by Presley Hall
The color must be obvious on my pale skin, and I’m sure Zatir notices. But he seems to like it.
He gazes down at me, smiling, heat filling his eyes, and my body throbs in response. I want to kiss him. I want him to kiss me.
There’s something wildly romantic about this—about the balcony and the garden below, the moonlight, and the returning hero come back to claim his honors. I joked about “going to the ball” with Brielle, but now I really feel like I’ve fallen into some kind of mad fairytale. Just like Emma—except this time, it’s not the prince. It’s the rogue.
And if I’m being honest? That’s a million times hotter.
Zatir’s fingers move over my cheek again, and I shudder with pleasure. There’s something so commanding and forceful about him, something about his easy confidence and worldly demeanor that makes me want to let him draw me into his arms, kiss me and teach me everything about pleasure that I’ve ever wondered about. Something tells me that a night with this man would be like nothing I’ve ever imagined. He’s seen more of the universe than I could ever dream of, and he’s probably done more things than he could tell me in a lifetime. My pulse speeds up at the thought, pounding in my throat.
This man is the embodiment of every bit of excitement and adventure and danger I’ve ever craved. And inexplicably, somehow, he wants me.
He’s saying he’s mated to me.
I stare up at him, my eyes tracing the details of his face. He’s rugged and handsome, and his age only deepens that. I’ve always known the Kalixians were handsome—I’ve never seen an unattractive one—but this is different. Now I can feel the attraction all the way down to my very bones. I feel as if everything inside me is liquified, hot and wanting. It’s all I can do not to throw caution to the wind.
“You’re very quiet.” He trails his fingers down to my jaw and then up again, pushing a fallen piece of hair out of my face. “You know, I’ve traveled all over the universe. I think by now, I must have seen almost everything there is to see. But in all the universe, I’ve never seen anything as lovely as you.”
A thrill runs through me, flaring out from my core to the very tips of my fingers and toes.
“What’s your name?” he asks. “Mine is Zatir.” He grins. “But I think you probably know that already.”
“Nadia,” I whisper.
A slow smile spreads over his face.
“Nadia,” he repeats, and my heart beats even harder. The way he says it makes heat flare inside of me, my entire body feeling as if I could levitate and float away. He makes my name sound so beautiful, like music.
Zatir leans closer, his fingers on my cheekbone sliding upward as he cups my face in the palm of his hand. I’ve always felt unusually tall, willowy, long-legged and gawky, but with this warrior leaning over me, I feel small and delicate, my face cradled in his hand like fine china. His lips are so close to mine, and as I gaze up into his amber eyes, I know he’s going to kiss me.
And I’m going to let him. There’s no question about that.
It’s been so long since I’ve been kissed, and I know this will be different than any kiss I’ve ever received.
I tilt my chin up, my eyelids fluttering closed. In another second, his lips will be on mine, warm and full and soft—
“Nadia!”
My sister’s voice hits me like a bucket of cold water dumped over my head. Zatir pulls back, straightening, and my cheeks heat as I look past him to see Brielle standing there. Her face is tight with a mixture of worry and anger, her hands on her hips.
Zatir turns toward her, and I grip the railing, feeling as if I’m burning up for another reason entirely now. Instead of desire, now it’s just embarrassment. Because I know exactly what my sister is going to have to say about this.
“What’s going on?” Brielle demands.
Behind her, I can see a few other Kalixians filtering out onto the balcony, others who either followed her up or were drawn by the noise.
“Nadia is my Irisa,” Zatir says calmly. He angles his body almost protectively in front of mine, nearly shielding me from Brielle’s view, and I remember that of course he doesn’t know who she is. To him, she’s just someone who’s come out here and interrupted the two of us. It’s a sobering reminder of just how little we actually know each other.
Brielle’s eyes go wide in her pale face, but when she speaks, her voice is tight and calm, as if she’s biting back what she really wants to say. She looks directly at me. “Nadia, is that true?”
“Um, I… We were just talking, and—”
I don’t say yes, but I also can’t say no. I don’t know what to say. I haven’t completely come to terms with it myself, with the real weight of what accepting the bond means. I haven’t made up my mind about anything.
I just want to be kissed by a handsome stranger in the moonlight, dammit! Is that really so much to ask, after everything?
Brielle purses her lips, nodding as if my non-answer has told her everything she needs to know.
“Well,” she says coolly, her full attention on Zatir now. “Unless my sister is very, very sure, then you need to back off.”
Her shoulders square, her posture tense as if she’s ready to go to blows with this warrior who is easily twice her size. It would be sweet if it weren’t so awfully embarrassing. I can see that more Kalixians have noticed what’s going on and come out to see, including Tordax, of all people.
“Your sister?” Zatir looks from me to her, sudden understanding washing over his face. But Brielle is in no mood to hear anything he has to say.
“Until Nadia accepts the bond,” she says fiercely, her voice rising, “then it’s not a foregone conclusion! And you need to just—just remember that!”
I want to sink into the ground and disappear. My cheeks are so hot they must be bright red by now. I hate being the center of attention. Everyone’s eyes are flicking between Brielle and Zatir facing off, and I shrink against the balcony, wishing I could be anywhere else. I hate that my sister is making a scene. I hate that we were discovered before I could find out what it would be like for him to kiss me. I hate that the moment is ruined now.
I want to speak up—to say something for myself. For a second, Brielle looks at me expectantly, as if she wants me to. But I still don’t know what to say, or how I feel about the bond myself. I haven’t had a chance to really process any of this.
Zatir smiles at Brielle, that same easy, roguish grin that won me over. And probably plenty of other women throughout the universe, I think dispiritedly. But it’s not going to work so easily on Brielle.
“I would never force Nadia,” he says, his voice smooth and charming, as if they’re having a perfectly ordinary conversation. “It’s not the Kalixian way, and it’s not my way. Believe me.” His lips curve up a little more. “I’ve never needed to force a woman.”
Brielle grimaces, Zatir’s charm clearly not having an effect on her. But he’s not finished. He glances back at me, and the intensity in his gaze makes me shiver. For a second, his burning amber eyes are enough to make me forget about the gathering crowd, my embarrassment, and even my ferocious sister. But it only lasts a second.
“The bond between a Kalixian and his mate is strong,” Zatir says. “And Nadia is my Irisa. Her choice will always be her own. But that doesn’t mean I can’t use every means at my disposal to show her exactly how much I desire her.”
Something about the way he says those words makes warmth sweep through me from my head to my toes, and my knees wobble. I grip the railing so tightly that my knuckles go white, but Brielle has had enough of all of this. She shakes her head and presses her lips together, stalking past Zatir as if he isn’t even there before grasping my elbow.
“Come on, Nadia. We’re leaving. I’ve heard enough of this.”
I don’t argue as she tugs me toward the balcony door. After all, I did promise her that if we came to the party and she said it was time to go, we’d go. I’d be too embarrassed to face the other guests after the sce
ne we’ve caused anyway, and I don’t think for a second that Brielle will allow me to be anywhere near Zatir for the rest of the night.
Still, I can’t help looking back at him once more, right before my sister firmly shuts the double doors behind us.
Even if I shouldn’t be, I’m irresistibly drawn to him.
And I don’t know what that means for me.
6
Zatir
I watch Nadia go as her sister tugs her away, my entire body aching for her. I can still feel her proximity, the warmth of her body so close to mine in the instant before I nearly kissed her. The sweet scent of her still lingers with me, making my blood race hotly through my veins.
As stunned as I am by this new development, I don’t question it. Every Kalixian knows about the mate bond, and just the few minutes I spent with Khrelan and his Terran queen were enough to show me that the new bonds are real.
Beyond that, I know what I feel.
I felt it down to my very bones, in my blood and marrow. I’m certain that Nadia is my Irisa.
The question is: what do I do about that?
It’s not at all what I expected to happen when I returned to Kalix. I gave up on the idea of ever having a mate long ago. I had just reached maturity when the Orkun genocide happened, and even then, I wouldn’t have been expected to mate for another five years or so. The first years of a Kalixian male’s maturity are for training, to determine if he’s suited to a place among the warriors, or for business or trade or agriculture.
Once a Kalixian finds their place, then they begin to expect the possibility of a bond to occur. Before the genocide, I saw my older sister and her friends going to festivals, watching the males, hoping for the spark to strike. There was plenty of flirting, and many younger Kalixians didn’t wait for the bond to begin exploring the pleasures of adulthood. Many of my friends and I certainly didn’t. I still clearly remember my first time, in a field behind the house where one of my sister’s friends lived. Sometimes, in the rare occasions late at night when I allow myself to think about the distant past, I can still remember the softness of the blanket under my hands, the one we tossed down in the grass right before I laid her down on it.
I was good with women even back then.
But all that was a long time ago, and long lost. When the virus came and the Kalixian females died, it seemed clear that those of us who were unmated would never find a true match.
It almost seemed like a blessing at the time. The pain of those who had lost their mates was unparalleled, although I have never seen more fierce fighters than those males who fought in the first battles against the Orkun. They weren’t warriors—they were farmers, merchants, tradesmen, all of whom had lost wives and daughters and who wanted nothing more than to charge into battle screaming, drawing whatever Orkun blood they could.
A great many of them are gone now. And it’s their memory that I’ve fought for as much as the men I’ve lost, and the memory of all those who died before. I gave up on the idea of the Kalix we once had, committing myself fully to my new life as a warrior with only one mission, the mission our prince and our commander gave us.
We are all marked for death now. Our race will die with us. So take every last godsforsaken Orkun with you before you go.
I haven’t let the belief that I would never find a mate keep me from physical pleasure. I wasn’t lying when I joked with Tycran that I’ve found my way into the beds of many females across the universe, although I did exaggerate just a little. Over the past few years, as I went from space port to space port working to weaken the Orkun defenses wherever I could, I enjoyed the company of plenty of females along the way.
I’m no stranger to a woman’s arms. No stranger to lust or pleasure or desire.
But I’ve never felt anything like this.
And that, more than anything else, is what tells me that this bond is real. Because what I feel for Nadia isn’t the shallow lust of a man looking to pass an evening with a beautiful alien woman. This is a need so deep that I could never have imagined it until I felt it. A need not just to discover the rest of her body, to enjoy the pleasures we can bring each other, but to claim her.
To keep her.
To make her mine.
To worship her endlessly and be devoted just to her.
Commander Tordax steps forward as Nadia’s sister pulls her back inside the palace, his face creased with concern.
“She is your Irisa?” he asks, clearly having overheard enough of the conversation to piece a good bit of it together.
I nod. “That’s all it can be. What I felt… I said the words to her, but it wasn’t conscious. They had to be said. It was like an impossible urge. I couldn’t have bitten them back if I tried.” I pause. “You were the first to bond with one of the Terran women, right?”
“Yes.” Tordax glances out at the landscape beyond the balcony, his horns gleaming in the moonlight. “On the ship where we were kept captive, and where we revolted and rescued them. My Irisa’s name is Rose.” He smiles with obvious pleasure when he says her name.
“And there have been several others, right?” I continue, pressing him for more information. “Since Nadia and her sister have been here?”
“Yes. Both among these women and also in another group that was rescued several weeks ago. There have been nine bonds, in total.”
“So why does her sister seem to think that—that I would force Nadia?” I can’t keep the frustration out of my tone. I’m more than a little insulted by the way the sister behaved toward me. “Doesn’t she know by now that we are an honorable people?”
“The women have all been treated well since they were rescued, and with respect,” Tordax assures me, but then he chuckles lightly. “Still, there has been some small resistance with a few of the women when the mate bonds were formed. You should ask Malav how his bonding went,” he adds, laughing. There’s amusement in his voice, as if fondly recalling some inside joke. “But all of those couples are deeply bonded now. It is inviolable and unbreakable, just as it always was with our own women, before the Orkun attack.”
“So why is she so distrustful? Nadia seemed ready to at least consider it, but her sister made that impossible.”
My voice is tight now, irritated. I want the chance to charm my mate, to win her over, but there’s now an obstacle that I didn’t expect. In the old days, even the bonds that seemed to come too soon after maturity or between mates who seemed like a bad fit at first were honored. Everyone knew that the bond always chose correctly.
“The Terrans don’t have these bonds,” Tordax explains. “The women aren’t accustomed to it in the way we are. Where they’re from, the process is very different. There’s a long period of getting to know one another before you even decide if you wish to consider mating for life. There’s a period of exclusivity and decision-making that they call “dating,” sometimes for years. And even then, once the mating ceremony is done, it is not inviolable. They say it is until death, but it’s often broken. So the women are sometimes distrustful of the bonds when they appear, unsure if they will last and suspicious of anything that comes so quickly and strongly.”
“That sounds complicated.”
I pause, looking out over the balcony and considering what Tordax has just said.
So Nadia’s sister objects to the quickness of it. I suppose that’s not entirely strange, I remember my parents talking quietly and disapprovingly about how quickly a very young couple were mated once, long ago. The difference is that in that case, no one stopped them—and no one would have. The disapproval was quiet and private, not public or enforced.
Nadia will expect time, seduction, getting to know me.
I can do that.
I will win her over, I think fiercely to myself, looking out over the skyline of the city that I’m grateful to have lived to see again. I will make her see how deeply I desire her. How much I will cherish her.
“Come back to the feast.” Tordax dips his chin, patting me on the arm.
“There’s plenty of time to go after your mate. Right now, there are many people who wish to see you.”
The unspoken words are clear. It wouldn’t do to appear ungrateful or dismissive of the honor I’ve been given. So I go back downstairs with Tordax, greeting other well-wishers, bowing before the king and queen and letting them know how grateful I am once again, and finally sitting and celebrating with my fellow warriors.
I hear the threads of gossip through the room, eyes on me not only because of the stories of my exploits and my unexpected return, but because of what a handful saw out on the balcony—that another Terran woman has been mated to a Kalixian.
But through it all, amidst all the talking and laughing and drinking, my mind keeps straying back to Nadia.
She looked so beautiful under the moonlight, her skin so pale and delicate that it practically glowed. I remember the way her eyes sparkled as she looked up at me, even through her nervousness, even through her uncertainty. She knew it deep down, as well as I do. And she would have come to terms with it in a moment, if only…
There’s so much I want to know about her. I want to know all of it. Who she was back on Terra, who she wishes to be now, her likes and dislikes and what brings her joy. I want to know her completely, intimately, as thoroughly as I possibly can. I want to make her mine in every way.
I meant what I told her sister, and Tordax as well. I would never force my mate. The choice is still hers, regardless of how I feel. But I’ll do whatever it takes to win her over.
Because Nadia is mine.
And I am hers.
7
Nadia
Brielle is quiet as we make our way back to our pod. I’m silent for the entire walk back, too, the burning in my cheeks receding in the crisp fall air as we hurry down the streets. Brielle keeps her hand on my elbow for a long time, as if she’s afraid I’ll turn around and go running back to the palace if she doesn’t.
