by Katie Price
‘That’s so brave, just changing course like that. I don’t know if I’d have the guts to do it.’
‘You’re still young. We both are. Everything seems important when we’re this age but I reckon once you’re older, you’ve had three kids and a thirty-year marriage, you start to chill out about stuff. It’s not all about work.’
‘Says the guy who trained for six years to become a lawyer.’
The level of training Luke had done for his law career was staggering, but he was equally in awe of Jas’s job and found everything she did and said fascinating. She found herself opening up again about her uncertainty as to what her next career move should be. Luke never pushed any subjects but Jas felt she could talk to him about most things. Apart from Richard, that is. That part she was certain she wanted to leave out.
Family was clearly of paramount importance to Luke and Jas really liked that. She found it refreshing, especially after Richard who was ungratefully rude about his parents. It was funny how only now she was remembering the bad stuff about him. When they were first together she couldn’t find any fault in him. Talk about rose-tinted glasses. The more time she spent in Luke’s company, the more she realised what a shit Richard was compared to him. Not so much at the start of their relationship when Jas was truly happy, but certainly since they’d moved to London and he’d changed entirely for the worse. He’d never once offered to cook for her. Massage her feet? No way. Asked her about her own day at work, or after her sisters? Forget it! Jas wanted to know more about Luke.
‘So, do you think you’ll stay in this job for a while then?’ she asked later, topping up their wine. Her stomach was growling for food by now.
‘I think so. Entertainment law is pretty interesting. I’d probably like to go and work for a legal firm, though, where there’d be more money than at Channel 6 so I can buy a house, but I’m happy where I am for now. I don’t think it’s a good idea to try to plan too rigidly. Saving up for a house is one thing but I see people trying to map out the next five, ten years of their life and it’s pointless.’
‘I don’t plan anything, that’s the problem! I’ve no idea what the next five years hold for me.’
Luke paused. ‘Maybe that’s a good thing. I think people put too much emphasis on what they should be doing, but life doesn’t always work like that. Expect the unexpected, that’s the one thing I’ve learnt.’
Jas considered her own career. She adored working in TV but when she’d started out, interning on the newsroom floor, she had never imagined that when she finally landed a senior role she’d spend hours arguing with wannabe reality TV stars over how much they’d be getting paid to essentially go on holiday for eight weeks. Then again, she was about to go to Ibiza for eight weeks herself, so she could hardly complain. Why did she always over-think things? Why couldn’t she be more like Luke? Nothing at all seemed to bother him.
‘How are you finding the entertainment team anyway?’ she asked, changing the subject. ‘Do you miss being up on news?’
‘I’m really enjoying it so far. It’s fun. And different. But, really, so long as I’m working with decent people and getting paid, it doesn’t really bother me where I am.’
‘Nothing ever bothers you, does it? I wish I could be so content all the time instead of worrying constantly about what my next step up the career ladder is, whether I’m doing a good job, whether I’m being paid enough, whether I’m saving enough, am I a good friend, a good sister, a good daughter …’
‘Of course things bother me, as they do everyone,’ replied Luke. At that, he leant over and kissed Jas lightly on her forehead. ‘Give yourself a break. You’re ace and everything will work out the way it’s supposed to.’
There was something so calming about him, it made Jas feel happy. She really didn’t want to ruin their perfectly lovely evening. Thankfully, she was literally saved by the bell as her entryphone buzzed loudly.
Luke lifted Jas’s legs off his lap and sprang up to answer the door. ‘Food’s here!’
Seconds later he was chatting to the delivery guys about the balmy weather. Jas willed him to come back in with the food, she was starving! Her phone rang and, seeing Lila’s number pop up, Jas hit the red button to reject the call. She’d call her sister back. Luke returned bearing two bags full of noodles, spring rolls, chicken, prawns and vegetables.
‘Et voilà!’ he said with a flourish, then went about fetching plates and cutlery from the kitchen.
Lila rang back. Again, Jas rejected the call. ‘Nice one! I’m so hungry I can barely speak,’ she called out to Luke. The phone rang yet again.
‘Whoever that is, you might want to answer. They seem insistent,’ Luke said, returning with the plates.
Bloody Lila! Impeccable timing as always. Jas picked up. ‘What?!’
‘Jesus, what’s up with you?’ Lila sounded genuinely baffled. ‘Did I call at a bad time?’
Jas sighed. She was about to tell her sister that, yes, obviously it was a bad time as she’d ignored the past two calls, but decided against making a big deal out of it. ‘Nothing, babe. What’s up, you okay?’
‘I’ve got a hot date tomorrow night and I need to borrow some clothes. I’m coming over in the morning. What do you have that’s new and irresistible?’
Jas glanced at Luke, now stuffing his face with eyes fixed on the TV as he flicked through the sports channels. He looked cute. ‘Er, I don’t know, Lila, just come and have a look. You’ll find something you like as usual. I want my denim jacket back, by the way, don’t think I’ve forgotten.’
‘Yeah, whatever, I think it’s at Mum and Dad’s now.’
‘You think? Lila, that’s my favourite jacket. Bring it tomorrow when you come over or else don’t come over at all, I mean it.’
‘Urgh, fine! Whatever, you’re so annoying.’
‘Urgh, you’re so annoying,’ Jas mimicked.
‘So, you’ll let me go through your wardrobe?’
‘What sort of look are you going for?’
‘I thought maybe that Maje blouse of yours.’
‘No way! You’ll only ruin it and it cost me a hundred and fifty pounds.’
‘For God’s sake, Jas, you have everything! Why do you have to be so selfish? I’d let you borrow anything of mine.’
‘I don’t want to borrow festival wellies and a crop top, thanks.’
‘Pleeeeeeeeease, Jas. It will go perfectly with my leather trousers. I need some heels too. He’s a City boy, much older, very serious but super-rich. So, I’ve got to look older.’
‘Charming!’
Lila tutted. ‘You know what I mean. Grown-up. Classic. Anyway, I’ll be there at some point in the morning.’
Jas knew in Lila-speak this meant ‘some time before 4 p.m.’.
‘Just call me when you’re on your way. I’ve got things to do tomorrow. Right, is that the wildly important question you needed to ring me three times for? Can I go now?’
‘I’m bored. What you doing? Can I come over?’
‘Nope.’
‘Whhhhhy?’ whinged Lila.
Jas playfully nudged Luke with her foot. ‘I’ve got company.’ He looked up and gave her a sly smile.
‘Oh my God, who? Is it that fit guy from work? It is, isn’t it? Cough once if it is.’
‘Goodbye, Lila.’ And before her sister could whine again, she hung up.
‘That was my little sister. I hung up before she could invite herself over.’
Luke grinned. ‘I get it. You want me to meet your family already.’
‘Don’t flatter yourself ! I told her very specifically not to come over!’
But Luke was enjoying winding her up. ‘I see your game, Whiteley. All right, all right, I’ll go to dinner at your parents’ house. God, stop harassing me!’
They both laughed and Jas gently kicked her feet against Luke’s shin and then they were play-fighting. ‘I do yoga too, you know, and I’m very strong,’ she laughed as Luke effortlessly held her down with one arm w
hile helping himself to a forkful of noodles with the other.
‘Yeah, you’re so tough,’ he teased as Jas tried to wriggle out, but to no avail. His strength was such a turn-on …
‘I don’t want to hurt you,’ she protested, wrapping her legs around Luke’s strong arm and guiding him down so he was on top of her. Their lips brushed and just as he leant in for a kiss she rolled away so he fell face down onto the sofa.
‘Ha, I win!’ She jumped up, triumphantly.
‘Right, that’s it. You’re dead, Whiteley.’ And in one motion he pinned her down on the floor and held her hands above her head as she tried to wriggle free but had no chance. They both burst out laughing. Jas wrapped her legs around his, pulling him in closer. They kissed, nervously at first and breaking away to laugh, then locking lips for longer and more intense kisses. Luke’s hands stroked Jas’s back and she coiled her fingers through his short hair.
‘What was it you wanted to tell me?’ Luke asked as he eventually pulled away.
‘Oh, I can’t even remember now,’ lied Jas.
‘Right, well, this food is getting cold so enough nonsense,’ Luke mocked, turning his attention away from Jas and back to his plate. She pursed her lips. Just what was she getting herself into?
Chapter 11
Netflix was switched on and, two and a half hours of Avenger-superhero-fighting later, the entire takeaway had been demolished as had a bottle and a half of white wine. As the end credits rolled, Luke lifted the bottle but Jas shook her head, deciding to switch to sparkling water. She wanted a clear head for tomorrow. Even though it was Saturday, she’d be working.
‘Come on then, tell me. What’s wrong with you? There must be something,’ Jas teased as Luke had dutifully cleared all plates into her dishwasher.
‘I mean, you know the best Thai takeaway in London and even told me you can cook. You have a great job, you’re close to your mum …’ Jas didn’t want to massage Luke’s ego too much by also adding how handsome he was. ‘What’s the glitch?’
He sighed. ‘Small penis, I’m afraid. It’s been holding me back for years.’
She almost spluttered her water out at the joke – or what she assumed was a joke!
‘The truth is, I haven’t had a relationship for a long time and my last one was pretty heavy so I’m just looking to spend time in good company. No hassle, no stress.’
Jas nodded slowly. She knew she was getting into dangerous territory talking to Luke about exes, and she was having such an enjoyable evening that she’d by now resolutely ruled out bringing up the subject of her awful husband. But she pictured Luke with a gorgeous ex-girlfriend that he’d never gotten over and felt a flash of jealousy. There was no harm in digging a little deeper, she reasoned.
‘So, what happened?’
‘I was engaged to a girl I met doing the law conversion course.’
Engaged?
‘We broke up some years ago. I’ve had a few flings here and there since but nothing serious. That’s it.’
He closed the dishwasher and, taking Jas’s hand, led her back into the living room and sat them down on the sofa. ‘Let’s not talk about me.’
There was no way Jas was leaving it at that. ‘No, I want to. Really. I’ve been talking about myself non-stop tonight.’
‘It’s not the best story.’
‘No judgement, I promise. Please?’
Luke paused then let out a small sigh. ‘Her name was Jenny. We were young and in love so, when we both graduated, I proposed.’
Jas took a sip of water and said nothing, signalling him to go on.
‘She got pregnant.’
Jas’s mouth dropped open.
‘Yep, I know,’ he said. ‘We were twenty-seven, which I know these days seems a bit young to start a family, but I was delighted. We were financially stable-ish, and in love, so why not? But instantly things started to change. Jenny became really distant and short-tempered, always picking fights with me. I was stressed and would argue back. We weren’t in a good place and started to grow apart pretty quickly. Anyway, one evening, I came home from work and she was just there, sobbing, clutching her stomach. I thought there was something wrong with the baby – it was within the first ten weeks and, you know, anything can happen in those early stages. So, I went to call an ambulance but she begged me not to. I couldn’t get anything from her, she was so distraught, then eventually she admitted that she’d just come back from the clinic.’
Jas frowned. ‘The clinic?’
‘She aborted the baby without telling me. She said she freaked out, that she was too young to be a mother and there was still so much she wanted to do with her life before having a family. If she’d just talked to me I would have understood, but to go to the clinic without saying a thing, to keep it from me … I don’t understand how someone could do that. I know it was her body but it was my baby, too.’
Jas was stunned. How could anyone do such a thing? She felt furious at this girl and protective of Luke, but kept her thoughts to herself. ‘Then what happened?’
‘I broke it off there and then and moved out of the house we were renting in Brighton. I rented a mate’s spare room, pretty quickly got a job in London and relocated.’
‘Have you seen her since?’
‘She phoned me constantly at first, saying how sorry she was and begging for us to get back together. I was too angry to speak to her. A while later we met for coffee. I told her that I could forgive her but never forget and that’s why we could never be together. I wished her a happy life but said I couldn’t see her any more and that was it. Last I heard she’d moved to Australia.’
‘Wow. I can’t believe you forgave her, just like that.’
‘It wasn’t just like that, Jas. It took months for me to be able to say that. I was furious for a long time and took it out on people who didn’t deserve it. I went out every night and had one-night stands with girls I never called again. I soon realised that I wasn’t that sort of guy, though, and I never would be. I’m a relationship man. I like having a girlfriend. So, I ditched clubs for the gym, got myself into shape, started playing sports with the lads and spent time with my family. I started to realise what was important in life.’
‘Wow,’ was all Jas could say again.
‘Jenny and I were clearly not meant to be,’ Luke said. ‘I came to realise that things were hard for her too and the decision she made was a horrible one. I didn’t want to hold on to all that anger and negativity so I chose to forgive her.’
‘But how could you?’
‘Everyone makes mistakes, Jas.’
She considered what an amazing guy Luke was. It took a real man to forgive something like that and talk so openly about it. Luke clearly had his priorities in order and was secure and stable. Compared to him, Jas felt like a complete mess.
‘I haven’t freaked you out by telling you that, have I?’
‘No!’ she replied hastily. ‘I’m really touched you told me. You have a lot more maturity then most men.’
‘I don’t usually reveal so much on a second date. There’s something about you that makes me feel very comfortable.’
With that Luke slid his arms around Jas, sending sparks through her. ‘And very turned on,’ he whispered, nuzzling into her neck.
Jas bit her lip. Something switched on in her and she realised that her feelings for him were stronger than she had first suspected. This was crazy, they’d only had two dates! The physical attraction was clear, but this was more than that. And now it suddenly felt very real. At this realisation her body tensed up, as if it was reminding her mind that things were moving too fast and she just wasn’t ready. It wasn’t that she didn’t fancy Luke; it was more that she didn’t want the uncertainty of someone new in her life right now. Not yet. She wanted a divorce and then a simple life, not emotions that ran away with her. Surely now more than ever she needed control and stability. Jas was still adamant that she didn’t want to talk about Richard. That was her business. But how could s
he carry on with Luke while holding back such a big secret after he’d just been so open and honest with her? Jas didn’t feel right about being here with him. No matter what lustful urges her body might be feeling, she knew what she had to do.
‘Luke, I need to say something too.’
‘Enough talking, Jas.’ He kissed her with more passion this time and Jas melted against his body before pulling herself away again. God, he was so distracting! But this had to end. Now.
‘Luke, please, listen to me.’
His expression turned to one of concern. ‘Okay. What’s up?’
Jas looked at him; those gorgeous green eyes of his were boring into her. She felt rotten, especially after what Luke had told her about how badly his ex-girlfriend had treated him. But it would be wrong to lead him on.
‘You’re an amazing guy, Luke. But I can’t do this.’
‘Can’t do what?’
‘This. Us. Whatever it is, I can’t do it. It’s too fast and I’m freaking out.’ This was true. It was all getting too much for Jas. Both fancying Luke and feeling too scared to let it progress any further was bewildering. She was feeling too much pressure. And how much did she really know about this guy? Sure, he seemed to be almost perfect, but hadn’t she thought Richard was almost perfect when she married him? Jas wasn’t sure if she was ready to trust anyone with her emotions again so soon. The relationship with Richard had damaged her so much. The marriage itself was painful enough, but the break-up was even worse.
Luke seemed confused and understandably so. He had no idea what inner turmoil she was going through. ‘If there’s anything you want to talk about, Jas, you can tell me.’
No, no, stop being so nice!
‘We’ve had an amazing connection all night, don’t tell me you didn’t feel it?’
