by Bella King
As old and poorly built as this housing unit was, it was still a nice escape from everything else in life. My roommates were relatively chill, and even when they were arguing about food or how many nights a month you were allowed to have guys over, everyone liked each other. There was good energy at home that I didn’t have when I lived with my parents.
My parents were poor, but I found it mostly to be the fault of my dad, who left and came back on a number of occasions. It was tough to have a good relationship with him, so I gave up as I got older. Why bother with someone that doesn’t care?
I got used to living poor, but I didn’t want my entire life to be like that. I was serious about finishing my education and getting a proper job, even if that meant navigating the strict system at Lakeshaw Academy and avoiding people like Jacob. It was too easy to get pulled into the drama, and I wanted to avoid that.
I climbed onto my bed, using the bunk below it as a step instead of the ladder that attached to the foot of the bed. It was easier to spring up from the side than to circle around and climb. It was more fun too, which was the real reason I always did it this way.
I rolled onto my mattress, just two feet away from the lumpy ceiling. I didn’t even have enough room to stand, but I liked being close to the ceiling. If I was claustrophobic, this would have been an issue, but I felt safe in confined spaces. Other people couldn’t navigate them the same way I could.
I closed my eyes, letting the stress of the day melt off my body and slide over the sides of the mattress, dripping off onto the floor and dissolving into the ground like fresh rain on loose soil. I must have fallen asleep because I was awoken by a hand reaching up onto the bed and squeezing my wrist.
My eyes popped open, and I jerked my hand away. “What?” I asked, my voice croaking in irritation.
“Dinner’s ready goofball,” I heard Mary’s voice say.
My limp hand gave her a thumbs up and fell back to the mattress. I didn’t want to get up, but I remembered how hungry I was and mustered the strength to roll off the bed and jump to the floor. This was my maneuver for leaving the bed in the morning. One day I would break my legs doing it, but not today.
I landed with a dull thud on the carpet below me. They had installed blue and gray speckled carpet in every room but failed to nail it down properly. It had creases and bumps from where I landed every morning, causing the carpet to ride up from under the bunk bed. We would have to lift the bed and put it back in place soon.
I rubbed my eyes and yawned as I floundered into the kitchen for dinner.
“Good morning sunshine,” Sarah said, waving a fork at me. “You should help with dinner next time.”
I rolled my eyes. “I suck at cooking,” I replied, slumping down into my seat.
Mary came around with a hot bowl of vegetable jambalaya, something easy to make that didn’t cost very much money. It was similar to soup with rice in it. I wasn’t entirely sure that wasn’t all it was.
Mary scooped a ladle full of steaming food into my bowl, splashing little dots of liquid in the surrounding area as she plopped it in. She went to Sarah, giving her a heaping ladle of jambalaya before serving herself. Mary was like a mother to us, being a year older and handling a lot of the organizational stuff around our home.
I realized early on that there was an advanced level of self-organization among the students. Power structures and hierarchy were reestablished every time a new student arrived. You either sunk to the bottom of the stack or worked your way up to be among Jacob’s ranks.
I was too new to have a well-defined place at Lakeshaw Academy, but I wasn’t terribly high. The only way to get to a high position was to be violent, manipulative, or date someone who was. None of those seemed like things I wanted to do to justify a good position.
Mary was much taller than I was and had knocked out a ditsy girl for being annoying in her first year. Most people didn’t mess with her because of that, plus, the guys left her alone because she was plainer than many of the other women there.
I thought she was lovely in her own way, but she didn’t seem to give a shit about that. She just wanted to get out of this place like everyone else.
Sarah was a sweetheart most of the time, but had some serious baggage from abuse, and could be found crying in the bathroom at various times during the day. I left her alone about it because I knew she didn’t like people intervening in her personal business. I would have helped if I could, but I wasn’t close enough to her to do anything.
Everyone at Lakeshaw had their problems, but thankfully I wasn’t too fucked up. I had sticky fingers and a bad attitude, but I was alright other than those two things. I was smart, and I could take care of myself. I just wanted to lay low.
I took a bite of my food, holding it on my tongue and blowing stream out through my clenched teeth to cool it off. I half-chewed it until it was cool enough to swallow.
“So, has Jacob approached you yet?” Sarah asked, taking a bite of her scalding food without flinching. That woman had no nerve endings in her mouth or something.
I shook my head. “Not yet.”
“You’re lucky, for now. I had to deal with him last year, and I swear to god that man will snap on the drop of a dime. I ended up giving him a few cartons of cigs to get him off my back, though he hasn’t bothered me since,” Sarah said, scooping more hot food into her mouth.
Ah yes, cigarettes, the prison currency. We weren’t in prison, but we were only given food stamps to buy our meals with, so cigarettes were only available to students that traded for them. They always got smuggled in, but they were difficult to get.
I assumed Sarah had some outside connections, but she never talked about them. You had to be secretive about everything you did, or the administration would clamp down on you hard. Don’t fucking step out of line at Lakeshaw Academy.
I sighed. “Isn’t there any way to fight back against Jacob and his goons?”
Mary cackled from her seat, rocking back and forth as though I had just told the funniest joke in the world to her. “Girl, you’re going to get yourself killed with that kind of thinking.”
I frowned. “Why? There’s only like ten of them, right? We couldn’t start our own group?”
Mary grew serious, shaking her head. “You need to promise me that you’re not going to get wrapped up in Jacob’s bullshit. That’s not for you, small little thing that you are. They would eat you alive.”
“I’m not small,” I said defensively, but I knew that I was. It had advantages, but I also got picked on sometimes for it.
“All I’m saying,” Mary said, waving a fork at me, “Is that the moment you defy Jacob he’s going to send everyone he has after you, and if that doesn’t work,” she paused dramatically, letting the air in the room sink, “Then he’ll come for you himself.”
Sarah nodded, backing up Mary. “You don’t want that, Elise.”
I groaned. “So, what am I supposed to do? I’m not going to sit around and wait for him to bully me as he does to everyone else.”
Mary shrugged. “Give him something. I don’t know. Or start dating one of his gang. Some of them are pretty cute.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t fraternize with the enemy.”
Sarah chuckled. “I have to agree. Fucking with those losers will only lead to more misery. Just try your best to stay away. Pay your taxes when you have to but stay away.”
It was fucked up that dealing with Jacob was just ‘paying tax’ to everyone. I had a very hard time letting someone walk over me like that and staying quiet. I would get revenge or find dirt on Jacob before he could even get to me. I would destroy him before he destroyed me.
I kept my lips sealed about that after dinner, though. Sarah and Mary didn’t agree with my way of dealing with cocky assholes like Jacob. Even Mary, someone who could probably arrange for some unpleasant things to happen to those guys, wouldn’t touch them.
I was crazy to go against that kind of power, but I wanted to try. If it came to be too
much to fight against, I would go back to traveling with the current like everyone else. The problem was that I wasn’t like everyone else.
I shoveled the rest of my food in my mouth and swallowed it without chewing. I just wanted to get to go back to sleep at this point. I had experienced enough excitement for one day.
I thanked Mary for the food and advice and promised her that I would help make dinner next time. I didn’t want her to think I was freeloading, even though I kind of was. Mary seemed to think I was cute and innocent enough to get away with it, but I didn’t want to take advantage of her kindness. If she felt like I was doing that, she wouldn’t hesitate to turn on me. I knew how things went at Lakeshaw. There was an order to the madness, and if you stepped out of line, may God help you.
Chapter 3
Deathly calm is the precursor of death.
Eight hours of sleep wasn’t enough for me. I was more of a ten-hour gal, but I took what I could get. Mary had everyone in the house up at six in the morning to get ready for school. I knew she just wanted to make sure nobody got in trouble for being tardy, but it pissed me off to be woken up so early.
It took me ten minutes to jump in and out of the shower. I never ate breakfast, just a coffee, and I could literally be out of bed and out the door in under half an hour. I didn’t need two hours before school to get ready, but Mary was strict about our wake up time.
Not being late for school was more about keeping the living quarters discrete, out of trouble, and free from any investigation from the authorities. We were all on parole, and one wrong move was all it took to send any one of us to jail. Nobody wanted to risk a surprise visit from the police because someone showed up late one too many times.
My eyes fluttered open at my alarm, and I knew it would only be a few minutes before Mary came to check if I was still sleeping. I did my signature roll out the top bunk and onto the floor in front of Sarah, who was rubbing her eyes and groaning.
“One of these days, you’re going to land on me,” she grumbled, pushing back her blankets and sitting up.
“I’ll put you out of your misery,” I joked grimly.
That received a tired chuckle from Sarah as she swung her legs over the side of the bed and tilted her head down to snooze for another few minutes before Mary came in. She always nodded off that way so that Mary wouldn’t think she hadn’t at least tried to get out of bed.
Each room had one bathroom, which meant there was some sharing that had to happen for our mornings to start peacefully. While Sarah was asleep, I occupied the shower, shrugging off my pajama shorts, and pulling the cozy gray t-shirt that I had bought at the goodwill over my head.
I didn’t have a boyfriend, so some old guy’s shirt was all I could get ahold of. I wondered what the previous owner of this shirt would think of some young woman rubbing her tits inside of it all night. Those thoughts turned to disgust when I imagined some old dude picking up my clothes when I donated them and sleeping in them. My brain never left me alone.
I turned the shower all the way up to the hottest setting, which wasn’t actually that hot because there were about fifty other buildings attached to the same central heater. I imagined that running hot water 100 yards to the building wouldn’t be very effective no matter how hot it was at the start of its journey. By the time it came through my shower head, it was lukewarm at best.
I let the water wash over my shoulders as I examined the new bruises that decorated my hips. For a second, I didn’t remember how I got them, but then I realized they were from violently pulling myself through a small window in the men’s locker room at school. Lovely.
I doubted Jacob or his crew knew that I had been the one to break into his locker, but I would still keep my guard up at school like I always did. I was still set on disrupting his place as head honcho of Lakeshaw Academy, so I wanted to keep an eye on him to see if he was doing anything he wasn’t supposed to. It would help me to have leverage against him.
Even though I was trying to stay out of the limelight, I wanted to dress well in case I found any guys at school that caught my eye. Fucking around with criminals wasn’t ideal, but I didn’t have much else, and I was coming up on a dry spell. A woman as stunning as I was shouldn’t have to resort to toys to get off, but I took what I could get until a worthy man came along.
Sarah regularly had men over, but all the guys she fucked around with looking like they belonged in a 90s grunge band. I couldn’t vibe with her taste, but I didn’t discredit her for it either. I didn’t exactly like clean cut men myself. I preferred someone with a little more edge to get me going.
I lathered myself up with a plain bar of white, unscented soap, the suds clinging desperately to my wet skin as they slowly rolled down my body before I sprayed them away with the showerhead. The soap dried out my skin, but without it, I wouldn’t be clean. I opted for egregious amounts of lotion afterward to compensate.
I stepped out of the shower onto the thin brown rug outside the tub and grabbed a towel, letting the water on my body form soggy footsteps on the fabric while I dried myself off. I grabbed an extra-large bottle of lotion from the sink counter and pumped eight shots into my hand. I slathered it all over myself in no particular fashion.
“I know you’re sleeping. Get up,” Mary screeched into the room at Sarah, who was probably still slumped over in her bed like a corpse.
I shook my head and walked out of the bathroom in my towel, greeted by a cool gust of fresh air. I would be chilly until I got my school uniform on, but it was probably already hot outside. The sun was already shining through the window, reminding me that the dead heat of summer was close to us.
It always got humid this time of year, but I only experienced twomornings and evenings during the week. The bulk of my day was spent indoors, sitting in a classroom, listening to underpaid teachers drone on about math and science. I would sometimes slip out the locker room window to catch a break in the afternoon, but that was all the extra sunlight that I got.
Lakeshaw Academy had very few windows because they had been deemed a hazard to students and staff. Broken glass can saw through your delicate flesh to the bone, slicing up arteries and draining your blood faster than a hunger-stricken vampire. It was better that they didn’t have many windows at Lakeshaw with how much violence there was. It only takes one person to get thrown through the window, and they’re minced meat.
Lakeshaw was very strict on violence because they were an experimental government-funded facility, set on proving that young adult reform is possible. Any form of violence is often met with severe punishment, but that didn’t stop it from happening.
I tried to stay out of the way of all that, but sometimes I would stumble on a fight or attack, especially in the women’s locker rooms where the male staff wasn’t allowed. Half the staff having access meant half the risk, and to some people, those were good odds.
I let Sarah take the bathroom before dropping my towel and getting dressed. I always wore black because it was my favorite color, but sometimes I splashed in a little red with it. Today I slipped into black panties, my uniform pleated black skirt, a black button-down blouse, and black sneakers with chunky heels so that I wouldn’t look so short.
I did my hair up in a red ribbon and checked myself out in the mirror. Yeah, I looked hot as fuck. I only wished that someone cute would think the same. My last boyfriend was long gone in my home city, probably fucking someone else. I didn’t care because he turned out to be a prick, but it sucked that he was having more fun than I was.
I grabbed my bag and went to the kitchen to sip on a black coffee for a while before I meandered over to the school. I wasn’t in a hurry.
Chapter 4
The future is bleak.
Two cups of coffee later, I was on my way to school. I walked slowly, soaking up the warm, humid morning air into my skin and lungs before I entered the cold looming building ahead. It was always several degrees colder inside than it was outside, no matter what time of year. The building was
solid concrete, doing a fabulous job of keeping any and all sunlight out.
I saw a crowd of other students filing off a bus and walking toward the school. I never took the bus because I was close enough to walk, but even if it took me an hour of walking, I still wouldn’t take the bus. Imagine being crammed shoulder to shoulder with a bunch of angry criminals. I’ll pass.
We had to pass through a security check at the front door which consisted of little more than a metal detector and some fat guy that would stop you if you had more than one bag on you. It wouldn’t be difficult to slip a ceramic knife into your book bag if you really wanted to.
Having a security check didn’t make me feel any safer. The real danger was the students. They didn’t need weapons to make you suffer.
I walked through the checkpoint with ease. I never brought anything I wasn’t supposed to have to school. I did very little at school except for learning. That was why I was there, after all.
I spotted Jacob and his gang standing by the water fountain, scanning the array of students as they filed in. He was like an eagle, perched and ready to swoop down on unsuspecting prey. I put my head down, hurrying past him and his friends, but I was called out.
“Hey, goth girl,” Jacob bellowed down the hall at me as I tried to blend in with the other students.
I kept moving, getting lost in the sea of people as my heart fluttered in my chest. I didn’t want to get caught up in Jacob’s business so soon. I wasn’t ready. I had no way to defend myself.
I didn’t look back, but I knew that Jacob had entered the swarm of students. He was following me. I heard him call out to me again, but it was faint in the bustle of people. I may still have a chance to escape him.
I rounded a corner and spun the combination to my locker open, grabbing my books and slamming it shut within five seconds. Any time I wasted was time that Jacob had to catch up to me and confront me.
