* * *
My body still felt broken.
The sting of the truth still felt like venomous poison working itself into my soul.
I was still trying to get to grips on all that happened. All of it.
Jude, Alex, everyone and everything.
I wished I could have taken the time to savor the excitement a normal guy would feel after getting engaged to the woman of his dreams.
I wished I could, but confliction still filled me from the rawness of everything.
I tried to push it aside when I was around Ava. I did it too when everyone was congratulating us, and I guess I did when I took a moment to acknowledge that I was finally happy. I had my angel. I lived to see her again, and I got the girl.
We had a second chance to do what we wanted to do, and she wanted to be with me. That was a door I’d never expected to open again.
However the confliction was still there, and I was sure everyone could feel it in their own way. They knew Jude, and those Like Ava who’d just met him understood how I must have felt.
I’d left her about an hour ago, and I went to the park across from the garage. I just needed to think about what I was going to do next.
I sat on the hill now looking over the city lights against the night sky. Jude was at the forefront of my mind. The depth of his level of treachery spanned over the last eight years. Right back to Henry.
His greed caused me so much pain. His greed caused me to carry the guilt of Marissa’s death. No, I would never stop blaming myself for what happened to her. It was just that knowing the truth didn’t exactly help either.
It didn’t have to be that way. He didn’t need to involve her.
The man was an opportunist who had wormed his way into every bad situation that had affected our lives and made it a hundred times worse. Working for Joe Manello.
Then there was Alex.
No one had seen, nor heard from him. We didn’t know where he went or if we’d see him again.
A week had passed since the incident took place. A week of us searching for him, and scouring the place for Joe, Barabbas, or anyone else that had been part of the crew.
We’d come up with nothing. I had Cora check everywhere before she went back to LA. Joe, Barabbas and company had become ghosts again. Disappearing and going off grid like nothing ever happened.
Footsteps sounded behind me, and I turned on instinct, ready to whip out my gun, but stilled when I saw Alex.
He stood paces away and held my gaze for a few seconds then came over and lowered next to me. I faced him, looking at the sullen expression on his face. He looked awful. Unkempt and emotionally battered.
We sat in silence, in more awkwardness. Me looking at him. Him staring ahead.
“I’m sorry.” I spoke first. Really I wanted to say thanks for saving me, but that felt wrong.
“I suspected him, Claudius. For a while. Right back to Henry. It was the way he and his family were taken. The timing and everything. Someone who knew him had to have known all those details. Same with Marissa. Only a few people knew about the safe house. The dead giveaway for me was him taking Ava. Goliath didn’t know Marissa had a twin, and he for damn certain wouldn’t have known where to find her, unless if someone told him. I just didn’t want to believe it was true. That it was Jude. He was my brother. Close to me, like you and Luc, but clearly, that was just in my mind.”
“I didn’t want to believe it either.” I offered. “Even at the last second, before I shot him.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t say something sooner. Maybe things could be different. Maybe not. Maybe this was how it was supposed to be. A person working both sides like that can never truly survive.”
“What do you want to do?” I was well aware that I no longer had The Four anymore.
“I don’t know.”
“You saved me and you saved my father. I couldn’t have done what you did.”
“We all saw that,” said a voice from behind us.
It was Dante. Gio was with him.
Alex smirked when he looked at them. “Did you now?”
“Yes, and you win hands down. None of us can do what you did.” Gio nodded with a lopsided grin.
“We came to find you, boss,” Dante explained. “Ava told us you went out.”
“It’s a bonus you’re here,” Gio said to Alex.
A still silence drifted between us.
“What now. What happens now?” Dante asked, shuffling his weight. “It all feels weird.”
It did feel weird.
“Maybe if we stick together, the weirdness will go,” Alex suggested. We all looked at him. “But next time, if I give any of you cause to not trust me, you have to ask me.” He looked at Dante when he said that.
“Yeah, message received,” Dante answered.
“Me too,” I added.
“And me.” Gio nodded.
“I’m not Jude. I’m sorry for his betrayal. It’s going to take me awhile to get past it, and to… grieve. But you trust me.”
I felt worse.
“It’s on me,” I told him.
He shook his head. “No, no more of that, Claudius. It’s over. It’s as simple as that. If I’m staying, then I want to move forward and be the badass guys we set out to be. Leave the past in the past.”
It was advice I’d take too. I needed to. Leaving the past behind was something I had to do if only for Ava’s sake. There wasn’t a damn thing I wouldn’t do for her.
Not a damn thing. Finally, she was mine, and I couldn’t wait to spend the rest of my life with her.
“Leave the past in the past,” I reiterated.
“Agreed. And The Four still ride?” Dante asked. He looked at each of us. “There’s four of us. We could still be The Four. We just have our leader in the mix.”
I looked at them all and nodded.
“Yes. I like that.” The Four did still ride.
I’d always been a part of the crew.
Epilogue
Ava
* * *
Ten months later …
It was the first time since Marissa’s funeral that Claudius and I had stood at her grave together.
Normally, I’d visit her grave at least once a month. In the past I aimed for more than that. Sometimes it was painful because I couldn’t believe she was gone. Other times were me honoring her. I’d bring flowers of different colors. Something symbolic for what she’d wear at that time of year. Flowers and a card.
Since the day Claudius told me the truth I found it hard to visit and I hadn’t been since that day.
Now I stood here with him, I felt bad that I hadn’t been, but him being here offered something that steadied my soul and I felt that thing I’d wanted for the last ten months.
A release.
A release from the hurt I felt knowing how Marissa betrayed me.
It was because of him.
I hadn’t come all these months because I thought it would be disrespectful to come here bearing such angst for the dead. It couldn’t be good. Not especially with the way she died.
We met Ma and Pa like usual. They came back from Italy two days ago for this. This time they left Claudius and me alone.
All the time we stood here with them I battled with that inner turmoil. It made me want to be the way I used to be when I came here, but part of me hung on to what she did to me.
However, it wasn’t until my parents left that I felt that release.
Claudius, knelt down and placed a white rose on her grave. Then he stayed there for a few minutes just looking.
She may have done a lot to me, but it was him that she wronged the most. She pretended to be me, and seduced him to sleep with her and got pregnant.
Claudius presented this ruthless person to the world. Everyone knew who he was, but there was another side of him that showed the greatest compassion.
He’d stayed with her even when he didn’t need to.
He forgave her. He forgave her… so I could too.
He stood up and looked at me.
“I should leave you two to talk,” he began. “It’s not the same if I’m here. It never was. She’d want to talk to you alone.”
A tear ran down my cheek. He reached out, caught it and placed a kiss on my forehead before leaving me.
I watched him walk down the path until he turned to go through the grove of trees and I couldn’t see him anymore.
That was when I returned my focus to the grave and the lightness from the release filled me.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been by. We had our differences when you were alive, but we always talked to each other when we were upset. Marissa. I can’t lie, you really hurt me. What you did really hurt me. It’s hard to be upset with you because it’s not fair. What happened to you was so much worse than my feelings. I was hurt deeply, and I’m still hurt, but I love you too much to stay mad at you forever. So I forgive you. I forgive you. I’ll see you next week.”
I set down my lilies and blew a kiss to her.
That was all I had to say today. Next week when I came back I promised myself I’d be in a different mood.
Walking back to the car I saw Claudius and my heart lifted. He was my future. Finally and I couldn’t wait to be his. Our wedding was just six months away.
I couldn’t wait.
* * *
One month later ….
I was pretty certain we were both going to die.
Our families were going to kill us. The both of us. Claudius and me.
We’d spent months planning our wedding but…
We eloped.
We’d eloped and got married yesterday.
When I thought of all the hard work our friends and family put in for our dream wedding I knew we’d be dead the minute they saw us again.
Kelly would kill me herself.
I didn’t know how this crazy idea of ours happened, but it did. We’d simply gone to the cake shop in town to meet with the cake decorators. I’d liked the three-tier cake the decorator had previously shown us in her portfolio. She, however, introduced us to a five-tier cake she’d thought was us with a princess-like feel because apparently, I reminded her of a princess. It was a nice compliment, but we hated the cake design.
We didn’t say anything. We didn’t need to. We just looked at each other and knew. Then Claudius took my hand and led me here.
Here, to Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic.
We got here three nights ago. Got married on the beautiful white sand beach and then confined ourselves in our beach hut. Or maybe the correct term was water bungalow because we were surrounded by the glorious Caribbean Sea.
We’d made it inside and tried to leave several times to explore the island, but we were too lost in each other. At least we had food and water.
We attempted to leave again just now and even managed to get dressed and get outside. The plan was to have dinner at one of the seafront restaurants, but then Claudius looked at me, and we both got sucked into the throes of ecstasy. He picked me up and turned right around. Carrying me right back to bed.
“Claudius, you’re crazy.” I giggled against his lips. He rolled me over so that he was on top of me.
“Yes, we know this.” He chuckled, placing fiery kisses down the side of my neck.
His hair had grown longer. The length I liked, so when his locks fell forward, he looked even sexier.
I called him crazy, but the truth was, we were both crazy together.
A wicked smile lit up his handsome face, and he stripped me naked, then shrugged out of his own clothes.
I didn’t know why we bothered with clothes. We’d become passion’s slaves, and it didn’t look like we were getting set free anytime soon.
And I didn’t want to be.
I was in love with being in love with my husband. My husband.
His cock seared into me, plunging into me and filling me completely before I could bask in the dream of him being mine. Then again, I’d been doing that every second of every minute of every hour of every day for months.
He was mine. Like he’d always been. My dark angel.
My dark angel who completely consumed my mind, body, and soul every time he made love to me.
His untamed touch heated my body, awakening every single cell within me, and I welcomed his relentless thrusts that hammered into me in a sizzling hot rush of need.
That was the last thing I was aware of as my mind left this plane of existence and fire scorched me clean. My body just gave into the scandalous pleasure that gripped it.
I was only brought back to reality when a greedy orgasm forced me back.
We both came together. Fingers locked, eyes locked on each other. Sweat dripping from our bodies.
“Jesus, Ava. I can’t get enough of you. I always want more.” He nuzzled my neck and tickled my skin with his hot breath.
“It’s a good thing I feel the same.” I reached up and cupped his face.
He caught my hand and stared at my rings. My wedding ring and my beautiful engagement ring. We both smiled at each other.
“You’re mine, Angel Doll.”
“I am, and you are mine. Finally.”
“I was always yours. Always.”
“Me too,” I said on the edge of a breath. “Me too, Claudius.”
That was a no-brainer, and nothing was truer than that. We belonged to each other.
“Well, at least we can go down together when everyone finds out what we did.” He laughed.
It was such a good sound.
“I plan to tell them we…”
He waited, but I didn’t know what the hell I was going to say.
“We what, Doll?” He chuckled.
“I don’t know.”
“How about we just don’t care, Mrs. Morientz?”
“I like that, boss.” I nodded, shuffling the sheets behind my head.
“I love when you call me that, boss.”
“Me boss?” I smiled.
His lips arched. “Angel Doll, you were always the boss of me. Come here.” He crooked his finger, beckoning me to his lips, and I went.
Lust burned my brain, and I couldn’t think of anything better than feasting on him.
Dirty Hearts: A Bad Bod Mafia Romance Page 26
