“What is it?”
“Kody, what are those?” Meadow’s voice is trembling.
“These?” I lift the bouquet for her inspection. “Just a little something I picked up in town.”
“Forget-me-nots,” she whispers. “You always said the name was stupid.”
“Maybe the name was but never the meaning. After all, there was never a time I forgot about you, Meadow.” I present the bouquet to her.
But unlike other women who have received flowers from me, Meadow doesn’t make a fuss over them. She immediately tosses them on the counter in lieu of something much more important.
Surging into my arms.
Wrapping her arms around my neck, Meadow pulls herself up enough so her lips can find mine. She presses her lips against mine sweetly at first before tracing the seam of them with her tongue. My lips part in surprised pleasure, and Meadow quickly takes advantage, drawing the bottom lip between her lips to suck on it a moment before completely fusing our mouths together.
I groan before wrapping my arms around her to hold her right where I want her—against me.
For long moments, neither of us move beyond shifting our heads slightly to deepen the kiss or to take a necessary breath. Finally, I pull my head back just a bit and rest it against hers. Gasping, I manage, “That’s a thank-you for flowers?”
“No,” she pants. “That’s for remembering the good and not hating me by having to remember the bad.”
“I don’t know if that’s possible,” I tell her. But something shifts next to my heart, a longing for those years that we didn’t have.
“Still, it’s nice to see tangible proof.”
“I just wanted to do something nice.”
Her fingers tug at my hair, making my insides quake. “It was more than nice.”
I clear my throat before pulling her gently against the erection straining my jeans. “Flower, I’m trying to be gentle. On the other hand, if you want to forget about that…”
Her pupils turn to pinpoints. “Maybe I should put the flowers in some water.” Her voice is breathless as she steps back and picks up her bouquet.
“And maybe I should feed you.”
“That’d be good since I practically ate mineral spirits in order to get the Kilz off my lips.”
Smacking my lips together, I make a face. “Well, now that you mention it, I was wondering what that taste was.”
Meadow throws a cut stem at me even as her slightly swollen lips twitch with amusement. Turning around, she quickly searches for and finds a pitcher. Sinking the flowers in, she leans over to smell them. Over the tops, her eyes open and meet mine. It’s as if the land has sucked all the air from my body. I feel my lungs inflate with something, but it’s not the natural cycle of oxygen shared with the plants, the trees, the earth. It’s something so purifying, I’m helpless. I want more, yet I’m afraid to take another hit.
Because it could give me everything even as it destroys me.
I just saw the soul of the woman who was somehow born to be mine despite the years and distance between us. And even as my heart rejoices, my mind cautions me because I don’t know where she’s at.
And she has to take that step to bring us closer.
Meadow
I moan. “This may be the best thing I’ve ever put in my mouth.”
Kody chokes on the drink of water he had just taken. “Seriously?”
I flush. Then, thinking about it, I don’t take back what I said. “What can I say? It might be about the right size, but it sure as hell didn’t have this same flavor.” Quickly, I dunk the huckleberry barbecue chicken wing into the extra sauce I coaxed out of our harried waiter a few moments ago.
Kody mumbles something under his breath before reaching over to grab one of the wings on the platter between us.
We’re at the lodge bar eating with a magnificent view of the Bigfork Lake in front of us. Somehow, we managed to get a seat up against the window where the lights from the lodge and the houses on the water reflect down, casting glows against the ripples of water.
When we got here, Kody wanted to take me to the more formal dining room, but I was captivated by the view as the dredges of the sun was setting.
I lift the glass of pinot noir to my lips and take a sip. “Have I said thank you yet?”
Kody stops massacring the chicken wing to ask, “For what?”
“For not pushing when you know you could have? For not asking the questions I know you have? For being an amazing man?”
Dropping the half-eaten wing to his plate, he wipes his fingers on his napkin and uses a wet wipe before reaching for mine. Lacing them together, he tugs me forward. “Meadow, I’m not going to pretend like I don’t know things.”
Even though my heart’s hammering, I respond calmly, “I figured you might.”
“It’s been four weeks since we came back into each other’s lives. It’s been years of silence. We have a lot of time to work our way up to the answer of what happened in the years in between.”
Before I can stop myself, the words are out of my mouth. “How about we tackle one per date?”
“One for you and one for me?” Kody’s work-roughened fingers begin stroking in between mine, the sensation sending off signals to my long-neglected clit. God, if the man’s hands ever got in that region, I might go off like a sparkler on the Fourth of July.
God bless America.
“I like that idea. This way, we can move past barriers without fear. When did you get so smart?”
“Is that your question?” I tease.
“Just making an observation, Ms. Borneman.” He lifts my hand to his lips and brushes his lips across it. “Can I go first?”
“Sure.” I figure Kody has the right to ask me anything he wants.
“Why didn’t you take your name back after the divorce? Why did you stay Meadow Borneman?” His lips brush over the indent where my rings rested that’s slowly easing as the days pass.
“Does it bother you?”
“Is that your question?” His face doesn’t reveal the answer one way or the other.
I shake my head to indicate no, it isn’t before I give him the answer he’s looking for. “If it was just me, I’d have paid any amount of money to have removed his name from me. But I left it as is because of the kids.”
Kody appears frustrated.
“Hey, what is it?”
“I want to ask you more, but we said one question each.”
I dip my head in rueful acknowledgment. “I think this is getting to know each other on a deeper level, Mr. Laurence. If learning about each other isn’t so cut-and-dried, then we ask questions, we give answers.”
“That’s fair.”
“I’d like to think you’ll answer the same way when it’s your turn.”
“I’d like to think I don’t have secrets,” he counters.
I reach over and pat his cheek condescendingly. “That’s so sweet, and I bet if I asked anyone who knew you—and there are plenty around—they’d tell me otherwise.”
He pales. “Christ, this was such a good date.”
I giggle just as our server comes up to remove our appetizer and plates. When he does, Kody leans forward. “Why would you have cut so much history out of your life? You—” He swallows hard before he forces the word out. “—loved him a long time.”
I give myself a moment to think of the best way to explain it. And all of our hard work at Nature’s Song flashes through my mind. “You know how possessive you were of Nature’s Song when you saw the damage to it? There was a piece of your soul tied to it, even after all the years, despite the misuse?”
“Yes.”
“That’s how I feel about Mitch.” Kody rears back as if I’ve slapped him. I squeeze his hands hard and try to make him understand. “We’re bound, Kody. We have children, the most indelible tie there is. From now until the end of time, we’ll share memories with them—providing he can prove himself to be the father he used to be with them. And be
fore all the lies and the games, he was a good one. He was an important part of Elise and MJ’s lives, and for their sakes, I hope like hell he can get over…” I release Kody’s hand to wave mine in the air. “Whatever this selfish bullshit is. Otherwise, he’ll lose them.”
“He’s doing a bang-up job.”
“Aren’t we both?” The devastation of the last few weeks lives in my words. But I finish with, “But in short, I kept my name not to alienate my children.”
I sit back and take a long drink of wine.
Kody slides off his stool and comes around the table. “I think that’s one of the most courageous things I’ve heard you do for your children when your own pain could have led you to be destructive. You could have withered; instead you sought out the sun. Just like any flower would.” Bending down, he brushes his lips against mine. He moves back to his side of the table, leaving me reeling.
“For months, I’ve had questions and uncertainty running through my head about everything. And it seems like everyone I’ve talked with has an opinion that differs from my own. For just a moment to have someone support something I’ve done means everything.”
Flame that has nothing to do with the flickering candle between us leaps into Kody’s eyes. “I haven’t walked in your shoes. What right do I have to play judge and jury? And really, let’s be honest. I just wanted to know if I was facing competition from your ex.” The wicked leer he shoots me sends me into gales of laughter just as our mains arrive.
I’m dabbing tears from my eyes. “Oh, Kody, if you only knew…”
“Knew what?”
I smile but don’t answer. His time for questions is over. Just as he takes a bite into his burger, I ask innocently, “So, is it really true you’re friends with all your exes?”
Kody begins coughing as the bite of food goes down the wrong way. “Where in sweet hell did you hear that?”
“Maris, of course.”
“Damn. That means she heard it from only one person.”
And together, we both say, “Jed.”
Pushing back his burger, he demands, “Do you really want to hear this?”
I fork up a bite of my salmon and nod. “Kody, I was with the same man for a long time. And you know what’s terrible?”
“What?” Eyeing his burger like it might be his salvation, he braves another bite.
“Every time your name was mentioned, I think I missed you more than I missed him. Me and you? Well, we were…special.”
“Meadow?”
“Yes?”
“While I’ll admit I’ve never ended a past relationship poorly, I don’t plan on ever being your friend ever again. Ever.” His voice rasps out the last word, penetrating sea-colored eyes pinning me in place.
I squirm in my chair, certain I’m either having a heart attack or an orgasm. Either one is a likelihood.
His sexy laugh floats between us. “I’m certain you’d know if it was a heart attack, and I’m damn certain I’d know if it was an orgasm. Now, let’s finish up and get out of here.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice.” I chunk off a bite of salmon and hold it to his lips.
He accepts the bite. “Delicious. But not quite the taste I want in my mouth right now.”
Forget the heart attack. I know damn well the pounding of my heart is due to the ache between my legs.
On the drive back, I’ve been amusing Kody as I sing along to the ’90s channel on his satellite radio. After a while, my voice drifts off when I realize how many songs I’ve sung along to reminded me of Kody and the nights we spent at the Smiths’ instead of the early memories of my marriage.
“What are you thinking so hard about over there?”
“It’s amazing how it took being forced to break away for me to realize I wasn’t happy—and not just with my marriage. In so many ways, there were things wrong with my life in Juneau, but it took the worst kind of experience for me to be able to make a change. What does that say about the woman I am?”
“That you’re human,” he replies simply before reaching for my hand. “You said it yourself at dinner, if it was just you, maybe you would have taken a chance a lot sooner. Don’t blame yourself for not doing so now. If we all had the ability to look back and make different decisions, don’t you think there are those I wouldn’t choose to do over?”
“What would you do differently?”
“There’s two that will haunt me.” Kody’s voice sounds hollow.
Whoa. This wasn’t what I was expecting. I reach over and turn down the radio, thinking Britney isn’t the best background for this. “Will you share them?”
His hand tightens on mine. “The first is never going to see Jed in Florida. He asked time and again. If I could have broken away, he would have been so happy. Did he resent having to come to us? Did he understand it was always just about poor timing? And now that I know everything, how many lives would have changed?”
“Oh, Kody.” My heart aches. “I don’t doubt for a minute Jed loved you.”
“Did I tell you he gave me a gift certificate to stay here at Nature’s Song?” For just a moment, there’s a wholly amused smile on his face. “I can just see bringing the guys back for a reunion and having you at our beck and call.”
I try to tug my hand away. “Now, that’s just cruel. Why would you end a perfectly lovely evening by ruining it that way?”
Kody laughs. “I don’t think even Jed could have planned this, sweetheart. Despite his machinations with Jennings and Kara, there’s no way he could have foreseen this.”
“True.” Then, “You’d come back after you leave?” I whisper almost inaudibly.
My comment has the desired effect. Kody growls. “Oh, yeah.”
Silence envelops us for a few moments while I dream of what could happen if Kody came back. Then he wipes my mind blank with his next words. “My other regret should be obvious by now, I imagine. I waited too long to ask a beautiful woman out, and she slipped through my fingers.” He slants a glance in my direction while I gape at him. “I’m trying not to screw up my second chance.”
I’m almost numb even as my body absorbs the rush of feeling everything. He hasn’t let go of my hand, but now even that simple touch has me wanting more, wanting him. And what’s even more precious than that is believing I’m worthy of it.
In a thousand different ways since I first knew Kody, I convinced myself this would never happen. First, he was destined for so much more than I could be; then I was married. But since we’ve met here as equals, I’ve never questioned the force of emotions that keeps trying to grow between us.
“Maybe it’s finally our time,” I say aloud in the darkened vehicle.
“Maybe it is. Are you ready for it?” He brings my hand to his lips, not to soothe but something else. Something I shied away from years ago.
Kody Laurence wants me. And the hell of it is, I’ve wanted him back.
As we pull up to the gate at Nature’s Song, I lean forward. “Yes. Are you?”
The security lights give just enough light into the car so I can see the strain on his handsome face. “I’ve been waiting a long time, Meadow.”
As soon as the gate’s open, Kody drops my hand to turn his attention to driving. Making the turn off to my house, we’re soon pulling up to my door.
But my mind is made up.
I want this man any way he’ll have me for as long as it will last.
Tonight’s a good start.
Meadow
“Would you like to come in for a few?”
Kody turns off the engine. His probing gaze finds mine before he nods. “Wait and I’ll be around to help you down.”
He slides out of the cab, and my blood begins pumping through my veins so hard I can feel it, hear it. I’m overheating just at the idea of us alone.
As the door is opened, the cool night air blasting me is a welcome reprieve. “Thanks.”
His eyes narrow, until I feel like I’m nothing more than his prey. “You’re welcome
.”
I let us both inside before shrugging off my coat. I’m immediately drawn to the flowers Kody gave me a few hours before. “Honestly, I’m not sure what I have beyond wine, water, coffee. Does any of that work for you?” Is that my voice all high-pitched and squeaky? Nerves come at me out of nowhere.
Each metallic zip of his jacket coming undone holds me in place as surely as if he’d drawn his hands across my skin. “Or if none of that works…” My voice trails off as I feel Kody’s hands shift my hair aside before his lips nuzzle the nape of my neck. My head bows forward, exposing even more skin, more of my soul.
Kody’s lips trail down over each vertebra while his hands grip my arms firmly. His hands are the only thing preventing from falling down with the sensations rioting through me.
When his teeth graze in the hollow between my shoulder and my neck, my head falls back against his. When I twist my face upward to kiss him, we’re so close we’re breathing in the other’s whispers and dreams so they land perfectly where the other needs them—safely in the other’s heart.
Kody spins me in his arms before backing me up against the wood pole in the foyer. “All I want is you.” His calloused fingers drag through my hair, occasionally catching, until they wind up over the pounding of my heart. “Do you want me?”
I thread my fingers into his reddish-gold hair and tug his head down. “Yes.” Such a simple word for such an overwhelming need.
Kody braces an arm on the column above me, wrapping the other around my waist. Hauling me against his body, I shiver when I feel the contours of his erection against my leggings. “Thank fucking God. I was starting to develop Flower Power again.”
I sputter, “What the hell is Flower Power?”
He thrusts his hips against mine, and I let out a soft moan.
Kody puts his lips to my ear before sharing something so earthy, so male, something that makes my insides quiver even as I feel my knees weaken. “It means grabbing a hold of my own dick and pretending it was your hands on me.”
Oh. My. God.
Return by Land (Glacier Adventure Series Book 2) Page 17
