I sit opposite of her on a bar stool.
Eliza pours the fruity liquid into two glasses already waiting and raises an eyebrow. “It seems like going to the university was a good idea then?” She smiles. “I know it’s been rough, but the fact you’re actually practicing—willingly—is a great sign!”
She hands me one of the drinks and I take it from her. “Yeah, it’s shined a light on a lot of things I’ve stayed in the dark about.”
“Are you feeling okay? I know how hard you trained before, but using them again after so long may take a lot out of you. Has anything changed? Are your abilities still the same?”
“I feel great actually. I feel more energetic than I have in a long time. It’s like not using them was exhausting me more. Nothing has changed that I can tell. I can still manipulate thermal energy into blasts, use it to heighten my strength and to increase my speed.”
Eliza sits across from me. “That’s fantastic! I know I may be pushing my luck here, but … have you given any more thoughts about the Defender program?”
“Actually, I have.” I unexpectedly remember Dean Warwick and his mention of the program. “Oh! That reminds me, I ran into Stu.”
Her forehead wrinkles with worry. “Stu? As in …?”
I take a quick drink, the sweetness causing my taste buds to smile, and set it down. “Yes, your ex-boyfriend. He’s the dean, so it was bound to happen.”
She stares at her glass. “I know.”
I tilt my head, trying to get her attention. “He wanted me to tell you hi by the way.”
A smile tugs at her lips. “I’m sure he did.”
A twinge of guilt prods me. “I don’t want to pry, but what happened between you two? Was it because of me you guys broke up?”
Her eyes brighten with surprise. “What? Why would you think that? It wasn’t you. It was … well, you know about his ability, right?”
“Actually, no. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone mention it.”
“Well, it’s because he doesn’t like to talk about it. He doesn’t really use it that often.”
“Why is that?”
“He’s a mind reader. Literally. But to do so, he needs permission first.” She laughs. “And how many people do you think would give that?”
Oh, that makes sense. “Yeah, I wouldn’t. Why would anyone?”
She glances away, her cheeks burn bright red. “Well, I gave him permission. It seemed like a good idea at the time.”
My own face feels warmer than normal. “Oh.”
“Yeah, it didn’t seem like a big deal, but later on, it became a big problem. We had a bad argument, and I told him to stop doing it.” She rubs her forehead like she may have a headache. “That’s when he learned the person could also revoke permission.”
“He didn’t know that before?”
Eliza shakes her head. “No, I guess it never came up. It’s not like many people are willing to share their thoughts. Anyway, things just got complicated between us, and I accepted he wasn’t the one for me.”
“Well, it does make me feel a bit better that it wasn’t because of me, but I know almost no breakup is easy,” I say gently.
Eliza finishes her drink in a couple large gulps and sets down the glass harder than normal. “Yep.” She takes a deep breath. “Anyway, let’s move away from that subject and onto the Defender program! You really have thought about it?”
I twirl my glass between my hands, careful not to spill anything. “I have, but I don’t know if I really want to. I need to decide soon, because the deadline to apply for the test is approaching, if I want a shot at being accepted into it for the next fall semester that is.”
“Yeah, and only a select few can test like that. Even if you’re chosen and get in, you know you’ll have to do summer school, right? So you can graduate on time.”
I sigh. “Yeah, it’s a lot, but, if it’s what I want to do, I’m willing to take it on.”
“Maybe you should talk to someone to learn more. I really can’t help you, since I was never in the program. I just wanted to tutor and teach others about their abilities, to your mother’s disappointment.”
I laugh, but it comes out more as a huff. “Well, you’re a great ability trainer—I would know. That’s why mom was so heartbroken that you never wanted to work by her side.” Eliza smiles. “But I am friends with someone in the program, so I’m sure they would tell me about it if I asked.”
“You are? That’s great! I’m sure she would take the time to fill you in!”
“Yes. I’m sure he would.”
She smirks. “Oh, your friend is a guy?”
I purse my lips. “Yes.”
“Does this guy have a name?”
I shake my head. “Nope. He’s nameless. I call him N for short.”
Eliza’s face drops, annoyed by my sarcastic comment.
I roll my eyes. “His name is Aiden. He was actually the one with me when the whole incident with Iron Forge happened.”
“Oh, you did tell me about him when you called me. How is he? Did he heal okay?”
“Yeah. He says he barely has a scar from it, but it still shook me up a bit.” I hang my head low. Even though I know Aiden doesn’t hold anything against me, I still deal with tremendous guilt over what happened.
“So, how did you guys meet?”
I chuckle. “Funny story. He was a fan of Mom and Dad. A portrait of them hangs inside the student center, and we bumped into each other there.” The memory of how much he bothered me when we first met seems so comical. “Long story short, we had a couple of rough patches, but we’ve worked them out. He’s a pretty good friend.”
Eliza pours herself more punch and chuckles. “I really did get the short version of it, didn’t I?”
I nonchalantly shrug. “There’s not that much to tell.” More like I don’t feel like answering a hundred billion questions about him.
“Why do I get the feeling there’s a lot more to the story?”
I frown, acting like I don’t know what she’s implying. “Well, he’s pretty dedicated to his training. He actually won the YAC last summer, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he is at the top of his class. He doesn’t have much time to do anything else, but he’s helped me look at things differently.”
Eliza perks up. “Like what?”
Sadness claws my heart. “He told me Mom and Dad inspired him to become a Guardian, and I don’t know … actually letting someone tell me about how my parents influenced their life pulled me out of the fog I was in. I used their death as a crutch to avoid the world instead of trying to make it a better place like they wanted.”
Eliza’s eyes grow soft with empathy. “Honey, they were your parents. It was understandable.”
“I know, but they wouldn’t want me to be this way. Erik helped me realize that also.”
Eliza’s face drops in shock, like I just slapped her. “Wait! You’ve actually talked to Erik?”
I sniffle. Oh yeah, I didn’t tell her about that. Whoops. “Yeah, and we actually got things sorted out between us.” I recall something Erik told me. “So … he told me that he did come to see me, but you told him to skedaddle,” I say jokingly.
Eliza chortles but nods shamefully. “I did. I didn’t want to push you at the time. You were emotional and so mad at everyone. I doubted you would even let him near you.”
“You’re probably right, but it was nice to know that he did try.”
Eliza stares into space, getting lost in a memory. “Yeah. That day took a toll on him. He was a mess for a while. It didn’t help that Mad Marie decided to try to take over the city soon after, and he was the only one who could stop her.”
“Is she still in prison?”
“Oh, yeah. She’ll be there for life. There’s no way she will be released. It would cause chaos.”
Another two-ton pound bag of regrets drops on my shoulders. Erik really did have a lot on his plate. “Erik helped me see beyond my parents. I was so focused on their murders
, it never occurred to me that other people may have been in danger and needed his help. Erik made some hard choices, but, in the end … they were the right ones.”
“Yes. They were,” Eliza agrees softly.
We remain quiet for a moment. The memories of the past sit among us like ghosts, forever haunting, no matter how much we want to move past them. I know with time and my new outlook, things will get easier. It’s time for me to live in the present and appreciate those who are here for me now.
I regard Eliza with a warm smile. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever thanked you for stepping in to care for me like you did.”
She smiles back, her honey-colored eyes glimmer. “You never had to.”
“I know, but I don’t know what would’ve happened to me if you didn’t. So, thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Em. But really, no thanks are necessary. You know your mom was like a sister to me, and you mean the world to me. I would never let the system take you.” The corner of her eyes raises with excitement. “I’m so proud of you. You really have come a long way. I knew if you gave the university a chance, it would be a great opportunity for you.”
I go for my drink again; my throat feels dry. “Yeah, you were right.”
“So, does this mean …?”
I chuckle. “I’m going to register for classes for next semester.”
She rushes to me and swallows me in a hug before I can set down my drink. Some of the juice splashes onto the counter. “This is cause for celebrating!”
I laugh, but it comes out a bit muffled against Eliza’s chest.
She loosens her hold.
“Yeah, but I still need to figure out one thing,” I say, dampening the mood. “The Defender program.”
“What’s holding you back?”
I eye the tile floor. “I’m not sure.”
My parents’ bedroom door stares at me like the cover of a white casket. For eight years, I have avoided this room. Trembling, I reach for the doorknob, and, with a deep breath, I enter.
The room smells of lavender, and dust particles twirl in the sunlight over my parents’ bed. The copper reading light above it brings a smile to my face. So many nights I would lay here with my parents with just that light on. They would read countless fairytales and keep me safe from the monsters under my bed. I head to my mom’s side, nearest to the window. Books are piled high on top of her nightstand, and framed news articles hang on the wall above them. Some of the headlines read: New Guardian Couple Emerges, Digger Digs Again, Disguiser’s Biggest Fear: Emerald Blaze. I remove one of them off the wall and sit on the bed to read the story. It’s about the day Disguiser paraded himself as the mayor and tied up the real one in the closet. He tried to pass an order for Guardians to have a surprise holiday, requiring them to take the day off. This raised a lot of red flags. My mom had an inkling that it was Disguiser and busted into the mayor’s office. As soon as he saw her, Disguiser scurried out the window, since he’s deathly afraid of fire. Thankfully, my dad caught him in a dirt mound, and my mom dragged him off to prison.
Creak.
My head jolts in the direction of the door to see Eliza standing there, donning a sad smile. “You know, your mom wasn’t always sure about being a Guardian herself.”
I almost drop the article. “What?”
Eliza enters the room toward me. “She had her doubts while she was in the Defender program.”
My face feels numb. “She did?”
“Yeah. She wasn’t sure if she could handle the pressure and was close to dropping out.” Eliza sits next to me, and the mattress moves under me with the additional weight. “She was thinking about pursuing a different career.”
“Really? What other career could she have possibly wanted? She was born to be a Guardian!”
Eliza’s face becomes firm, unreadable. “You know, she didn’t say much about it, but I remember talking with her when she was debating. She was so passionate about wanting to help people and came to the realization on her own that she could do that best by being a Guardian.”
I put down the article and grab onto the edge of the bed for a sense of security. “It’s just everything seems to be changing so fast for me. It’s scary.”
Eliza pulls me into her side for reassurance. “It can be, but sometimes it can be refreshing.”
“True. Like, when I used my abilities again, it felt so natural. I didn’t realize how much I missed them.”
“Then what’s going on in that head of yours?”
I rest my head on her shoulder. “I just want to make sure it’s what I want, not what I think other people want me to do. After all the years of being adamant about not wanting anything to do with the Guardians, I need to make sure this is the right decision.”
She leans her head against mine. “Let me ask you this then. When do you feel the happiest?”
Last night with Aiden comes to mind, and I smile. “When I’m practicing, because I know I’m working toward protecting the people I love, and maybe I can make a difference in the world.”
Eliza holds me a little tighter. “Then I think you already have your answer.”
Chapter 22
Aiden
I’m in a familiar abandoned cityscape with weeds popping out of cracks in the sidewalk. A bloodcurdling scream pierces the silence—it’s Ember screaming at me to help her parents—but I don’t move a muscle. I stare at her, confused as to why she is here and what’s going on. She looks younger, maybe twelve? I notice movement next to me, and Digger crawls out the rubble with blood pouring from the gaping hole in his chest. His blood-red eyes stare at me, judging me for wanting his daughter. Two hands appear on the side of my arms and move snakelike onto my shoulders. Emerald Blaze whispers in my ear, “I made a choice … and you need to as well.”
I bolt up in my bed and grab my chest, scared I may be having a heart attack. I can’t catch my breath, and I’m sticky with sweat. I throw my blanket to the side and check the clock. The red numbers are a beacon in the darkness; it’s only three a.m. I’m not even safe in my sleep anymore from my guilty conscience. I haven’t had nightmares like this since I began my training. I really hope this isn’t a sign they’re coming back—but this time with a vengeance.
“Man, training was brutal this morning!” Billy sits on the red leather sofa next to the matching chair I am in. His skin instantly matches the color, but his black tank top and blue jeans remain the same. “I can’t wait to take it easy tonight. We should shoot some hoops or play that new co-op game that just came out. What do you say?”
I set my coffee cup on the black oval table and lean back with a yawn. “Uh … I have to go to the library to work on some homework,” I lie. “Speaking of hoops though, how’s Ian?”
Billy chuckles. “He’s good, but he’s driving Mom nuts because he keeps sneaking into my room. I mean, I can’t blame the kid when he has such a cooler older brother like myself.” Billy sips his coffee before setting it next to mine. “But don’t change the subject. Why is it all work and no fun with you nowadays? You’ve always worked hard, but at least you knew how to chill once in a while before we came to this school.”
“Well, you know how serious my education is to me.” I stare out the enormous window opposite from me behind the black sleek countertop where baristas are serving other students. It overlooks the lake, giving me a picture-perfect view. The orange leaves glow in the sunlight, reminding me of Ember’s abilities, specifically her aura.
“So, what? We have about an hour to hang here before our next class? Do you want to grab something to eat?”
“No, I’m good. I just need a little caffeine boost. Plus, the Coffee Bar doesn’t have the greatest food. They have just those bagel sandwiches that gets hard too fast.”
He chuckles. “Yeah. Their coffee is sure damn good though.”
“Well, I would hope the coffee would be good, since they have all those fancy espresso machines. Places with that kind of stuff are usually serious about their cof
fee.”
“Hey, Aiden,” a voice calls for me, one I wish I didn’t have to deal with. Carly heads my way, wearing a black sweater with a pink and black polka-dotted miniskirt. “You wanted me to find you after class. So, here I am.” She smiles provocatively. “Would you like to go somewhere a little more private?”
From my peripheral vision, I see Billy has a puzzled expression, probably because I failed to fill him in about what Ember told me last week. “Nope. We can stay right here.” I purse my lips. “I would just like to know why you’re telling people we’re dating.”
Carly remains smug. “I’ve never told anyone that, but we can make that a reality if you’d like.” She winks.
Never in my life did I think I would meet someone who annoys the living hell out of me. “Well, I heard from a reliable source that you did. Which seems crazy, considering you know for a fact I’ve never been interested in dating you.”
She rolls her eyes while crossing her arms. “Let me guess. That annoying Vulterra girl got her lava abilities or whatever in a bunch over a silly remark I made.”
A surge of fury rushes through me, and I impulsively stand. “First of all, you won’t talk about her like that! Secondly, you need to understand that I may respect you as a fellow classmate, but that is the extent of any relationship between us. So I would appreciate it if you would stop spreading lies about us!”
Billy rises and touches my arm. “Calm down, man. It’s okay.”
“I just don’t understand why this one here thinks it’s okay to make up stories like some grade schooler.”
Carly’s mouth trembles along with her magenta eyes. I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen her speechless.
Billy goes to her and rubs the side of her arm, as if he’s consoling her. “Carly, just leave Ember alone, okay? We don’t need to make things harder for us around here.”
She uncrosses her arms while recoiling. “Whatever, Billy.” She purposely bumps into him as she passes in a huff.
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