by Sam Crescent
I stayed silent. In my mind, it wasn’t killing myself. “I sometimes just want to be free.” I looked at him. “My dad, he’s the worst kind of person. I don’t want to be under his rule for much longer, and I do think about what it would be like to take that knife and to end his stupid control. I grow tired of the fear. I want an out.”
“You can’t kill yourself.”
“River, don’t try to tell me what to do. It never goes down well.”
“For everyone else, but I’m not like other guys. I’m different.”
I watched him as his gaze stayed on the road. He hadn’t stopped once. We weren’t going as fast as we had been, but there was a speed to us.
“I know you think I’m not right, but I am. I’ve been taken. You heard the rumors, the stories. I was so close to death, hours even if I hadn’t gotten the medical attention when I did. You’ve seen the scars. You know what I don’t hide. I know what it’s like to want to end your own life, but you know what, that was just to numb the pain. To make me feel like I had control.”
He slammed his palm against the steering wheel. “I don’t accept it. I can’t. There’s no way I’m going to lie down with this. Those hours, those few days I spent in my enemy’s company taught me a lot. It taught me how hated I am but it also made me strong. I will never allow anyone to have any kind of control over me.”
“It must be nice to be the one who is in control. You forget, River. I’m just a girl. I don’t get to have a say in what I do. My dad holds the cards. I’ve just got to play his game.”
I didn’t want to talk anymore.
River took my hand and I didn’t look at him even as his lips brushed against my knuckles. “You have so much power, Emily.”
Silence filled the car. It wasn’t for long. “I know what the others have told you. I get that it scares you. Four of us.”
This time, I had no choice but to look at him. He still had his gaze on the road. Every now and then, he’d stop to look at me. “But I love you too. They may not clearly see that darkness within you, the call of the blade, but I do. Don’t end your life because of those assholes. Learn to fight. You’ve got more power than you realize. All you’ve got to do is harvest it.”
Chapter Fifteen
Gael
The day of the party was alive with activity. This wasn’t going to be a small affair. Nearly everyone who was anyone had been invited. This was going to be a huge deal, bigger than even I thought it would be.
To play the part, I’d ordered one of the most expensive designer tuxedos. Emily had already been sent a beautiful purple gown. I’d caught a glimpse of it, snooping in her room. I took great pleasure in getting through Bernard’s security. I’d always found odd ways to entertain myself.
“Ah, there you are,” my father said, coming into the room.
He was wearing a similar tux but in a gray color.
“I expect you to be on your best behavior.”
“When am I not?”
“I mean it, Gael. I don’t want a spectacle. You’ll be the perfect gentleman.”
“And yet you’ve trained me to be the perfect killer.”
He sighed. My father, Dean Parson, was so feared. He’d told me he had a reputation to uphold, which was why he was so hard on me. He wanted me to take over from him, but so people would admire me, not hate me. Personally, I just thought he liked to cause pain. He had a sick and twisted eye for it. He loved to create fear, jealousy. I thought it was why I was a little fucked and got off on other people’s misery. Not Emily’s, though. I guessed my fascination with her wasn’t completely innocent. She was the first person outside of my friends I wanted to care about.
She certainly was the first woman I saw more of than a damn hole to stick my cock into. I’d shared plenty with my friends. Women were a means to an end, and yes, I could only see us being with one girl. I didn’t see us all sharing a bed and being one big harem within her bed. No, I saw us all spending time with her. Emily sharing her time equally with all of us, or not even equally, just whoever was close.
I didn’t want her to just fall in love with me. I craved her emotional submission to each of us. She was the first woman to make me feel like that, and I couldn’t turn my back on that kind of feeling.
“I’ve trained you, Gael, to be whatever you’re needed to be. You turn the charm on and off when needed, and you know when to strike.”
For good measure, he hit me around the back of the head, smooth and swift. It wasn’t something I’d forgotten. He knew how to get to me. So many times I’d hit him back that the hits got harder. As I grit my teeth, he smiled. “See, that isn’t so bad.”
“One day, I’m going to be standing where you are,” I said. I didn’t know if it was a warning or a threat.
This made my dad smile even wider. “You think I didn’t say the same thing to my dad? I know that deep down that he loved me. He wanted what was best for me, and the only way to get what he wanted was to make me hard and strong. I admire that man. I love you, Gael. So damn much it scares me. I will not under any circumstance put you in the ground. Burying you is the last thing I ever want to do.”
“Even though I’m not Bethany’s?” I asked.
He tensed up but he didn’t strike. “There was a time I told the love of my life that I didn’t think I was capable of love. She laughed at me. She told me that I was an idiot. I was not only capable of love, but she expected me to love my children. To bring them up in a loving home.”
He was sad.
“I try to live with her in mind. That’s enough talking about the past.” He stepped away from me and I wondered if I was to push a little more, would he strike me? Would he make me bleed?
Tonight wasn’t the night. All I wanted was for Emily to be in my arms.
“Is he here?” I asked.
“Who?”
“The guy who has bought her?”
“Yes,” Dean said. He poured himself a small shot of whiskey.
“Are you going to tell me what you’ve decided?” I asked.
“You’re still only a son.”
“She’s the love of my life.” I wasn’t going to put her life on the line to save face, not with my father. I was a deadly killer who fucked up. “Don’t forget without her, you’d have been burying me.”
“Don’t think I’ve forgotten that, Gael. I know very much and each meeting I go into, I take that knowledge with me.”
“She’s ours,” I said.
“Gael, go and enjoy the party. You’re starting to give me a headache.”
“And here I thought we were having a real bonding moment.” I rolled my eyes but left the room. I knew when it was best to cut my losses and get the fuck out of there. Today was one of those times.
Clearly, talking about Bethany was tough on my dad.
The moment I stood out in the garden, I paused. All four houses had been opened up for the party. Even though we lived on four corners, there were long pathways that joined up each of the houses. Our space was massive, abundant. There were houses between ours, but they were separated by large brick walls, keeping them in their places.
Caleb said he’d be collecting Emily. I thought about my dad, then about my Emily. I wondered what it would be like to lose her, but also to have to see the baby she gave birth to. Did Dean hate Caleb? Did all of them hate him?
Would I hate any child Emily gave birth to?
I owed her my life.
“Hello.”
I turned to see Ashley making her way toward me. She had a sweet smile on her face. I didn’t know she’d been invited. She came to stand beside me. “Your home is really pretty.”
“What makes you think we’re friends?” I asked. A waiter passed us and I took a glass of champagne for myself, nothing for my new little friend.
“Has anyone ever told you how rude you are?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“Besides, you can pretend all you want, you like me.”
I snorted. “What make
s you think that?”
“Emily likes me. I’ve seen the way you look at her. You can try to believe it’s not, but we know the truth. You’re in love with her and you won’t do anything to upset her.” She shrugged. “Don’t worry. I’m used to people hating me. You won’t be the first person.”
“I don’t like you.”
“Fine by me.” She tapped her foot. “So, this is a big deal kind of party?”
“Have you ever been to a party?”
“Of course. I mean, I’ve been to the usual kind with a big, bouncy castle and lots of food. Kids running around. I don’t see kids.”
“Kids aren’t invited to these kinds of parties. They make way too much noise.” This girl was giving me a headache.
“You seen anyone else?”
“Nope. Me and my mom just arrived.”
This was a surprise to me.
“Excuse me.”
“Gael, please, don’t leave me alone.” She stepped to me. “I’m not coming on to you or anything. I’m not flirting. I just, I didn’t want to come. My mom made me.” She nibbled on her lip.
Sighing, I shook my head but held my arm out for her to grip on to it. “I’m not being nice.”
“No, of course not. You’re a complete and total asshole. I get it.” She nodded. “Did you do any of this?”
“Yeah, totally. I had the time to go hunting for thousands of fairy lights and all that shit.”
“Sorry. I guess that was a stupid question, wasn’t it? You’ve got way too much stuff to do than to hang lights and decorate.”
“Where did they find you?”
She giggled. “You’re not used to me?”
“No, I’m not even close. You’re completely opposite from Emily. It’s not even funny.”
She chuckled. “Sorry. I’m not laughing at you, I promise.” She held her hand up but gripped my arm tighter.
This girl pissed me off.
We walked across the lawn and she kept on talking. I didn’t know why she felt the need to keep on speaking. I had no interest in what came out of her mouth. There was no reason to stop her even though with her constant noise, she’d started to give me a headache.
“Oh, my God, she’s gorgeous.”
I’d kept moving but was pulled back as Ashley stood still. Her words caught my attention, and I glanced at her, but she looked across the path, near the bridge. Fairy lights had been hung along either side of the bridge. She stood alone, which I didn’t like. but Ashley wasn’t wrong.
She looked so beautiful.
The purple dress she wore—I thought was an ugly color—captured my attention. It molded to her curves. Even the short distance away, I saw how it shaped and pushed her tits up, pressing against the front. The strap wrapped around the back of her neck, giving her support. When she turned away, it showed her exposed back.
The bodice of the dress had to be tight enough to keep her tits in. From her tits, it hugged to her hips and then flared out. Her long, blonde locks had been spiraled. The true length made me want to run my fingers through it. Small flowers had been placed in her hair, and when she moved, sparkles came off her.
I wanted her.
“Well, I’d say this is my cue to leave, but go and get her. Don’t let her get away.” Ashley shoved me toward the woman of my dreams.
I kept on walking, not stopping.
Emily turned and I saw her looking for someone, and then she caught sight of me. Now, when it came to this girl, I knew for a fact, she wasn’t the easiest girl to get to smile. Seeing her now, and those eyes, all of it, she made me ache for her in the best kind of way. That smile, all for me, took my breath away.
She moved toward me and I took her into my arms, not caring who saw as I cupped the back of her head and kissed her.
Sliding my tongue across her lips, I captured my woman, kissing her so she knew, without me needing to say words, exactly what I felt.
I stopped the kiss, but I noticed she gripped the lapels of my jacket.
“Wow,” she said.
She hadn’t pushed me away, nor did she look around to see who saw us.
This was progress. She was like this with all of us.
One day, she wouldn’t need to worry. I didn’t care what our dads thought was right. If they had any respect for Bethany at all, they’d allow us to keep our woman.
“Hey, you … wow.”
She giggled. “You like it? I was so worried. Look at it. It’s gross. I like purple but I didn’t think it worked as a dress.”
“It’s stunning. You are, and you have nothing to worry about.” I cupped her hip. “Wait until the other guys see you. They’re going to lose their minds.”
“I haven’t seen them.”
“Where’s Caleb?” I asked.
“I don’t know. I waited for him, but my driver ended up dropping me off. The others went before me.” She shrugged. “I was worried I’d be turned away at the door.”
“Anyone who dared to turn you away will be shot.”
This made her smile.
She took my hand, locking our fingers together. “So how about you make my night and dance with me?”
****
Emily
I hoped I was fooling everyone who looked. I wasn’t calm or collected. I was fucking terrified. There were so many people here. What startled me was how I saw some politicians, businessmen, but also all the people who made their money in illegal deals. Crooks, criminals, and civilians. It was kind of funny.
This wasn’t news to me how the good and evil lived side by side, constantly rubbing together. I guessed I never expected it to be so blatant, but that was what made the best kind of parties.
There were good people here who had no choice but to be in the pockets of those who did the dirty work. This was how it worked.
There was a dancefloor near Caleb’s house, and Gael walked me toward it. He’d stopped talking and texted on his phone. I didn’t mind the lack of attention. It gave me a chance to look at the beauty.
Even if the party had been thrown by monsters, they certainly knew how to hide their true nature.
So beautiful.
I love fairy lights. They lit up the night sky so perfectly.
Gael cursed and shoved his phone into his pocket.
“What is it?”
“Nothing.”
“Gael, don’t treat me like I’m a kid.”
“Believe me, I don’t think of you as a kid.”
“Then talk to me.”
We arrived at the dance floor, and he pulled me into his arms. Chest to chest. Body to body. We were so close, and it was so perfect. I didn’t want to pull away.
“Do you have any idea how perfect you are?” he asked.
“Don’t go saying all the right words to get me to shut up. That’s not fair.”
“But it’s true.”
I smile. “Come on, don’t be that guy who believes you can think better than me. Please? Please?”
“Fine. Fine. They had to go and pick someone up at the airport. Him and Vadik. They’ll be here in ten minutes. It’s why he couldn’t pick you up.”
“Where’s River?”
“He’s also running an errand. He didn’t tell me what, but he said he’d be here soon.”
“So very vague. Is this what it’s going to be like?” I asked. “You guys keeping me in the dark, thinking you can protect me?”
“You deserve to have a good life.”
I burst out laughing. “Gael, look around you. I could be killed at Crude Hill High. I don’t have a normal life. Out of all of us, the closest person to it is Ashley.”
“I’ve seen her.”
“She came?”
“Yes, she didn’t want to.”
“I know, she told me. Her mom kept saying they weren’t going. Then obviously she changed her mind. How is she?”
“Em, you’ve got to stop playing protector.”
“I’m not.”
“Do you mind if I cut in?” River ask
ed. His brown hair was slicked back. Even though he wasn’t currently holding a knife, I knew one would be on him, if not several.
Gael leaned forward and kissed my cheek. “Of course. I’ll go and get us a drink.”
Once I was in River’s arms, Gael left.
“What’s with the frown?”
“Nothing. I’m fine. Where were you?”
“Just running some errands for Dad.”
I was growing tired of this. I froze in his arms and had every intention of pulling away, but he held me firm.
“Don’t do that,” he said. “I get that you’re not happy, but I was organizing a hotel room for a guest. That’s all. Nothing dirty. Nothing illegal. Stop worrying.”
I stared at him. I don’t like to be kept in the dark, not when it came to these guys. “You’d tell me if it was anything to worry about?”
“Yes. You look amazing.”
“Thank you.”
I leaned forward and rested my head on his chest, breathing in his scent. All four of them smelled a little different. With River, I always felt there was a hint of metal on him. I imagined it was because he always held a blade or was constantly teasing a knife within his grip.
His hands stroked down my back.
I allowed myself to relax. I’d never truly been able to. Not with any of these people. They were all after what they could get. Trying to find a weakness, even in the kids. I knew what it was like to live as a minion’s daughter, but I couldn’t imagine life as one of their kids. I’d seen the scars that decorated their body. They were worse than mine.
I didn’t want to even think about what that meant.
All the hours spent hurting. It made me want to kill, to hurt.
“Can I have this dance?” Vadik asked.
River nodded and placed me in his arms.
Vadik surrounded me. I wasn’t used to seeing them so well-kept. They normally wore their uniforms creased and dirty. He pressed a kiss to my cheek. River had already left and I smiled up at Vadik.
“What have you been doing?”
“Nothing.”
I sighed. “I know you went and picked someone up. I know River had arranged some kind of hotel room. Don’t do that.”
“We’re trying to protect you, Emily.”
