by Grant Allen
XII
THE ADVENTURE OF THE UNPROFESSIONAL DETECTIVE
'Is Lady Georgina at home?' The discreet man-servant in sober blackclothes eyed me suspiciously. 'No, miss,' he answered. 'That is tosay--no, ma'am. Her ladyship is still at Mr. Marmaduke Ashurst's--thelate Mr. Marmaduke Ashurst, I mean--in Park Lane North. You know thenumber, ma'am?'
'Yes, I know it,' I replied, with a gasp; for this was indeed a triumph.My one fear had been lest Lord Southminster should already have takenpossession--why, you will see hereafter; and it relieved me to learnthat Lady Georgina was still at hand to guard my husband's interests.She had been living at the house, practically, since her brother'sdeath. I drove round with all speed, and flung myself into my dear oldlady's arms.
'Kiss me,' I cried, flushed. 'I am your niece!' But she knew it already,for our movements had been fully reported by this time (with picturesqueadditions) in the morning papers. Imagination, ill-developed in theEnglish race, seems to concentrate itself in the lower order ofjournalists.
She kissed me on both cheeks with unwonted tenderness. 'Lois,' shecried, with tears in her eyes, 'you're a brick!' It was not exactlypoetical at such a moment, but from her it meant more than much gushingphraseology.
'And you're here in possession!' I murmured.
I'VE HELD THE FORT BY MAIN FORCE.]
The Cantankerous Old Lady nodded. She was in her element, I must admit.She dearly loved a row--above all, a family row; but to be in the thickof a family row, and to feel herself in the right, with the law againsther--that was joy such as Lady Georgina had seldom before experienced.'Yes, dear,' she burst out volubly, 'I'm in possession, thank Heaven.And what's more, they won't oust me without a legal process. I've beenhere, off and on, you know, ever since poor dear Marmy died, lookingafter things for Harold; and I shall look after them still, till BertieSouthminster succeeds in ejecting me, which won't be easy. Oh, I've heldthe fort by main force, I can tell you; held it like a Trojan. Bertie'sin a precious great hurry to move in, I can see; but I won't allow him.He's been down here this morning, fatuously blustering, and trying tocarry the post by storm, with a couple of policemen.'
'Policemen!' I cried. 'To turn you out?'
'Yes, my dear, policemen: but (the Lord be praised) I was too much forhim. There are legal formalities to fulfil yet; and I won't budge aninch, Lois, not one inch, my dear, till he's fulfilled every one ofthem. Mark my words, child, that boy's up to some devilry.'
'He is,' I answered.
'Yes, he wouldn't be in such a rampaging hurry to get in--being as lazyas he's empty-headed--takes after Gwendoline in that--if he hadn't someexcellent reason for wishing to take possession: and depend upon it, thereason is that he wants to get hold of something or other that'sHarold's. But he sha'n't if I can help it; and, thank my stars, I'm adour woman to reckon with. If he comes, he comes over my old bones,child. I've been overhauling everything of Marmy's, I can tell you, tocheckmate the boy if I can; but I've found nothing yet, and till I'vesatisfied myself on that point, I'll hold the fort still, if I have tobarricade that pasty-faced scoundrel of a nephew of mine out by pilingthe furniture against the front door-- I will, as sure as my name'sGeorgina Fawley!'
'I know you will, dear,' I assented, kissing her, 'and so I shallventure to leave you, while I go out to institute another littleenquiry.'
'What enquiry?'
I shook my head. 'It's only a surmise,' I said, hesitating. 'I'll tellyou about it later. I've had time to think while I've been coming backin the train, and I've thought of many things. Mount guard till Ireturn, and mind you don't let Lord Southminster have access toanything.'
'I'll shoot him first, dear.' And I believe she meant it.
I drove on in the same cab to Harold's solicitor. There I laid my freshdoubts at once before him. He rubbed his bony hands. 'You've hit it!' hecried, charmed. 'My dear madam, you've hit it! I never did like thatwill. I never did like the signatures, the witnesses, the look of it.But what could I do? Mr. Tillington propounded it. Of course it wasn'tmy business to go dead against my own client.'
'Then you doubted Harold's honour, Mr. Hayes?' I cried, flushing.
NEVER! HE ANSWERED. NEVER!]
'Never!' he answered. 'Never! I felt sure there must be some mistakesomewhere, but not any trickery on--your husband's part. Now, _you_supply the right clue. We must look into this, immediately.'
He hurried round with me at once in the same cab to the court. Theincriminated will had been 'impounded,' as they call it; but, undercertain restrictions, and subject to the closest surveillance, I wasallowed to examine it with my husband's solicitor, before the eyes ofthe authorities. I looked at it long with the naked eye and also with asmall pocket lens. The paper, as I had noted before, was the same kindof foolscap as that which I had been in the habit of using at my officein Florence; and the typewriting--was it mine? The longer I looked atit, the more I doubted it.
After a careful examination I turned round to our solicitor. 'Mr.Hayes,' I said, firmly, having arrived at my conclusion, 'this is _not_the document I type-wrote at Florence.'
'How do you know?' he asked. 'A different machine? Some smallpeculiarity in the shape of the letters?'
'No, the rogue who typed this will was too cunning for that. He didn'tallow himself to be foiled by such a scholar's mate. It is written witha Spread Eagle, the same sort of machine precisely as my own. I know thetype perfectly. But----' I hesitated.
'But what?'
'Well, it is difficult to explain. There is character in typewriting,just as there is in handwriting, only, of course, not quite so much ofit. Every operator is liable to his own peculiar tricks and blunders.If I had some of my own typewritten manuscript here to show you, I couldsoon make that evident.'
'I can easily believe it. Individuality runs through all we do, howeverseemingly mechanical. But are the points of a sort that you could makeclear in court to the satisfaction of a jury?'
'I think so. Look here, for example. Certain letters get habituallymixed up in typewriting; _c_ and _v_ stand next one another on thekeyboard of the machine, and the person who typed this draft sometimesstrikes a _c_ instead of a _v_, or _vice versa_. I never do that. Theletters I tend to confuse are _s_ and _w_, or else _e_ and _r_, whichalso come very near one another in the arbitrary arrangement. Besides,when I type-wrote the original of this will, I made no errors at all; Itook such very great pains about it.'
'And this person did make errors?'
'Yes; struck the wrong letter first, and then corrected it often bystriking another rather hard on top of it. See, this was a _v_ to beginwith, and he turned it into a _c_. Besides, the hand that wrote thiswill is heavier than mine: it comes down _thump_, _thump_, _thump_,while mine glides lightly. And the hyphens are used with a space betweenthem, and the character of the punctuation is not exactly as I make it.'
'Still,' Mr. Hayes objected, 'we have nothing but your word. I'm afraid,in such a case, we could never induce a jury to accept your unsupportedevidence.'
'I don't want them to accept it,' I answered. 'I am looking this up formy own satisfaction. I want to know, first, who wrote this will. And ofone thing I am quite clear: it is _not_ the document I drew up for Mr.Ashurst. Just look at that _x_. The _x_ alone is conclusive. Mytypewriter had the upper right-hand stroke of the small _x_ badlyformed, or broken, while this one is perfect. I remember it well,because I used always to improve all my lower-case _x_'s with a pen whenI re-read and corrected. I see their dodge clearly now. It is a mostdiabolical conspiracy. Instead of forging a will in Lord Southminster'sfavour, they have substituted a forgery for the real will, and thenmanaged to make my poor Harold prove it.'
'In that case, no doubt, they have destroyed the real one, theoriginal,' Mr. Hayes put in.
'I don't think so,' I answered, after a moment's deliberation. 'Fromwhat I know of Mr. Ashurst, I don't believe it is likely he would haveleft his will about carelessly anywhere. He was a secretive man, fond ofmysteries and mystifications. He woul
d be sure to conceal it. Besides,Lady Georgina and Harold have been taking care of everything in thehouse ever since he died.'
'But,' Mr. Hayes objected, 'the forger of this document, supposing it tobe forged, must have had access to the original, since you say the termsof the two are identical; only the signatures are forgeries. And if hesaw and copied it, why might he not also have destroyed it?'
A light flashed across me all at once. 'The forger _did_ see theoriginal,' I cried, 'but not the fair copy. I have it all now! I detecttheir trick! It comes back to me vividly! When I had finished typing thecopy at Florence from my first rough draft, which I had taken down onthe machine before Mr. Ashurst's eyes, I remember now that I threw theoriginal into the waste-paper basket. It must have been there thatevening when Higginson called and asked for the will to take it back toMr. Ashurst. He called for it, no doubt, hoping to open the packetbefore he delivered it and make a copy of the document for this verypurpose. But I refused to let him have it. Before he saw me, however,he had been left by himself for ten minutes in the office; for Iremember coming out to him and finding him there alone: and during thatten minutes, being what he is, you may be sure he fished out the roughdraft and appropriated it!'
WE SHALL HAVE HIM IN OUR POWER.]
'That is more than likely,' my solicitor nodded. 'You are tracking himto his lair. We shall have him in our power.'
I grew more and more excited as the whole cunning plot unravelled itselfmentally step by step before me. 'He must then have gone to LordSouthminster,' I went on, 'and told him of the legacy he expected fromMr. Ashurst. It was five hundred pounds--a mere trifle to Higginson, whoplays for thousands. So he must have offered to arrange matters for LordSouthminster if Southminster would consent to make good that sum and agreat deal more to him. That odious little cad told me himself on the_Jumna_ they were engaged in pulling off "a big _coup_" between them. Hethought then I would marry him, and that he would so secure myconnivance in his plans; but who would marry such a piece of moist clay?Besides, I could never have taken anyone but Harold.' Then another cluecame home to me. 'Mr. Hayes,' I cried, jumping at it, 'Higginson, whoforged this will, never saw the real document itself at all; he saw onlythe draft: for Mr. Ashurst altered one word _viva voce_ in the originalat the last moment, and I made a pencil note of it on my cuff at thetime: and see, it isn't here, though I inserted it in the final cleancopy of the will--the word 'especially.' It grows upon me more and moreeach minute that the real instrument is hidden somewhere in Mr.Ashurst's house--Harold's house--our house; and that _because_ it isthere Lord Southminster is so indecently anxious to oust his aunt andtake instant possession.'
'In that case,' Mr. Hayes remarked, 'we had better go back to LadyGeorgina without one minute's delay, and, while she still holds thehouse, institute a thorough search for it.'
No sooner said than done. We jumped again into our cab and started. Aswe drove back, Mr. Hayes asked me where I thought we were most likely tofind it.
'In a secret drawer in Mr. Ashurst's desk,' I answered, by a flash ofinstinct, without a second's hesitation.
'How do you know there's a secret drawer?'
'I don't know it. I infer it from my general knowledge of Mr. Ashurst'scharacter. He loved secret drawers, ciphers, cryptograms,mystery-mongering.'
'But it was in that desk that your husband found the forged document,'the lawyer objected.
Once more I had a flash of inspiration or intuition. 'Because White, Mr.Ashurst's valet, had it in readiness in his possession,' I answered,'and hid it there, in the most obvious and unconcealed place he couldfind, as soon as the breath was out of his master's body. I remember nowLord Southminster gave himself away to some extent in that matter. Thehateful little creature isn't really clever enough, for all hiscunning,--and with Higginson to back him,--to mix himself up in suchtricks as forgery. He told me at Aden he had had a telegram from"Marmy's valet," to report progress; and he received another, the nightMr. Ashurst died, at Moozuffernuggar. Depend upon it, White was more orless in this plot; Higginson left him the forged will when they startedfor India; and, as soon as Mr. Ashurst died, White hid it where Haroldwas bound to find it.'
'If so,' Mr. Hayes answered, 'that's well; we have something to go upon.The more of them, the better. There is safety in numbers--for the honestfolk. I never knew three rogues hold long together, especially whenthreatened with a criminal prosecution. Their confederacy breaks downbefore the chance of punishment. Each tries to screen himself bybetraying the others.'
'Higginson was the soul of this plot,' I went on. 'Of that you may besure. He's a wily old fox, but we'll run him to earth yet. The more Ithink of it, the more I feel sure, from what I know of Mr. Ashurst'scharacter, he would never have put that will in so exposed a place asthe one where Harold says he found it.'
We drew up at the door of the disputed house just in time for the siege.Mr. Hayes and I walked in. We found Lady Georgina face to face with LordSouthminster. The opposing forces were still at the stage ofpreliminaries of warfare.
'Look heah,' the pea-green young man was observing, in his drawlingvoice, as we entered; 'it's no use your talking, deah Georgey. Thishouse is mine, and I won't have you meddling with it.'
'This house is not yours, you odious little scamp,' his aunt retorted,raising her shrill voice some notes higher than usual; 'and while I canhold a stick you shall not come inside it.'
'Very well, then; you drive me to hostilities, don't yah know. I'm sorryto show disrespect to your gray hairs--if any--but I shall be obliged tocall in the police to eject yah.'
'Call them in if you like,' I answered, interposing between them. 'Goout and get them! Mr. Hayes, while he's gone, send for a carpenter tobreak open the back of Mr. Ashurst's escritoire.'
'A carpentah?' he cried, turning several degrees whiter than his pastywont. 'What for? A carpentah?'
I spoke distinctly. 'Because we have reason to believe Mr. Ashurst'sreal will is concealed in this house in a secret drawer, and because thekeys were in the possession of White, whom we believe to be youraccomplice in this shallow conspiracy.'
He gasped and looked alarmed. 'No, you don't,' he cried, steppingbriskly forward. 'You don't, I tell yah! Break open Marmy's desk! Why,hang it all, it's my property.'
'We shall see about that after we've broken it open,' I answered grimly.'Here, this screw-driver will do. The back's not strong. Now, your help,Mr. Hayes--one, two, three; we can prise it apart between us.'
Lord Southminster rushed up and tried to prevent us. But Lady Georgina,seizing both wrists, held him tight as in a vice with her dear skinnyold hands. He writhed and struggled all in vain: he could not escapeher. 'I've often spanked you, Bertie,' she cried, 'and if you attempt tointerfere, I'll spank you again; that's the long and the short of it!'
He broke from her and rushed out, to call the police, I believe, andprevent our desecration of pooah Marmy's property.
VICTORY.]
Inside the first shell were several locked drawers, and two or threeopen ones, out of one of which Harold had fished the false will.Instinct taught me somehow that the central drawer on the left-hand sidewas the compartment behind which lay the secret receptacle. I prised itapart and peered about inside it. Presently I saw a slip-panel, which Itouched with one finger. The pigeon-hole flew open and disclosed anarrow slit I clutched at something--the will! Ho, victory! the will! Iraised it aloft with a wild shout. Not a doubt of it! The real, thegenuine document!
We turned it over and read it. It was my own fair copy, written atFlorence, and bearing all the small marks of authenticity about it whichI had pointed out to Mr. Hayes as wanting to the forged and impoundeddocument. Fortunately, Lady Georgina and four of the servants had stoodby throughout this scene, and had watched our demeanour, as well as LordSouthminster's.
We turned next to the signatures. The principal one was clearly Mr.Ashurst's-- I knew it at once--his legible fat hand, 'Marmaduke CourtneyAshurst.' And then the witnesses? They fairly took our breath away.
'Why, Higginson's sister isn't one of them at all,' Mr. Hayes cried,astonished.
A flush of remorse came over me. I saw it all now. I had misjudged thatpoor woman! She had the misfortune to be a rogue's sister, but, asHarold had said, was herself a most respectable and blameless person.Higginson must have forged her name to the document; that was all; andshe had naturally sworn that she never signed it. He knew her honesty.It was a master-stroke of rascality.
'The other one isn't here, either,' I exclaimed, growing more puzzled.'The waiter at the hotel! Why, that's another forgery! Higginson musthave waited till the man was safely dead, and then used him similarly.It was all very clever. Now, who are these people who really witnessedit?'
'The first one,' Mr. Hayes said, examining the handwriting, 'is SirRoger Bland, the Dorsetshire baronet: he's dead, poor fellow; but hewas at Florence at the time, and I can answer for his signature. He wasa client of mine, and died at Mentone. The second is Captain Richards,of the Mounted Police: he's living still, but he's away in SouthAfrica.'
'Then they risked his turning up?'
'If they knew who the real witnesses were at all--which is doubtful. Yousee, as you say, they may have seen the rough draft only.'
'Higginson would know,' I answered. 'He was with Mr. Ashurst at Florenceat the time, and he would take good care to keep a watch upon hismovements. In my belief, it was he who suggested this whole plot to LordSouthminster.'
'Of course it was,' Lady Georgina put in. 'That's absolutely certain.Bertie's a rogue as well as a fool: but he's too great a fool to inventa clever roguery, and too great a knave not to join in it foolishly whenanybody else takes the pains to invent it.'
'And it _was_ a clever roguery,' Mr. Hayes interposed. 'An ordinaryrascal would have forged a later will in Lord Southminster's favour andrun the risk of detection; Higginson had the acuteness to forge a willexactly like the real one, and to let your husband bear the burden ofthe forgery. It was as sagacious as it was ruthless.'
'The next point,' I said, 'will be for us to prove it.'
At that moment the bell rang, and one of the house-servants--all puzzledby this conflict of interests--came in with a telegram, which he handedme on a salver. I broke it open, without glancing at the envelope. Itscontents baffled me: 'My address is Hotel Bristol, Paris; name as usual.Send me a thousand pounds on account at once. I can't afford to wait. Noshillyshallying.'
The message was unsigned. For a moment, I couldn't imagine who sent it,or what it was driving at.
Then I took up the envelope. 'Viscount Southminster, 24 Park Lane North,London.'
My heart gave a jump. I saw in a second that chance, or Providence, haddelivered the conspirators into my hands that day. The telegram was fromHigginson! I had opened it by accident.
It was obvious what had happened. Lord Southminster must have written tohim on the result of the trial, and told him he meant to take possessionof his uncle's house immediately. Higginson had acted on that hint, andaddressed his telegram where he thought it likely Lord Southminsterwould receive it earliest. I had opened it in error, and that, too, wasfortunate, for even in dealing with such a pack of scoundrels, it wouldnever have occurred to me to violate somebody else's correspondence hadI not thought it was addressed to me. But having arrived at the truththus unintentionally, I had, of course, no scruples about making fulluse of my information.
I showed the despatch at once to Lady Georgina and Mr. Hayes. Theyrecognised its importance. 'What next?' I inquired. 'Time presses. Athalf-past three Harold comes up for examination at Bow Street.'
Mr. Hayes was ready with an apt expedient. 'Ring the bell for Mr.Ashurst's valet,' he said, quietly. 'The moment has now arrived when wecan begin to set these conspirators by the ears. As soon as they learnthat we know all, they will be eager to inform upon one another.'
I rang the bell. 'Send up White,' I said. 'We wish to speak to him.'
The valet stole up, self-accused, a timid, servile creature, rubbing hishands nervously, and suspecting mischief. He was a rat in trouble. Hehad thin brown hair, neatly brushed and plastered down, so as to make itlook still thinner, and his face was the average narrow cunning face ofthe dishonest man-servant. It had an ounce of wile in it to a pound ortwo of servility. He seemed just the sort of rogue meanly to join in anunderhand conspiracy, and then meanly to back out of it. You could readat a glance that his principle in life was to save his own bacon.
YOU WISHED TO SEE ME, SIR?]
He advanced, fumbling his hands all the time, and smiling and fawning.'You wished to see me, sir?' he murmured, in a deprecatory voice,looking sideways at Lady Georgina and me, but addressing the lawyer.
'Yes, White, I wished to see you. I have a question to ask you. _Who_put the forged will in Mr. Ashurst's desk? Was it you, or some otherperson?'
The question terrified him. He changed colour and gasped. But he rubbedhis hands harder than ever and affected a sickly smile. 'Oh, sir, howshould _I_ know, sir? _I_ had nothing to do with it. I suppose--it wasMr. Tillington.'
Our lawyer pounced upon him like a hawk on a titmouse. 'Don'tprevaricate with me, sir,' he said, sternly. 'If you do, it may be worsefor you. This case has assumed quite another aspect. It is you and yourassociates who will be placed in the dock, not Mr. Tillington. You hadbetter speak the truth; it is your one chance, I warn you. Lie to me,and instead of calling you as a witness for our case, I shall includeyou in the indictment.'
White looked down uneasily at his shoes, and cowered. 'Oh, sir, I don'tunderstand you.'
'Yes you do. You understand me, and you know I mean it. Wriggling isuseless; we intend to prosecute. We have unravelled this vile plot. Weknow the whole truth. Higginson and Lord Southminster forged a willbetween them----'
'Oh, sir, _not_ Lord Southminster! His lordship, I'm sure----'
Mr. Hayes's keen eye had noted the subtle shade of distinction andadmission. But he said nothing openly. 'Well, then, Higginson forged,and Lord Southminster accepted, a false will, which purported to be Mr.Marmaduke Ashurst's. Now, follow me clearly. That will could not havebeen put into the escritoire during Mr. Ashurst's life, for there wouldhave been risk of his discovering it. It must, therefore, have been putthere afterward. The moment he was dead, you, or somebody else with yourconsent and connivance, slipped it into the escritoire; and youafterwards showed Mr. Tillington the place where you had set it or seenit set, leading him to believe it was Mr. Ashurst's will, and soinvolved him in all this trouble. Note that that was a felonious act. Weaccuse you of felony. Do you mean to confess, and give evidence on ourbehalf, or will you force me to send for a policeman to arrest you?'
The cur hesitated still. 'Oh, sir,' drawing back, and fumbling his handson his breast, 'you don't mean it.'
Mr. Hayes was prompt. 'Hesslegrave, go for a policeman.'
That curt sentence brought the rogue on his marrow-bones at once. Heclasped his hands and debated inwardly. 'If I tell you all I know,' hesaid, at last, looking about him with an air of abject terror, as if hethought Lord Southminster or Higginson would hear him, 'will you promisenot to prosecute me?' His tone became insinuating. 'For a hundredpounds, I could find the real will for you. You'd better close with me.To-day is the last chance. As soon as his lordship comes in, he'll huntit up and destroy it.'
I flourished it before him, and pointed with one hand to the brokendesk, which he had not yet observed in his craven agitation.
'We do not need your aid,' I answered. 'We have found the will,ourselves. Thanks to Lady Georgina, it is safe till this minute.'
'And to me,' he put in, cringing, and trying after his kind, to curryfavour with the winners at the last moment. 'It's all _my_ doing, mylady! I wouldn't destroy it. His lordship offered me a hundred poundsmore to break open the back of the desk at night, while your ladyshipwas asleep, and burn the thing quietly. But I told him he might do hisown dirty work if he wanted it done. It wasn't good enough while yourladyship was here in possession. Besides, I wanted the right willprese
rved, for I thought things might turn up so; and I wouldn't standby and see a gentleman like Mr. Tillington, as has always behaved wellto me, deprived of his inheritance.'
'Which is why you conspired with Lord Southminster to rob him of it, andto send him to prison for Higginson's crime,' I interposed calmly.
'Then you confess you put the forged will there?' Mr. Hayes said,getting to business.
White looked about him helplessly. He missed his headpiece, theinstigator of the plot. 'Well, it was like this, my lady,' he began,turning to Lady Georgina, and wriggling to gain time. 'You see, hislordship and Mr. Higginson----' he twirled his thumbs and tried toinvent something plausible.
Lady Georgina swooped. 'No rigmarole!' she said, sharply. 'Do youconfess you put it there or do you not--reptile?' Her vehemence startledhim.
'Yes, I confess I put it there,' he said at last, blinking. 'As soon asthe breath was out of Mr. Ashurst's body I put it there.' He began towhimper. 'I'm a poor man with a wife and family, sir,' he went on,'though in Mr. Ashurst's time I always kep' that quiet; and his lordshipoffered to pay me well for the job; and when you're paid well for a jobyourself, sir----'
Mr. Hayes waved him off with one imperious hand. 'Sit down in the cornerthere, man, and don't move or utter another word,' he said, sternly,'until I order you. You will be in time still for me to produce at BowStreet.'
Just at that moment, Lord Southminster swaggered back, accompanied by acouple of unwilling policemen. 'Oh, I say,' he cried, bursting in andstaring around him, jubilant. 'Look heah, Georgey, _are_ you goingquietly, or must I ask these coppahs to evict you?' He was wreathed insmiles now, and had evidently been fortifying himself with brandies andsoda.
Lady Georgina rose in her wrath. 'Yes, I'll go if you wish it, Bertie,'she answered, with calm irony. 'I'll leave the house as soon as youlike--for the present--till we come back again with Harold and _his_policemen to evict you. This house is Harold's. Your game is played,boy.' She spoke slowly. 'We have found the other will--we havediscovered Higginson's present address in Paris--and we know from Whitehow he and you arranged this little conspiracy.'
WELL, THIS IS A FAIR KNOCK-OUT, HE EJACULATED.]
She rapped out each clause in this last accusing sentence withdeliberate effect, like so many pistol-shots. Each bullet hit home. Thepea-green young man, drawing back and staring, stroked his shadowymoustache with feeble fingers in undisguised astonishment. Then hedropped into a chair and fixed his gaze blankly on Lady Georgina. 'Well,this is a fair knock-out,' he ejaculated, fatuously disconcerted. 'Iwish Higginson was heah. I really don't quite know what to do withouthim. That fellah had squared it all up so neatly, don't yah know, that Ithought there couldn't be any sort of hitch in the proceedings.'
'You reckoned without Lois,' Lady Georgina said, calmly.
'Ah, Miss Cayley--that's true. I mean, Mrs. Tillington. Yaas, yaas, Iknow, she's a doosid clevah person--for a woman,--now isn't she?'
It was impossible to take this flabby creature seriously, even as acriminal. Lady Georgina's lips relaxed. 'Doosid clever,' she admitted,looking at me almost tenderly.
'But not quite so clevah, don't yah know, as Higginson!'
'There you make your blooming little erraw,' Mr. Hayes burst in,adopting one of Lord Southminster's favourite witticisms--the sort ofwitticism that improves, like poetry, by frequent repetition.'Policemen, you may go into the next room and wait: this is a familyaffair; we have no immediate need of you.'
'Oh, certainly,' Lord Southminster echoed, much relieved. 'Very propahsentiment! Most undesirable that the constables should mix themselves upin a family mattah like this. Not the place for inferiahs!'
'Then why introduce them?' Lady Georgina burst out, turning on him.
He smiled his fatuous smile. 'That's just what I say,' he answered. 'Whythe jooce introduce them? But don't snap my head off!'
The policemen withdrew respectfully, glad to be relieved of thisunpleasant business, where they could gain no credit, and might possiblyinvolve themselves in a charge of assault. Lord Southminster rose with abenevolent grin, and looked about him pleasantly. The brandies and sodahad endowed him with irrepressible cheerfulness.
'Well?' Lady Georgina murmured.
'Well, I think I'll leave now, Georgey. You've trumped my ace, yah know.Nasty trick of White to go and round on a fellah. I don't like the turnthis business is taking. Seems to me, the only way I have left to getout of it is--to turn Queen's evidence.'
Lady Georgina planted herself firmly against the door. 'Bertie,' shecried, 'no, you don't--not till we've got what we want out of you!'
He gazed at her blandly. His face broke once more into an imbecilesmile. 'You were always a rough 'un, Georgey. Your hand did sting! Well,what do you want now? We've each played our cards, and you needn't cutup rusty over it--especially when you're winning! Hang it all, I wish Ihad Higginson heah to tackle you!'
'If you go to see the Treasury people, or the Solicitor-General, or thePublic Prosecutor, or whoever else it may be,' Lady Georgina said,stoutly, 'Mr. Hayes must go with you. We've trumped your ace, as yousay, and we mean to take advantage of it. And then you must trundleyourself down to Bow Street afterwards, confess the whole truth, and setHarold at liberty.'
'Oh, I say now, Georgey! The whole truth! the whole blooming truth!That's really what I call humiliating a fellah!'
'If you don't, we arrest you this minute--fourteen years' imprisonment!'
'Fourteen yeahs?' He wiped his forehead. 'Oh, I say. How doosiduncomfortable. I was nevah much good at doing anything by the sweat ofmy brow. I ought to have lived in the Garden of Eden. Georgey, you'rehard on a chap when he's down on his luck. It would be confounded cruelto send me to fourteen yeahs at Portland.'
'You would have sent my husband to it,' I broke in, angrily, confrontinghim.
'What? You too, Miss Cayley?-- I mean Mrs. Tillington. Don't look at melike that. Tigahs aren't in it.'
His jauntiness disarmed us. However wicked he might be, one felt itwould be ridiculous to imprison this schoolboy. A sound flogging and amonth's deprivation of wine and cigarettes was the obvious punishmentdesigned for him by nature.
'You must go down to the police-court and confess this wholeconspiracy,' Lady Georgina went on after a pause, as sternly as she wasable. 'I prefer, if we can, to save the family--even you, Bertie. But Ican't any longer save the family honour-- I can only save Harold's. Youmust help me to do that; and then, you must give me your solemnpromise--in writing--to leave England for ever, and go to live in SouthAfrica.'
He stroked the invisible moustache more nervously than before. Thatpenalty came home to him. 'What, leave England for evah?Newmarket--Ascot--the club--the music-halls!'
'Or fourteen years' imprisonment!'
'Georgey, you spank as hard as evah!'
'Decide at once, or we arrest you!'
He glanced about him feebly. I could see he was longing for his lostconfederate. 'Well, I'll go,' he said at last, sobering down; 'and yoursolicitaw can trot round with me. I'll do all that you wish, though Icall it most unfriendly. Hang it all, fourteen yeahs would be so beastlyunpleasant!'
We drove forthwith to the proper authorities, who, on hearing the facts,at once arranged to accept Lord Southminster and White as Queen'sevidence, neither being the actual forger. We also telegraphed to Paristo have Higginson arrested, Lord Southminster giving us up his assumedname with the utmost cheerfulness, and without one moment's compunction.Mr. Hayes was quite right: each conspirator was only too ready to savehimself by betraying his fellows. Then we drove on to Bow Street (LordSouthminster consoling himself with a cigarette on the way), just intime for Harold's case, which was to be taken, by special arrangement,at 3.30.
A very few minutes sufficed to turn the tables completely on theconspirators. Harold was discharged, and a warrant was issued for thearrest of Higginson, the actual forger. He had drawn up the false willand signed it with Mr. Ashurst's name, after which he had presented itfor Lord Southminster's appr
oval. The pea-green young man told his talewith engaging frankness. 'Bertie's a simple Simon,' Lady Georginacommented to me; 'but he's also a rogue; and Higginson saw his way tomake excellent capital of him in both capacities--first use him as acatspaw, and then blackmail him.'
HAROLD, YOUR WIFE HAS BESTED ME.]
On the steps of the police-court, as we emerged triumphant, LordSouthminster met us--still radiant as ever. He seemed wholly unaware ofthe depths of his iniquity: a fresh dose of brandy had restored hiscomposure. 'Look heah,' he said, 'Harold, your wife has bested me! Jollygood thing for you that you managed to get hold of such a clevah woman!If you hadn't, deah boy, you'd have found yourself in Queeah Street!But, I say, Lois-- I call yah Lois because you're my cousin now, yahknow--you were backing the wrong man aftah all, as I told yah. For ifyou'd backed _me_, all this wouldn't have come out; you'd have got thetin and been a countess as well, aftah the governah's dead and gone,don't yah see. You'd have landed the double event. So you'd have pulledoff a bettah thing for yourself in the end, as I said, if you'd laidyour bottom dollah on me for winnah!'
Higginson is now doing fourteen years at Portland; Harold and I arehappy in the sweetest place in Gloucestershire; and Lord Southminster,blissfully unaware of the contempt with which the rest of the worldregards him, is shooting big game among his 'boys' in South Africa.Indeed, he bears so little malice that he sent us a present of a trophyof horns for our hall last winter.
THE END
THE WINCHESTER EDITION OF THE NOVELS OF JANE AUSTEN
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