I was the only one standing. I’d stood long ago when the rising tide of frustration and fear had pulled me off my seat like a wave crashing to shore. I still felt it swelling within me – that never-ending cascade of nerves growing stronger and stronger like a fire gorging itself on oxygen. “The Star Forces aren’t going to wait around to let us leave,” I said through an exasperated sigh, “leaving in 12 hours isn’t good enough. I guarantee you they will have ships here before then.”
Maybe it was the exact shifting tone behind my words, or maybe it was the look plastered across my creased and pale face – but everybody fell silent. And the silence was edgy, as if it jittered in place like a shivering man.
“I am inclined to agree that if we can leave sooner, we must,” the Captain said.
“But it’s going to take time to abandon this base. We can’t leave all these resources behind. We sacrificed too much to obtain them,” Lady Argoza countered immediately, her tone pleading but still firm with resolve.
I stood there and gritted my teeth. “Our lives are worth more than these resources, Lady. Without them, there will be no rebellion. If we have to start all over again, so be it. But if we lose our lives, if we lose the Ra’xon, and… all those aboard…” I stumbled over my words, pushing away the one thought that came to mind whenever I considered what was at stake. Alyssa.
The Captain put up a hand, spreading her stiff fingers wide. “We understand the stakes, Lieutenant Commander. As I said, I concur. I believe that our immediate departure is far more important than stripping this base of everything we can. And I fear you are right. The Star Forces will be on their way. We now have something they want.”
It happened – as soon as the Captain said that simple phrase, I stiffened. From my toes to the tip of my head, every muscle locked in place like mag clamps docking a heavy cruiser.
It had only been a day and a half, but every passing second, every goddamn passing second I thought of her and what she meant.
“We still need to discuss what we will do with her,” the Lady Argoza suddenly said.
“That is not a discussion for us,” the Captain replied immediately. “Alyssa Nightingale’s fate will affect the future of the resistance. It is not up to us to decide what will happen next. We must bring this information and Alyssa to the ruling council.”
I couldn’t speak. I didn’t want to. I couldn’t even make sense of the sudden rush of anger that slammed into the center of my chest and felt like it would tear through my very ribcage.
Slowly one hand curled into a fist.
J’lax saw it. In fact his head twitched towards me like a cat activated by movement. I watched a snarl pull its way over his lips. “Don’t even bother, fly boy – no one cares what you think.”
I ignored him. I looked straight past at the Captain and Argoza. “Doesn’t Jenks get a say? I mean, Alyssa,” I said through clenched teeth.
The Captain was the only person who could hold my gaze, but I fancied even for her it was hard. She would have far more experience in delivering uncomfortable news. Lady Argoza simply looked away.
“She is a risk,” the Captain said flatly. “A weapon. We need to treat her like one.”
My mouth jerked opened with such speed it was a surprise I didn’t shatter my jaw and send scraps of bone tumbling across the table.
She put up a hand immediately, the move so quick it reminded me of the inherent power in her form. “But we will still treat her like a person. We are not the Alliance,” she said every word slowly, haltingly, as if she were giving me the time I needed to understand each in turn. She also stared at me directly, her head slightly angled down until her ocular ridges cast her eyes into shadow. “We will consult with Alyssa. We will try to help her. But for now we must prioritize keeping her away from the Alliance. We must also take her to our primary scientific facility. Like it or not, Lieutenant Commander, she could hold the key to undermining the Alliance. Plus, for all we know, she is just the beginning of a new kind of soldier. You saw what she could do,” the Captain paused for a few seconds as she held my gaze with all the force of 1000 hands, “and you know we can’t allow that kind of power to go unchecked.”
If it were anyone else telling me this, I would dismiss them.
The Captain pulled it off, though, with her sheer sense of command.
Still, the anger burnt within me. The anger that I couldn’t do more, that I’d been thrust into this situation in the first place, and worse, that Alyssa had, too.
I couldn’t get that smile out of my head. It felt like somebody had carved it into my grey matter, driving it as deep into my brain as they could. That laugh too – that light, melodious, funny laugh. It was echoing in my ears, and there wasn’t a goddamn thing I could do to push it away.
“Nathan, we will do everything we can for her. And the resistance is doing everything they can to clear this base so we can escape soon.”
It took me a long time to slowly swivel my gaze towards Argoza, even longer to twist my stiff neck until I faced her in full. “Soon won’t be soon enough.”
Chapter 2
Alyssa Nightingale
In my brief moments of lucidity I started to realize where I was. The medical bay aboard the Ra’xon. I was being held behind category 10 shields.
Like a monster. Like a dangerous, unpredictable specimen they expected to wipe out the ship.
But then he would come along. Briefly. And he’d always smile down at me. Though my eyesight was bleary, and I could barely pay attention to any of the details around me, I recognized the smiles, if only for how they made me feel.
Then I’d slip back into the paranoia that had engulfed my heart. The fear at what would come next.
The resistance had me now, and my future would be dictated by their fears. If they were too scared of what I could do, they would kill me. They would be far too fearful that if I fell into the Alliances’ hands I would become a super weapon. And yet they would know that they couldn’t hold me themselves. Without a continuous escalating supply of compound 78, I would become a liability. One that could tear the ship apart.
So it was only logical to assume that they would come to that decision. That they would decide to execute me.
… I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. Would it be liberating to be torn from this curse of a life?
… No. I didn’t want to die. Of that I was sure. And yet I couldn’t see how my life could turn out differently. Even if the resistance decided not to kill me, there was every chance the Alliance would capture me once more.
Then… then I’d be virtually dead anyway. They’d find another way to crush my soul, until I was nothing but a faint shadow of a mind operating their telekinetic weapon.
I saw another shadow above me, or was it to my left?
It seemed far away yet close at the same time as my brain tried desperately to resolve the shadows and light swirling around me.
Then I saw it. That smile. Slowly shifting across his face. “We’re doing everything we can, Alyssa. You’ll be fine. You’ll be fine,” he repeated.
I held onto his words as I slipped back into a restless sleep.
…
Lieutenant Commander Nathan Shepherd
I didn’t know what I was doing here.
She was drugged. Sure, occasionally she thrashed about on her bed, but all her readings showed that she was unconscious save for a few precious spikes of awareness.
I took a step back from the massive intense flickering field that separated her from the rest of the med bay. I brought a hand up and let my fingers drop across my lips and down my sweaty chin. I let my hand fall until it banged into the side of my thigh. Then I made a fist and struck my leg once more.
I locked my eyes on her and didn’t turn away. Didn’t blink. Didn’t want to. I didn’t want to move either. I wanted to stay here until everything made sense. Or, better than that, everything went back to normal. As terrible as it sounded, I almost wished that I could dial the clock back a
nd just forget everything I’d learnt. Forget about the resistance, forget about the atrocities the Alliance had committed – wipe it all away and just return to commanding the Godspeed. I can’t say I’d been happy back then, but I’d been a hell of a lot happier than now.
“You’re a good man,” someone suddenly said from behind me.
I stiffened, turning, confusion crumpling my brow.
Then I saw Williams. She was on a bed over to the left. Somehow I’d walked right past her.
Maybe surprise registered clearly over my face, because she laughed. “You didn’t see me here, did you? Only have eyes for Alyssa, ha?” Though her tone was playful, her gaze was direct.
I swallowed. Then I smiled. “How are you holding up?” I let my gaze flick across her form. She’d had extensive skin and muscle grafts over the left side of her body. Apparently when she’d been brought in, she’d been a sight.
F’val, the monster, had practically killed her. All with his mind. All without technically lifting a finger.
I curled a hand into a fist, driving my fingers as hard into my palm as I could, feeling the tension refer all the way up into my shoulder and neck.
Williams glanced at my fist then back at my face. “It’s okay, Nathan,” her tone dropped low, so low I could barely hear it, “you don’t have to feel sorry for me.”
“Sorry? I don’t feel sorry,” I said, voice shaking with barely suppressed anger, “I feel… I feel… there was nothing I could do,” my voice suddenly cracked. “Not a goddamn thing. F’val was too quick, too strong, too—”
She put up a hand, her good hand – her other arm was still out of action as new nerve endings were regrown. “It’s okay,” she closed her eyes, “I understand.”
… She did, didn’t she? Because even though she was a telekinetic warrior just like F’val, he’d been far too powerful. She’d never had a chance.
I stood there, stiff as a plank of wood until finally she opened her eyes. I expected her to cry, or at least shed a tear or two at what had happened to her, but she didn’t. Instead there was a quiet restful surrender about her. It didn’t comfort me. Just made me feel sick.
I curled my other hand into a fist.
Again she glanced at it. “Nathan, don’t dwell on it. Just let it remind you why we’re doing this.” Williams stopped looking at me and instead let her gaze drift past until it locked on the category 10 force field keeping Alyssa in place.
A chill raced down my back, leaving every hair, no matter how small, standing on end. Slowly, agonizingly slowly, I turned to face Alyssa once more.
“What do you think they’ll do with her?” Williams suddenly asked.
I wish I knew. I couldn’t stop myself from speculating, though. While I hadn’t met the rest of the resistance, I doubted they were any more organized than the small faction here. And while I knew intrinsically I could trust the Captain, who knew how the rest of the resistance would conduct themselves? If they were scared enough, if they were stupid enough… they’d kill her, wouldn’t they? They’d deem Alyssa Nightingale too risky, and they’d execute her.
Maybe Williams knew what I was thinking because she let out a sudden hiss of a breath. “You need to have more faith, Nathan. That’s the one thing they try to destroy in the Alliance, but the one thing you need to reclaim if you want the resistance to succeed.”
It wasn’t her words so much as the way she said them. The soft certainty. It caught my attention and pulled my head around until I was staring at her once more.
She slowly let her gaze drift towards me. She didn’t say anything, not for a few long seconds. “Thank you,” she finally managed.
My brow compressed so hard over my eyes it was a surprise I could see. “What? What on earth are you thanking me for? I’ve done nothing—”
She put up her good hand once more. “You’re here, Nathan, and that’s all that matters. I know you can make a difference.”
I curled a hand into a fist once more, this one harder, tighter, my fingers practically piercing into the flesh. “Stop saying that,” I said through clenched teeth, “there’s nothing I can do. I’m not a telekinetic warrior, and I don’t have the scientific and technical prowess to understand what you are. There’s nothing I can bring to the resistance, and there’s nothing I can do to stop…” I turned and faced Alyssa once more, the words drying up in my throat.
“Give yourself time. Sometimes the people who make the most difference aren’t the most powerful; they’re the ones who sit tight and wait for the right opportunity.”
I wanted to dismiss her words, but couldn’t. I even felt a small smile creep across my face. “Since when did you become an optimist?”
She let out a soft laugh. “Since I found something worth dying for,” she answered directly.
I swallowed. Slowly. Drawing in a deep breath through my nostrils as I did. I watched Williams, and she held my gaze.
“I don’t care what the odds are, Nathan – I only care that we’re doing the right thing. And we are.”
I found myself nodding.
Suddenly my comm PIP crackled. It was such an unexpected noise that I jolted with surprise. “Shepherd here?” I managed, trying to quell my suddenly thumping heart.
“Come to the bridge,” the Captain said, “now.”
“On my way.” I turned sharply, heading for the door. Before I reached it, I turned back to Williams briefly.
She was watching me intently. “I don’t think you’re a god, I don’t think you’re a golden boy, I don’t think you’re the most incredible recruit the Star Forces ever produced. But I think you’re a good man, one who looks for the right opportunities and knows when to act. And Shepherd, that’s all that matters.”
I felt emotion shift through me, washing up my cheeks and over my brow, lifting my forehead towards my hairline. Then I forced myself to take a step back, and another, and I turned, shoes squeaking on the polished floor.
I headed to the bridge.
Even before I reached it, I knew something was happening. I passed a few stiff-lipped ensigns in the corridors, their expressions grim.
There it was again – that flare of fear in my gut. It felt as if I’d swallowed a flame, one that hadn’t been extinguished by my throat and had bypassed every attempt to suppress it.
By the time I finally reached the bridge, my heartbeat had doubled.
As soon as the doors opened in front of me, I saw the Captain standing, her stiff back to me as her head angled towards the floating view screen. “We’ve got multiple targets entering the system,” she said.
I shivered. A quick hard move that shifted down my back and shook all the way through my legs. I still pushed forward though. “What do we do? What kind of targets?”
“Long-range attack vessels. Nothing the Ra’xon can’t handle, but I fear that’s not their target.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve seen this attack pattern before.” The Captain did not turn to me, and instead kept her shifting gaze locked on the floating view screen. Battle and sensor data appeared in a constant stream down the left-hand side. Though it would be gobbledygook to most recruits, the Captain would understand it perfectly. And it did not bode well.
I took a stiff breath and waited for her command.
“I’ve seen this kind of attack formation before,” the Captain repeated. She pointed a stiff finger at the blips of sensor data on the view screen before her. “Those ships are going to land and attempt to take this base by force. If they do it quickly enough, they’ll be able to stop the Ra’xon from taking off.”
I didn’t ask the obvious question. Why bother landing when they could just bombard the base from the atmosphere?
The answer was: they wouldn’t dare. Because there was something on this ship they wanted, wasn’t there?
Alyssa.
If I’d had any doubt that the Alliance would do anything to get her back before, this washed away that doubt completely.
“We nee
d to mount a ground offence,” I said automatically.
“Yes,” the Captain agreed, “that’s why you’re here. You’re going to direct it. I don’t know what kinds of soldiers the Alliance is sending, but you need to be prepared.” Finally she turned to me. It was a stiff quick move, her head jerking to the side as her gaze locked on me. “You need to buy the Ra’xon the time to lift off. While we’re still in transport range, we’ll beam you out. But you need to give us that window of opportunity to reach the atmosphere. We’ll be vulnerable while we’re taking off. This ship wasn’t designed to land, after all.”
I nodded, mind still whirling through the possibilities. A land attack on a planet like this was a nightmare. Not only was the damn thing half desert and half ice, but this base was a warren. I’d also not had the opportunity to explore it completely. I didn’t know all the positions that would offer optimal defense. I’d barely been out of the Ra’xon and the hangar bay.
“Work with the resistance security,” the Captain commanded, “take the resources you need. I can’t give you everyone, though. We have to speed up repairs. The Chief has got every able body working on engineering. It will be a close call,” she said, voice dipping low.
I felt a shiver cross down my spine. It was so strong and so fast it could have shattered every bone in my back. I clenched my jaw and forced myself to nod. “How long until they arrive?”
“The computer’s current estimate is 30 minutes. The resistance has already deployed security satellites into space, and they will offer some flack. But you need to prepare, and you need to prepare now.”
I took a snapped step back and nodded my head. Then I turned hard on my foot, my boots squeaking as I shifted my weight and pushed forward. I practically threw myself at the electronic doors that separated the bridge from the hall beyond.
The Crucible- The Complete Series Page 31
