Much to her amazement, or perhaps because of the constant litany of prayers she was sending skyward, the clouds slowly began to lift. The light patter of rain didn’t disappear, but Ruby wasn’t scared of a little rain.
‘I can do this,’ she whispered under her breath as she strode toward the monstrous plane. She nodded to Ben, pleased that he’d been the one to clear her for take-off.
When she entered the giant aircraft, she groaned and realised she’d forgotten to check there was a cushion for her. She was tiny – it was no great secret that she was technically too small to be flying, given the ATA guidelines – and she had no hope of a successful flight if she was so far from the controls.
‘Excuse me,’ she called out, ‘I need someone to get me a cushion.’
Ben had already disappeared, but Ruby heard the laughter from the ground crew below and tried to stay calm as blood rushed to her face and anger pulsed through every inch of her.
‘Not comfy enough in there for you, luv?’ one of the guys called back.
She took a deep breath and prepared to climb out. ‘I’ll have you know . . .’ she started, then realised it didn’t matter. No one was interested in helping a stupid little woman, and no one was ever going to go back to the mess room for her, even for the first woman to pilot a bomber.
‘Fine, I’ll get one myself!’ she fumed. She could have tried rolling up her jacket or putting her bag behind her, but it was an important flight and she needed to be comfortable and safe. She clambered back out of the cockpit, but as she did so a figure appeared, running along the tarmac.
‘You looking for this?’ Lizzie called out, waving a cushion.
Ruby grinned in relief. ‘How did you know?’
‘I knew those arseholes wouldn’t get it for you,’ responded Lizzie with an almost faultless British twang. ‘And I wanted to wish you luck one last time.’ She gave Ruby
a big, warm hug. ‘You’re going to be amazing, Ruby. I can’t wait to hear all about the first flight.’
‘Thanks, Liz,’ Ruby murmured, hugging her back. Then, with Lizzie’s help, she climbed back up into her seat.
‘Go show them what girls can do!’ Lizzie hollered, then turned to the men gathered around. ‘And next time get the woman a damn cushion when she needs one. You’re acting as if you’ve never seen a woman fly a bomber before!’
With the cushion underneath her and her heart starting to thud, Ruby prepared the plane, flicking switches and checking the controls.
‘Contact!’ she yelled, before turning on the big engine.
The noise of the huge plane rumbled through her. As she taxied down the long runway, she whispered a prayer and felt her heart leap the moment the wheels left the ground. And just like that, she was flying, the first woman ever to ferry a four-engine bomber – a Halifax with a 98-foot wingspan at that!
‘I did it!’ she squealed. ‘I did it,’ she whispered this time, and settled in for the cross-country flight to Yorkshire. She knew her route, had maps to consult as she needed them, and the weather was still clearing. All she had to hope for were no rogue German planes, increasing visibility and a decent landing at the other end – although the Halifax was fully loaded, and she knew exactly which button to push if she needed to unleash her fury on a plane marked with a black swastika on its fuselage.
She was the first four-engine female bomber, and for the first time since she’d started flying she didn’t need to glance at the co-pilot seat beside her. She didn’t need Tom, she didn’t need an instructor to back her up, she just needed to trust in herself and her ability to get the job done. She listened to the blissful silence inside her own head. All this time, Tom’s voice had been in there, telling her what to do, talking her through every step. But now the only voice she could hear was her own.
CHAPTER TWELVE
HAMBLE AIRFIELD, HAMPSHIRE, ENGLAND,
JULY 1942
LIZZIE
‘Lizzie?’
Lizzie sniffed and quickly wiped her cheeks. She didn’t need May to see her like this, or anyone else for that matter.
‘What’s wrong? Do you need a moment?’ May asked.
She shook her head. ‘No, I’m fine, I just . . .’
May frowned and touched her shoulder. ‘Liz, what’s going on?’
Lizzie tried to speak, but her words choked in her throat and all that came out was a big sob.
‘Oh dear, Lizzie,’ May said, presenting her with a handkerchief and patting her shoulder.
‘I’m sorry, I just . . . I can’t seem to get my head straight today.’
‘I know how hard it must have been for you to accept my decision,’ said May, her voice soft.
‘It’s not that. I mean it is,’ Lizzie managed to say. ‘I’m actually happy for Ruby, honestly. She deserves that flight, and you and Montgomery were right about me. I was acting like the only thing that mattered was my personal success, instead of realising that everything we do is for the war effort. You’ve all lost so much, and it’s easy for me to pretend like this is just a big adventure.’
May smiled. ‘I can’t tell you how good it is to hear you say that, Lizzie. And I overheard some of what you said to Ruby earlier. I’m proud of you.’
‘All I ever wanted was to show my daddy that I was the son he never had, that I was as good as any man, that I could achieve what he’d achieved in the Great War,’ Lizzie shared. ‘It sounds shallow now, but it’s true.’
‘It’s all in the past, Lizzie,’ May said. ‘I’ll be proud to have you second up after Ruby if all goes well today. Heaven knows we have more Halifaxes to ferry than we have pilots.’
Lizzie exhaled in relief. When Jackson had dismissed her, she truly hadn’t known if she’d been dismissed from training altogether.
‘Anything you want me to do, I’m here for you,’ she said honestly. ‘And feel free to give me a good kick up the backside if I go back to the old version of me, okay?’
May laughed. ‘Roger that.’ She paused. ‘I actually came to tell you that I received word from the US ambassador today.’
‘What did he have to say?’
‘Exactly what Jackson told us. The First Lady’s visit is confirmed, and we’re to meet with her at White Waltham.’
‘That’s great,’ Lizzie said, although she was feeling nervous. She’d hoped to be telling Eleanor that she was the first bomber girl, and she hated to think she might have disappointed her. ‘I still can’t believe Montgomery didn’t tell me earlier, though.’
May said nothing for a second. ‘Lizzie . . . There’s something else you weren’t told, too.’ She met Lizzie’s eyes, her expression pained.
‘What? What is it?’ Lizzie demanded.
May cleared her throat. ‘The ambassador also said that . . .’ She hesitated. ‘That a women’s flying squadron has been established in your absence.’
Lizzie opened her mouth to reply, but nothing come out. Her skin went cold, her throat dry. It couldn’t be true. There must have been a mistake.
‘He said it was a plane-delivery service, but I don’t know any other details.’
‘The bastards,’ Lizzie swore, standing up and kicking at her chair. ‘The bloody bastards!’
She’d come here, she’d done what they’d asked of her, she’d brought her best pilots with her, and they’d gone and established a women’s flying squadron without consulting her or asking her to head it? Was this to punish her for something? Was Montgomery involved? Had he said she wasn’t capable? She began to shake. She could cope with Ruby getting the first flight; she could live with that. But this? It was unimaginable!
‘Can I offer you some words of advice before you do something impulsive?’ said May, reaching for her hands.
Lizzie just stared back, seething.
‘Use this information wisely, and demand to take over as head of the programme. Lord only knows you deserve it, and you’ve more than proven yourself to me now,’ May said. ‘But show them the Lizzie we all know you can be, the Lizz
ie I’ve just seen today. Don’t make contact with anyone in a state of anger or shock. I want you to carefully think this through. I want you to be the leader and pilot that I believe you can be.’
Lizzie could hardly breathe. Had she done this to herself? Had she been so caught up in her own ambitions that she’d lost the role that was supposed to be hers? ‘They’ve forgotten about me. They’ve actually forgotten all about me, haven’t they? And here I was thinking I was proving myself and waiting patiently to be called back.’ She gulped. ‘Either that or I’ve blown it.’
May folded her arms across her chest. ‘Well, remind them exactly who you are then, but do it the right way. They won’t forget you a second time. But watch your words.’
Lizzie clenched her hands into fists to stop them shaking. ‘Oh, I will, don’t you worry.’
‘Going back to the task at hand, though, I’ll need you to take a temporary back seat on the four-engine bombers over the next week or so – all of you, actually,’ May said. ‘It’s a logistical nightmare, but we’re in a hurry to get as many Spitfires as we can to Malta, and I’ll need all hands on deck.’
‘Including you?’
May nodded. ‘Including me. I’m actually looking forward to flying instead of being permanently buried in paperwork and training. This could be a game-changer for the war, and that means they need us to deliver every plane possible with every pilot at our disposal.’
‘Whatever you need, May, I’m here. You can count on me.’
‘Good,’ May replied. ‘We should fly out soon after the First Lady’s visit, depending on when the planes are ready.’
Lizzie looked down at her hands and fisted them when she still couldn’t stop them from shaking. ‘May, do you mind me asking how you got along with the pay disparity dispute?’ she asked, to take her mind off it. ‘Or will you be fighting that until you’re blue in the face?’
A slow, proud smile lit up May’s face. ‘Would you believe that I got it? They crumbled the moment I kicked up a fuss. It seems they weren’t prepared to face an angry woman with a female squadron behind her.’
‘Already? You got it already?’ Lizzie knew how efficient her English boss was, but this was impressive, all the same.
‘So long as they don’t go back on their word, yes.’
Lizzie stepped forward and gave her a big hug. ‘I hope you’re proud of yourself. You’ve achieved so much for so many women.’ May had gone into battle for every single female ATA pilot, to ensure they were paid fairly for the sacrifice and contribution they were making for their country, and she hoped they all knew how far she was willing to go for them.
‘It’s nothing,’ May said with a shrug. ‘Anyone else in my position would do the same.’
Lizzie shook her head, not surprised that May didn’t want a fuss. ‘Since I don’t have any flights today, would you mind if I took the next few hours off? I need to go to the post office to send a telegram.’
‘Of course. That’s fine,’ said May. ‘But promise me you’ll take some time before sending anything back home about the flying squadron?’
Lizzie grinned. ‘I’ll walk there, so it’ll give me time to think.’
‘Go then, and don’t be too hard on Montgomery when you see him. Perhaps he knows nothing about all this.’
Lizzie raised a brow. ‘I’m certain he does.’
Lizzie said goodbye to May and started to walk, pleased the sun was shining so she could wander and figure out exactly what she was going to say to General Hap Arnold about the flying squadron.
Lizzie looked skyward and sent up a prayer that Ruby was delivering the bomber safely. She put her head down and walked fast, grasping for words other than, ‘What the hell were you thinking, doing this without me?’ She doubted Hap would have a welcome party for her if she started out her telegram like that.
‘Lizzie!’
She turned to see Jackson Montgomery’s familiar outline jogging towards her from the administration building.
‘In case you’re wondering, I’ve made my apologies,’ she said, expecting him to launch straight into a lecture about her on-base behaviour. ‘Ruby knows that she has my full support, and so does May. They’re great women, it just took me a little longer to see that.’
‘It’s not that,’ he said. He looked different somehow; his eyes were soft, troubled even, and Lizzie folded her arms. Was he going to admit what was going on back home, or was he going to pretend he didn’t know anything? Right now she didn’t trust him as far as she could kick him, even if he had passed useful information to May.
‘Spit it out then,’ she said impatiently.
‘Elizabeth, I needed to see you before I leave base,’ he said, his brows furrowed. ‘And I need to talk to you about something.’
‘Leave base?’ she asked. Now she was furious – he had to have something to do with it!
He nodded. ‘I’ve been called home and I have a few days’ leave before I fly back.’
She frowned, still pretending she knew nothing. ‘Home? I thought you’d be kept here until you could fly again?’ Was he not returning to active duty?
‘Lizzie, I do hope we cross paths again, despite everything. I think under different circumstances we might have gotten along better.’
Lizzie gasped. ‘You’re going home to join this other woman pilot, aren’t you? I can’t believe it! Are you going to be running the programme with her?’
‘Lizzie, please, I . . .’
She turned away, wanting to scream that he was a spineless bastard, but managing to hold herself back.
‘Yes, I’ve been asked to go back and take over a training position, mainly of our new male pilots, but I could be overseeing the women’s flying detachment training too. I’m not going to lie to you.’
‘Just go, Jackson. Go!’ she snapped.
‘Lizzie, stop,’ he ordered. ‘You need to listen to me.’
She ignored him, and began to walk on. ‘I’ve heard enough!’ she called back.
But a heavy hand soon fell on her shoulder.
‘Get your hands off me!’ she exclaimed.
But Jackson’s hold stayed firm. ‘Lizzie, I was going to tell you about the new squadron. It’s one of the reasons I was looking for you, but it’s more than that. I need . . .’
‘What?’ she snapped. ‘What do you need?’
‘It’s your father,’ Jackson said. ‘I’m so sorry that I’m the one to break this news to you, Liz, but I wanted it to be me.’
Lizzie’s heart started to pound. ‘My father?’ What on earth did Jackson know about her father? ‘What are you talking about?’
‘He’s had a heart attack, Lizzie. I’m so sorry.’ He reached for her hand. ‘I was in the office when an urgent message came through for you from head office, and I wanted to be the one to break the news to you.’
Lizzie’s breath stuttered from her lungs. She felt her knees buckle as she stared back at Jackson, whose hand found her arm, this time holding her up. ‘Is he alive? How do you know? What . . .’
‘He’s alive. He’s in hospital. I’m so sorry – I know how much he means to you.’
Lizzie was struggling to take it in. He’d always seemed so strong, so invincible to her . . . but . . . a heart attack?
‘Thank you. For telling me,’ she managed.
‘Your father . . .’ he started.
‘You let me worry about my father,’ she said briskly. She raised a hand and took a step back. ‘Until our paths cross again.’
He nodded, a look passing over his face, an expression she couldn’t fathom. ‘Goodbye, Lizzie. And good luck.’
She watched him as he started to back away, wondering what was going on in his head. She waited, barely breathing, until he was out of sight, before collapsing to the concrete and sobbing like a child. She couldn’t lose her daddy, she couldn’t lose him while she was on the other side of the world! She needed him, she needed to show him what she’d done, how much she’d grown, what she was capable of. And m
ore than anything, she wanted to be the one to care for him and nurse him back to health.
‘Don’t you die on me, daddy,’ she whispered. ‘Don’t you dare go and leave me.’
Lizzie marched into the post office, breathing heavily after walking so far. But she’d had time to clear her head, and she knew exactly what she needed to say. She quickly composed a telegram to her mother, telling her she’d been informed of her father’s condition and would be coming home as soon as she could. And then she took a deep breath and composed the words she’d been reciting for the last half-mile of her walk, wanting to make sure the entire army knew she was ready and capable of stepping up to lead a team.
GENERAL HENRY ARNOLD.
I’VE BEEN INFORMED A WOMEN’S FERRY SERVICE HAS BEEN ESTABLISHED IN MY ABSENCE. I TRUST THAT I’M STILL EXPECTED TO HEAD ANY WOMEN’S SQUADRON TO ASSIST WITH THE WAR EFFORT. I AM READY TO TAKE ON A LEADERSHIP ROLE AND DO WHATEVER IS NEEDED OF ME. INFORMATION REQUESTED IMMEDIATELY ON WHEN I SHOULD RETURN. ENDS.
I’m coming, Daddy, she thought, sending a silent prayer skywards as she stepped out of the post office. Don’t you go dying without letting me say goodbye. I’ve got way too much to tell you before you go.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
RAF ELVINGTON AIRFIELD, YORKSHIRE,
JULY 1942
RUBY
Ruby pulled out her compact and quickly powdered her nose, wanting to look fresh on her arrival. She might want to be taken seriously as a pilot, but she was still a girl and she liked to look like one – and if Tom was there, she wanted to knock his socks off.
Next she took out her lipstick and reapplied it, pleased there were no other planes flying in formation with her or looking to her for guidance. She laughed to herself, thinking about the first time she’d led the way; she was known for her knack with maps and landmarks. One of the other pilots had flown up beside her, worried about all her zigzagging, only to see her applying her powder. Ruby had almost dropped it in fright, and all she’d been able to think of was how ridiculous she’d have looked if it had ended up all over the cockpit.
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