I got ready, and then went to find Bab’s. After a fig bar and some tea, we got right to it. I hadn’t truly considered how large the Dahlia was until I had to watch her clean it. I sincerely hoped she wasn’t the sole individual responsible for keeping up with it. I offered to help but she kept refusing every time I offered. To shut me up she began to tell me small details about the Dahlia’s history. I listened attentively, watching as she dusted the lower banister.
“It’s been many colors outside and in. Every generation has felt the need to spruce it up. This time around it had to be rebuilt. There was a fire that took most of it out. That’s when Mr. Andreou did another remodel to keep little Mason from finding trouble.”
“He raised him by himself?”
A pause. “Yes, he did. He was a good father. Still is a good father. He loves his son very much.”
“There was a nanny when Mason was just a boy, but things didn’t quite work out.”
She danced around my real question with ease. Where was his mother? He hadn’t reacted as if it were me the previous night. Then again, no one at that table behaved as if my arrival was out of the norm. Apart from Luca’s wife. She hadn’t uttered a word.
“Does everyone from dinner live here?” I asked next. I hadn’t seen a single other person the entire time she’d been cleaning. It was silent too. Just as it had been the day before when I arrived.
“Oh, gods no. Mason and Katie have their own home on the far, far side of the property. They do tend to stay in their room here on the nights he works.”
“What does he do?” I asked with more than a little interest.
“He has a demanding occupation.”
Well, that was dismissive and told me absolutely nothing.
I kept pushing. “He has a baby. I saw the monitor last night.”
She nodded. “He and Katie have twins. Adorable, perfect little angels.”
“And the others?”
“This way. I’ll just do the study and then the upper hall is my last bit for the day.”
She brushed past me carrying her cleaning organizer. “Declan, Ethan, and their sweet Helena have a home behind this one. It’s a nice walk by foot. Much easier to access by car. Luca and his wife pop in and out. There’s another brother too, Porter. He’s been traveling this last year or so. Securing a few expansion possibilities. For the most part it’s Mr. Andreou by his lonesome.”
We entered a room that had the lingering scent of the man I was trying not to obsess over. There was a small bar off to one side, well stocked with liquor. Babs went straight to it and began wiping it down even though it appeared immaculate.
I walked up to a large vase of flowers on the mantle. They were beautiful, black and purple dahlias. Studying the portrait hanging on the wall just above them, it took me a moment to realize I was staring at a painting of myself. It was so vivid it could have passed as a photograph. And Julian had been telling the truth. My hair had once been an ombre color, and though this was obviously done some time ago I hadn’t aged into someone unrecognizable.
It was in this precise moment that everything struck me. This painting with fresh flowers in front of it. The ring Julian still wore. The emptiness of the chateau. He’d never moved on. It was painfully obvious, which made it highly unlikely that he fathered a child with someone else.
I placed my hand on the stone surface as if it could give me strength. Sadness spiraled through me, transuding into every cell. Guilt came with it, slicing into my heart.
What had I done? Why? That one question resounded in my mind like an echo. My eyes prickled at the corner; wetness spilled down my cheeks. To of had a family and so recklessly have thrown it away?
“Why?”
“You had your reasons,” Bab’s replied softly. “I could never agree with what you did, but I understand why you did it.”
“And what were those reasons? What did I do?” I couldn’t imagine what would make me do something so drastic, so permanent. If I would have been successful, I wouldn’t have been standing there right then.
She returned her spray bottle to the cleaning organizer and removed a pack of tissues from her pocket. “You clean your face and take a deep breath. This is the hardest part, but that’s all it is. A part in a much larger story.”
Approaching me calmly, she pressed the Kleenex into my hand and gently squeezed my arm. “I’ll give you a few minutes.”
I was left alone for ten minutes at most, but it wasn’t Babs who returned. I knew it was him before he uttered a word. My body and small parts of my sub-conscious both remembered who he was. It was my memories of us that had yet to resurface. I had dreamed of him just that morning, though. That had to count as something.
“You’ve always looked so pretty when you cry.”
That strangely sounded like a compliment. But I was still taken aback and embarrassed he was seeing me like this, so I turned away. Just as he did yesterday, he came right up to me with zero regard for my personal space and snatched the Kleenex from my hand, pulling out two.
“You’re going to be just fine,” he said quietly, wiping each side of my face.
“You don’t know that.”
“I do, because I know you, Dollface.”
“Dollface?”
He balled up the tissue and stuffed it in the pocket of his slacks. After a slight step back, his eyes roamed over my body with an intrusive perusal before slowly coming back to my face. “Beautiful. I knew that dress would look good on you.”
His words ebbed a fraction of my sadness, even if they weren’t true. I knew my scars were blotchy and agitated from the tears. And the last time he’d seen me I looked like the woman in the portrait hanging on the wall. While I still had her face, there was no denying what happened to every one of us as years went by. We aged, and that wasn’t a bad thing, but a simple fact of life.
He tilted his head slightly. “You don’t believe me?”
“Aren’t you supposed to say that? I’m your wife.” If he was surprised that I knew who we were to one another he didn’t show it.
His lips twitched like he was fighting a smile. “You think I’d lie because you’re mine?” The sentence was spoken softly, but the possessiveness in his tone was equally as terrifying as it was thrilling. Endearing even.
“Morgana there’s one thing you’ll quickly begin to remember and if you don’t, I’m going to tell you now. I don’t coddle, pussyfoot, or bullshit. If I thought you were ugly, sweetheart. I would fucking tell you. Now, shall we?” He offered me his arm.
“Shouldn’t we talk.”
“We’ve got years to talk.”
“But‑‑.”
“You want answers and history lessons and reasons to go with all the whys.”
“Yes, I do,” I cut him off like he had just done me.
“I want the same things you do, but you know what I decided I wanted more after I woke up this morning? To spend time with my wife. As much as I can because I’ve already lost so much of it.”
His words strummed at the pain I felt in my chest. “I thought you were mad?”
“I am.” The conviction in his voice couldn’t be doubted. “You don’t understand what it was like to lose you. I’ve prayed to a god I don’t believe in to bring you back to me. You’re here now beautiful as you’ve always been and alive. I don’t tend to show my emotions so it may not seem like it, but while I’m madder than I’ve been in years, I’m just as happy too.”
“Julian, I’m…” I shook my head unable to find the words I wanted to say. How did I express I wasn’t sure who the woman was he fell in love with? I didn’t want to hurt him. That was the last thing I wanted to do.
“You can fall for me all over again,” he stated, as if he’d just read my mind. Like it was the simplest thing in the world.
Strangely enough, I had a feeling it would be. But then maybe that wasn’t strange at all. I already loved the color of his eyes and the way he smelled. I wanted him close even now like in the way
a child wanted their favorite teddy bear. For comfort and a sense of security, to not feel as alone. If he wanted to spend the day together, I could do that. I wanted to do that.
Time was all we really had to go off. Everything kept coming down to that four-letter word. I smiled for what felt like the first time in ages. “And what will you be doing while I’m falling for you?”
“Well that’s simple,” he replied casually, “I never fell out of love with you, Dollface.”
Suddenly I was tongue-tied. I hadn’t expected that, but I should have. Julian was refreshingly honest.
“Compromise with me. Stay by my side and you’ll know everything you should have always known, eventually. Rome wasn’t built in a day.”
“No, but it burned in one.”
He grinned, showing off a row of perfect teeth and those deep-set dimples I was already a huge fan of. “Fuck it, that doesn’t matter anyways. We’re not in Rome.”
He grabbed my arm and forced me to wrap it around his, leading me from the room. I liked how he took control of every situation. I leaned into the solidity of his frame, breathing in the comforting scent of his cologne.
“You’ve always been this crass.” A statement I knew down to my weary soul was true.
“Some say I’ve gotten worse with old age. Ironically after seeing you again, I’ve never felt younger.”
We went up the stairs and to the left, then we took another left and approached a pair of black double-doors. I’d seen them before I came downstairs earlier.
Julian stopped by a box on the wall. The one I’d thought was a new age thermostat from afar. He keyed in a four-digit code, not blocking me from seeing what it was.
“Why do you have a set of doors this secure in your own house?”
“Why do we have a set of doors this secure in our house?” He repeated back, correcting my terminology. “For our son when he was little. Now, so nosey guests don’t wander to where they aren’t welcome.”
Our son. He confirmed what I’d only just accepted so flippantly. We entered another hall. This one long and lined with black doors, all with a small red light above them.
“Red,” I mumbled to myself.
“You remember red?” He guessed correctly. It was almost unnerving how easily he could do that.
“Yeah. What is this?”
“A lot of things.” He untangled our arms, gently, and turned so he was standing in front of me. “From this point forward you’re going to see things you won’t like. I will do things you can’t fathom, and I may slip and say something that hurts you, but I promise I will always do my very best to cherish you.”
My feet took a step back before my brain acknowledged the movement. This man. He was the very epitome of intensity. I didn’t understand half of what he’d just said, but I knew there was no denying that he’d meant every single word. I took a better look around us, eyes sweeping up and down both sides of the hall.
“So, what is this?”
“This is the truth. I thought we’d start off with that this time around.” He took hold of my hand and led me a little further down.
Based off last night’s dinner conversation I could only begin to imagine what it was he about to show me. We stopped at a door on the right and he pushed it open. The smell of feces and bleach spilled out, clogging my nostrils. Julian stepped in, pulling me along with him.
He flipped a light switch and rattling erupted around the room.
It took my eyes a moment to adjust to the lighting change, but what I saw made the eerie feeling beyond the gates make a lot more sense. There were people locked in what looked like dog pound kennels, all reacting to the sudden burst of light, jerking about in their cages.
Julian was staring at me, watching for my reaction.
I knew I should have immediately began freaking the hell out, but if anything, I was apprehensive. And very confused.
“What is this?”
“This wing is the Dahlia’s hidden treasure so to speak. More specifically, this is the holding room.”
So, it was like a prison. Just not a government regulated kind. A girl off to the right whimpered after she flipped her waste bucket. A puddle spread out around her and she was forced to sit in her own urine. I walked over, curious.
“What did these people do to end up here?”
“Lots of things. One of the others would know better than me. I don’t care either way. No one winds up in this room by accident.”
“The others as in?”
“My brothers. The butchers. The‑‑.”
“Butchers?” I raised a brow.
“That’s what we call certain employees.”
I took a better look around. Everyone looked terrified, their fear so potent I could practically feel it in the air.
“And you just hold them in here then? Are all the other rooms like this one?” From my peripheral I caught sight of a smirk.
“They stay here until its time for them to be whatever is needed for an evening of endless entertainment.”
None of this made much sense to me. Something wiggled in the back of my mind. I rubbed my neck trying to piece things together as best I could.
“Why don’t you just tell me what all of this means?”
“The Dahlia is a place where people come to indulge their sickest, most depraved desires. Nothing is off limits at our Chateau.”
“I think I get it. You’re a supplier, these people are your product.” I gestured around the room.
“That’s an excellent analogy.
Everything he was saying began to click. In fact, it was one of the clearest things I’d seen in ages. He and his family kept human beings locked inside dog kennels. ‘Product’. And as a supplier when goods ran low, they would naturally acquire more. But before that could happen nearly every person in this room would be dead.
It was a chilling revelation, one that sent a shudder dancing down my spine. At the same time, I wasn’t surprised. I waited for the jolt of shock to hit my system, but it never came.
I looked at each one of the eight ghastly faces peering at us through padlocked gates of wire mesh, and then I turned to him. This man, my husband, was terrible. But she already knew that. She being the part of me that had recognized this place the moment we pulled up to its gates.
“What are you thinking?” he asked, bringing a hand up to cup the side of my face.
“I…” I didn’t know how to put it into words without sounding insane. Hell, perhaps I already was. I’d always known I was different, but this really took the cake. I had traces of past feelings beginning to rise inside me without any of the memories to match. It was like being two people inside one body. The old Morgana, and this one.
I’m not sure how I reacted to this revelation of his before, but the person I was now? I simply accepted it.
I knew that had a lot to do with my already knowing about it, sub-consciously. I just wasn’t sure how to voice that aloud. I swallowed, expelling a small breath through slightly parted lips.
He’d said we would start with the truth.
I’m sure there was a meaning behind that somewhere, but I agreed with his philosophy.
“I’m thinking it would be hard for me to tell you what it is I’m thinking, but I’m not afraid of this. Or you. I actually feel like I know you better now…as weird as that probably seems to you.”
He peered down at me, his eyes piercing. I felt as if he saw it, all the things I hadn’t figured out how to say.
“I understand far more than you’re probably assuming I do,” he murmured, pressing his lips to my forehead.
They were soft and cool, and I could have sunk into him as if he were a pool.
Before I had the chance, he dropped his hand and reclaimed mine. “Come on,” he coaxed, leading me back to the hall. He flipped the light off on our way out.
“Please!” Someone began to scream from inside the room. Their plea was cut short by the closing of the door.
“It’s soundproof
?”
“Of course. Could you imagine the ruckus if all that screaming was audible? It would be like a symphony of unsynchronized terror and agony.”
I took a deep breath then and dared to ask, “So what is it that you’re going to show me that will have me running for the hills?”
He blinked, quickly masking his surprise. A small smile played at the corners of his mouth. Without another word he took me right back the way we’d come and out into the hall.
“Don’t leave me in hanging in suspense for too long,” I joked, immediately biting my tongue.
I couldn’t believe I’d just done that. When was the last time I had? I focused on the floor as we walked.
We stopped at a door, the one right beside the room I’d been placed in at the end of the hall.
“I moved your bag to here. This was our room. You should go in and get settled. If you go out to explore, I’ll send for you when I’m ready.”
“When you’re ready for what?”
“You wanted to know what I was going to show you that would cause you to run for the hills. I’m going to do exactly that. Give you a show.”
I didn’t follow. I might have gotten it sooner if I weren’t so fixated on his face. We were only a few inches apart.
My head was tilted back so I could look up at him, his eyes locked with mine. I swore I felt as my battered heart fluttered to my throat. God, this man was beautiful. And he was mine. He was bad, too. So, so bad.
I knew I hadn’t even begun to breach the surface of it. But I’d married him.
I just stood in a room of soon to be victims and got lost in his eyes just like I was doing now. What did that say about me?
This was all so surreal, like at any minute I would wake up and this would be nothing but a dream. I’d go back to being alone and knowing nothing about myself because none of this would have mattered.
“Is this real?” I whispered.
“It’s as real as you and I.” He cupped my face with both his hands. “As real as this.”
I knew it was coming and I did nothing to stop it. Our lips met and it was as if my entire being sighed.His tongue traced along the seam barring its entrance, and I granted him access. He was gentle with me, but I longed for more. Another shift, and the desires of the woman who’d begged him in my dream went crashing through me.
Malevolence (Dahlia Saga Book 4) Page 5
