by Lily Zante
Instead of hearing his explanation, or lies, she had leapt in the opposite direction and done something equally stupid. So here she was in a taxi with Connor, on the way to Montova.
She’d thought having Connor with her would help her lose herself in the numbness. Nico had ripped out her heart. Connor was her distraction, much like a clown in a circus.
She should have felt bad for using him that way. But she considered it payback. And she was in no mood to be nice today.
He was spurting on about something, but her mind was subdued. She was hanging onto a semblance of normality by the wisp of a thread. The slightest tremor in her world now would send her hurtling down that dark crevice she had been in when she had arrived here.
Connor was asking her if there were any nice restaurants in Montova. He’ll want to share a meal together, thought Ava with a touch of dismay. She would have to make it clear that they would go to Montova and back and nothing else.
The whole point of going to Montova was so that she could check with Andrea about the shipment of all the products she had ordered. She wasn’t sure if Nico had taken care of them, as he had intended to. So much had happened between them lately. And she didn’t want to ask him. She also needed to do a final check of her inventory. She’d been putting it off forever. At times she wondered if she was really ready to leave.
Now that time had come.
There was no way in hell she would accept Nico’s help anymore. She would have to work quickly and not let Connor drag things along, slowing her down. Now that she was removed from the Casa Adriana and Nico, she regretted her decision to bring Connor with her.
What she really wanted right at this moment was to return to the pensione and lie down. She felt more drained than ever and it wasn’t even noon yet.
Connor boldly rested his hand over hers, lightly brushing against her thighs on which her hand rested. “I’m sorry. I’m jabbering on like an idiot.” He laughed, a short little chuckle. This was not the Connor that she knew at all. Connor did not talk this much, let alone worry about her feelings, or seek out her opinions, and least of all chuckle much.
Had the air in Verona changed him, too? It seemed to be having an effect on everyone else around her.
“This must have been a lucky find for you.” He waved vaguely at the outdoors.
“Nico brought me here. He was keen for me to find new products.”
“He was, huh?”
The taxi pulled to a slow stop as they arrived in Montova. Ava got out and wondered exactly what she was getting herself out of, and what she was throwing herself into.
They had been in Andrea’s warehouse no longer than half an hour and already the pride Ava had felt in her new products had ebbed away.
Total insanity had possessed her to allow Connor a glimpse into this new life of hers.
Andrea had stored all of Ava’s products in one corner of the huge warehouse and Ava walked around, checking it all against her list of inventory.
The items she had ordered from Natale’s clothing factory had been sent here, too, keeping everything together in one place.
Ava jerked her head up sharply at another one of Connor’s pointless interruptions.
“I’m not so sure.” He pulled a distasteful face and ran his hand slowly across his cheek, all the while staring at a pile of items neatly stacked along the shelves.
Ava decided to let him have his moment before she had hers. She took a step closer to see what he was going on about. It was a beautifully carved wooden clock face with a string attached to the bottom that, when pulled, emitted a tune from a well-known lullaby.
“What are you not so sure about?”
“I mean…” He toyed with the clock in one hand and pulled the string with the other. Instantly the tune started, a little tinny, but soothing all the same. The clock was beautifully made; it was the kind of toy that was hard to find in the big toy and department stores back home. Ava had fallen in love with it the very first time she’d set eyes on it.
She reached out to pluck it from Connor’s hand but he managed to dodge her easily. In one swift movement he held it beyond her grasp.
“Come on, Ava,” he said, pulling the cord again and setting off the tune once more. “Do you really think children used to bright lights and electronic tunes are going to be interested in this?” He held it up with disdain.
“Their parents will be.”
“I think you’ll find these aren’t going to do as well as you think.” There he went again, stamping his negative opinion on everything. “I’m sorry, Ava, but I thought you wanted an honest opinion.” He handed the clock back to her, then sheepishly looked around at the other merchandise. Spotting a baby crib, he crawled over to examine it in more detail.
“Now this, this looks good. Very authentic.” He ran his hands over the dark finished wood.
“How are you shipping these over?”
“In containers.” She guessed.
“Are these flat packed?”
“Yes.”
“Do you have the necessary insurance in place?”
“Of course. Don’t worry, none of this is your problem.” She forced a confident smile at Connor. Nico would have taken care of all of this. Now she had a bigger headache to contend with, not being familiar with the Italian rules and regulations. Time was running out. She wanted to go home the first flight she could get.
“But does this wood conform to our fire safety regulations?” The thought had not even occurred to her. With a slowly deflating spirit, Ava wished she had not brought Connor here. He had soiled all her brightest dreams with his dour attitude, even if he was right.
She had not thought things through. She had known about fire and safety regulations, but she hadn’t checked them out. This was often her failing, jumping into things feet first and worrying about the consequences later. She was the dreamer, while Connor was the realist.
His personality had always dampened her fire. Was this the basis of their fundamental differences? The thing that had slowly, over time, led to a break in their relationship?
“Sorry about that, Ava.” Andrea appeared suddenly. She had been dealing with a group of buyers for most of the time they had been here.
After a brief introduction to Connor, they all stood around looking at the large pile of products that now belonged to Ava. Ava sucked in her breath sharply and prayed that Connor would not carry on with his withering comments.
“Piled together like this, it really looks a lot.” Andrea’s arm made a long panoramic sweep from one end of the huge neatly piled boxes to the other.
Ava was a little startled, too, and trying hard not to give in to the flood of emotions now swirling around her. She might have gotten carried away when she buying. The pile was huge now that everything was all heaped together. But she had checked her figures twice, and though she had spent a lot, it wasn’t as much as the pile made it look. Andrea had given her good prices. It was the shipping costs she was dreading.
Ava left Connor to his own devices and prayed he would remain interested enough in the products to stay out of her hair for a while.
“I must get on,” she explained to Andrea as she walked toward the opposite side of the store, away from Connor. Andrea followed her and Ava resumed checking things off on her inventory.
Andrea nodded her head towards Connor. “He doesn’t seem as bad as you described him.”
“Something about the air in Verona, I think,” Ava said wearily. “It seems to be having a peculiar effect on most people who come here.”
“Do you know how much it will cost to have this shipped back?” Andrea peered over Ava’s shoulder at her calculations.
“Nico was going to take care if it for me. Didn’t he get in touch with you about it?” She knew he had her Denver address. “Apparently he has contacts who can secure me a good deal.”
Andrea shook her head. “No, he hasn’t mentioned it. But you don’t have to worry if Nico is taking care of it. You’re i
n good hands.”
No, I’m not. You were right all along.
More customers arrived and Andrea headed toward them before Ava stopped her. She pulled her arm gently. “Andrea,” Ava started to say something but the mere mention of Nico had caused tears to well up in her eyes. What was wrong with her? She thought she had recovered from that episode this morning.
“Ava.” Concern shadowed Andrea’s face. She turned her back on the new customers and stared at her friend. “You don’t look so well; what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” Ava struggled to keep her voice level. “I’m going back to Denver, the first flight out—”
“So soon? What about your family?”
“I should have gone home a long time ago.” She fought to hold it all together. “Andrea, I need you to do something for me, please. I will pay you anything. I don’t think I can stay here a moment longer.”
Andrea stood solemnly by her side, refusing to budge. “Just say it.”
“Nico’s real busy now at the hotel. Can you deal with my shipping instead of him? You must have shipping people you use or that your cousin uses? You must get items shipped?”
Andrea shook her head. “We don’t export. All our products are sold here.”
Ava’s face fell.
“But if Nico’s dealing with this then—”
“No.” Ava’s voice took on a pleading tone.
Andrea narrowed her eyes. “Is something going on between the two of you? I knew there was a spark, I suspected as much. Tell me, are you —”
Ava shook her head before Andrea could finish. “It was a mistake. I should have taken your word for it. I should never have gotten involved.” She sniffled and managed to keep the tears at bay.
“What’s happened? Why are you upset? Nico’s a good man, underneath it all. He’s had a lot to deal with over the years.”
“You warned me. I should have listened to you. He can’t be trusted.” She fought back the sobs.
“He’s a changed man, now. He thinks the—”
Ava sniffled, shaking her head. “Andrea, stop. I don’t want to hear it. No more about Nico.” And then before she could stop herself, the tears started falling, faster than she could stop them.
Obviously alarmed by Ava’s sudden breakdown in front of her, Andrea put her arms around her friend and comforted her.
“Hey, hey, now then. It can’t be that bad.” She handed a Kleenex to Ava, who blew like a foghorn into it.
Andrea hushed. “Don’t you worry another minute about the shipping. Leave it to me.”
“You’ve got all my details, haven’t you?” Ava asked, between sobs. She turned her face sideways, as she caught Connor looking over. He was the last person she wanted finding out about her whole sorry fiasco.
Andrea nodded, then touched Ava’s arm. “Don’t you worry at all. I mean it.”
“Thanks, Andrea. I’m so sorry. I thought I had more time. I thought Nico, I—” The tears welled up again as she remembered the time when she had first met Andrea. When Nico had introduced them both. He had known that Montova would be a great place for Ava to find products. He had always wanted the best for her.
Which was why his actions this morning completely confused her.
She didn’t know what to believe anymore. She just wanted to go home.
She felt Andrea’s gentle arms around her again. “I don’t know what happened between you two. I don’t understand. But Ava you really should talk to him.”
Ava shook her head harder. “No,” she said sharply. “I’ve seen enough. I don’t want to talk about it.” Afraid that if she started crying again, she would not stop, Ava begged Andrea. “Please, I can’t let him see me like this.” She nodded in Connor’s direction and Andrea understood.
“When are you going?”
“First flight out that I can get.”
“You take care of yourself, and we’ll keep in touch. Promise me?”
“I promise.”
The women hugged each other tightly before Andrea left her and tended to her new customers.
Connor waved at a wooden drum set at her. “I can see these selling like hotcakes,” he said enthusiastically, before he realized that something was wrong. He rushed towards Ava.
“What’s wrong? You don’t have to hide it from me. I can tell when you’ve been crying. Is it him again?” He had never been so perceptive before.
“No,” she lied. “It’s hay fever.”
“You’ve never had hay fever in your life. Come on, Ava. I might have been out of your life for a while now, but I still know you pretty well.”
Desperate to get some fresh air and to get away, she steeled herself and turned away.
“Come on,” she said, not even turning around to see if he had heard her or not.
Ava had asked the cab driver to return after noon and he should have already been here. Seeing no sign of the taxi outside sent Ava’s mood spiraling again. All she wanted to do was to go to bed.
“Are we heading back already? Let’s grab a bite to eat first.” Connor’s suggestion went down like a lead balloon.
She thought of heading over to Montagnano. Nico’s village. No. She could never go back there again, ever.
She glanced around her at Montova. No more coming back here either.
Chapter 34
While waiting for the taxi, they bought two panini from a nearby sandwich shop even though Ava wasn’t feeling particularly hungry. Her stomach was still queasy from the morning.
These panini were nothing like the ones made by Ermete at the village Nico had taken her to.
Each and every thought in her head seemed to be of her memories to do with Nico.
She would need to get him out of her system super fast. She willed the taxi to come, just so that she could book her flights, pack, and keep her fingers crossed that she would be home by this time next week at the latest.
Connor, who knew no better, having never tasted Ermete’s offerings, was in heaven. The juices from the olive oil infused vegetables dripped out of his panino and trickled down his chin.
“Nico showed you this place, you say?” Connor was on the prowl for more information.
“Yes.”
“I don’t recall seeing this in any of the guides I’ve read.”
“I don’t think it’s a touristy place. It’s a wholesale village. The locals all know about it.”
“The advantages of dating the locals.”
She glared at him.
“How much do you actually know about this man?” asked Connor.
Probably more than I knew about you when I first started dating you.
“Enough.” Ava was beginning to feel uncomfortable with his line of questioning. He was a lawyer after all, and she wasn’t sure where he was taking this. He’d seen her upset and he was fishing for news.
“Nico grew up around here; his village is a little further on.”
Connor took another huge mouthful and half-snorted. “No wonder.”
“No wonder what?”
“No wonder he’s trying to better himself. Shake off his hillbilly roots and pass himself off as some high flying businessman.” There was no holding him back now.
“Are you feeling threatened?”
“No. I’m merely speculating. You can take the man out of the village but you can’t take the village out of the man.” A thinly sliced mushroom balanced precariously on his bottom lip.
She could tell that he hated Nico. But more than anger for the man who had captured her heart fleetingly, in Connor Ava saw contempt as well.
“If you’re suggesting he’s ashamed of his roots, you’re wrong. Nico loves his roots. He’s not ashamed of who he is.” She was talking as though she knew the real Nico and now she wasn’t so sure anymore. Up until this morning she might have thought she had an insight into him. But since then, everything she thought she knew about him had vanished.
She had no idea why she was defending him.
“I don’t
understand what you see in him anyway,” Connor retorted, and silenced Ava at once.
“I don’t want to see you upset again, Ava. This, me badmouthing Nico”—he flailed his hands towards his chest—“it’s wrong. I hardly know the man. The only thing I have against him is that he has you.” He rested his hands on his lap and looked at her with the most honest expression, stripped bare of the arrogant, know-it-all Connor.
“I fucked up. I fucked up when I let you go. And I fucked up when I tried to get you back. But when I saw you had eyes for no one but that man, I couldn’t get in the way and mess things up for you again. So I tried to make you jealous.” He shook his head.
“Silvia? Was that it?”
He hung his head in shame. “It was a pitiful attempt.”
Ava nodded in agreement, half-humbled by his last minute attempt at coming clean. “Look, Ava. I walked away because you looked so happy. In Venice…” His voice trailed off, and she wondered if he had remembered the scene when he had walked in on them.
“It’s fine, you don’t need to—”
“Let me finish, please. I’m going home tomorrow and I’m so happy you gave me this chance to spend the day with you.”
Ava felt suddenly ashamed for the reason why she chose to spend time with him.
“You looked happier than I’d seen you in ages and I knew I had failed. It’s time for me to step aside, not that my attempt at winning you back ever had a chance to get off the ground in the first place.”
She saw the candid look in his eyes and her heart softened. More than anything, his plea to her seemed to be sincere. She warmed at his words, and though she didn’t feel anything like happy today, she managed a half smile.
“I know you’re upset about something. Ever since I saw you this morning, I could tell something was up. But it’s okay. You don’t have to say anything, not if you don’t want to.” She was glad he had no clue that Nico was the cause of her heartache. Better to keep it that way.
“I’m sorry for the hurt I caused you and I hope Nico treats you better than I ever did. I hope he realizes what he’s got in you.”
Ava grimaced at his words. Oh, Connor. You have no idea. But her problem was not Connor’s problem and he need never know. Nobody need ever know what had happened.
