She hesitated.
That was good enough for me.
I kissed her, “Remember this?” I put my lips on hers and she relaxed immediately. “You remember.”
“Feel that…” I pressed her back into the door. “That’s what you do to me.”
It was like a switch had flipped, and she went wild. Her lips attacked mine and I nearly came when I felt her nails score across my scalp. Everything became frenzied, more frenzied than I thought possible. She urged me back to the bed until we were rolling around on it, tasting each other. I stripped her bared and felt something I’d never really felt, quiet.
My mind had shut down and all I thought about was her, us, this. What she felt like, what we were doing, what I wanted to do to her. “Spread for me,” I demanded, and watched as her back arched the minute my fingers touched her clit.
“You’re ready,” I took my cock in hand and watched as I fed it inside her. Flick’s hungry pussy sucked me in deep, swallowing me, inch by inch.
We groaned and stilled. “Move, God, please move,” she mewled.
And I did.
Back and forth.
Deeper and deeper, until I knew she was on the edge, her tight walls quivering with that final need. When she moaned louder, I covered her mouth with mine, we didn’t need the kids to wake up and find us like this.
“Damn it, Flick! Shush!” I went back to kissing her, feeling her body ride it out with me was something close to magnificent. It was a damn shame that we weren’t alone in the house because when I felt my cock swell and spill my cum inside her, I wanted to roar and beat my chest like the alpha I was. Feeling her chest expand and contract, under the heavy weight of my body only enhanced my dominating side. “You good?” I smiled down at her and disappointingly, she avoided meeting my eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“That was stupid. The kids.”
“I know. Next time we’ll lock the door.”
“I didn’t mean that!” she whisper-shouted.
Confused, I looked at her again, and felt a level of uncertainty. “What did you mean then?”
“This co-parenting thing works because we have boundaries.”
“You haven’t obeyed any of those for a while, and I think we just obliterated the very few boundaries left.”
“We should be thinking about them. If this goes to shit, I can’t just move on, I live here.”
I pulled out of her and walked to my bathroom to clean up, by the time I’d come back, she was already dressed. “Where you going?”
“My room.” Her face said it all, regret, and I didn’t want that.
I hunted down my faithful drawstring pants and followed her into her room.
“What the fuck, Beckett? We should just forget this and salvage what normality we can.”
“Funny, I like this new normal.” I walked past her and pulled back her bed sheets, they smelled lovely.
“I mean it, if we fuck up, I’ll be the one that has to leave those kids. So, go back to your room.”
“You’ve already decided we’re a fuck up? Harsh.”
“Get out of my bed, or I’ll go back to yours.”
She waited a few minutes and predictably stormed to my room. I waited a few minutes and then shadowed my way back to her. “What are you doing!” She was frustrated and I loved it.
“We sleep together. New normal.” I cocooned her in my bed, making sure she couldn’t get away from me.
“You’re making this worse.”
“Or better,” I challenged, forcing her to be still.
“This is nuts.”
“Can’t sleep with your chatter, babe.”
“Then maybe I’ll chat all night!”
“Give it your best shot.”
Flick huffed and puffed, mumbled about me being an arrogant, unbelievable, asshole and kept up the chatter for about three minutes before she succumbed to sleep, causing me to smile.
My head was quiet.
The voices, the trauma, the constant reminders, all silenced.
It didn’t matter if Flick thought this was a mistake, a disaster in the making, my gut worked on instinct and I knew she was wrong—I never ignored my gut feeling, it had saved my life more times than I could count. As soon as she got with the program, I’d let her in on it all, maybe I’d found someone I could share it all with, someone worthy of carrying that burden with me, someone strong enough.
We’d see, and only time would prove me right on that.
Flick
“You need to let me go.”
As I awoke, I found Beckett entwined around me like a tree and it was terrifyingly beautiful.
Imagine all of your teenage dreams coming true at once and you being unable to handle them because it’s just too good to be true. The thing is, when I muttered that to him, I wasn’t sure whether I meant it because I was worried the kids would find us, or because I wanted him to let me go for forever.
Beckett groaned, and the thought that he might have blanked out last night and he was about to discover me in his bed sent my stomach on a rapid plummet southwards. “Don’t wanna, too comfy.” His voice was cute, yet gruff, but I was glad he seemed okay that I was here.
“You have to, the kids might find us.”
Beckett’s tight grip stayed solid until his arms relaxed and I knew he was finally on board with what would happen if the kids found us. As soon as there was room, I got upright and moved.
“Wait…” I stopped still. “You forgot something.” I looked down—I had all my night clothes on—before looking back at him. Beckett’s eyes shone; it was a good look on him. “My morning kiss.”
“Beckett.” Now was not the time for this, so I turned around, and just like last night, I only knew he was right behind me was when I felt him. “Stop doing that. It freaks me out.”
“Then give me what I want the first time around and I will.”
“This is dumb.”
“Kiss me.”
“The kids could be up at any moment.”
“Kiss. Me.”
“But what if they find us?”
“Stand here bitching too long, they’ll not only find you in here, but they’ll find me stood here with my dick swinging, which is where our family chat will take place.”
“What family chat?”
“Fuck it, I’ll kiss you then.” He spun me around and was still very naked and also very hard. “Something to learn about me, your sass does things to me, and him.” His eyes dropped lower and mine followed automatically.
It was there. Right there. And last night it had been other places, other amazing places that messed with my head and confused me, but all I could think about right then was what it would feel like if I was on top.
“Come back tonight and I’ll let you find out.”
“What?”
“You muttered about being on top. So, unless you want the kids to find us like that now, kiss me and leave.”
That really couldn’t happen now, so I leaned forward and kissed him which, if I’m honest, didn’t improve the situation one bit. And when Beckett had to force us apart, he was chuckling. The last thing I said as I walked away this time was, “Asshole.” To which Beckett full on belly laughed.
I was a hot mess by the time I got to the women’s center.
I’d avoided Beckett like the plague at breakfast, causing me to spill, drop, and break pretty much anything I came into contact with. The kids found it funny that Beckett made lots and lots of jokes at my expense, it was like being a teenager again, providing him with humor and being the subject of much amusement. Not only that, like my teenage self, I swooned and wondered what it would be like to do things with him, only now I knew… for real.
Beckett tried to sneak a kiss while the kids were brushing their teeth and we ended up in some slapping fight that just made him laugh and me get more frustrated. I’d never seen Beckett laugh as much as I had in the last twelve hours.
Had I done that?
Fortunately, I was
saved by Ben, but as soon as his back was turned, Beckett pinched my butt, causing me to drop something else.
On the way to the center, I nearly forgot to stop at a junction, spilled coffee from my keep cup all over my dash, and smashed my head on the trunk lid as I was grabbing some stock books I’d taken home the previous weekend.
“Hey, girl.” Gigi appeared at my desk an hour into the afternoon. “You look flustered. Coffee?”
“God yes.” I pushed my chair back from the desk, the wheels moving too quick, and before I knew it, I’d bashed my head against a shelf on the wall behind me. “Damn!”
Gigi laughed. “Maybe we need something stronger.”
“Hell no! No tequila.” Last time that nearly broke me, and I kissed Beckett, in fact, it was their fault I was in this mess in the first place.
“Relax. I was thinking chamomile.”
“Oh.” I felt like an idiot.
“Did I hear the word tequila?”
“No, Malia, you did not. It’s still daylight out there.”
“Yeah but it’s five o’clock somewhere.”
“Please no,” I begged as she pulled a bottle from a filing cabinet. I kicked myself for not getting rid of it when I’d discovered it last week.
I thought she was about to concede until she produced her cell too and deftly tapped a few buttons. “Yo! Will you get the munchkins from school?” I paused at the same time as she did. “Staff meeting, she might be late.”
Oh no, she didn’t.
She hung up and grinned. “Sorted.”
Oh yes, she did.
“Malia, I can’t drink tequila during the day.”
“You’re right.” She went back to the filing cabinet, put the tequila back, pulled open another drawer and shifted some files. “Vodka is a way more acceptable day drink, less hangover and I’ll even let you mix it.”
Fuck. I didn’t know about the vodka.
Three hours later, I was more than tipsy, and I should have just gone for the tequila. The center was empty, which was probably a good thing as Gigi too was a little drunk and they’d called in Angel, who was never one to miss a girl gathering. All in all, we got a little sauced.
“So, we sleep together, it’s our new normal,” I grumbled, putting on a voice that was supposed to be gruff like Beckett’s.
“I always knew he had moves.” Malia raised her glass and Angel and Gigi clinked theirs against it. “If I didn’t have my own hunk of deliciousness, I might have just orgasmed at that story.” Angel laughed. “But I do, and as I’m halfway to wasted. I’m pretty certain I’ll be having one of those later, anyway.”
She was only halfway to blotto? I’d either have to up my game to hang with these girls or get a new liver on standby.
“Why don’t you look happy?” Gigi pulled the general giddiness of it all back to a more serious note, causing me to sigh.
“More vodka!” Malia decided, poured me four fingers worth, forgot the soda and looked at me. “Go. A problem shared and all that.”
“It’s just, at the moment it feels like the rug will be pulled out from under me at some point.”
“That’s life,” Angel agreed.
“By him,” I finished, interrupting her.
Gigi put her hand on my thigh. “But if you don’t take a chance, then you’re never going to be sure whether it’s right or not.”
Malia’s face turned serious. “It’s not fair of you to take and give nothing back. Why should he get nothing in return?”
“But I’m scared.”
“And he’s terrified,” she threw back.
“I hate that you know more about him than I do.”
There. I’d finally said it out loud.
She looked at me, then to her hands holding her glass and I had no idea what was coming next. “I really don’t, but I saw how much it meant for Wave to have what he’d always been missing. Shadow fought for us when we weren’t prepared to, and a guy that does that deserves his happiness and from what I see, everyone and everything is at arm’s length. Apart from you. Don’t make him regret putting himself out there by not even giving it a go.”
The girls all seemed to agree with her, if they didn’t, they’d be telling me and her something different, because this crew never held back.
“He…” I stopped.
“What?”
I looked at each of them in turn and wondered whether this was a step too far. “He’s troubled.”
“They all are.”
“No. The guy you see is Shadow; the Beckett I know is lost, fighting for freedom, survival even, but Shadow has got him on lockdown and his time in the army did that to him.”
Angel held my eyes. “No one but you knows Beckett Hope; we’ve only come to love Shadow, and if there’s even a chance you can give that back to him, then you have to.”
I didn’t get a chance to answer, the door opened and in walked the man himself. We all stopped and swooned. They might have hot biker guys of their own, but you were dead inside if this man didn’t set your heart racing. “Shall I go out and come back in?”
“Where are the kids?” I blurted out.
“Hello to you too, baby.”
Malia and Gigi sighed.
“Christ. First you hold interviews at a biker clubhouse and now staff meetings that involve a liter of vodka. Maybe you should look for alternate employment sweetheart.”
“Uh… Hello! Kids?”
“I see being drunk has only helped max the dial up on your sass.”
“Beckett! Answer me!”
My three new friends sat back and watched all of this with delight.
“In the truck. Lila’s covered in what looks like clay and Ben’s still in his football gear. We’re going to Wendy’s.”
“Wendy’s isn’t wholesome food.”
“Neither is vodka, but my live-in cook thinks that’s acceptable.”
I was about to launch into a tirade, but Malia got there first. “Shadow, stop being an ass.”
“Exactly!” I jumped up and the room swayed a bit. “He’s an asshole.”
“Only for you, baby, let’s hustle.”
“I can’t go to Wendy’s.”
Beckett folded his arms and raised a brow. “Why?”
“Do you want a list?”
He looked to the heavens. “Another fucking list. Let’s have it.”
“Lila’s dirty and covered in clay. Ben’s dirty and is in his football gear, and I’m feeling a little… wobbly.”
Slowly his impatience fled, and a grin formed on his face. “I know. I only hope you’re still like this when we’ve speed fed the kids at Wendy’s, got ‘em clean, and locked them in their rooms.”
“Beckett,” I whined. “I don’t want people to know… you know.”
“Know what? That I’ve had you once and plan on repeating that?”
“Beckett!”
“Multiple times. Cute as this is, got two kids, a drunk old lady and a unicorn to see to. You coming, or am I carrying you out?”
“I’ll be out in two.”
He said goodnight to the girls and stopped before he walked back out of the door. “Your men are inbound. She ain’t outside in two, I’m gonna be unhappy.” The smile on his face said the opposite, in fact, it was clear he’d probably really like it.
The minute the door was closed Angel smiled. “Anyone else hear that?”
“What?” I asked.
Malia clapped her hands. “I did.”
Gigi grinned. “Me too.”
“What?” I wailed again, desperate to be let in on it.
“He just called you his old lady.”
I didn’t need Jax from Sons of Anarchy to tell me that this was a big deal, the look on the faces of these women conveyed that perfectly.
Shadow
“Why is Aunty Flick stumbling?”
“She’s drunk.” Ben told Lila on a sigh.
“What’s drunk? Think she’s gonna fall.”
I stood holding the pa
ssenger door of my ride open, trying not to laugh. “She’ll be okay.” Fuck, she was cute. It was hilarious watching her try to pull it together for the kids, but I knew if I laughed, she’d kill me, and to be honest, I wanted to get her in bed before she did that. I loved the fight in my girl; I was also desperate to find out just how drunk she was.
Flick and Lila sang all the way home, it was to some cheesy song on the radio that made my fucking ears bleed, the only respite was when Lila screeched, “Wendy’s!” before proceeding to bounce up and down in the back. “Pancakes! Pancakes!” It was a good job she was buckled into the car seat, otherwise she’d have been off and running before I pulled the jeep to a stop.
“Wait here,” I ordered. Twenty minutes later and loaded down with a rack load of food containers in bags, I handed them to her. She was still swaying in the front of the car. The thought that I was definitely going to have to carry her made me laugh.
“What?”
“You’re all kinds of cute when you’ve been on the juice.”
“Beckett,” she hissed as I drove away, and her eyes flitted to the little people in the back sat behind us. I’d have to put that right later, now I’d found my groove I didn’t want secrets to halt the progress, and if we were going to give this a go, hiding it from the kids wasn’t the way. I’d seen too many people think they had a tomorrow, and another day after that, only to see them lose it or have it taken from them, by me.
The kids raced from the car and into the house while I grabbed the food and helped Flick out of the car. Before she could take a stumbled step away from me, I cornered her. “Forget something?”
Her brow furrowed. “No, I have my purse.”
“Anything else?”
“Apart from my car, but obviously I can’t drive like this.”
“I meant this.” With her body flush against the cold metal of my ride, I towered above her and took her lips. She melted for about fifteen seconds, until she remembered who she was, who I was, and where we were.
“Beckett, the kids might see.”
“Don’t care who sees. We kiss when we haven’t seen each other all day, and we definitely kiss when you’re wasted and I’m looking forward to gettin’ me some later.” Her first reaction was to rub her thighs together. “See, you are too.”
Flick (The Black Sentinels MC Book 4) Page 12
