by Aidan Wayne
Sam Doyle: It IS important to me. I’m sorry.
Dovid Rosenstein: No, it’s okay. It’s okay. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, like, come off all aggressive. That wasn’t aimed at you. I’m just, I don’t know, mad on your behalf.
Sam Doyle: But why?
Dovid Rosenstein: Because it sounds like someone, at some point, told you you weren’t attractive. And that’s just not true. Even if I cared about looks (which, surprise, I don’t), I’m already attracted to you. Just because of who you are. I’m attracted to you, so you’re attractive. Boom. Done.
Dovid Rosenstein: ... Sorry, I didn’t mean to get weird on you.
Sam Doyle: No, ah, that was beautiful. It’s a little odd to hear it being said about me, but thank you. I mean it.
Dovid Rosenstein: How about I just keep telling you that until you get used to it :)
Sam Doyle: I’m blushing right now, so you know.
Dovid Rosenstein: Yeah? Oh, oh, you’re a redhead—does that mean your blushes stand out more? Do your cheeks go all hot when you blush? I need to know this. For science.
Sam Doyle: I never thought about it. I... I suppose it’s fairly obvious when I blush, yes. I get all red. It’s very embarrassing.
Dovid Rosenstein: Nooo, don’t be embarrassed! It’s cute.
Sam Doyle: Haha, if you say so.
Dovid Rosenstein: I mean it. You’re so cute. I kind of want to kiss your whole face.
Then he cursed. Idiot.
Dovid Rosenstein: But like, only consensual kissing, duh. And it’s cool if you don’t like kissing! I’m also big on holding hands. And hugs. I’m kind of hugely tactile? But if you’re not that’s okay too. And I guess it doesn’t really matter a whole bunch right now considering we’re a continent apart. Just, whatever you want and are comfortable with. Seriously, I’ll be happy enough just talking to you.
Which was another example of just how much Dovid liked Sam. Because he was hugely tactile (and very sexual). But if Sam wasn’t...
For Sam, Dovid would take that and be okay.
Fuck, he was so in love.
Dovid Rosenstein: Sorry, went a bit on a ramble there, haha. Feel free to ignore me.
Sam Doyle: No, no! Sorry I might have gotten stuck there, a little. I’m not entirely sure how to respond.
Sam Doyle: Also I’m blushing quite a lot now, I think.
Dovid Rosenstein: Hey, hey, it’s okay. If you don’t have anything to say, or don’t know what to say, or don’t want to say anything, that’s cool. I just wanted to lay my cards on the table. Again, not that it matters super much right now but uh. I’m thinking that maybe, in the long-term, we’d meet up.
Sam Doyle: Oh, that would be wonderful!
Sam Doyle: I’d like to think we would be long-term too.
Sam Doyle: And I...about the rest of it. Um.
Dovid Rosenstein: It’s alright, really. You don’t have to say anything.
Sam Doyle: I want to though. I’m just unsure as to how to phrase it. But I suppose just coming out with it is the best thing to do.
Dovid Rosenstein: I’m all ears, whatever you want to say.
It took almost three minutes before Sam’s next message came through.
Sam Doyle: I, um, I haven’t done very much at all, I’m afraid. I don’t have a lot of experience at all, really. And I know you do, that you’ve said as much in your videos. And that that’s important to you in a relationship. And so I admit that I’m just, you know, wondering a little bit about how not to be a disappointment in the event we do meet up, because that’s the last thing I’d want to be.
Oh. Wow.
There was a lot to extrapolate from that.
But first off, he wanted to nip something in the bud.
Dovid Rosenstein: Okay, one, that is not a disappointment. That would never be a disappointment. YOU are not a disappointment, no matter what your experience is. All that means is we’d get to experiment and figure out what you’d like :)
Dovid Rosenstein: If you like anything at all. And if you don’t, that’s okay too.
Sam Doyle: No, well, I, I do like holding hands. (Goodness that sounds so childish to say.)
Dovid Rosenstein: Hey no. It’s sweet. And that can be really intimate.
Dovid Rosenstein: I pretty much like all physical contact. I’d really like to hold your hand :)
Sam Doyle: You are not making this blushing business any better, I hope you know.
Dovid Rosenstein: :) :) :)
Dovid Rosenstein: But seriously, that’s a good place to start. Whatever comes after—IF anything comes after—you don’t have to worry about that now.
Sam Doyle: Thank you.
Dovid Rosenstein: Of course.
Sam Doyle: I think I’d like to, you know.
Dovid Rosenstein: Like to what?
Sam Doyle: Kiss you.
Dovid bit his lip and tried to keep his breathing even.
Dovid Rosenstein: Well then. One day we’ll figure out how to make that happen.
* * *
Dovid Rosenstein: Are you still awake?
Sam Doyle: Yes.
Dovid Rosenstein: Could I call?
Sam Doyle: Please do :)
“Hey you,” Dovid said quietly, once Sam picked up the phone. “Sorry I called so late.”
“It’s okay,” Sam replied. “I wasn’t asleep yet, just—”
“Reading?”
Sam laughed. “I’m not going to change anytime soon, am I?”
“Please don’t. I like you.”
“Well then. I’ll endeavor to keep at it. Anyway, how did filming go?”
“Pretty good. We decided to do the food truck tour. What with the weather getting warmer, more of them are out. Rachel and I ate so much food. Rachel’s coma-ing it out while I talk to you. We’ll be hitting the editing hard in an hour or so.”
“So I get you for a whole hour?”
“How about you get me until you fall asleep. It’s eleven-thirty for you, right?”
“Maybe.”
“Sam, you need to be going to bed earlier. You always say you’re wiped in the morning.”
“But if I go to bed earlier, sometimes I miss talking to you,” Sam pointed out. “You can’t always be free at eleven in the morning. It’s the middle of the day for you.”
Dovid sounded decidedly grumpy when he said, “I’d make the time.”
“Oh stop, that’s not fair to you. If I weren’t talking to you on the phone, I’d be up just as late reading anyway. And, frankly, you’re more important to me than a book, no matter how exciting it is.”
“Aw.”
Sam smiled. “You know I mean it.”
A sigh. “Yeah. How are your ribs doing today?”
“Much better! I’m only taking my pain medication to sleep now, because lying down still hurts. But they’re well on their way to being fully healed. They barely bother me at work, sitting at my desk.”
“I’m glad.”
Sam chuckled. “Me too, believe me. So that’s what your plan is for the rest of the day? Editing?”
“Mm-hm. Though a nap might be in order for me too, honestly.”
“Oh dear, why are you so tired?”
“Just woke up early after a late night, is all. Sometimes my body hates me.” Right, Dovid had mentioned that once in a while he just woke up really early for no reason, and nothing could get him to fall back asleep again. He mostly dealt with it by taking naps.
“Well then, you’ve certainly deserved a nap too,” Sam said.
“Can I tell you something?”
“Of course.”
“I took a leaf out of your book; I’m already in bed.”
Sam grinned. “So if we close our eyes, we can just imagine we’re lying next to each other.”
/> There was a quiet gasp, followed by a shaky, “Y-yeah. Yeah, we could. And I don’t even have to close my eyes.”
“There you go,” Sam said softly. The conversation felt light and easy, but with a distinct sleepy haze. Intimate, in a way yesterday’s more awake conversation wasn’t. “I’m just there, right next to you.”
Another gasp. “Yeah?”
“Mm-hm.” Alighting on an idea, he added, “You can feel it, can’t you? Me reaching out to touch you?”
There was a sharp intake of breath. “Wh-where?”
“Your cheek, I think. Just softly. And then your arm, so you could feel I was there.”
A noise that sounded like a whimper. “Then what?”
Sam thought about it. “I think I’d curl my fingers around yours. Pull in you close. I’d—I’d like to hold you.”
“Fuck,” Dovid whispered in Sam’s ear.
Pleased, he continued. “You’d like that? Like me holding you?”
“Sam.” The word sounded punched out. “Fuck, Sam, yes. So much.”
“We’d fall asleep like that,” Sam murmured. “Wrapped around each other. I’d press a kiss to your hair before we both drifted off.”
A quiet sound, almost a sob. “I wish you were really here.”
Sam stared up at his ceiling. He could picture it; holding Dovid close. His long limbs would actually be good for something, being able to wrap around the man he loved. Besides, touching meant so much to Dovid, and Sam only wanted to give him everything he could. “So do I.”
Chapter Eight
“Hey!” Dovid said, when he answered his phone. “What’s up?” He sounded a little breathless. Sam tried to push down feeling guilty at having interrupted something. If Dovid had been too busy to answer Sam’s call, he wouldn’t have done so.
“Nothing much,” Sam told him, feeling a bit shy. “I just wanted to say hello.” He’d been trying to think more, lately, about what he could do and offer on his end. They were already so far apart it was difficult to come up with ideas aside from sending mail, but Dovid enjoyed talking with him, and of course Sam did too, and thinking back over their conversations, Dovid started quite a lot of them.
So Sam had decided to reach out more often. He loved talking to Dovid anyway, so it wasn’t exactly a hardship. Especially since he knew he wasn’t being a bother. Dovid loved talking to Sam just as much. Had, in fact, made it quite clear.
It was very nice, to know that.
It made Sam feel brave.
“I’m so not complaining about you calling me just to say hi,” Dovid said, sounding like he was grinning.
“What were you up to?”
“Just finishing up exercising. I slept in today, so I’ve been moving a little slower than usual.”
Sam frowned, concerned. “Did you have more trouble sleeping?”
“Nah, just the opposite. I think, you know, my body was just trying to catch up on some sleep that I’ve been missing.”
“Oh. Alright. I’m glad you were able to get some more sleep in, then.”
Dovid chuckled. “Thanks. How was work? Not too bad today, I hope?”
“Oh, it was fine,” Sam said lightly.
“Sam.”
“I just mean, ah, it was only the usual sort of awful. Nothing out of the ordinary.”
A sigh. “You have no idea how often I wish you were able to say ‘good’ and not be lying about it.”
“It’s alright,” Sam tried to assure him. “I get through it, and then I come home. It’s not so bad.”
It was funny though, how it had been getting harder lately. Before Sam had met Dovid, he was content to come home to his books and games. He dreaded getting out of bed, and possibly avoided going to sleep because it meant morning—and thus work—would be coming sooner, but it was tolerable enough. What else would he be doing with his life, after all?
Now he couldn’t help but spend the time at work wishing he were doing other things, because he had other things to do. Planning ideas for his channel, making more videos, talking to Dovid. He’d become a lot more active on Twitter, and even was doing a little more fan interaction.
It was just something else that had been on his mind.
* * *
“Dovid,” Rachel said, knocking on his door, “Dovid, did you check your email in the last ten minutes?”
“Um, no?” He didn’t lift his head. “I’ve been making another song for our video? Why would I be checking my email?”
“Because it’s important.”
“And? Care to elaborate?”
“Okay, so you know how we did that tour last year, across America?”
“Yeah...” They’d hit LA, Dallas, Chicago, Detroit, and Boston. It’d been a whirlwind of traveling and plane trips, Airbnbs and reviews, and videos. Editing it all had taken them ages, and that was with trying to release a couple videos on the actual road. “Why?”
“Airbnb offered the same type of package again, for a Europe tour.”
Dovid shot to his feet. “Excuse me?”
“You. Me. Expenses paid Europe tour. In a month, for two weeks.”
“Are you shitting me right now?”
“Are you kidding? Do you even know how excited I am? Do you know how much stuff we’ll get to see? And do? And eat?”
Dovid turned to her, mind whirling, already planning out videos in his head. “What are the stops?”
“Norway for three days, Germany for two, France for two, England for three, Ireland for two. I’m not sure about the exact order but—”
“Hold up,” Dovid said, freezing. “Ireland?”
The grin he heard in Rachel’s voice was wicked. “You heard me.”
“What—when?”
“July. So just under a month. Think that’s enough time to plan things out with Sam? I bet we could swing it to make Ireland our last stop. Maybe stay a few extra days, if we spring for the return trips and the Airbnb ourselves...”
Dovid could have kissed her. “You are a genius and I love you.”
“I know, but feel free to remind me.”
“Okay, okay. We’ve got to figure out a plan, get the full itinerary, see what they want from us in terms of plugs, start scheduling meetups and meetup locations...”
“I’m already in the living room with my laptop and a notebook. Come on.”
Dovid followed her out of his room.
* * *
Dovid Rosenstein: You are not going to believe this.
Sam Doyle: What is it?
Dovid Rosenstein: I’m coming to Ireland in July.
Sam Doyle: Oh my goodness! Really??
Dovid Rosenstein: Told you you weren’t going to believe it. But yeah—Rachel and I get sponsor videos every so often. Some are pretty standard, like reviewing a restaurant or a blind box, but others are bigger. Airbnb sponsored us to go on a tour last September, for meetups and room reviews and stuff, and they sometimes do “Spend a week in such-and-such” deals. It looks like they want us to do another tour, but for Europe this time.
Dovid Rosenstein: Ireland is our last stop too. So even though we’re only supposed to stay there for a couple days with our hosts, Rachel and I could extend our stay. Make some more videos there.
Dovid Rosenstein: Give me more time to spend with you. If you wanted.
Sam Doyle: Dovid, of course I want to. Do you know what dates yet? I could come to your meetup and then...maybe we could spend time together after. Depending how long you stayed.
Dovid Rosenstein: For Ireland we’re flying in Tuesday night, going out to dinner with our hosts, the meetup Wednesday evening after an Ireland day, having another Ireland Day Thursday, and then flying out Friday morning. But Rachel and I were thinking that we could stay through the weekend instead and leave Monday. Maybe...maybe longer, but I know you work and I don’t w
ant to have you try to take days off if that would cause trouble for you.
Sam Doyle: No, no, I could try to get Monday and Tuesday off. It’s still a month in advance. I don’t know if I’d be able to get it, since I was already out a week with my ribs, but I would absolutely ask.
Sam Doyle: It’d be worth it, to me. After all, it’d be my first time actually getting to meet you in person. That’s a big deal! And I’d want it to last as long as it can.
Dovid Rosenstein: Yeah, me too.
* * *
“Hey, guys, this is Don’t Look Now, with Dovid and Rachel. I’m Dovid, Rachel’s behind the camera, and today we’re going to be talking to you about our video tour!”
Dovid grinned wide and sat back in his chair. “Airbnb has been kind enough to sponsor a trip to Europe. Yeah, I know, right? If some of you remember, we went before a couple of years ago for that conference thing in Sweden, but this time we’re doing a full out-and-out stay at a bunch of different places. We’ll be talking about where we stay, all the food we’re going to eat, and, of course, accessibility while traveling. Not to mention that we’re going to have an official meetup at every place we go.”
He went on to talk about the stops on the trip, the places for the meetup and meetup dates. “All the information is also going to go up on our website, and that’s where you can buy tickets to each meetup. As always, half the proceeds of ticket sales goes to charity, and the charity we’re supporting this trip is the Hadley Institute. We’re looking forward to seeing you all! Well. Sort of seeing, duh.”
“Vid.”
“Rachel.”
“If you’re allowed to make the same dumb jokes twelve million times, I’m allowed to make mine.”
Dovid sighed. “Anyway, stay tuned for more information about the trip and videos of us getting ready—because I know you like our packing videos. I am so excited to visit Europe again, and to meet all of you. Of course, we’re going to be making videos the entire time we’re there, and will try to release at least one or two depending on how jet-lagged we are. Anyway, don’t forget to follow Don’t Look Now on social media—links in the description box below. And as always guys, see you later! Well, I won’t, but you know what I mean.”
