by Kate Forster
He noticed that her eyes sparkled when she had a good idea. First it was the beds for the spare room, then when she said they should stay, and now with hunting down some justice for Rachel, a girl she hardly knew but who needed someone on her side for the first time in her life.
‘What about your dad? Did he leave a will?’
The spark left Clara’s face and she seemed to be searching for an answer.
‘No. I mean it was complicated…’ Her voice trailed away.
‘How so?’ Henry encouraged.
But Clara shook her head. ‘I can’t really talk about him – it’s sort of hard.’
Clara seemed nervous but he wasn’t sure why.
‘Of course. But you know you can tell me anything.’
Clara looked down at the papers on the table. ‘I know but I can’t yet. I don’t know if I ever can.’
‘You don’t have to do anything,’ he said. ‘But if you want to, if you feel it will give you some sense of ease if you put it down and share it with someone, a friend, instead of carrying it around, then I would like to take the load for a while if you’d let me.’
Clara said nothing and went back to her paperwork. He watched her work for a while, wondering what was so big that she couldn’t share it with him. He had told her everything about his simple life and yet, he felt there was a huge shadow between them, something that stopped her from moving towards him.
‘Clara?’
She looked up at him.
‘Whatever it is you want to tell me, I will listen, and I won’t judge you. I couldn’t. So when you’re ready to tell me, when and if you’re ready, I will be here, okay?’
She nodded and he could see her eyes were shining with tears.
‘I feel like there is nothing we couldn’t tell each other.’
Clara put her head down. ‘That’s not true though – we all have dark secrets.’
Henry nodded. ‘Yes, but some of them aren’t so scary if we bring them into the light once in a while.’
He saw a tear drop onto her hand and his heart hurt.
‘Maybe,’ she said.
‘Whenever you want to tell me, Clara, I will be here. I won’t run, if that’s what you’re thinking.’
Her eyes lifted to meet his. ‘Is that true though? Will you be here? What is even happening between us?’
He paused and thought for a moment.
‘I don’t know but I know I can’t wait to start work every morning. I know you make me laugh and you make me think. I know I want to impress you and I know I haven’t felt this way since I met Naomi.’
He saw her face soften.
‘Is this really happening between us? Is it okay? Can it happen when I’m paying you?’ she asked.
He shrugged. ‘So don’t pay me.’
‘I’m not not paying you,’ she said. ‘That’s ridiculous. That’s not what I meant.’
‘I know, I just wanted you to know that this—’ he gestured to them both ‘—has never happened before. I have never, ever had feelings for my clients, except maybe harbouring bad feelings towards idiots but you are something entirely new. I don’t know that I quoted for falling for you.’
Clara’s mouth dropped open at his words.
‘Did you just say you were falling for me?’
He nodded, almost surprised at his words. Clara made him want to tell her the truth. He just wished she could share her truth with him.
He saw she was blushing now and she bit her lip, stifling a smile.
‘So, tell me what you want?’ he asked.
‘Now? Tomorrow? Sometime soon?’ she teased.
‘All of the above.’
Clara gathered the papers and put them into a neat stack and put her pen on top.
‘Now? I want to go to bed and sleep. Tomorrow, I want to solve the issues with Rachel’s father’s papers and at some point in the future, as I have told you, I would like chickens and a pet dog.’
She walked to the door of the kitchen.
‘Just for the record, I’m falling for you too, but I worry we are each other’s rebound relationship.’
But Henry shook his head. ‘You are not a rebound. A rebound is when a person is using someone else to try and unlove another. I will never not love Naomi; she’s the mother of my daughter. I could have dated, I could have sent Pansy to my parents and slept with random women, I could have done many things but I didn’t because I didn’t want to, because I didn’t meet anyone who lights up my life like you, Clara. So, you aren’t a rebound for me and since you never loved Giles, I don’t think this is a rebound for you either, but it’s worth exploring isn’t it?’
He saw her hand grab the doorframe and then a slow smile spread across her face.
‘You are something else, Henry Garnett, I tell you that much.’
‘A good something else?’ He laughed.
‘Better than good,’ was all she said before she left him alone in the kitchen.
31
The next morning, Clara was up and dressed and ready to face the day. Her moment with Henry the night before had given her a new energy that she hadn’t felt before, not even with Piles.
Pansy was soon up, as was Henry, and the three of them chatted with ease in the kitchen. The electricity between her and Henry was addictive, and at times, she stood a little too close just to feel the friction. She wanted him. It was simple and yet complicated, as she knew Henry wasn’t ready for the next move; him admitting he had feelings for her was huge in itself.
Part of her worried he would never be ready for them to be together but she had time, and she wasn’t about to rush anything – besides, she had to help Rachel.
‘I’m heading to Salisbury library today, and I thought you might want to come with me, Pansy. We can read some books and visit a very good toy shop they have there.’
Pansy pleaded with Henry to go, who rolled his eyes.
‘I really don’t think I have a say in it,’ he said to Clara. ‘I’ll put her seat in your car.’
They caught each other’s eyes and her stomach flipped.
‘Thank you.’
Pansy was dancing between them, discussing what toy she might like to get before Henry told her to go and find her shoes and put them on.
‘I haven’t had any long periods of time without her since Naomi died,’ he said. ‘The other day when you went to Rachel’s was the first time in three years we haven’t been together.
Clara felt herself frown. ‘What do you mean? You’ve never been apart?’
Henry sighed. ‘Never. At first she wanted to be with me all the time, which I understood, but then I guess I wanted her with me all the time also, so now we have this weird co-dependent thing and I know she needs to have other people. My parents have asked for two years to have her to stay but I couldn’t do it.’
Clara nodded, trying to understand, and she thought of her own mother.
Piles had said they were co-dependent but when there was no one else to depend on, it made sense to want to only be with each other.
‘I will look after her, Henry, I promise.’
He shrugged and put his hands up. ‘I know you will. And she knows also – that’s why she wants to go. She always says no to other people but she didn’t even miss a beat today.’
The privilege of Pansy and Henry’s trust wasn’t lost on her and she took Henry’s rough hand in hers.
‘Thank you,’ she said.
‘And thank you for not judging me. I know it’s not healthy but being here at the cottage, I don’t know, it’s kind of healing us both.’
Pansy exploded into the room with her shoes on the wrong feet, a sun hat on her head and pink feather boa.
‘Wow, that’s perfect for town,’ said Clara. ‘Exactly what I would have worn if I had a feather boa.’
Pansy looked smug as she walked out to the car and climbed into her seat.
Soon they were on their way to the village in Clara’s car.
‘We just have to stop in
and see a friend of mine,’ said Clara.
She parked the car and walked up the path and knocked on the door that opened almost immediately.
‘Good morning, Tassie, I’m heading into—’
‘Yes, I know,’ said Tassie. ‘Let me get my handbag.’
The old woman shuffled to the hall table and picked up an old-fashioned bag. Clara smiled when she saw Tassie was wearing pink lipstick.
‘How did you know I was coming to see if you wanted to come to Salisbury?’ Clara asked, trying to see if Tassie had a hidden camera somewhere.
‘I had an itchy stomach all last night and woke this morning to a bumblebee in kitchen, so I knew something good was coming and I needed to be prepared.’
‘I like your lipstick,’ said Clara, meaning every word. The lipstick added much-needed colour to Tassie’s tiny face and she had little pearl earrings on that Clara was sure she hadn’t seen before.
‘I thought I should look nice for whoever came to the door, even if it was the reaper – at least I would go dressed and ready.’
Clara laughed as Tassie closed the door and handed her house keys to Clara to lock the door.
‘We have another passenger. Pansy is the daughter of the man who is helping me fix up the cottage.’
She opened the car door and helped Tassie get into the car then ran around to the driver’s side and put Tassie’s seatbelt on for her.
‘This is a fancy car,’ said Tassie to Pansy in the back.
‘It’s red,’ said Pansy. ‘Red cars go fastest.’
‘That’s wonderful to know,’ said Tassie, sounding sincere. Clara saw Pansy nodding as though she knew a great many things she was ready to share with Tassie.
‘Your man is the one with the little house on wheels?’ asked Tassie.
‘Yes,’ said Clara amazed. ‘How did you know? More and more I think you’re the witch of Merryknowe.’
Tassie giggled. ‘Don’t be ridiculous, there are at least three of us in the county.’
Clara wasn’t sure if she was serious or not but didn’t ask.
They drove along the roads towards Salisbury, and Tassie told Clara the history of the druids in the area.
‘They loved oak trees; would meet under them and do their druid business. You have a great oak on your land. There were many more oaks surrounding the cottage but there are only a few left now, aren’t there? I haven’t been to Acorn Cottage in years.’
Clara made a mental note to take Tassie to the cottage as soon as possible.
‘A great oak?’ she asked as she drove along the road, the sunshine lighting up the countryside so it looked as though it was a postcard.
Tassie was still chatting. ‘In olden times oak trees were thought to be magic. I remember my mother saying that some of the gypsy women would put acorns under their pillow if they wanted to have a baby.’
‘Acorns under your pillow would be uncomfortable.’ Clara laughed. ‘I have to go to the library and then we can do what we like,’ said Clara to Tassie as she found a park at the front of the library building.
Tassie smiled. ‘I don’t mind what we do. I haven’t left Merryknowe for three years, so just seeing everything is marvellous.’
Three years without leaving the village was ridiculous, Clara thought as she wound down the windows of the car. Three years since Henry and Pansy had been apart. Three years since Naomi died. So much was happening all at once and Clara wondered why it was all happening now but she couldn’t explain it and didn’t want to try. It just felt right. She glanced at Pansy in the rear-view mirror.
Tassie was clutching her handbag on her lap and happily staring out the window as though everything was new to her eye.
Tassie’s loneliness would be the next thing she dealt with after Rachel. Goodness, whoever said that life in Merryknowe would be boring was very wrong indeed. Clara came for a slow life and ended up being busier than ever and she wouldn’t have changed it for the world.
32
After Clara and Pansy left on their adventure, Henry felt lost without them.
Their breakfast had been as cheery and chatty as ever, but there was a new energy in the cottage between him and Clara.
They stood close at the counter when they made tea, and sometimes, when she leaned across him, he felt the softness of her breast against his arm and he thought he might die of desire.
Was she teasing him? He wasn’t sure but God, he wanted her. He ached for her. All night he had lain in the room next to her, wondering if she was thinking about him.
Now she was gone with his daughter and he looked around the cottage. He wanted it to be everything she and her mum had dreamed of and more.
Getting in the truck he headed out past Merryknowe and into the deep country until he found the turn-off and drove up a country lane and there was the white farmhouse. He parked the truck and walked up to the gate with a sign that said.
Please shut the gate as the chickens like to explore and the foxes like it when they do.
He smiled and shut the gate behind him as a woman came out and waved at him.
‘Hi, Henry, I haven’t seen you in forever.’
‘Hi, Julia, yes it’s been ages,’ he said as she walked up and embraced him for a long time.
Julia had been one of the palliative care nurses who cared for Naomi. She was there through the long nights and there at the end and had stayed in touch with Henry through emails over the years.
Since she had retired, she had started breeding chickens and ducks and had made a name for herself for breeding high-quality birds and all the necessary items for the chickens and ducks.
‘How is Pansy?’ asked Julia, after they hugged.
‘Hilarious, never-ending energy, so like Naomi and so much herself if that makes sense.’
‘I think of you two often. I wished there was a better ending for you all.’
Henry shrugged. ‘It has been tough but things are getting better, or maybe they’re just different.’
‘So, have you finally settled down and found a place and want some birds?’ Julia asked as they wandered towards the enclosure where the sound of the chickens grew louder. ‘Naomi and I often talked about the chickens she wanted. I am glad you’re doing it.’
‘It’s for a friend – she really wants some chickens. She’s just bought a place in Merryknowe,’ he said.
He felt Julia’s eyes on him and he knew he was turning red. Would she think less of him if she knew his feelings for Clara?
Always intuitive, as most palliative care nurses are, she touched his arm.
‘I am glad, Henry, you deserve a second chance. Naomi didn’t want you to be alone your whole life.’
‘Didn’t she?’ Henry was surprised. ‘She never mentioned it to me.’
‘It is quite common. She knew it was incurable and she knew she was close to the end but she was also very stubborn and didn’t want to admit it.’
‘You are so right about that,’ said Henry, scuffing the ground with his boot.
‘But she said she hoped you would find love again, because she thought you were very good at being married, and not everyone is. She said you like showing people love through actions.’
Henry shook his head. ‘I wish she had told me this.’
‘Would it have made a difference?’ Julia asked.
Henry looked out across the fields and felt the breeze on his face and he scratched his beard. ‘I don’t know, but I am glad I know now.’
‘When we are ready we find out what we need to know,’ Julia answered and then clapped her hands. ‘Now let’s get your girl some birds.’
He didn’t explain about Clara. He didn’t need to explain her to anyone; he just wanted to make her happy and he knew this would make her more than happy.
Two hours later, Henry was back at the cottage with six hens, which were in a box, and he had started assembling the chicken coop.
It was shaped like a small castle, complete with a tower. Usually Henry would have made somet
hing for the chickens but he knew the designs from Julia and the kits were perfect and whimsical for Clara and he didn’t have much time.
The more he got to know Clara, the more he saw her magic. She had a kindness and need to improve people’s lives but in a joyful way, not demanding they change for her benefit. She could make anyone laugh; she was straight, direct and still kind. She would have been an excellent bank manager but he was glad she was here.
He ran chicken wire around the bottom of the coop to protect the birds from the foxes and set up the nesting boxes, lining them with fresh hay.
Finally, the coop was finished and Henry put the chickens into the coop and closed the door.
One last thing – he went to the van and managed to squeeze under the crushed roof and pulled out Naomi’s paint box. He went back to the coop and thought for a moment before he painted on the door with slow careful strokes and then stepped back and smiled.
The sound of the chickens pottering in their new environment made him smile and he looked around at the messy, overgrown, wild garden and the cottage with the blue tarpaulin on the roof, and a van with a tree crushing the roof, and thought he hadn’t felt this happy since before Naomi became sick.
He checked the time and realised it was nearly mid-afternoon. He wanted to make Clara and Pansy dinner, so he went into the cottage and went up to shower, and soon he was back in the kitchen, pottering as he prepared dinner for them all.
Thankfully the tree had crushed the end of the van, so he could get to the refrigerator and freezer. He pulled out some items for him to make his perfect vegetable curry with pappadums and coconut rice.
He turned on some music on his phone and put it in an empty glass to work as a speaker then chopped the sweet potato, cauliflower florets, carrots and tomatoes.
He hummed along to the music as he fried off the onion and garlic in the frying pan and opened a beer from the fridge while the vegetables sweated in the heavy pan.
He couldn’t wait for Clara and Pansy to come home, and he occasionally checked out the front to see if they had returned.
