“But it just can’t work that way,” she said. “It’s complicated magic, and it needs power. It takes power from the magical connection that wolves feel to the pack and the alpha feels to his mate. I can’t tie it to something else.”
“Why not?”
“I just can’t,” she said. “Some things are impossible.”
Landon eyed me. “I think she’s telling the truth.”
“So, what do we do?” I said.
“I don’t know,” he said. “Get the spell anyway. Maybe it would work long enough for you to get back to the city to get Waterfield?”
“But even if I can honor the deal with the bloods, that’s only a temporary fix. The vampires will make more bloods.”
“Will they? Without Waterfield?”
“I…” I bit my lip. “I don’t know. Don’t they have other scientists?”
“Sure, but he’s the mastermind,” said Landon.
Vivia lowered her head, and her lips started to move.
“Hey!” growled Landon, tugging on her arm. “None of that.”
Vivia cried out in pain and she stopped doing the spell. She collapsed into sobs.
I knelt down in front of her. “Okay, you broke my pack, so you tell me how to fix it. If Judah and I can never have a strong bond, then how can the pack have a protection spell?”
“It… it can’t,” she said.
“Wrong answer,” I said.
She flinched. “Maybe… maybe you could mate with someone else.”
“No, that’s not happening,” I said. “I’m not taking Judah’s pack away from him.”
“Well… you might be able to mate with someone who wasn’t a werewolf,” she said. “A human mate.”
“What?” I said. “Humans don’t have mating bonds.”
“Exactly,” she said. “You would have a tie to that human, but you’d still technically be bonded to Judah. The spell, however, could feed on your tie to your human mate.”
I sat back, swallowing. Why did everything depend on me having sex with some guy? That was crap.
“It would be difficult,” said Vivia, “but I could make the spell dependent on your bond to another mate. I could make it work.”
Then I had a funny thought. “Would it have to be a human?”
“Well, it couldn’t be another wolf. That wouldn’t work,” she said. “If it were an alpha wolf, you’d sever your tie with Judah. If it were a typical wolf, you wouldn’t be able to mate, just like Judah and Tempest can’t.”
“Not human,” I said. “Not a wolf. Something else.”
“Camber,” said Landon in strangled voice. “You know that’s impossible.”
I looked up at him. “Maybe… I don’t know… if we had a lot of silver chains or… it only has to be once.”
Vivia suddenly started laughing. “Oh. Why didn’t I see this before? Of course. You came in here, angry that she was mated, bloodhound. And now—”
“Could it work?” I said to Vivia.
“You can’t mate with a bloodhound,” said Vivia, shaking her head at me. “He’d kill you.”
“She’s right,” said Landon. “I would never—”
“But if we could get around it,” I said. “There’s nothing that makes a bloodhound different than a human mate?”
“I suppose not,” said Vivia. “But it’s still not possible.”
“Do the spell,” I said. “Do it, and I’ll figure out the rest of it later.”
Landon slapped the tape over Vivia’s mouth. He took me by the arm and dragged me out of the room, shutting Vivia in behind us.
“Landon, listen,” I said. “I know you think it couldn’t work—”
“Stop,” he said, tugging me to the other side of the room, out of earshot of Vivia. He let go of me. “Okay,” he said. “I know that we both said there was not going to be anything here.” He gestured back and forth between us. “But, you know, I think when I said that, I was kind of operating on this idea that you were in this sexless mating bond with the dog, and now you’re going to have to have a strong bond with some human and—”
“Landon, no, I’m not—”
“I know your pack is important to you,” he said. “I know it. But if you broke the bond to the pack, it wouldn’t be important anymore, you know? So, would you just consider not being mated to Judah?”
“The only way to be unmated is to mate with someone else,” I said. “Well… I guess if Judah died—”
“Good. Fine. We’ll kill him.”
“I’d still be the alpha of the pack,” I said. “I’d still need to protect them. And I’d just have to mate again. They wouldn’t let me stay unmated.”
He swallowed, squaring his shoulders. “Right. Right, of course it would be like that. It’s stupid, anyway. I don’t have any claim… and you should be happy—”
“Landon.” I grabbed his hand. “If we could mate—”
“We can’t.”
“You’re not even willing to try?” I said.
“You know what happens to me,” he said. “You saw me in Viggo’s room.”
“You didn’t break the chains until after you were yourself again, though,” I said. “And all we need is… when Judah and I mated—”
“Are you seriously going to talk about that?”
“It was fast,” I said.
“Well, that figures. He seems like he’d be awful in bed.”
“It wasn’t even… I mean we didn’t even take off all our clothes. It was just, you know, kind of businesslike. So, I think if you and I could just get the mechanics down—”
“Camber, you would be dead. No.”
“But—”
“No.”
I started to say something else, but the expression on his face told me that he wasn’t going to listen to an argument. I raised my chin. Fine. I would work on him. I’d get him to try it.
“You told your sister you wouldn’t have anything else to do with me anyway,” he said softly.
“I… I did,” I said. But she would understand. It wasn’t just for me, it was for the pack. Well… maybe she wouldn’t understand. Whatever. I’d deal with Desta later.
“So, you won’t have anything to do with me,” said Landon. “You’ll find a human, and you’ll mate with him, and that’ll be it. Because you can’t leave your pack, and you need that spell for protection, and…” He nodded. “Yeah, a human. “That’s what you’ll do.”
“Landon—”
“Let’s go get Vivia to do this spell.”
* * *
We were worried that Vivia wouldn’t actually do a protection spell for the pack, but that she would do something that hurt us. We made her explain how the spell worked. She said that she would cast the spell on me, and that as soon as she was done, it would go into effect.
So, we called the pack. We got one of the wolves to stand on the outside of the village and to stay on the phone with us as the spell was going on. That way, we’d know if Vivia was tricking us. One hint that the spell wasn’t actually working, and we’d make good on that threat to start tearing off her limbs.
Vivia did the proper spell.
We confirmed that with the wolf on the phone, and then we hung up.
Then left Vivia there, telling her that she should be grateful we were going to let her go.
We sped away in the car we’d stolen from the vampires, and we headed back to the pack’s village.
As we drove, I tried to think of what I could say to convince Landon to try to mate with me. I couldn’t think of anything. I thought of his objections, and I wondered if I was being an idiot. I mean, maybe it really was impossible. Maybe there was no way that he could do it without hurting me.
I wasn’t suicidal and I didn’t want to be badly maimed.
I knew it was a risk. If there was some way to make it safe, though, then it would solve all the problems. And it was what I wanted.
Yeah, I wanted Landon. I didn’t know when it had started, exactly. I wasn’t su
re if I had always wanted him, ever since I met him all those years ago, or if it had started in the woods, after I’d shifted the first time, when I’d found myself noting his feral attractiveness. I knew that it didn’t make sense. I knew that I had no real reason to want Landon. He was rude sometimes and he made me crazy the rest of the time.
But…
Well, there was really no use denying it.
“When we get there, I want you to stay,” I said.
“Huh?” said Landon.
“Stay with the pack,” I said. “Stay with me. I’ll move out of Judah’s place. I’ll have to. And then you and I, we can—”
“I don’t think so,” he said.
“Landon—”
“What do you want me to say? You want me to say that I want to play house with you, because I don’t.”
I rolled my eyes. “You can’t take it all back now. You care about me. I care about you.”
“Exactly. I care about you. So, that’s why it’s better if I stay as far away from you as I possibly can. Because you make it way too easy for me to lose control.”
Why did that statement make a little thrill go through me? It wasn’t a good thing. But it was still somehow exciting to know how much I affected him.
“Besides,” he continued, “you’ll be mating with a human soon—”
“No, I won’t,” I said. “I’m not doing that again. No more sex with some guy because it’s destiny or because it’s for the good of the pack. I deserve better than that.”
“Putting yourself above the pack, huh? That’s not what a good alpha does.”
“Oh, what would you know about being a good alpha?”
He shrugged.
“Fine,” I said. “You don’t have to stay with me. But you do need to stay with the pack. We’ll live in separate houses. How’s that?” Maybe Sinead would want to live with me. That would be fun.
“I don’t think the pack would want me there.”
“So, where will you go?”
“Don’t worry about it,” he said.
“You can’t roam the woods by yourself.”
“Why not?”
“Because you just can’t. You need a home, and I want you to have one with me. I don’t want to think of you out there on your own.”
“So, don’t think of me,” he said. “Forget about me.”
“Oh, like that’s going to happen.”
“It will,” he said. “The only reason that things have gotten so weird with us is because I haven’t stayed away. But now you can go back to your pack and stay in your spelled village, and you’ll be safe. So, I can let you be on your own.”
“You’re going to leave me?”
“It’s the best thing for everyone.”
“No, it’s not,” I said. “It’s the worst thing. Landon, we just got news that we could be together. All this time, it’s been impossible, and now there’s a possibility—”
“There’s really not a possibility, though,” he said. “Nothing’s changed.”
“I’m not giving up on this, you know,” I said.
“You’ll have to,” he said. “Because there’s no way that I would ever consent to trying to… to…” His voice dropped. “Be with you like that.”
“If I could find a way to make it safe, would you?”
“You can’t,” he said.
“If I find a way to make it safe, I will make you do it,” I said.
He let out a disbelieving laugh. “Oh, you’re more like your sister than I thought.”
That silenced me. I slumped down in my seat, and I felt horrible.
We drove in the quiet for a while.
Finally, I spoke up in a tiny voice. “It is because you’re afraid of hurting me, right? I mean, it’s not because you don’t want… because you don’t want me?”
“I don’t want you,” he said.
I felt as if I’d been slapped. I even gasped a little.
“This thing with us, it’s totally idiotic and insane,” he said. “And you’re… you’re bad for me. You get me into these situations that are detrimental to my safety and my happiness.”
“I’m sorry,” I said, wishing I could disappear into the seat.
“And I’m bad for you,” he said. “I keep you from being happy. Maybe you would have found a way to make it work with the dog if I hadn’t—”
“Don’t flatter yourself,” I said, angry now. “I was never going to have a thing with Judah. He lied to me about having a girlfriend, you know? And it’s not as if I took one look at you and was ruined for all other men. There’s nothing that special about you, Landon Bowie.”
He sucked in a noisy breath.
I winced. “Sorry, I didn’t mean—”
“Maybe you did,” he said.
“I didn’t.”
“Well, I did,” he said, tightening his grip on the steering wheel. “You’re bad for me. And I don’t want to be anywhere near you anymore.”
“You don’t have to push me away,” I said, and I was feeling dangerously near tears. I knew why he was saying these things, but it didn’t make it any better. It still hurt.
“That’s not what I’m doing,” he said. “I’m just trying to make things clear for you, okay? You’ll be happier without me, you’ll see. Maybe you don’t make it work with the dog, but you find some human, some nice guy without claws and teeth. A guy who’s not covered in fur. Someone, you know, you have a future with. Someone you can have babies with and grow old and all of that stuff.”
I hadn’t thought about the future with Landon, admittedly. The prospect of us together hadn’t been real until now, and I hadn’t had the chance to think everything through. I didn’t want children anytime soon, but if a future with Landon meant giving up the idea of children all together… I swallowed.
“See?” he said. “You’re starting to understand. We’re… we’re bad together. We don’t make sense. It’s better if it just stops now before it gets more complicated.”
“I don’t want you to disappear from my life,” I said. “You shouldn’t get to make that decision for both of us.”
“I’m not sticking around and watching you move on from me,” he said.
“I thought you didn’t want me,” I said softly. “What do you care?”
“Fine,” he said, shrugging. “I don’t care. I don’t give a damn. But because I don’t care, I don’t need to stick around and make sure you’re safe either. So, there’s really no reason for me to be near you.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
Landon and I drove for the rest of the trip in silence.
When we got to the pack village, I opened the door and got out, and he stared straight ahead.
“Landon?” I said, poking my head back in.
He didn’t look at me. “Let’s not make a thing of it, huh?”
“Wait, you’re just leaving now?”
“Yeah,” he said.
“So, this is goodbye?”
He nodded. He still wouldn’t look at me.
“Get out of the car. At least give me a hug or something.”
“I’m a bloodhound. We don’t hug.”
“Landon, you’re breaking my heart.”
“Good.” His voice cracked a little.
“Stop it,” I whispered.
He put the car in gear and backed up.
I barely had time to back away from the car. My door was still open and it swung wide and then slammed closed.
Landon turned the car around and drove off, squealing his tires.
I just gaped after him. What the hell? How had that just happened? Had he been an ass to me because he was trying to protect me, or was he just really an ass? And the things he’d said…
Blood and fangs.
Maybe he was right.
Maybe we didn’t make any sense.
I was so stunned and hurt that I couldn’t cry, and I wanted to cry.
“Camber?” came a voice.
I turned.
It was Sinea
d, making her way toward me. As she moved, the air shimmered, and the illusion around the village dropped, and I could see it behind her, spread out and welcoming. The village looked much better than the last time I’d seen it, when it had been a smoldering husk of itself. It wasn’t completely rebuilt, but it was definitely getting closer to the way it had been.
Behind Sinead was Ewan.
And as they approached, I felt my tie to both of them flare. Sinead was part of the pack.
She hugged me.
I was startled. I let my arms go around her. “You mated to Ewan.”
She pulled back. “You can just tell, huh?”
“I can feel you,” I said, sending a tendril through our bond to her. “Can you feel me?”
She nodded.
Ewan grinned at me. “Hey, there, Alpha Camber. They said you’d never come back, but I knew you would.”
I hugged Ewan too, even though we hadn’t really been huggers before.
“You’re not mad, right?” said Sinead. “About Ewan and me. I know you kept telling me not to rush into things, but it got to the point where it was harder not to mate than to stay apart, and…” She reached for him. He put his hand in hers and they gazed at each other adoringly. “We’re happy.”
“Then, how can I be mad?” I said, smiling.
Sinead turned back to me. “Who just drove away so fast?”
“I thought you were with that bloodhound,” said Ewan. “What’s his name? Logan?”
“Landon,” I said. “Yeah, he…” I blew out air, shaking my head. “You know what? Let’s not talk about him. There is no reason to talk about him.”
Sinead raised her eyebrows questioningly.
But Ewan just laughed. “All right, then. Come with us. We’ve been waiting for you. We want to welcome you home.”
I drew in a long breath. Home. Yes, this was home. I hadn’t realized how much I had missed this place. But now that I was back, I was whole in a way that I hadn’t been before.
I joined Ewan and Sinead, and we walked into the village.
As we made our way down the streets, people came out of their houses to see me, and I waved to them. Small children ran up to greet me happily, yelling, “She’s back, she’s back.”
I had never had such a welcome in my life. Never.
Many of the houses and buildings were still burned and damaged, but a good number had been repaired.
Blood Melody Page 11
