“I slept with someone while we were apart,” Ivy said shivering in fear. “I thought that when you left me, it was over for good. When you came back, I didn’t know how to tell you. I’m so sorry.” She began to cry as she watched Grey’s face turn cold and stoic. Looking through her or past her, he stood silent for a moment blocking out the sound of her painful sobs.
“So, you’re crying because you cheated on me?” The very thought was preposterous to him. “Or are you crying because you’re pregnant?” Surely, it couldn’t be both.
“Grey, I’m so sorry,” she said reaching for his hand.
“Are you crying because you’re pregnant or because you cheated on me?” He bagged away.
“Because I don’t know who the father of this child is and I’m already through my first trimester.” A final tear fell to her cheek as she tried to stand tall. Her very act was revolting enough; there was no room for self-pity, but she overflowed with it.
Bitch!!! Grey thought to himself as he wiped the tears from his face. He turned away and looked up the moon glaring down on him, laughing at him. He could no longer feel the bone-wrenching cold winds. He could no longer hear his fiancée sobbing. All could he could do was allow the tears to fall. He wanted to double over and die. He wanted to scream and shout and…he wanted to kill the bastard that had touched her! He tried to stop the tears as they flowed freely down his cheeks. Sniffling he turned around to try and tolerate the sight of this woman in front of him. Who was she, and what had she done with his Ivy?
It was far too much for Ivy to bear. The sheer weight of her burden caused her to crumble down into the snow at the base of his feet. Her hair glimmered like black silk. Trying to hide her face, she held on to his leg.
Coming back to present situation from the distant thoughts in the back of his mind, Grey looked down at Ivy and felt a surge of both anger and empathy.
“Get up,” he said picking her up out of the snow.
“Please. Please forgive me,” Ivy said holding on to Grey’s jacket. “I’m so sorry.”
“Just answer me this. How can you smile in face, be with my family, make love to me, knowing that you had betrayed my trust?” His voice was distant and solemn.
“I didn’t think ever in a million years that this would happen.” She looked down in the snow again unable to make eye contact with him.
“I can’t believe you.” Grey turned away and took a deep breath. He was starting to get a migraine.
“Grey...”
“Don’t say another word to me,” Grey said turning back around. “Not one more word.” His soft brown lips curved around his demand.
Instantly obeying, Ivy silenced her pleas and proceeded out of the garden to the back porch. Grey followed her distantly with his fists balled tightly down in his coat pockets. Getting to the door, Ivy stopped and turned around. She couldn’t just go back in to the house. There would be too many questions, too many stares.
“Could you please just take me home?” Ivy asked in a near whisper.
“We’re going to finish this conversation inside,” he said finally realizing how cold Ivy must have been. “Then, I’ll take you wherever the hell you want to go.”
They entered through the back door into the kitchen and took off their coats. Ivy sat at one end of the kitchen table, and Grey sat at the other. For a moment, she wondered if the distance would be too much to keep other guests in near by rooms or in the hallway from hearing their conversation, but then she also knew the distance would be just enough to keep Grey from her while he was at one of his angriest points.
“Let’s talk about this guy,” Grey said placing both of his elbows on the table and clasping his hands together.
“Why do we have to talk about him tonight?” Ivy wished the entire situation had been put on hold until after the holidays. After this, she would never see Christmas quite the same.
“Him? Who is he?” Grey slowly took off his black leather gloves. “Wait. Let me guess, a college friend of yours. One of your little fraternity friends maybe?” Sarcasm laced Grey’s voice.
“No,” Ivy said glad that at least her selection was not obvious. “He’s a police officer.”
“What? A cop? You went and got knocked up by a city employee?” His manner was turning facetious. “I don’t believe this shit. And where did you meet him on a routine traffic stop or at Starbucks?” Grey smirked.
Ivy stared at him for a moment and became sickened. He was in no position to treat her like she was the enemy. The entire situation came along because of his insecurities.
“No, I didn’t meet him on a routine traffic stop or at Starbucks. And he’s not some bum. He’s a really a successful and determined man. We met at a party with Trina.” Ivy stared into his eyes.
“Oh, it gets even better! Now your cheap, slutty-ass roommate is involved.” Grey hated Trina more than any of Ivy’s friends. “Go on…tell me the story.”
“She’s not a slut.” Ivy insisted.
“Well, forget I said that okay,” Grey forfeited his early statements. “Let’s focus on the stake and not the peas. Pretend that I am one of your girlfriends. Tell me what you would tell them about how you ended up in bed with Shaft.”
“Grey!” she begged distressingly.
“Enough with the theatrics. Just tell me.” Grey’s voice rose slightly.
“We met at a party that her boyfriend was throwing. He called me a few days later. We went out on a date and ended up back at his place. Before long, things got out of control. Alright.”
“Alright? No, it’s not alright! Those aren’t specifics. I want to know from beginning to end what happened. I want to understand how this man ended up between your legs.”
Ivy looked at Grey all tongue in cheek. He had only one intention and that was to make her feel as guilty and dirty as possible for her actions. But he needn’t help her much. She already felt a world of shame. Besides, he didn’t really care to hear the details. No man did. They would always demand to hear everything and accept nothing. No, she wouldn’t allow that game to be played.
“I won’t tell you specifics, Grey. It isn’t right. I will tell you, though, that it was a one-time thing. And I am truly sorry that I did not tell you before.”
“What is his name?” Grey said ignoring her temperament. “I want to know his name.” He hit the table.
“Nicola,” Ivy sighed.
“Nicola? Did his mother feel sympathetic to another culture?” Grey asked restructuring the picture of the mystery man that lingered in the back of his mind.
“Well, he’s not Black if that’s what you mean.” Ivy didn’t see the point.
Nothing more could have surprised Grey more. He sat stupefied gazing blankly at the woman that he proclaimed to love and realized that he just might not know her at all.
“Then what is he, if he isn’t Black?” The name kept ringing over and over again in Grey’s head. Where did he know this name from?”
“He’s Italian.”
“You went and found an Italian cop to fuck.” He shook his head. “You are just full of surprises.” Outwardly, he laughed at her, trying to make her feel as small as he did. Inwardly, he wanted to peel out of his own skin.
“I don’t see what his race has to do with anything. In fact, I don’t see where this is going. What I want to know is where does this situation put us? What now?” Ivy folded her arms and shook her head. She wasn’t about to beg him anymore more. He didn’t deserve it. And the more she thought about it, the more the entire situation infuriated her.
“I don’t know what’s next. I’m too focused on you and your lover boy right now.” Grey thought back to all the women that he could have gotten pregnant on a common one night stand and instantly felt compelled to ease up on his judgment of Ivy. “If this is his child, I am supposed to just step in and clean up his mess, raise his seed like the faithful field slave tending to the master’s house nigga?”
Ivy could barely stomach his insolence. How dare he!
“No, you’re not left to do anything. It was me that made every decision that has lead me to this point, and it will be me that will stand responsible for every action and reaction. I don’t expect or want anything from you! And I can’t say that enough.”
“I hope like hell you don’t want anything from me!” Grey tried to get his bearing.
Ivy replied with a nasty snarl.
Grey ignored her. “And then the other question is if it’s mine what am I to do? Allow you to walk around with a bastard child and child support check. Is that supposed to be enough?” Where would this put him during election time? The polls would be against him. He couldn’t allow that to happen.
“That would be enough. I am more than capable of raising this child on my own,” she said grinding her teeth.
“Could you please act your age for two seconds. Of course it is not enough.” His voice raised slightly, but not enough to be heard for fear that it might bring to much attention from the guests in the house. He thought carefully for a moment weighing every option and occasionally thanking God that the shoe was not on the other foot. Then in a deep solemn voice he spoke glaring into her wide eyes with new control.
“Is it really over with this guy?”
“Yes.” Ivy looked up from her headache and stared him in his eyes.
“Do you still have feelings for him?” For Grey, it was the million-dollar question.
“I never had feelings for him.” Ivy lied but she saw no reason for telling him the truth about something that didn’t matter. “I was lonely and desperate…a feeling I hope that you never experience.”
There was some comfort in Grey’s mind now. He could believe that her cop friend meant nothing as long as she believed that he had never been unfaithful. It still gave him the upper hand, a better one in fact. And he planned to use it for as long as possible.
“As much as I would like to deny that I have any feelings for you, I still love you very much. And I wish that all of this had never happened. But this does change things dramatically. There is so much to clean up behind a scandal like this. I don’t know where to begin.” But he did. He would start with his own dirty conscious.
“We should just call off the wedding,” Ivy said wiping the tears from her tired eyes.
“Why? Are you finished with me?” Grey didn’t want her to begin to fight back. He wanted her to submit fully to his entire plan. It was the only way he was sure that it would work.
“No, I’m not finished with you. But this is just too much.”
“You let me worry about the specifics. Just focus on finishing school and maintaining your sanity around town. Unless we find out for certain that this child is his, we will act as though this never happened. I mean, there is no since of making me look like a fool for no reason.”
“Damn it, Grey. No one is trying to make you look like a fool! Everything isn’t about you!” She forgot herself in the middle of her emotions.
“Like it or not, when you took me back, you made it about me. And lower you damned voice in this house. Do not disrespect my family.”
“I’m sorry,” she said sobbing lightly. “But don’t you disrespect me either.”
“If the child is mine then we have nothing more to worry about. We will write it off as simple but very stupid mistake. And if it is his, whoever he is, I will accept his child as my own only if he steps back completely. I won’t go into my marriage with my wife bound to another man by a child or anything else. He will have to cut all his ties.” Now Grey could prove to everyone that Ivy wasn’t perfect and shift some the guilt of infidelity off of his shoulders.
“What if he doesn’t want to?” Ivy asked appalled at his demands.
“Some how, I don’t think that he’ll mind,” Grey said rolling his eyes.
“I didn’t go out and sleep with the first asshole that would have me. He’s not the type to just shove his responsibilities off on you. Besides, you speak as though I am asking or begging even for you to marry me.” There was little if any room for misinterpretation. “Well, I’m not.”
“Oh, I know that you are not. You’re as stubborn as I am, but I still am laying down my side of the agreement. Take it or leave Ivy, because like it or not you were dead wrong.” His thoughts drifted back to his recent affairs.
“Yes, I was wrong. I will admit that, but the truth of the matter is that so were you for dropping me like a bad habit. I didn’t cheat. We weren’t together, or did you forget. I just failed to inform you as to what I had done during our break up…”
“Which,” Grey interrupted, “could have killed me if the man had had HIV or some other God forsaken disease.” There was a silence in the room. “Thank God he only left you with his possible seed and a stained name,” he stood up from his chair and walked briskly passed her. “Get your things we’re leaving. You don’t deserve to be here.”
“I am not stained,” Ivy said shaking her head emphatically.
“Aren’t you?” he turned around to meet her face to face. “You were as pure as any man could hope for, and then like a fool you let him touch you. Unprotected! What in the hell were you thinking?”
“I didn’t let him. We used protection. It must have slipped or something.” She turned away from him in shame.
“Protection? If you were really interested in protecting yourself you wouldn’t have thrown your legs open and invited him in. Don’t try to justify this bullshit, and don’t ever bring up how you may have gotten pregnant by him again. I’m quite sure that I know how these things happen. Now, grab your things. I want you out of my family’s house.” Turning away, Grey walked out of the kitchen door and left her standing in sheer humility.
Book Two
Chapter Nine: Happy New Year!
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Chapter 9
Happy New Year!
Ivy had decided the day after the Grey’s Christmas party that she needed to get her own apartment and within days signed a lease with an apartment complex in Cordova not far from her mother’s home. This would be a counter move just in case she didn’t marry Grey in the summer. Plus, she still needed a place for the baby once he or she arrived. As a favor to Ivy’s current state, Trina moved also to provide support both financially and mentally.
Much to her surprise, Ivy had not spoken to Grey in nearly a week. He had text messaged her to make sure that she was physically well, but refused to speak with her personally for fear that his anger might overcome him.
Nicola had been missing in action, too. He had not called once since he left her dorm room the morning after his discovery of the child. She wasn’t sure if the lack of communication from the men was good or bad, but she used to time to prepare herself for the next hurdle of her life, which was telling her parents.
There was, however, a small sentiment of pride that she was moving forward without approval. Moving out of the dorms into an apartment was a decision that she had made on her own, using her own resources. For once, she was taking charge of her life and leaving little room for suggestions.
As Ivy pulled into the Registry at Cordova apartment complex, her cell phone vibrated on her hip. Debating whether or not to answer it, she looked at the caller ID. It was Nicola of all people. Without explanation, her heart began to flutter.
“Hello?” Ivy said turning down her radio.
“Hey. Happy New Year,” Nicola said in reasonably good spirits.
“Happy New Year to you, too,” Ivy said happy to hear his voice.
“Uh, I was just calling to see how you were. I know that it’s been a minute since you’ve heard from me.”
“Yeah.” Ivy pulled into her parking spot and turned off her car. “I’m fine. Just in the process of moving.” She was proud of her accomplishment and couldn’t wait to share the news with him. “What have you been up to?”
“Nothing much. I’m just leaving a bust in South Memphis and…moving? Where to?” His first guess was her fiancé’s house. Such a decision would surely make it more difficult for their
already overly complicated situation.
“Trina and I have our own place in Cordova now. It’s at the Registry at Woodhaven.”
“Huh.” He was impressed with her selection. “Yeah, that’s a nice neighborhood. Congratulations.”
“Thanks,” she said smiling. “It’s not exactly the most exciting New Year’s Eve plans, but I’m happy. I’m surprised that Brooks didn’t tell you.”
“He tends to forget anything that isn’t about him. Well, do you need some help? I know with the baby you can’t do a lot of moving.” There was a strange and awkward silence as Nicola tried to move past his first recognition of the pregnancy as a form of life.
“No, thanks though. For the most part, the movers took care of everything yesterday. Trina is going to take care of everything else.” Ivy tensed up as well when she thought about the word baby. She was actually going to be a mother. Oh, God.
“Alright.” Even as long as Nicola had waited to call he had absolutely nothing to say to Ivy. There was always an awkwardness about their situation he could not get over. He wasn’t ready for fatherhood. He wasn’t ready for responsibility. He wasn’t ready for Ivy!
“Hello?” Ivy said hoping that she had not lost her signal.
“I’m here. Um, you can call me at any time day or night if you need me,” Nicola said taking a long, deep breath and trying to calm his silent panic attack. .
“Thanks, again,” Ivy said hearing his familiar voice of concern.
“Alright then.” Nicola felt as though he had said more than enough. “I better get back to doing what it is that I do.”
“Alright. Talk with you later,” Ivy said softly as she hung up the phone.
“Who was that?” Trina asked standing at the car door while Ivy finished her conversation.
“Nicola. He just wanted to know how the baby and I were doing.” Ivy got out of the car and smiled.
“Alright now,” Trina said shaking her head. “Don’t forget your bargain with Grey.”
Ivy's Twisted Vine Redux Page 15
