by Zig Ziglar
What Mother had done was extremely wise. She had criticized the performance because it badly needed criticism, but she had praised the performer because he needed the praise.
Effective management, whether in athletics, education, family, or business, is measured by your effectiveness in managing your personnel to get maximum productivity and benefits for all. To accomplish this objective there are two things that great managers always do. Number one, they always expect every member of the team to do their best; and number two, they always inspect to make certain they get what they expected. (There is almost nothing as demotivating to a subordinate as having a completed project ignored or taken for granted after heart and soul have been poured into that project.)
Question: Suppose your inspection reveals that the project is either unsatisfactory or not up to the standards you feel that individual is capable of attaining. Do you “brag on him” or “fuss at him”? Answer: Neither. To brag on any project that represents less than a person’s capability is to encourage mediocrity, and the corporate world is already oversupplied with that commodity. You owe that person more than that. To “fuss” at him or to be harshly critical could well destroy the subordinate’s confidence and stifle his initiative for future projects. You also owe that person and your company more than that. Question: So what do you do? Answer: You use a page from my mother’s notebook. Criticize the performance—not the performer!
Effective leadership demands that kind of approach. Extend the hand of encouragement to the person while making it clear that you expect—even demand—that he use his ability for maximum results. In short, have that person reaching for more, but do it without challenging or questioning his worth as an individual. Assure him that you really respect and appreciate his ability—and that’s why work that is not consistent with his ability is unacceptable.
The ABCs of Management
Ken Blanchard has worked with several other outstanding authors to compile a series of “one minute” books. These books are easy to read and have really simplified some foundational concepts. Dr. Blanchard worked with Dr. Robert Lorber on a book called Putting the One Minute Manager to Work. In this outstanding book, these men identify the ABCs of management and reveal some startling facts.
A = Activators … what a manager does before performance
B = Behavior … performance, what someone says or does
C = Consequences … what a manager does after performance
For example, according to Blanchard and Lorber, “Most people think activators have a greater influence on performance than consequences. And yet, only 15–25% of what influences performance comes from activators like goal setting, while 75–85% of it (behavior) comes from consequences like praising and reprimands.” What happens after a person does something has more impact than what happens before! To use another “one minute” phrase, “Catch them doing something right!” If you can catch people doing something well, no matter how small it may seem, and positively reinforce them for doing it, they will continue to grow in a positive direction.
Does this mean that we are to ignore the mistakes of those for whom we are responsible? Of course not, but there is a correct way to handle the errors or deal with the person whose overall job performance is unsatisfactory or begins to slip. I will address these issues later in this chapter. For the moment, however, let me simply state that the best managers make finding the good in others a priority. Too many managers do exactly the opposite.
Action Often Precedes the Feeling
Most of us, in our daily managerial duties, don’t feel like goodfinders. As a matter of fact, we often become the exact opposite and function in a role similar to school disciplinarians or police detectives. Den Roossien, past executive vice president of the Zig Ziglar Corporation, uses a slightly different technique that I would like to recommend to you. Den was responsible for the daily operations of our company and was our chief financial officer. He came from an accounting background, and he would be the first to tell you that people skills are not emphasized in accounting courses and that he really had to study and work on this area of his professional expertise. One technique Den used while he was with our company, which I believe you will find extremely helpful, was to keep a running list of the minute, and sometimes seemingly insignificant, successes of the people who fell under his responsibility. The list may have included things such as staying late to see that a “rush” package got out on time or arriving early to set up chairs for our Monday morning devotions—the little things that make the big difference. He would verbally point out the fact that he appreciated the effort—as soon as possible after the behavior. This follows one of the most important rules of positive reinforcement: It should be immediate. In addition, he wrote the behavior down in a notebook so that at the end of the year, or at quarterly review times, he could share with our people-building team a series of seemingly inconsequential behaviors that worked together to dramatically impact the bottom line of our company.
The time Den invested in keeping notes was really worthwhile when compared to the goodwill and positive reinforcement benefits. Sure, it takes discipline to remember and follow through, but Den was committed to a disciplined approach when it came to the factors and procedures that positively impacted our company. Discipline and organization were both involved, and fortunately, Den has fully developed both characteristics (there was even a persistent rumor that he was so well organized he periodically proofread the Xerox copies).
Did he always feel like doing this? Certainly not, but action often precedes the feeling. When it comes to giving positive feedback, we sometimes may not feel like doing so; that is why it is even more important that we do so immediately. If griping and complaining can become a habit, why can’t goodfinding become a habit? One reason is that we have not been trained to look for the good. Another obvious reason is that we don’t fully comprehend the motivational impact a word of encouragement can have on an employee or coworker.
There are two things you must remember. Number one: The compliment must be sincere. If not, the people you work with will know it faster than you do, and you will lose all credibility. Number two: You cannot follow every compliment with a correction. When this happens, the technique is viewed as manipulative because it is. This results in the Double Lose in the long run.
How do you feel when you get a memo or phone call and the boss says, “I want to see you, right away!” Ninety-five out of one hundred people get that “glitch” in their stomachs and that How did he find out? thought in their minds. We have been trained to expect the worst in that type of situation. However, imagine that your boss is the kind of people manager who looks for the good and normally compliments you. When you get the call, you actually look forward to your time together—it’s a whole new mind-set. The real question is, How do you want your workers, friends, spouse, children, and others to feel when they get the call that you want to see them?
A Tool for Written Feedback
Some people really do have trouble verbalizing feedback; but have no fear, because this is an acquired or learned skill. However, until you learn the skill, you need a practical tool for feedback. Here is a great one for you, whether you have excellent verbal skills or are just learning. In our Ziglar Training Systems seminars, we use a tool or concept called the I LIKE … BECAUSE pad. Each participant is given a pad like the one shown in the illustration and asked to note things they like or appreciate about class members during the seminar. This is an original idea given to us by Bay City High School in Bay City, Texas. It has an enormous impact on seminar participants, as well as on numerous homes and businesses across America where it is used.
The I LIKE … BECAUSE pad teaches us to look for the good and causes us to point out the positives we see in others. The comments run from the simple, such as complimenting the way a person smiles, to the more complex ideas, showing deeper levels of appreciation.
When we first introduced the concept in our Born to Win seminar i
n Dallas, there was one participant who used his body language to express his obvious disapproval. He squirmed, turned to the side, folded his arms, crossed his legs, and in general said, “I’m not having any part of this silliness!” Well, our seminar facilitators watched this man’s comments carefully as they distributed the sheets to the participants. The first day’s comments were seldom more than a few words. On day two, his comments gradually got longer, and on day three he was filling up the front and back of the sheets. At the end of class, he stood up and said, “When these I LIKE … BECAUSE pads were introduced, I thought it was the silliest idea I had ever heard, but it’s amazing how much you people have changed over the last few days!” Obviously, the people had changed because Born to Win really is a life-changing experience, but even more obviously, this man had also changed because he was learning to look for the good in others.
We have a two-day seminar called Effective Business Presentations, in which we coach people on their communication skills. Over the two days, the people are videotaped a dozen times and given private coaching and feedback on how they might improve their communication skills. In addition to American Airlines, DuPont, and others, world-famous Neiman-Marcus department store had our instructors “in house” to train some of their key personnel. They liked the I LIKE concept, adapted it, and printed YOU ARE WHAT WE’RE FAMOUS FOR! on their pads. Under this great heading, they write their positive comments about their peers.
Does Anybody Ever Really Use Those Things?
Krish Dhanam tells this story about the I LIKE … BECAUSE comments:
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[Text not included because of rights restrictions.]
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Krish isn’t the only one at our company who enjoys I LIKE … BECAUSE comments. Laurie Magers is my executive assistant and one of the most efficient people you will ever meet. In over twenty-five years of working together, I think she has made three mistakes (and two of those were my fault!). The error she probably felt worst about was forgetting to tell me (again) about a television interview. You can imagine how bad she felt, and despite the fact that I pointed out that this was no major catastrophe and that it was at least 50 percent my fault, she was feeling very down for the biggest part of that day.
The next day when Laurie arrived at work, I LIKE … BECAUSE notes were hanging from the air conditioner vent above her desk and in a few other prominent places. Some of her friends at the office had noticed that she was down, found out why, and decided to do something to cheer her up. Someone had written, “I like Laurie because she can leap over a tall building with her computer under her arm!” and someone else wrote, “I like Laurie because she types at the speed of light!” And there were others who said, “I like Laurie because she is always willing to listen!” or, “I like Laurie because she is the most conscientious person in the Zig Ziglar Corporation!” Laurie was literally moved to tears by the thoughtfulness and encouragement of her fellow employees. And talk about motivated—man alive, you should have seen her productivity! She was back to normal in no time flat. The thoughtfulness of others, the fact that others were willing to look for the good and then point it out, helped Laurie through a difficult time.
Now if you are having a little trouble with the concept, this probably means you are zeroing in on the wrong word. The key word on the sheet is not like. If that word bothers you, simply scratch it out and insert appreciate or respect. The key word is because! This word moves the concept out of the superficial and general into the sincere and specific.
All of the effective management books on the market today encourage us to give feedback to employees. Giving feedback successfully means pointing out specific and observable behavior. “I like John because he brought in the project on time and under budget!” Not, “I like John because he is a good employee.” “I like Jane because she worked overtime for three straight days to finish an important project!” Not, “I like Jane because she works hard.” Remember: Catch them doing something right! When you do, you build on what’s right instead of what’s wrong.
Unless you have written or received an I LIKE … BECAUSE note, you cannot fully comprehend the impact of such a simple idea. Let me offer you a challenge right now: I want you to think of someone you need to tell that you appreciate, like (love), and/or respect them. Please, think of that someone and make a commitment to yourself to stop reading and share a verbal or written I LIKE immediately!
Our course for schools is called the I CAN course.[1] It was developed by Mrs. Mamie McCullough and is based on the principles in my first book, See You at the Top. One of the assignments we give the students is to go home and tell their parents they love them. You would be shocked, but your heart would also be warmed, if you could read some of the letters or listen in on some of the phone calls we get from parents in tears because, for the first time in their lives, a twelve- or fourteen-year-old child has said he or she loves them. Somebody in your life needs to know you appreciate them. You really need to make a commitment to you to do that today! Go ahead. The first time is by far the most difficult or awkward. In short order, because of the wonderful feedback, it will be fun and extremely rewarding.
Unusual Commodities
Love and respect are possibly the two most needed commodities in our society today. Unfortunately, they are also among the rarest. The reason they are unusual is that the only way we can get them is by giving them away. If you are not as loved or respected as you would like to be, you should give yourself a “gut” check and see if you are giving either of these items away. An important fact to remember is this: You cannot give away something you do not possess. In other words, the love and respect you should give to others is something you must have within yourself!
“There are high spots in all of our lives,” wrote George Matthew Adams, “and most of them have come about through encouragement from someone else. I don’t care how great, how famous or successful a man or woman may be, each hungers for applause.” If you will just recapture how good you feel after you have encouraged someone else, no other suggestion is necessary to persuade you to seize every opportunity to give encouragement. “Encouragement is oxygen to the soul. Truly great work seldom comes from a worker without encouragement. No one ever lived long, happily or productively without it.”
William James, the noted psychologist and philosopher, said without qualification: “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” By helping to preserve the employee’s or associate’s self-respect, the effective leader brings him closer to alliance by demonstrating a shared concern in a major area of personal values.
This approach is also desirable in dealing with opponents; it is vital in dealing with subordinates. The constant objective of higher-level executives must be to strengthen the competence and commitment of those who, in the last analysis, are responsible for implementing organizational objectives.
As Dr. Alan C. Filley writes in his important book, Interpersonal Conflict Resolution, the portrait we draw of ourselves is a major determinant of how we behave: Various studies indicate that those with low self-esteem (1) are more likely to feel threatened in a situation, (2) are more vulnerable and dependent upon a power-laden situation, (3) have greater need for structure, (4) inhibit aggression, (5) are easily persuaded, and (6) yield more to group pressure than those with high self-esteem.
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You cannot give away something you do not possess!
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Not to be ignored is the importance of encouraging members of the group to respect each other. Acknowledging individual achievement should be done in ways that not only strengthen relationships between superior and subordinate but between the subordinate and his peers. Praise given to one person should never be stated in terms that criticize other members of the group. And wherever the achievement was in fact accompanied by help from others, their contribution should also be acknowledged. Any other approach is likely to lead to group tensions rather than increased coop
eration.
Essentially, the key principle is the importance of sharing the credit, both with and among subordinates. In a rare moment of self-revelation, Casey Stengel once said in perfectly literate phrases: “Ability is the art of getting credit for all the home runs somebody else hits.” But the surest way to keep the team from hitting home runs is to take the credit for yourself and never administer the athlete’s salute—the pat on the base runner’s behind.
But Isn’t There a Time When We Must “Come Down On” Others?
Yes. Of course all feedback is not going to be positive. Some of you are thinking that I have overemphasized the concept of goodfinding—and you are partially correct. You really cannot say too much or find too much good in others, as long as each comment is sincere. The reason I have spent such an extended time writing about pointing out the good is that we (as a society in general) are so negligent in doing so. Now that the point has been emphasized, exactly how do we go about letting others know we are not pleased with their performance?
Answer: We start by really understanding what Jean Paul Ricter meant when he said, “A man takes contradictions and advice much more easily than people think, only he will not bear it when violently given, even if it is well-founded. Hearts are flowers; they remain open to the softly falling dew, but shut up in the violent downpour of rain.”
