by T. S. Eliot
I’m afraid the law can’t touch them.
CHARLES. Then why should you submit?
Why not leave Badgley and escape from them?
LORD CLAVERTON. Because they are not real, Charles. They are merely ghosts:
Spectres from my past. They’ve always been with me
Though it was not till lately that I found the living persons
Whose ghosts tormented me, to be only human beings,
Malicious, petty, and I see myself emerging
From my spectral existence into something like reality.
MONICA. But what did the ghosts mean? All these years
You’ve kept them to yourself. Did Mother know of them?
LORD CLAVERTON. Your mother knew nothing about them. And I know
That I never knew your mother, as she never knew me.
I thought that she would never understand
Or that she would be jealous of the ghosts who haunted me.
And I’m still of that opinion. How open one’s heart
When one is sure of the wrong response?
How make a confession with no hope of absolution?
It was not her fault. We never understood each other.
And so we lived, with a deep silence between us,
And she died silently. She had nothing to say to me.
I think of your mother, when she lay dying:
Completely without interest in the life that lay behind her
And completely indifferent to whatever lay ahead of her.
MONICA. It is time to break the silence! Let us share your ghosts!
CHARLES. But these are only human beings, who can be dealt with.
MONICA. Or only ghosts, who can be exorcised!
Who are they, and what do they stand for in your life?
LORD CLAVERTON. … And yet they’ve both done better for themselves
In consequence of it all. He admitted as much,
Fred Culverwell …
MONICA. Fred Culverwell?
Who is Fred Culverwell?
LORD CLAVERTON. He no longer exists.
He’s Federico Gomez, the Central American,
A man who’s made a fortune by his own peculiar methods,
A man of great importance and the highest standing
In his adopted country. He even has sons
Following in their father’s footsteps
Who are also successful. What would he have been
If he hadn’t known me? Only a schoolmaster
In an obscure grammar school somewhere in the Midlands.
As for Maisie Batterson …
MONICA. Maisie Batterson?
Who is Maisie Batterson?
LORD CLAVERTON. She no longer exists.
Nor the musical comedy star, Maisie Montjoy.
There is Mrs. John Carghill, the wealthy widow.
But Freddy Culverwell and Maisie Batterson,
And Dick Ferry too, and Richard Ferry —
These are my ghosts. They were people with good in them,
People who might all have been very different
From Gomez, Mrs. Carghill and Lord Claverton.
Freddy admired me, when we were at Oxford;
What did I make of his admiration?
I led him to acquire tastes beyond his means:
So he became a forger. And so he served his term.
Was I responsible for that weakness in him?
Yes, I was.
How easily we ignore the fact that those who admire us
Will imitate our vices as well as our virtues —
Or whatever the qualities for which they did admire us!
And that again may nourish the faults that they were born with.
And Maisie loved me, with whatever capacity
For loving she had — self-centred and foolish —
But we should respect love always when we meet it;
Even when it’s vain and selfish, we must not abuse it.
That is where I failed. And the memory frets me.
CHARLES. But all the same, these two people mustn’t persecute you.
We can’t allow that. What hold have they upon you?
LORD CLAVERTON. Only the hold of those who know
Something discreditable, dishonourable …
MONICA. Then, Father, you should tell us what they already know.
Why should you wish to conceal from those who love you
What is known so well to those who hate you?
LORD CLAVERTON. I will tell you very briefly
And simply. As for Frederick Culverwell,
He re-enters my life to make himself a reminder
Of one occasion the memory of which
He knows very well, has always haunted me.
I was driving back to Oxford. We had two girls with us.
It was late at night. A secondary road.
I ran over an old man lying in the road
And I did not stop. Then another man ran over him.
A lorry driver. He stopped and was arrested,
But was later discharged. It was definitely shown
That the old man had died a natural death
And had been run over after he was dead.
It was only a corpse that we had run over
So neither of us killed him. But I didn’t stop.
And all my life I have heard, from time to time,
When I least expected, between waking and sleeping,
A voice that whispered, ‘you didn’t stop!’
I knew the voice: it was Fred Culverwell’s.
MONICA. Poor Father! All your life! And no one to share it with;
I never knew how lonely you were
Or why you were lonely.
CHARLES. And Mrs. Carghill:
What has she against you?
LORD CLAVERTON. I was her first lover.
I would have married her — but my father prevented that:
Made it worth while for her not to marry me —
That was his way of putting it — and of course
Made it worth while for me not to marry her.
In fact, we were wholly unsuited to each other.
Yet she had a peculiar physical attraction
Which no other woman has had. And she knows it.
And she knows that the ghost of the man I was
Still clings to the ghost of the woman who was Maisie.
We should have been poor, we should certainly have quarrelled,
We should have been unhappy, might have come to divorce;
But she hasn’t forgotten or forgiven me.
CHARLES. This man, and this woman, who are so vindictive:
Don’t you see that they were as much at fault as you
And that they know it? That’s why they are inspired
With revenge — it’s their means of self-justification.
Let them tell their versions of their miserable stories.
Confide them in whispers. They cannot harm you.
LORD CLAVERTON. Your reasoning’s sound enough. But it’s irrelevant.
Each of them remembers an occasion
On which I ran away. Very well.
I shan’t run away now — run away from them.
It is through this meeting that I shall at last escape them.
— I’ve made my confession to you, Monica:
That is the first step taken towards my freedom,
And perhaps the most important. I know what you think.
You think that I suffer from a morbid conscience,
From brooding over faults I might well have forgotten.
You think that I’m sickening, when I’m just recovering!
It’s hard to make other people realise
The magnitude of things that appear to them petty;
It’s harder to confess the sin that no one believes in
Than the crime that everyone can appreciate.
For the crime is in relation to the law
And the sin
is in relation to the sinner.
What has made the difference in the last five minutes
Is not the heinousness of my misdeeds
But the fact of my confession. And to you, Monica,
To you, of all people.
CHARLES. I grant you all that.
But what do you propose? How long. Lord Claverton,
Will you stay here and endure this persecution?
LORD CLAVERTON. To the end. The place and time of liberation
Are, I think, determined. Let us say no more about it.
Meanwhile, I feel sure they are conspiring against me.
I see Mrs. Carghill coming.
MONICA. Let us go.
LORD CLAVERTON. We will stay here. Let her join us.
[Enter MRS. CARGHILL]
MRS. CARGHILL. I’ve been hunting high and low for you, Richard!
I’ve some very exciting news for you!
But I suspect … Dare I? Yes, I’m sure of it, Monica!
I can tell by the change in your expression to-day;
This must be your fiancé. Do introduce him.
MONICA. Mr. Charles Hemington. Mrs. Carghill.
CHARLES. How do you do.
MRS. CARGHILL. What a charming name!
CHARLES. I’m glad my name meets with your approval, Mrs. Carghill.
MRS. CARGHILL. And let me congratulate you‚ Mr. Hemington.
You’re a very lucky man, to get a girl like Monica.
I take a great interest in her future.
Fancy! I’ve only known her two days!
But I feel like a mother to her already.
You may say that I just missed being her mother!
I’ve known her father for a very long time,
And there was a moment when I almost married him,
Oh so long ago. So you see, Mr. Hemington,
I’ve come to regard her as my adopted daughter.
So much so, that it seems odd to call you Mr. Hemington:
I’m going to call you Charles!
CHARLES. As you please, Mrs. Carghill.
LORD CLAVERTON. You said you had some exciting news for us.
Would you care to impart it?
MRS. CARGHILL. It’s about dear Michael.
LORD CLAVERTON. Oh? What about Michael?
MRS. CARGHILL. He’s told me all his story.
You’ve cruelly misunderstood him, Richard.
How he must have suffered! So I put on my thinking cap.
I know you’ve always thought me utterly brainless,
But I have an idea or two, now and then.
And in the end I discovered what Michael really wanted
For making a new start. He wants to go abroad!
And find his own way in the world. That’s very natural.
So I thought, why not appeal to Señor Gomez?
He’s a wealthy man, and very important
In his own country. And a friend of Michael’s father!
And I found him only too ready to help.
LORD CLAVERTON. And what was Señor Gomez able to suggest?
MRS. CARGHILL. Ah! That’s the surprise for which I’ve come to prepare you.
Dear Michael is so happy — all his problems are solved;
And he was so perplexed, poor lamb. Let’s all rejoice together.
[Enter GOMEZ and MICHAEL]
LORD CLAVERTON. Well, Michael, you know I expected you this morning,
But you never came.
MICHAEL. No, Father. I’ll explain why.
LORD CLAVERTON. And I learn that you have discussed your problems
With Mrs. Carghill and then with Señor Gomez.
MICHAEL. When I spoke, Father, of my wish to get abroad.
You couldn’t see my point of view. What’s the use of chasing
Half round the world, for the same sort of job
You got me here in London? With another Sir Alfred
Who’d constitute himself custodian of my morals
And send you back reports. Some sort of place
Where everyone would sneer at the fellow from London,
The limey remittance man for whom a job was made.
No! I want to go where I can make my own way,
Not merely be your son. That’s what Señor Gomez sees.
He understands my point of view, if you don’t.
And he’s offered me a job which is just what I wanted.
LORD CLAVERTON. Yes, I see the advantage of a job created for you
By Señor Gomez …
MICHAEL. It’s not created for me.
Señor Gomez came to London to find a man to fill it,
And he thinks I’m just the man.
GOMEZ. Yes, wasn’t it extraordinary.
LORD CLAVERTON. Of course you’re just the man that Señor Gomez wants,
But in a different sense, and for different reasons
From what you think. Let me tell you about Gomez.
He’s unlikely to try to be custodian of your morals;
His real name is Culverwell …
GOMEZ. My dear Dick,
You’re wasting your time, rehearsing ancient history.
Michael knows it already. I’ve told him myself.
I thought he’d better learn the facts from me
Before he heard your distorted version.
But, Dick, I was nettled by that insinuation
About my not being custodian of Michael’s morals.
That is just what I should be! And most appropriate,
Isn’t it, Dick, when we recall
That you were once custodian of my morals:
Though of course you went a little faster than I did.
LORD CLAVERTON. On that point, Fred, you’re wasting your time:
My daughter and my future son-in-law
Understand that allusion. I have told them the story
In explanation of our … intimacy
Which they found puzzling.
MRS. CARGHILL. Oh,Richard!
Have you explained to them our intimacy too?
LORD CLAVERTON. I have indeed.
MRS. CARGHILL. The romance of my life.
Your father was simply irresistible
In those days. I melted the first time he looked at me!
Some day, Monica, I’ll tell you all about it.
MONICA. I am satisfied with what I know already, Mrs. Carghill,
About you.
MRS. CARGHILL. But I was very lovely then.
GOMEZ. We are sure of that! You’re so lovely now
That we can well imagine you at … what age were you?
MRS. CARGHILL. Just eighteen.
LORD CLAVERTON. Now, Michael,
Señior Gomez says he has told you his story.
Did he include the fact that he served a term in prison?
MICHAEL. He told me everything. It was his experience
With you, that made him so understanding
Of my predicament.
LORD CLAVERTON. And made him invent
The position which he’d come to find the man for.
MICHAEL. I don’t care about that. He’s offered me the job
With a jolly good screw, and some pickings in commissions.
He’s made a fortune there. San Marco for me!
LORD CLAVERTON. And what are your duties to be? Do you know?
MICHAEL. We didn’t go into details. There’s time for that later.
GOMEZ. Much better to wait until we get there.
The nature of business in San Marco
Is easier explained in San Marco than in England.
LORD CLAVERTON. Perhaps you intend to change your name to Gomez?
GOMEZ. Oh no, Dick, there are plenty of other good names.
MONICA. Michael, Michael, you can’t abandon your family
And your very self — it’s a kind of suicide.
