Maybe the only thing scarier than never getting your child back was getting them and then losing them again.
I squeezed both of Juno’s hands.
“I promise.”
* * *
The sun was going down on another day in Brightbirch, and the mountain chill was back in full force, making me shiver as I walked the brick road back to our tent dwellings. I wondered if Jace had returned yet from his mysterious conversation with Cloyd. I wanted to see him as soon as I could, to tell him all about Juno. But I definitely didn’t want to see Cloyd yet.
As I walked, I thought back to the meeting that morning. My phone had been entirely silent since, so if things were being decided between the Little John leaders, they weren’t involving Team Hood yet. The stagnation was a troublesome reality, which was why Team Hood’s decision to investigate on our own seemed so important. But even though Little John as a whole didn’t seem to have made any progress, I felt happier and more fulfilled in my own goals. I had finally learned who Juno really was. I had learned about my birth and the details of my redistribution. I had started developing a bond with my mother that I knew would only grow over time. And even though I would never be able to see or speak to my father in person, I felt more connected to him than I ever had.
But I was still acutely aware of not having made any real progress when it came to getting my own daughter back. And not even the thrill of having found Juno could make me forget that fact.
“Robin?”
I whipped around to look in the direction that the voice had come from, my heartrate picking up. It was almost completely dark outside, and as far as we knew, there was an enemy among us who was willing to sell us out or kill us. Tensions were high. And I realized for the first time how scared that made me when I was alone in the dark.
But there was nothing to fear. The voice came from Henry, who was standing by himself a few feet behind me. I had been so lost in my thoughts that I hadn’t even heard him approach.
“Henry,” I breathed out in relief.
“I hope I didn’t scare you,” he began uncertainly. Even in the growing darkness, I could tell that he looked the worse for wear. His eyes were sunken, as if he hadn’t been sleeping much recently.
“No, you’re fine,” I assured him. “I scared myself. Are you okay?”
He began to trace circles into the brick road with the toe of one of his boots and looked down. “I don’t know,” he answered quietly.
I was struck by his honesty. Henry had never been a particularly emotional or vulnerable guy, even in the immediate aftermath of losing Hope. So his admission was a startling one.
“What’s wrong?” I asked him with genuine concern.
“I’m not sure,” he replied.
The answer was less than satisfying, but I waited for him to elaborate. When he remained silent, I took a step toward him.
“You know you can always talk to me,” I said gently. The night was quiet and still, and we were alone on the road. It was as safe a space to speak as any.
“I know,” Henry said. “I guess I’m just not sure how to explain it.”
I kept my eyes trained on him, a sense of unease beginning to wash over me, like I knew what he was going to say.
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
My eyes widened. I hadn’t been expecting that question and sputtered slightly over my response.
“I-I,” I began. I stopped and tried to gather my thoughts. “Of course.” But I knew from the delivery that my response wouldn’t be very assuring.
Henry looked wounded, and I tried again.
“Henry, I trust you. I’m sorry, I just wasn’t expecting that question. Why are you asking?”
“I feel like I have a magnifying glass on me,” he replied. “Like everyone is side-eyeing me. Like—”
He paused ominously, a darkness passing over his face.
“Like people think that I’m the mole,” he finished.
Finally, he had said it. My fears were realized. All of that time, even after my conversation with Nathan, I still thought that maybe the suspicion I felt from my friends and team members was all in my head. But Henry had just confirmed otherwise, and he was feeling the pressure, too.
“Who makes you feel that way?” I asked.
“Well, I noticed your team was pretty tight-lipped around me last time I saw them. Like maybe they doubt that we could’ve run into each other so randomly back at the truck stop. And now even my own team members have started distancing themselves.” He shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just imagining it. But I’m feeling isolated and confused.”
“Has Nathan talked to you?” I asked. I immediately regretted it.
Henry’s eyes widened with surprise and then narrowed in confusion. “No. Why would he?”
I tried to cover my tracks. I didn’t want Henry to know that Nathan had said anything to me when Corona had called me into Fiora’s office for the private meeting.
“Well, if people are really suspecting you, then Nathan would probably have asked you some questions himself. If he hasn’t, then maybe it’s a good sign,” I replied. I hated lying to him. But I also didn’t see any good in confirming his suspicions. It would just make him feel worse.
Henry didn’t look convinced.
“Robin, is there something that you aren’t telling me?”
I looked deeply into his eyes. The only light around us now came from the stars and moon, but out here in the middle of the wilderness that still made for a surprisingly bright evening.
“I trust you, Henry,” I finished resolutely. Maybe I wasn’t telling him everything. But I did trust him. And that was all he needed to know for now.
“Thank you,” he said softly.
It broke my heart to see him looking so worried and pathetic. Especially since I knew that his instincts were accurate. People were suspecting Henry. And as much as I wanted to fight it, I didn’t know how to feel about it.
Maybe a little part of me suspected him, too.
“Do you want to walk back to the tents with me?” I asked. Henry wasn’t in the tents that Team Hood had pulled together, but I thought I could at least provide him some company to get back to the rest of our group.
“Thanks,” Henry said. “But I think I need some more time to think before I go back.”
I nodded. I could understand that feeling, since I had been thinking the same thing since we arrived in Brightbirch. The beauty and isolation of the base was a double-edged sword. On one hand, it was incredibly peaceful. But that type of quiet could sometimes amplify the anxieties bouncing around in your head.
Or at least it did for me.
“Well, I’ll see you around, then,” I said.
Henry nodded and turned to continue walking along the brick road away from the tents. I watched him briefly as he walked. But I knew he wanted to be alone, so soon I was back on my path toward the Team Hood corner of Brightbirch’s tent city.
Numerous firepits had been built among the tents when I got back. Little stacks of thin logs and kindling were burning brightly in the cool night, surrounded by rings of rocks. Families and teams and couples sat together to enjoy the warmth of the firepits.
I was delighted to see that Team Hood had a sizable firepit of its own. But as I approached, I was less delighted to see that there were only two people there, their faces eerily lit by the orange flames.
It was Jace and Cloyd.
My heart leapt into my throat. What should I do? There was no way to get past them and into my tent without being seen. I decided to turn around and try to get away from the situation entirely. I could go take another walk or see if there was still food left on the picnic tables. I just wanted to do anything to get away from what was very likely a hostile scenario.
But before I had the chance to escape, Jace looked up and made eye contact. Then, to my despair, he waved me over.
Ugh. Today had been emotionally exhausting enough. And now this?
But
Jace and Cloyd were both looking at me expectantly, and I knew that I didn’t have any other option. So I swallowed hard and tried to look as confident as I could before I began to walk toward them.
13
As I approached the men, I tried to read their expressions to better understand what I was getting myself into. Jace’s face was as kind and handsome as it always was. If anything, he somehow looked even more attractive in the soft glow of the crackling fire, and his honey irises were alight with a reflection of the flames. Cloyd’s expression was harder to read. His eyes were red-rimmed, as if he had just been crying. I wasn’t sure yet what that meant, or what that meant for me specifically. Was I about to get an apology? Or a stern talking-to about my “theft” of Jace?
The team had carried over a few pieces of wood to create a little circle of seats around the fire, and I took a seat across the fire from Jace and Cloyd, feeling like I had positioned myself for an interrogation. Then I waited. Jace had called me over here, so I was going to make him talk first.
To my surprise, it was Cloyd who began our conversation.
“Robin,” he began softly, “I want to apologize to you for my behavior.”
I sucked in my breath and held it there, waiting for Cloyd to continue.
“And not just for last night. For the past few weeks, as well,” he said. “I’ve been a real animal. And you didn’t deserve any of that.”
It was nice to hear. But after weeks of Cloyd’s hostility, I was having a hard time believing that he could change his mind so quickly.
“Thank you,” I responded simply, looking down. What else was there to say?
“I don’t blame you for doubting that,” Cloyd said.
I looked up and held eye contact with him across the fire. I wasn’t going to argue. I did doubt it. It was hard to have trust in his sincerity, especially after his behavior at the funeral. He had been so full of hatred just twenty-four hours before. What had changed?
“But I do mean it,” Cloyd said. “And I’ll prove it to you if you’ll give me the chance.”
Neither of us broke our stare. I was certainly willing to give him that chance. Mostly for Jace, who was looking at me with a loving gaze. If Cloyd meant something to Jace then he meant something to me, too.
“Of course,” I replied with a nod.
Cloyd half-smiled. Then he stood and turned to Jace.
“See you in the morning, brother,” he said. Jace smiled and shook his hand. Then Cloyd turned back to me. “Goodnight, Robin. Keep an eye on this big lug. Don’t let him get into any trouble.”
I smiled, happy to get a little humor out of Cloyd to lighten the mood.
“I always do,” I replied.
Cloyd smiled in return. Then he turned and walked back to a tent and went inside, leaving Jace and me alone by the fire.
“Where is everyone?” I asked, standing to go sit beside Jace on the other side of the fire. I wanted to ask about his conversation with Cloyd, but first I wanted to know whether or not we were going to be interrupted.
“Everyone retired for the night,” he replied. “You were gone for quite a while. It’s pretty late.”
I looked up at the bright moon. Time must’ve slipped away from me during the tumult of the day.
“I guess you’re right,” I said. And then, before I could ask about Cloyd, Jace spoke.
“How did it go?” Jace asked.
I smiled. He knew me so well that I didn’t even have to tell him where I had been. “Really well,” I replied.
“I knew when we first saw her,” Jace said with a grin. “You look like her. And you’re both magnets for getting into trouble.”
I laughed. I didn’t mind being compared to Juno at all. In fact, I loved the idea that people could see our similarities. It made me feel even closer to her.
“I want you to meet her soon,” I said. I couldn’t believe that I finally had the chance to introduce them to each other. It was like finding pieces of a puzzle that was finally coming together.
All that was missing was Hope.
“I’m excited to meet her,” he said, reaching over and placing a warm hand on my leg.
I took his hand and held it tightly. It felt good talking about Juno, but I had other things on my mind as well. “What happened with Cloyd?” I asked.
Things had certainly changed in the hours since I had been gone. What had Jace and Cloyd said on their walk into the mountains that could’ve given Cloyd such a change of heart?
“Before I tell you what he said, maybe I should explain some things about Cloyd,” Jace began.
I nodded, signaling for him to continue.
“Cloyd had a family once,” Jace said. “Before the raid. And he lost them when the agents came. He lost his pregnant wife. And I knew he felt a lot of guilt for that, but I didn’t know exactly why until today.”
My chest tightened. I knew that the regime was ruthless and that Jace and his friends had suffered some terrible losses during the raid, but it was still a shock to hear just how much they had all suffered. I squeezed Jace’s hand again in a show of support.
“I thought his guilt was because he couldn’t save them. But all this time he blamed himself for the entire raid,” Jace continued. “You see, Cloyd was the one who initially met with Nathan’s scouts and enlisted us to work with him. And when the agents found us, Cloyd thought it was because we had opened ourselves up to the outside through Nathan. Before then, we had never even spoken to outsiders, and that had kept us safe and hidden. Cloyd was afraid that the scouts had somehow been tracked back to us, causing the raid. And he blamed himself for that.”
Suddenly I felt a sympathy for Cloyd that I never had before. Not only had he lost a wife and his unborn child, but he placed the blame for the entire raid—all those deaths—solely on himself. That must’ve been a huge burden to carry. I even remembered how his original screenname, from back before we had ever even met Nathan, had mentioned being a dad. I wondered why I hadn’t made the connection before. But while I could imagine his pain, I still didn’t see how it was connected to me.
Jace seemed to anticipate the question. “And apparently when he saw us together, it reminded him of what he lost. He was bitter,” Jace said. “And I have to give him a lot of respect for admitting that. It doesn’t excuse it, but I think he’s genuine in his apology. I forgive him. And it’s up to you if you want to.”
I was touched by Jace’s insistence that the decision to forgive was my own. Cloyd’s behavior had hurt me and caused me undue stress over the past few weeks, but understanding why he had been so upset with the relationship that Jace and I shared helped me realize that it wasn’t as simple as it seemed. And I was ready to move forward as a team once again.
“I forgive him,” I told Jace.
Jace smiled broadly. “Thank you,” he said.
* * *
I awoke with a start the next morning. Something was wrong. I was groggy and confused, but I knew somehow that there was danger nearby. I just couldn’t understand why I thought that in the early morning haze. Then it hit me.
Airships. I could hear airships coming down on us.
Jace startled awake at the sound seconds after I did, and we exchanged wide-eyed glances of fear.
“We’ve got to get out of the city,” Jace said breathlessly. “Get to the mountains.”
I jumped up and threw on my boots. I tried to stay clear-headed so that we’d have a chance at survival. If we were being attacked, we’d need to move quickly and keep Team Hood together.
I couldn’t bear to lose any more team members.
But when we stepped outside of the tent, the fear of an attack melted away. Dozens of people were standing outside of their tents in the early dawn and watching as airships came down over the Brightbirch tarmac. It wasn’t an attack. Judging from the lack of airship fire and alarms in the city, this was an approved landing.
Someone was arriving.
Nelson was already out of her tent, walking over to J
ace and me.
“Who do you think would be showing up here?” I asked her. Had another base been attacked and evacuated? If so, were we even closer to being discovered than when we arrived?
“I have no idea,” she replied. “We might not even find out, with Nathan being as tight-lipped as he currently is.”
“It’s a small base,” Jace interjected. “He might not be able to hide it.”
I nodded slowly. That was true.
The rest of the team was exiting their tents now, including Cloyd. True to his word, he offered me a small smile when we made eye contact. I returned the favor. It might take a while to build a relationship with him, but it was apparent that we were both willing to try for Jace.
Suddenly Gabby stumbled out in a panic.
“Is everything okay?” she asked in a high-pitched voice, looking around madly at all of us. “I thought I heard airships.”
“Everything is fine,” I assured her. “If we were under attack, I doubt they’d start with the tarmac.”
Gabby exhaled, and I watched as the color returned to her face.
It looked like everyone was out of their tents at this point, anxiously watching the airships touch down in Brightbirch. But when I looked over and saw a lone tent out farther in the field behind us, I realized that not everyone was concerned.
Robert hadn’t even exited his tent. So many of us had run out of our tents in fear because we were constantly anticipating an attack. But not Robert. Was that because he knew there was nothing to worry about all along? After all, if he was the mole, he would know exactly when to expect an attack.
Jace followed my gaze.
“Haven’t seen much of that guy around,” he said. “Not that I miss him.”
“I wonder what he’s doing out there all by himself,” I replied.
“I agree with you, for the record,” Jace said. “He’s highly suspect. We should start with him when we begin our investigation.”
I nodded. We needed to start with Robert. And if I was right, we’d be ending our investigation with him, too.
The Child Thief 6: Zero Hour Page 10
