Her head high, she stalked through the doors of the restaurant. The host perked his head up, lips parting into a small O. The expression smoothed into a sublime smile as he swung his arm through the air and asked her to follow him.
On the way inside, her confidence and joy had become a fortress around her. When she saw who waited for her, she realized it was a fortress of glass. It shattered and fell away, leaving her bare and empty.
No, she wanted to scream. This wasn’t what I planned. This is wrong.
Just as she’d tricked Nessa, the bitch of a stray cat had pulled one on Monica, too. Her jaw grew tight, the sound of her grinding teeth echoing in her ears while she watched Nikolai Wilder unfold himself from his seat. He was wrapped in a fine suit, looking like a snack, just not the one she’d ordered.
Monica was tempted to turn around and march back to her car when Nikolai took her hand. Holding her gaze, he brought her hand to his lips. The kiss he left was light, but he lingered, smirking to show the sharp teeth in the corner of his mouth. Her heart flipped with the danger of it. He could just as easily bite her and draw blood. It was that thrill that pushed her to sit with him.
“I will say that when Nessa called,” Nikolai began as he laid a napkin over Monica’s lap, “that I was ready to jump at the chance to see the trickster who frustrated me for hours the other day.”
Monica smiled. She couldn’t help it. Dressing as a delivery girl and screwing with Nikolai had been delicious fun. She’d even gotten a massive dildo to put inside the package in case he thought to try opening it.
“You deserved it, and you know it.”
When the waiter came over to take their order, Monica asked for the most expensive dish on the menu. Nikolai raised a brow, but his smirk didn’t falter. Perhaps, he too wanted to try the mocha braised short rib over wild garlic potato puree.
She had to admit, the restaurant he’d chosen was nice. It was high end, everyone around her wearing their finest dresses and suits while the lights above glimmered beneath a glass ceiling. Nikolai had known who Nessa was setting him up with and he’d chosen this restaurant with Monica in mind. She wondered what she’d done to deserve this. What did the Alpha bear of the inland territory see in her that merited such a reward?
With her luck, he probably expected her to pay for her part of the meal. Her stomach tightened, thinking of rent and the dish she’d just ordered. It would definitely put a dent in what she had put away if he asked her to pay for her portion.
Instead of wine, she only asked for a glass of water. Monica didn’t even dare ask for a slice of lemon in case they charged for that, too.
Nikolai sighed, content after the waiter left, and leaned back in his seat.
“Why do you look so happy?” Monica knew her words were challenging, as if because she was annoyed with her situation that he should be, too.
He pressed his eyes shut as if he’d stared into the sun. “Truth be told, after the mess I stirred up, this is a nice respite.”
“So, you chose this restaurant more for yourself. The date was an excuse to get away from your own mess?”
He winced, humor still on his lips. “Ouch. Somebody knows how to hit a man where it hurts.”
“No, only you.” She smiled behind her glass of water.
Nikolai bit his lip and grinned, too. She was caught, for a moment, by the sheer beauty of him. His chin was sharp but softened by the haze of golden scruff that grew over it. Blond hair tied back, all she could see was the bright and piercing color of his blue eyes. Of course, the shape of his shoulders in that suit jacket was nice, too. An image slipped into her mind, of her hands running over the bare surface of those shoulders.
Monica shook her head and grasped for her water again, as if she could drown the thought. What she wanted was Oscar, her Alpha. Not this sad excuse for an Alpha. She’d watched Miles take him down after he’d stolen Lia’s sealskin. Nikolai had been reaching, trying for a power that he didn’t deserve.
When Lia realized his theft of her sealskin held no sway over her, it had been one of the most satisfying moments in Monica’s life. He’d gotten what he deserved. And yet, he still smirked across from her. It was almost as if he was grateful that era had passed. He was a new man.
“You look…” he let his eyes rove over her daring outfit. It certainly stood out in this kind of establishment, showcasing her breasts behind a loose halter top. “You look ravishable.”
Water sloshed over her hand when she started at his words. They cut through her heart, landing past her love for Oscar. She didn’t know what to do, what to say, in response to him. Unable to think, she chose to ignore his words.
“I must thank you for your gift, too!” Nikolai’s eyes held a wild gleam.
“My gift?”
“Oh yes. I believe you remember it. Black silicone. About twelve inches.”
Her face warmed, but she smiled. “Ah, yes. I’m sure you can use it to keep fucking yourself after you fucked yourself stealing Lia’s sealskin.”
His smirk dropped, and just when Monica thought she’d gone too far, Nikolai let out a roaring laugh. He clutched his belly, tears slipping from the corners of his eyes. Everyone in the fancy restaurant turned and looked in their direction. Monica wished she had a menu to hide behind. The wine menu wasn’t big enough.
“I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to have someone say that to my face! My Pack has been stalking around me and glaring for days. When they speak out, it’s nothing more than scathing hatred. I like your way of doing things. I like the hatred painted in humor.”
Monica ducked her head to hide the warmth creeping up her cheeks. As much as she wanted to hate him and this whole situation, Nikolai seemed to bring humor to the table and it was refreshing. She ached to be the wife of the most powerful man she knew, but it wasn’t often that she saw him smile. Monica told herself she loved him because he was strong and just. She wasn’t looking for a life with humor, but righteousness.
Yet, when she looked up again and caught the spark of mischief in Nikolai’s eyes, her stomach flipped. Uncertainty was sour, filling her mouth until her meal arrived.
***
Her dish was as big as a small dog. It took up half the table and the way she looked at it, lips parted and eyes wide in surprise, made Nikolai smile. She was a firecracker, he thought. One that he feared might go off in his hands, but he had no plans to handle her.
Not yet.
Perhaps not ever. It was clear from the moment she entered that she hadn’t been expecting him. The sight of her dismay had been an arrow in his heart, shot down before Cupid could even flit by on his tiny cherubic wings.
He sucked in a breath through his nose, looked down at his own plate, and thought it was probably for the best. A night away from his Pack was nice and had been needed, but he couldn’t stand the thought of inviting her into the mess he’d made for himself. Oscar had a quiet pack. They were well behaved and happy under his rule. Who was he to shake her world by stealing her away?
Still, he watched Monica lift the first bite of her food to her mouth. She groaned and rolled her eyes back. His stomach flipped, his groin stirring. The bear inside him growled happily. It could make her do that, too. It could make her scream their name.
Nikolai swallowed hard and shoved the beast back. He didn’t deserve a woman. Not after what he’d done in the name of his father’s memory. Guilt slapped him in the face and straightened his thoughts.
“What is it?” Monica asked. She’d paused, frozen while she watched him, like a deer in the headlights.
Did she expect him to explode for eating before he started? Did she think she’d messed up and was waiting for him to retaliate? His jaw tightened as he considered what Oscar might have to do to keep the peace among his pack.
Nikolai shook his head. He dug into his food, fighting back the anger that chewed at his insides. No one should live in constant fear of their Alpha. It was a horrid way to live, let alone a horrid way to rule. Nikolai u
sed force on those who asked for it, not on everyone he led.
Silence filled the table, only the soft murmur of other diners and the clink of silverware against china graced the air. It stretched out as they ate, whatever common ground they had vanishing. Nikolai thought himself foolish. This was a mistake. Nessa had called and pressured him into this date, but he could see it for what it was.
An attempt to reach for something he didn’t deserve.
“Okay.” Monica set down her silverware and gave him a flat look, touched with annoyance. “You’re doing it again. You look like someone just bit your dick. What’s wrong?”
He couldn’t help it. A laugh escaped him, a burst of bubbly humor at the simile she’d used. “What did you say?”
“You heard me! Do I smell? Am I chewing with my mouth open? What is bothering you so much?”
He set aside his own silverware and reached for his glass of wine. There was never enough alcohol, never enough for a bear. The wine slipped down his throat and filled his chest with a subtle warmth. He waited for it to go to his head, but it never quite reached.
“It isn’t you. I can promise you that.”
“Then what is it?” Her voice lowered so that it was only a whisper carried on the heat of the candles between them. Surreptitiously, she ducked her head to scent her own armpits.
Again, Nikolai laughed. She was a burst of light in an era of uncertainty and shadows for him. The date might have been a romantic failure, but he would thank Nessa for the opportunity to laugh again. She wouldn’t be happy when he told her he wasn’t looking to continue the match.
“How’s your short rib? It looks delicious.”
Monica’s lips formed a thin line. She narrowed her eyes at him, not at all fooled by his attempt to change the subject. Still, she allowed it. The thin line of her lips opened into a soft smile, demure and dreamy as she looked down at her feast. It was well worth the money if it put that look on her face.
“I’ve never had anything like it. These aren’t flavors I would have thought to put together. Let’s be honest, when my abuela was cooking, I wasn’t hanging around the kitchen like my other cousins.”
Nikolai smiled, ready to ask her where she’d been if she wasn’t with the rest of her cousins, but a commotion stirred at the front door. His heart lurched when he scented shifter on the air. At first, he thought his own Pack had come to ruin the night.
Monica twisted in her seat and cursed when she saw the shifters in the doorway.
“Friends of yours?” Nikolai felt his bear clawing its way to the surface. It roared with devastating anger. Had Oscar sent his beasts to collect Monica before she strayed too far? He would tear Oscar apart, right down to his tendons.
He had to shake his head. The urges of his bear, the desire to protect her by any means, were becoming extreme. The shifters shoved their way toward their table. Before they could cause a scene, Nikolai stood. Monica made a sound of protest, but he bent low and placed a kiss on her cheek.
Nikolai wasn’t about to pick a fight in public. That wasn’t his way. He strode past the other shifters with his head high. Reaching into his jacket pocket, he plucked out his credit card and dropped it onto the host’s pedestal. Monica’s dinner would be taken care of.
He spared one glance back, the shifters having reached Monica’s table. His heart clenched when their eyes met. The disappointment was clear on her face. Even if she hadn’t asked for this date, it had been enjoyable. There would be no goodnight kiss, no chance to invite her inside and steal one night away from the world. All they’d gotten were a few minutes. He would remember it, hold it close and cherish it.
Then, the shifters stole Monica’s attention and the host came back with Nikolai’s receipt. Her meal was paid for, but he owed her one last favor. He happily jingled the keys he’d grabbed from her when he kissed her goodbye. A grin consumed him on his way back to his truck.
Chapter Three
She’d feared the worst.
When she saw the familiar faces in the doorway, her first thought had been of Oscar. Had she angered him with this date? Had it been a betrayal? She couldn’t figure out why Jorge and Red were there. Then, Nikolai had left, and she’d felt bereft. An emptiness echoed inside her, refusing to leave even when she pressed the heel of her hand to her chest.
Turns out someone needed help, a shifter was having a bad night and the Pack was collecting to help them through it. Monica jumped up from her seat and followed her packmates out. The memory of the date sang in the back of her mind, a beacon of light. The night had turned out better than she’d thought. Nikolai was…different.
He was laughter and a vicious playfulness. There was strength in his every movement, in his very being, from his body to his bank account. She had to admit that both were sexy. If the night hadn’t been interrupted, she might have let him invite her inside. Her skin tingled with the thought of his hands on her.
Outside, the night air washed over her and took with it the warm moment they had inside. She let out a sigh and returned to the real world, where she belonged to Oscar—heart and soul.
She approached her car, elbow deep in her purse in search of her keys. They were nowhere to be found. Moments away from shoving her head into the bag to find them, she heard the laughter of one of her packmates. Her head shot up. A fellow shifter pointed at her dashboard.
The black silicone dildo wobbled on her dashboard, standing erect for the world to see. On her window was a note. She stomped forward, heels clicking angrily against the pavement, and snatched it.
I thought you might want this back.
Have fun getting home tonight.
Love,
Nik
She sucked her teeth. It should have been annoying, a boundary overstepped, but Monica laughed. The panther inside her rose and slithered across her skin. It found this kind of funny, too.
“Got room in your truck for me?”
“Only if you’re willing to sit in the truck bed.” Her packmate shook his head, still laughing at the giant dildo suction-cupped to her dashboard. “This is what you get for screwing around with other packs. I swear we’re the only civilized ones around here.”
Monica didn’t say anything. How could she admit that this date was the most fun she’d had in…years? They wouldn’t understand, so there was no point in even trying. She jumped into the back of Jorge’s truck, annoyed that her faux-leather pants might end up with oil stains by the end of the night.
The trek to Pilar’s house was quick, the pedal to the metal for a fellow shifter. Nearly half the Pack congregated in Pilar’s living room. Monica could see the trouble in Pilar’s eyes, the urge to do bad things. The Pack had answered her call, staging an all-nighter.
Oscar was nowhere to be found, perhaps still holed up in the house that needed repairs because of Lia’s rage. The selkie had destroyed all of his living room windows, after all. Monica tried not to feel the disappointment, choosing instead to retreat. Unable to stand the voices and the expectation to participate in the sleep-over conversation, she snuck away to shift.
She returned on four black paws. Her mind was filled with a replay of the night. It consumed her more than she would have liked to admit. Quietly, in her own world while her head lay in Pilar’s lap, she planned her revenge on Nikolai.
Of course, it involved the black silicone dildo.
***
The night was as long as the date had been short. Nikolai arrived home to his Pack rioting. For a long moment, he sat in the cabin of his truck and practiced breathing exercises. Nothing worked. Not while he watched fires burning in his yard and shifters tossing each other around like a pack of barbarians.
Why had his father wanted to give them anything? He couldn’t understand it. They seemed to be a bunch of selfish assholes at best. If anything, Nikolai suspected his father wanted more territory so that he could keep the shifters away from one another.
Once he finally accepted there was no way to calm the fury inside him,
he jumped out of his truck. He filled his voice with the power of an Alpha and commanded the fires be put out. Bodies jerked into motion, dumping water or sand onto the bonfires. He hated having to use the power of compulsion, but they needed it.
They asked for it.
Guilt weighed heavy in his throat, a lump he couldn’t swallow. Several shifters approached him, all male and all swaggering. He sighed. They were barbarians, all the way down to their rotten souls. It was no wonder that Nikolai preferred being alone in the middle of nowhere.
“Is this a witch hunt? Is that what the fires were for?” Nikolai raised a brow, trying to be the picture of cool indifference while his bear begged to tear their faces off.
“This is a coup, old man.” One of the shifters stepped forward, swinging his arms as if he could scare Nikolai off with them alone.
“Is that how this is going to be?”
He liked this suit. It was a shame, but he let his bear rip forward. The suit tore and burst, the sound of growls and ripping fabric filling his ears. He struck down the first shifter with his massive paws. It knocked the man out cold and he dropped to the ground.
The others weren’t that bright. Perhaps that was why they did what they did. Nikolai fought his way through them until his bear was heaving for breath. His paws curled, claws flexing. Blood covered his fur, smeared the faces of his shifters.
None of them were dead, but he hoped they would have the worst fight hangover in the morning. He hoped their heads ached and their limbs trembled when they thought of challenging him again. It was the least they deserved for looking like a bunch of witch-hunters on his front lawn.
“When are you going to do anything more than knock us to the ground?”
Nikolai’s bear looked up. A female shifter looked at him with her eyes glowing against the night, moons brought down to earth. Her hands were fisted at her sides, massive like the rest of her. She was strong and capable, one of the shifters Nikolai normally admired.
Her True Alpha Mate Page 2
