THE MANHOOD OF WHY-WHY.
As time went on our hero developed into one of the most admired braves ofhis community. No one was more successful in battle, and it becamealmost a proverb that when Why-Why went on the war-path there was certainto be meat enough and to spare, even for the women. Why-Why, though aRadical, was so far from perfect that he invariably complied with theusages of his time when they seemed rational and useful. If a littletattooing on the arm would have saved men from a horrible disease, hewould have had all the tribe tattooed. He was no bigot. He kept hisword, and paid his debts, for no one was ever very "advanced" all atonce. It was only when the ceremonious or superstitious ideas of his ageand race appeared to him senseless and mischievous that he rebelled, orat least hinted his doubts and misgivings. This course of conduct madehim feared and hated both by the medicine-men, or clerical wizards, andby the old women of the tribe. They naturally tried to take theirrevenge upon him in the usual way.
A charge of heresy, of course, could not well be made, for in the infancyof our race there were neither Courts of Arches nor General Assemblies.But it was always possible to accuse Why-Why of malevolent witchcraft.The medicine-men had not long to wait for an opportunity. An old womandied, as old women will, and every one was asking "Who sent the evilspirit that destroyed poor old Dada?" In Why-Why's time no otherexplanation of natural death by disease or age was entertained. The oldwoman's grave was dug, and all the wizards intently watched for the firstworm or insect that should crawl out of the mould. The head-wizard soondetected a beetle, making, as he alleged, in the direction where Why-Whystood observing the proceedings. The wizard at once denounced our heroas the cause of the old woman's death. To have blenched for a momentwould have been ruin. But Why-Why merely lifted his hand, and in amoment a spear flew from it which pinned his denouncer ignominiously to apine-tree. The funeral of the old woman was promptly converted into afree fight, in which there was more noise than bloodshed. After thisevent the medicine-men left Why-Why to his own courses, and waited for achance of turning public opinion against the sceptic.
The conduct of Why-Why was certainly calculated to outrage allconservative feeling. When on the war-path or in the excitement of thechase he had even been known to address a tribesman by his name, as "OldCow," or "Flying Cloud," or what not, instead of adopting the orthodoxnomenclature of the classificatory system, and saying, "Third cousin bythe mother's side, thrice removed, will you lend me an arrow?" orwhatever it might be. On "tabu-days," once a week, when the rest of thepeople in the cave were all silent, sedentary, and miserable (from somesuperstitious feeling which we can no longer understand), Why-Why wouldwalk about whistling, or would chip his flints or set his nets. He oughtto have been punished with death, but no one cared to interfere with him.
Instead of dancing at the great "corroborees," or religious ballets ofhis people, he would "sit out" with a girl whose sad, romantic historybecame fatally interwoven with his own. In vain the medicine-men assuredhim that Pund-jel, the great spirit, was angry. Why-Why was indifferentto the thunder which was believed to be the voice of Pund-jel. Hisbehaviour at the funeral of a celebrated brave actually caused what wewould call a reformation in burial ceremonies.
It was usual to lay the corpses of the famous dead in a cave, wherecertain of the tribesmen were sent to watch for forty days and nights thedecaying body. This ghastly task was made more severe by the difficultyof obtaining food. Everything that the watchers were allowed to eat wascooked outside the cave with complicated ceremonies. If any part of theritual was omitted, if a drop or a morsel were spilled, the whole ritehad to be done over again from the beginning. This was not all. Thechief medicine-man took a small portion of the meat in a long spoon, andentered the sepulchral cavern. In the dim light he approached one of thewatchers of the dead, danced before him, uttered a mysterious formula ofwords, and made a shot at the hungry man's mouth with a long spoon. Ifthe shot was straight, if the spoon did not touch the lips or nose ormouth, the watcher made ready to receive a fresh spoonful. But if theattempt failed, if the spoon did not go straight to the mark, themourners were obliged to wait till all the cooking ceremonies wereperformed afresh, when the feeding began again.
Now, Why-why was a mourner whom the chief medicine-man was anxious to"spite," as children say, and at the end of three days' watching our herohad not received a morsel of food. The spoon had invariably chanced tomiss him. On the fourth night Why-Why entertained his fellow-watcherswith a harangue on the imbecility of the whole proceeding. He walked outof the cave, kicked the chief medicine-man into a ravine, seized the potfull of meat, brought it back with him, and made a hearty meal. Theother mourners, half dead with fear, expected to see the corpse they were"waking" arise, "girn," and take some horrible revenge. Nothing of thesort occurred, and the burials of the cave dwellers gradually came to bemanaged in a less irksome way.
In the Wrong Paradise, and Other Stories Page 16