“When Hailey gets back… I don’t think I should stay here.”
I couldn’t argue her point no matter how badly I wanted to.
She frowned then continued handing me items. “Microwave popcorn and gift cards to the movie rental store which I can’t believe Hopeful still has, and massage oil…that’s for me to use on you, or vice versa.”
“Thanks, let me know when you’re ready to try it out.” I pulled my mind back from the six-month mark when she’d disappear from my life, and made a compromise with my heart. Barriers could stay in place while I focused on the moment, enjoying every second I had with Melody. It seemed like one of those unenforceable contracts, but I had to try.
Passionate Wishes Page 4
