I quietly shut the door and locked it with the key. When I turned around to face Archer, he looked less certain of my plan than he had with Casey and Lucas.
“Ris, maybe we shouldn’t . . .”
“Trust me,” I whispered. “This will work.”
It had to.
As we walked back to our table, I sent up a silent Christmas wish that the mistletoe I’d hung in the supply closet truly did hold a miracle, because I had a feeling Alex and Grant were going to need one.
Chapter Fifteen
Grant
“Is it true?” I asked, trying to hold back the panic sending my pulse into overdrive. “You don’t want to marry me?”
“Grant, I never said that!”
“Okay. That’s fair. But you also didn’t say you wanted to marry me either.”
“Yes I did! You proposed and I said yes.”
“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”
Alex threw her hands up. “I don’t know what everyone wants from me!”
“This isn’t everyone,” I said. “This is me, babe. And I’m asking a pretty simple question. Are you having second thoughts about our wedding?”
“I don’t know, maybe.” Alex groaned and flopped into the chair. “Maybe, I don’t know what I want.”
“I think you do.”
She looked up at me, her eyes full of accusation. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
I took a deep breath, knowing Alex was on the edge. When she got like this, I usually tried to give her space, but in this tiny closet, there was none. And I’d be damned if I was leaving this room uncertain if I still had a fiancée or not.
It’s not like I’d been oblivious to Alex’s anxiety over our wedding plans lately, but I hadn’t thought things were this bad. But if they were, I wanted to know now.
After a few more calming breaths to return my heartrate to normal, I crouched next to Alex. Placing a hand on her knee, I waited for her to look at me. “Alex, I saw your face. You looked like you were staring down an executioner when Marissa asked if you wanted to marry me.” I took her hand. “That’s not the look a guy wants to see on his bride’s face.”
She pulled her hand back. “Then maybe I’m not the right bride for you.”
“Alex . . . How can you say that? You’re the only one for me.”
“Are you sure? Because this is me, Grant. I’m not girly. I don’t want to spend my days picking out china patterns or the perfect place settings. I don’t care what my wedding dress looks like. If it was up to me, I’d wear my baseball jersey.”
“I know that, Alex. That’s why you’re the only girl I want to marry. I don’t care about those things either.”
“But maybe you deserve a girl who does.”
“Are you trying to change my mind?”
Did she really not want to marry me?
Was this her version of the ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ speech?
Fueling my fears, Alex stood up and walked to the door instead of answering my question.
“Alex! We need to talk about this.”
“Yeah, but not on Christmas Eve.”
“Then when?” I yelled, finally losing patience. “When we’re standing at the altar? Because if you’re not going to go through with this just tell me now.”
Her hand was on the knob, jiggling it to no avail. “It won’t open.”
“Alex . . .”
“We’re locked in here!” Her voice was filled with panic, but so was my heart.
“Alex . . . I need you to answer me.”
She finally stopped trying the knob but still didn’t answer. Instead she turned slowly around to face me, put her back to the door and let herself sink to the floor, taking my heart with her.
That was it then. I had my answer.
I stumbled back and found myself collapsing into the chair Alex had been occupying moments ago; when the world still made sense.
Right now it felt like the universe was splitting apart. And maybe it was, in which case I hoped I’d be swallowed whole. Because a world without Alex in it . . . That wasn’t a world I was prepared to live in.
I stared at her, my heart refusing to accept this was happening, but everything about her body language told me it was. Alex looked as destroyed as I felt.
What the heck was happening here?
Were we calling off the wedding?
Were we breaking up?
Talking about our feelings wasn’t a strong suit for either of us, but right now, I didn’t care. If this was over, I needed to hear her say it. I needed her to be the one to call off the wedding because I’d never do it. Not in a million years. Not when I’d been envisioning marrying her from the day we first met.
“Alex,” I said, my voice raw with emotion. “Do you really not want to marry me?”
“That’s not what I’m saying.” All the fight had left her voice but that did nothing to dislodge the knife from my heart.
“Then what are you saying?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well say something, please! Because I kinda feel like my whole world’s about to fall apart.”
She stared back at me like a deer in headlights.
“Alex, please, just tell me what you want,” I begged. “Because I know what I want and it’s you. I don’t want to lose you. Not over a wedding. Not if it isn’t what you want.”
“It’s not that,” she said, frustration edging her voice again.
“Then what is it?” I pressed.
“I don’t want things to change.”
Okay, I could work with this! I took a deep breath, clenching and unclenching my fists, trying to get some feeling back in my panic-stricken limbs. “And you think getting married will change things?”
She nodded.
We were getting somewhere. She was just scared. I could fix scared. “What don’t you want to change?”
“Everything.”
I frowned. “Can you be more specific?”
“I don’t know. I just love the way everything is now. I love living in Arizona, I love playing softball, I love our friends, I love our life.”
“I do too.”
“Then can’t we just keep things the same for a little while longer?”
The moment I saw Alex’s lower lip tremble I was at her side, sliding onto the floor with her. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her in close. She buried her face into my chest to hide her tears, tucking her head under my chin.
I’d always loved the way we fit so perfectly together. Like we were made for each other.
Holding Alex was like finding a puzzle piece after years of searching. She was the piece I’d always known I was missing—my other half. I’d told her that before. She had to know there was no way I’d ever let anything get in the way of that. Wedding or not, she was my girl.
“Alex, if you don’t want to get married, we won’t get married.”
“But I do want to marry you,” she sniffled.
“Then what are you afraid of?”
“I told you. I don’t want everything to change.”
“Why do you think getting married will change everything?”
“Because it will! I’ll have to stop playing softball and have a bunch of kids and I’m not saying I don’t want those things, I just don’t want them now. I’m not ready to be the perfect baseball wife like my mom and . . . I’m afraid you’ll end up regretting that you picked me because I’m not that girl.”
“Regret marrying you? Alex, are you crazy? The only thing I’d ever regret is letting you think that. I’m in love with you, for better or worse, whether we have the crazy big wedding your mom is planning or not.”
“I don’t even want a big wedding,” she sniffed.
“You don’t?”
“Of course not! The idea of standing up in front of all those people makes me feel queasy.”
I laughed. “You know you play in front of thousands of college fans on the softball field, right?”
/> “That’s different.”
I tried to fight my smile when I heard the familiar sass in her voice. She returned my smirk with one of her own and the tension in my chest began to ease. “So let me see if I’ve got this straight,” I said. “You still want to marry me, but you don’t want a big wedding?”
She nodded.
“Then why are we planning one?”
“Because my mom is hard to say no to,” Alex replied. “And . . . and I thought you wanted a big wedding, too.”
“Alex I could care less if we got married right here in this storage closet tonight. The only person I need at our wedding is you.”
“Really?”
There was so much hope and relief in her eyes I couldn’t help myself, I pulled her closer and kissed her, deep and slow. “Really,” I whispered against her lips when we came up for air.
She gave me a playful shove. “Why didn’t you tell me that months ago?”
“Because I thought you wanted a big wedding and I just wanted you to be happy.”
“So, we were fighting over nothing?”
I laughed. “Yeah. It seems like it.”
Alex grinned, shaking her head. “We’re idiots.”
I pulled her in for another kiss. “Yeah, but you’re my idiot and I’m yours.”
She laughed and kissed me back. “I guess that’s all that matters.”
“I’m really glad Marissa locked us in here.”
“Me too,” Alex admitted.
I looked up at the not so subtly placed mistletoe. “How did she know we needed to talk?”
Alex shrugged. “It’s Marissa. That’s what she does. Sing and meddle.”
“Well, I’m really glad that’s her thing because if she didn’t lock us in here, I don’t think I would’ve gotten you to actually tell me how you felt.”
Alex wrinkled her nose and gave me an apologetic smile. “That’s what I do, run and avoid.”
“You’re not the only one guilty of that,” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“There’s actually something important that I’ve been putting off talking to you about.”
“What is it?”
“Remember when your brother told me he was going to talk to his coach about me?”
“Yeah?”
“Well, he did, and they sent some scouts to see me play and . . . well long story short, I have an offer on the table.”
“What? Omigod, Grant! Are you kidding me? The Diamondbacks want to draft you?”
“Possibly. I still have to try out and who knows, I’d probably be on the Triple-A team for a while first . . .”
“Grant! That’s still an incredible opportunity. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because if I accept the offer, I have to report to training camp which starts the week of our crazy big wedding.”
Alex laughed. “You mean the crazy big wedding neither of us want?”
“That’s the one.” I took her hand and traced my thumb across her knuckles. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. It’s just you were already so stressed about the wedding . . . I figured if I told you we might have to change the date you’d flip.”
“What gave you that idea?” she teased, poking me in the ribs.
“Oh, you know, just the way you were always the picture of calm as you gushed about our wedding plans,” I said, sarcastically.
Alex laughed. “Again, we’re idiots.” After a moment she said, “But seriously, we’d be even bigger idiots to let our wedding get in the way of this opportunity.”
“There might be other opportunities,” I said.
“Grant, we’re talking about playing professional baseball! Did you forget you want this more than anything?”
“Not more than anything,” I said, my voice full of desire. I captured her lips with mine again, not letting her up for air until I was sure she knew exactly where she rated on the list of things I wanted. “I don’t want anything more than I want to be your husband.”
“Then let’s do it,” she panted, still catching her breath. “Let’s get married right now.”
“What?”
“We can do it in this closet like you said, or during Christmas Carol-oke in front of all our friends, I don’t care, but I’m not letting you give up on your dream.”
“Alex, I just told you. Marrying you is my dream.”
“Yeah, but so is playing professional baseball. And there’s no reason you can’t have both.”
I stared at her in astonishment, her selflessness making her even more attractive to me. “Are you sure?”
“Of course I’m sure.”
“What are we going to tell your mom?”
“That we can get married anytime, but the MLB doesn’t take rainchecks.”
I took a deep breath and ran a hand over my face, letting it sink in. “So we’re really doing this?”
“Postponing our wedding so you can play major league baseball? Heck yes!” Alex took my hand. “I love you, Grant. And I’m so incredibly proud of you. You’ve worked so hard for this. The wedding can wait.”
I pulled her into my arms and kissed her.
“I love you so much, Alex. And the fact that you’d even consider putting my dreams before our wedding . . . it just makes me want to marry you even more.” I grinned. “That’s why I’m not willing to postpone it.”
Her brow creased with concern. “What do you mean?”
“I think I have an idea. One where we don’t have to give anything up.”
“As long as it involves us getting married and you accepting the Diamondbacks offer, I’m in.”
Alex
Grant gave me a quick kiss and pulled me to my feet. “Do you have your phone?”
I reached for it in my back pocket, remembering I’d handed it to . . . “I’m going to kill Marissa.”
Grant laughed. “I think we can cut her a little slack considering she just saved our wedding.”
“You mean the crazy big one we’re canceling?” I teased.
“That’s the one.”
I grinned, loving that we could already laugh about it. It made me feel so much more like myself. Like the old Grant and Alex who laughed and had inside jokes and focused on sports, not drama.
“So, remind me again why we’re thanking her?” I asked, cynically.
“Because without her I wouldn’t have come up with the most brilliant idea ever.”
“And what’s that?”
Grant wiggled his eyebrows and pulled his phone from his pocket. “You’ll see.”
I couldn’t contain my grin as Grant spoke to my parents. They’d been impressively receptive to our change in plans. And I had to hand it to Grant. His plan was pretty brilliant.
“Thank you for being so cool about this,” I said into the phone.
“Of course, sweetheart,” my mother replied. “As long as you’re happy, we’re happy.”
Grant squeezed my hand. “See, this is why I can’t wait to be part of your family.”
My dad’s voice boomed over the phone. “Son, you already are.”
I watched emotions flood Grant’s bright gray eyes as he swallowed hard. He thanked my parents and we both said goodbye.
Grant pulled me into his arms again and I clung to him, inhaling deeply. I loved that he still smelled like summer rain, even in the dead of winter. He was home to me, and I was even more grateful than ever for Marissa’s meddling. Everything was finally coming together the way it was meant to.
Without her we might not have realized our doubts weren’t in each other or our love, rather in conforming to someone else’s plans for our future.
We’d always been the type of people who blazed our own path. That’s what drew us to each other in the first place. So, it made sense that our wedding wouldn’t be normal either.
“So I guess the only thing left to do is tell our friends,” I said. “Assuming we can get someone to unlock this door.”
“If you’re ready I’ll text Lucas to co
me rescue us.”
“I’m ready.”
“Are you sure?” Grant wiggled his eyebrows. “Last chance to change your mind, Princess.”
“My mind’s never been clearer.”
Grant laughed. “If I knew canceling our crazy big wedding would make you so happy, I’d have suggested it a long time ago.”
“Me too!”
Our laughter quickly dissolved into kissing and I couldn’t help wondering if maybe Marissa knew something I didn’t when it came to mistletoe. I wasn’t sure I believed the plant was truly magical or had the power to grant miracles, but I certainly wasn’t going to question it. I had the man of my dreams in my arms and everything felt right with the world again.
The blare of loud Christmas music startled us. “Sounds like they started Christmas Carol-oke without us,” Grant said.
“In that case they can leave us in here all night,” I teased.
“That wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world,” Grant replied with a devilish grin.
I laughed. “I’m not complaining.”
Chapter Sixteen
Archer
“Do you think we should go check on them?” I asked after helping Marissa get the karaoke equipment set up.
She placed a hand on my arm. “Let’s give them a little longer.”
I was doing my best to trust Marissa, but I couldn’t shake my concerns. The look on Grant’s face haunted me. The guy had been shattered after hearing Alex’s hesitation.
I couldn’t blame him. I could only imagine I’d look that way, too.
Losing the girl of my dreams?
I shuddered.
Just thinking about it was like a punch in the gut.
“Are you sure?” I asked Marissa. “They’ve been in there a while.”
She frowned. “I have a feeling they have a lot to discuss.”
“I can’t believe Alex is second-guessing the wedding. They’re perfect for each other.”
“I know,” she agreed. “But life’s funny like that. If you let too much time go by, it has a habit of getting in the way.” Marissa sighed and pulled a smile from nowhere. “Well, I’m gonna go see if I can convince Chris and Nicole to do a song with me to get their mind off Ian for a bit.”
Tomboys Don't Love Christmas Page 10
