Chapter Sixteen
Phoebe sat on the edge of the bed in Peanut’s room. She couldn’t believe it had been two weeks since the first night he’d come to her bed. Despite her slight protests, he’d slept with her in his arms every night. Phoebe worried about Jasmine finding out, but Peanut had assured her it was fine. She wasn’t so sure, but she couldn’t deny her need for him. Even though she wanted to stand on her own two feet without anyone to help her, she found herself clinging to Peanut. Not because she was afraid to make it on her own but because she liked having him close. He and Jasmine had become her family in the short time she’d known them and it was quite surreal. She hadn’t had a real family for a long time and having one now made her feel whole in a way she hadn’t felt since before meeting Johnny.
She still didn’t know if she was just a convenience to Peanut, or if he really cared for her. His excitement over the baby was weird too. He showed off the picture every chance he got. Yesterday when Hammer and Star were over with their boys she’d heard him telling Hammer his boy was going to be better at sports than Hammer’s boys ever thought of being. It was odd. She had a feeling that Peanut had already decided they were a couple. Phoebe had tried to tell herself that she shouldn’t allow herself to hope that he wanted a real relationship with her, but she couldn’t seem to help it. Everything he did made her think that was what he was seeing for them in the future but until he told her that for sure, she was afraid to hope for it. Her heart was already hopelessly involved.
She glanced at the door of the bathroom again, her nerves twisting her stomach into knots. Jasmine was staying with a friend from school tonight. They’d dropped her off an hour ago and on the way home Peanut had asked her to sleep in his room. Since that first night he’d kissed her passionately just before bed, leaving her breathless and more than a little turned on, she’d been trying hard to hold him at arm’s length, but it wasn’t working. She was pretty sure that she was ready to take things to the next level, but she didn’t know for sure that she was prepared. Her hands twisted in her nightshirt, tugging it down to her knees as she waited on him to finish his shower.
She was still married to Johnny which bothered her more than she wanted to admit, a fact that going to the doctor today had brought home. The nurse had assumed that Peanut was her husband which had been a little awkward. Thankfully he’d brushed over the information without confirming or denying that she wasn’t his wife. To say she’d been embarrassed was an understatement. How did you tell a stranger that the man you were bringing to your obstetrics appointment wasn’t the baby’s father nor was he your husband?
Yeah, that wasn’t something she wanted to get into.
Her heart jumped in her chest when she heard the shower shut off. Shit, he was almost finished. She really didn’t know what to do with herself. She wanted him to make love to her, but she felt guilty having sex with him while still married to Johnny. Her hands dug into her thighs as she tried hard not to think about it. Her marriage to Johnny wasn’t something she could change. She believed in the vows she’d made all those years ago. If her marriage had been different then she would never consider having sex with Peanut.
Hopefully Peanut would find a way around her having to return to the state in order to divorce Johnny soon. She wasn’t sure how long she could deal with this guilt bombarding her. Marriage had always been a forever thing for her. You made a vow and you kept it. Johnny had made that impossible. That didn’t solve the dilemma she now faced sitting here knowing that she and Peanut were likely going to have sex.
She glanced at the door, her body shifting restlessly as she waited. She wondered what he was doing in there. Her eyes closed and she felt her heart rate pick up. She was breathing so hard she was almost hyperventilating. She needed to calm the hell down or Peanut was going to think she was scared of him.
She didn’t want that, but she was really freaking out. Maybe it was the pressure of not being sure that she wanted this or maybe it was normal. Hell, she didn’t know. Johnny had messed her up so bad that she still jumped anytime something unexpected happened. A few nights ago, she’d been in the kitchen cooking dinner. Peanut had taken Jasmine to the game store to spend her allowance, so she’d been by herself. She’d had the music up and hadn’t heard the door open or the footfalls of the man who’d come into the house looking for Peanut.
Viking had been more than a little shocked when she’d screamed and thrown the flour that she’d been prepping for the chicken she was frying at his face. She had nearly had a heart attack. He’d stood in the middle of the kitchen covered in the flour with his mouth hanging open in surprise. She’d been scared half out of her mind staring at him and wondering what he’d do. He already didn’t like her very much and she’d been sure that he’d lose his mind.
Only he hadn’t. Instead he’d started laughing. Not a little chuckle but a deep-bellied laugh that had brought tears to his eyes. Then he’d just shrugged and said that he’d deserved that before helping her clean up the mess. It had been the first real interaction the two of them had had. Peanut and Jasmine had returned home shortly after that. He’d been pissed to find Viking sitting in the kitchen talking to her while she cooked when he’d walked into the kitchen. She’d told him to relax and sent them into the living room to watch TV. She’d prepped the table once dinner was finished and they’d all sat down and ate together. Despite its ominous beginnings it had been a nice night.
She thought that maybe Viking was a little worried that she was taking Jasmine and Peanut away from him. She understood. Peanut and Jasmine were Viking’s family and she could see how someone coming in and taking their affections away from him would make anyone react badly. She was pretty sure that what she was dubbing ‘the flour incident’ had started a tentative truce between them. Viking seemed to relax around her, and Peanut was skeptical but happy to have his friend acting more normal.
Phoebe heard the door opening and her ears started ringing as she panicked a little more, trying not to let it show by gripping the sides on the bed hard. Peanut came out of the bathroom preceded by a puff of steam. He stopped with a towel to his head wearing only a pair of boxer shorts. She couldn’t help but take in the delicious perfection of his thick muscular form. His abs were roped, and the deep V of his hips made her mouth water despite her nerves. His skin was tan, almost golden, and his muscles glistened slightly from his recent shower.
Phoebe felt herself getting excited and squirmed a little, her hands still clinging tightly to the edge of the bed as she took him in. He stopped drying his hair, his eyes on her. He frowned a bit and watched her silently.
“Lovely, you need to relax,” Peanut said, turning to toss the towel back into the bathroom.
“I’m fin-ne,” Phoebe squeaked. Her cheeks heated and she knew that hadn’t sounded at all confident or reassuring.
“Sure you are,” Peanut said with a little chuckle. He walked closer, standing before her with his hands at his sides and his legs resting against hers. His nearness didn’t make her nerves kick up a notch like she expected; instead they seemed to calm. She looked up into his kind eyes, her heart pumping hard in her ears. She couldn’t help the way her breath caught as she took in all his sexy skin on display. Her hands lifted to touch, but she was unsure if that was okay and let them fall away. Peanut sighed a little before lifting her hands to his abs.
“Touch me if you want. Or don’t. Lovely, this is all on you. I’ve already let you know where I want this thing between us to go. You just have to decide when it’s happening. You’re in control here, Phoebe,” Peanut said softly as he pushed his hand through her hair, his gaze still holding hers.
“I—I don’t know what to do,” Phoebe whispered.
“You do what feels right, Lovely. That’s it.”
She nodded, her eyes wide. Her hands moved over his abs feeling the hard ridges of his muscles and the slight abrasion of old scars that lined his smooth skin in places. Her heart was still pumping way too fast as she ran he
r hands over his skin. Peanut didn’t speak but she noticed his dick was hard and pushing at the confines of his boxers. Phoebe didn’t stop touching him despite the nerves that roared to life inside her. She was shaking and she wasn’t sure if she would make it through the next little bit or if she’d end up passing out from all the tension jumbling up inside her.
Peanut tilted her head back making her eyes meet his. “Lovely, relax. You can’t do anything wrong and it goes only as far as you want it to. Nothing is going to make me angry with you. Even if you want to stop in the middle of my dick meeting your pussy. You’re safe with me. I promise.”
Phoebe wanted to tell him that she wasn’t scared he’d hurt her so much as she was fearful that she’d do it wrong and leave him unsatisfied. Only she couldn’t seem to push the words past her almost numb lips. Her breathing was still erratic, and she probably looked like a deer caught in the headlights. She leaned forward and buried her face into his stomach, feeling his arms wrap around her as she hugged him. She felt him kiss her head gently, making soothing sounds.
Peanut was such a good man and she really shouldn’t be so damned frightened of displeasing him, but Johnny had trained her well. She had lost her confidence in herself. It hadn’t happened all at once but over the past few years he’d turned her into a fearful frightened creature who didn’t know her worth. She was struggling to find herself again. Each day she was a little bit better and one day she’d be the prickly strong person she’d been before she’d met Johnny but tonight she just wanted to be a woman—Peanut’s woman, and her fear that she wouldn’t be enough was almost too much for her to handle.
Peanut’s hands were still buried in her hair cupping the back of her head to tilt her head back. She knew he would tell her that they didn’t have to have sex, but she wanted to. Determination filled her and she kissed his stomach. Her lips caressing his golden skin and hearing his groan as his hands tightened in her hair, she found herself getting lost in the moment. Kissing upwards heading for his lips, she stopped on the way to leave a smattering of kisses across his chest, her teeth nipping at his nipples. Peanut moaned again as her tongue circled one hard nipple.
“Lovely, you’re making me crazy. I need to touch you,” Peanut growled, his voice husky with need.
“Yes,” Phoebe managed to get out, her hands caressing his body and feeling the hardness that she’d felt pressed against her back every night since he’d started sleeping in her room pressed against her stomach. Her mind began to whirl, and she felt panic set in. She blurted out the first thought that popped into her head.
“Wait, I can’t call you Peanut when we’re having sex,” she said stalling.
“Mark,” Peanut said.
“What?”
“My real name is Mark. You can only call me that when we’re in bed together.” Peanut whispered.
His lips caressed her with soft kisses and gentle nips moving down the side of her neck to place a kiss on her collarbone. His handy work left her gasping for breath as she tried to compute what he’d said. The sensation of his lips caressing her was bombarding her senses and it left her feeling like they were almost too much for her to handle. She hadn’t felt so much desire for someone’s touch in more years than she could count. She hadn’t wanted Johnny to touch her since the first time he’d hurt her. Desire poured through her now and she suddenly wanted everything at once. She wanted every caress, every touch she’d been missing out on for the last five years.
Peanut reached down and tugged at the hem of her nightshirt, slowly taking it off her as if he was expecting her to protest but she was beyond that. She needed him to touch her, to make her feel the passion she’d been holding inside herself for so long she had almost forgotten it was there. His breathing became heavy and almost panting as he pulled the shirt over her head. She didn’t cover herself even though everything inside her told her to. Instead she gripped the bed and waited for him to look his fill.
“Damn, Lovely. You are so damned beautiful,” Peanut breathed, his eyes caressing her.
Phoebe felt a little frown tug at her lips. She wasn’t anything special and she knew it. She was thin in all the wrong places and her breasts were barely more than a handful. Her nipples had always been way too big. Johnny had called them pancakes and told her they were ugly. Her frown must have bothered Peanut because he reached out, tweaking one nipple gently.
“Do not let that bastard in this bed. He was an evil fucker who has no place here with us.” he grunted, looking grim as he accurately guess who she was thinking about. She wasn’t frightened by the look, which surprised her. That same look on Johnny’s face would have sent her into near hysterics. On Peanut it amused her. She knew he was mad that she was doubting herself because of what Johnny had told her was wrong with her body, but she wasn’t frightened he’d hurt her. Peanut ran his thumb over one of her tight nipples making her mouth open on a silent gasp.
“So perfect,” Peanut whispered, his eyes dark with desire.
“They’re too big,” Phoebe whispered.
“No, they’re perfect.” Her mouth opened to deny it again, but he placed his finger over her lips stopping the words from leaving her mouth.
“Perfect,” he said again before his mouth took hers in a kiss that left her reeling.
Her tongue met his in a timeless dance that had her body tingling in places she’d forgotten. Her thighs clenched and she tried hard not to moan. His lips slipped down her neck, his caresses leaving her breathless and more than a little turned on. Her lips parted on another wordless gasp when his mouth covered her right breast, sucking the hard bud of her nipple into his hot mouth.
Her loud moan didn’t stop him from his task. He licked around the tight bud scraping it lightly with his teeth, leaving her a breathless mass of need. Peanut gently urged her back onto the bed and she lay down, allowing him to climb in beside her, his mouth still moving from one nipple to the other. His hot tongue circled first one tight peak and then the other as she held onto his shoulders trying not to come from just his mouth on her breasts. She didn’t want him to think she was a freak, but it felt so good that she couldn’t stop her moans or her body’s trembling. Her pussy was so wet, and her body was clenching in rhythm with his sucking. Her whole being was throbbing in anticipation of the orgasm he was pushing her towards.
Phoebe found her nails digging into his skin as his lips slowly moved away from her breasts and down her stomach. She wasn’t sure where he was going but she could guess. She tried to pull him back up, but he just ignored her silent direction. Johnny had never done that. He was the only person she’d ever been sexual with and oral sex was something she’d never experienced. Peanut paused, looking at her with his lips resting on her slightly raised stomach. He watched her for a long moment, likely assessing her reaction to his goal. His hands slowly teased the edges of her white lace panties.
“I—I’ve never done that.”
“First time for everything, Lovely,” Peanut grunted, returning to kissing her stomach and moving ever closer to her pussy as she clung to his shoulders trying not to panic. His hands slipped her panties down her legs and off before she could react. He kissed above her mound again, his tongue teasing her skin.
Her eyes closed and she was silently trying to get a grip on the raging inferno that was currently ripping her apart with heady desire. He kissed a gentle circle around her baby bump leaving a soft kiss in the middle before moving down further, his hands hard as they spread her open for his inspection. She could feel the soft caress of his breath on her inner thighs and she gasped, trying not to lose her mind as she waited on him to take the plunge. Her heart was thundering in her ears and her hands were clenched so hard she was likely leaving marks in his skin. She couldn’t seem to find her center and her body trembled with anticipation.
His first touch was a slight nuzzle to the top of her mound with his lips softly kissing her clit. She moaned and her entire body felt electrified. She’d never felt something so mind-blowing.
Peanut blew softly on her hot skin and she let out another tortured moan. He chuckled a little before speaking.
“I love that you’re so responsive to me, Lovely. This sweet little pussy is so wet and ready for me to show it some love. I won’t rush this because I’ve been thinking about this for weeks. Weeks, Lovely.” His husky words caressed her adding another layer of need to the ones already crushing her. His hands cupped her thighs possessively and she felt his lips touch her curls. Her hands gripped the sheets beside her as he set to work, his tongue spearing through her folds like a white-hot sword. Her whole body shuddered, and she let out a keening moan as her legs trembled and her insides lit with a fire so hot that she wasn’t sure she’d survive it.
Phoebe wasn’t sure that she’d be able to take much more of his caresses because her body was already overloading. She moaned as he sucked her clit into his mouth and pressed two fingers against her entrance. She felt her insides clench and she knew her orgasm was seconds from exploding through her, and she’d bet anything he’d only started with this sweet torture. Peanut was sucking her clit while his two fingers slipped inside her. That was all it took to set her off and she was screaming out as her entire being exploded into the heavens. Phoebe had never come so hard in her life and she felt like she was breaking apart. It took her a full five minutes to come back down from the high her explosive orgasm had taken her to.
“That’s my Lovely. So damned sweet,” Peanut was mumbling as his tongue lapped at her entrance. She was surprised that he hadn’t stopped as soon as she’d come. Instead he’d continued to caress her softly. He kissed above her mound, his fingers still moving inside her, and she found her hips were still moving in rhythm to the thrust of his fingers. She was building up to another orgasm she realized as a gasp left her lips and she felt herself clenching his thick fingers.
Saved by the Devil (Devils Arms Book 3) Page 14
