by Bella King
I was a broken woman, but Jacob was for worse off than I was. He buried his pain under his ego. Power was what made him feel safe, and I had threatened his power. That made me the enemy. I had more power than I gave myself credit for.
I wasn’t sure what Jacob’s next move would be. Would he continue to harass and threaten me, or would he law low and seethe in resentment until the bad energy faded between us? Would he grow distant and become a forgotten face, or would he continue to appear in my nightmares, unwilling to let this go?
It was time for me to wash myself clean of this and prepare to finish my time at Lakeshaw Academy in a more peaceful manner. I would be back to the river, meditating to the sound of the water, except this time, I would be far from any place that Jacob knew about. He wouldn’t find me now.
I didn’t go straight home when I was left to fend for myself at the entrance of the housing complex. I went to the store with the twenty dollars I still had to buy a new pane of glass for the window that Jacob had broken. It was a symbolic effort to remove any hint of him from my life. I needed no more reminders of his cruelty. Today had been enough.
The uneasiness of my stomach had left me and had been replaced by a pleasant fullness from the junk food that I had crammed inside of my belly. I still had room for some more fries, and I rather liked the idea of eating my feelings away. I made it a point to buy the cheapest glass I could find so I would still have money for fries afterward.
I had to walk for forty-five minutes just to get to the hardware store, but it was nice to be outside in the evening, alone with my thoughts. Nobody else was outside that I could see or hear. I had the crumbling streets to myself.
I found myself trying to figure out what had made Jacob such an unpleasant and aggressive person. He was rugged, handsome, but totally fucked up. There had to be something in his past that made him behave like this.
I already knew why I was a thief and a combative young woman. That had been drilled into me for years until it stuck like pine sap in the summer. I could never rinse it off completely, but it hadn’t fried my brain to the point of no return. I knew how to be civil, and I was making serious efforts to change my ways. I was on the road to redemption, so to speak, but Jacob was heading in the opposite direction, toward hell.
I assumed that he suffered some type of abuse in his past. His aggression was a clear sign of a violent upbringing. I was no psychologist, but I knew behavioral patterns when I saw them, and Jacob constantly set off my internal ‘troubled past’ alarm.
Wherever he came from, it must have been ruthless. It was a kill or be killed world in some cities, even worse than where I was from. Sometimes the only way to get your next meal was to take it from someone else. Places like that made monsters out of good men.
It did cross my mind that Jacob could have come from a nice home and just had something tragically wrong with his genetics. That would be a nice reason to hate him, but I couldn’t bring myself to believe that. It was too unlikely a reason for his personality.
It was still a mystery why he had beaten someone to the brink of death. He mentioned it before, but I didn’t want to ask him, fearing what he would say. I suppose the mystery made it easier for me to sympathize with him. I couldn’t imagine even tolerating him if he had beaten up someone completely innocent. There had to have been a better reason.
At this point, it didn’t matter what I thought of him. I didn’t want him in my life, and I had let him cross a very important line when he had kissed me. I even agreed to get food with him afterward. How stupid was I? I had set myself up for that question about the dance.
I began to think that it might be my fault for offending him. Had I led him on and then shot him down? Now I was confused.
I shook the thoughts from my head as I walked and instead gazed at the vast sky above me. It was a beautiful evening, and I could already see the moon rising in the sky. It was almost full, just a sliver of it in shadow.
My mother had told me that the full moon was a chance to change things, a turning point in the month. If you really wanted something, you would meditate beneath the full moon to will it into existence. I wasn’t partial to mystical thinking anymore, but things like that gave people hope when they had nothing else.
These days I was in a similar position of desperation. I needed one thing, and that was hope. I made a mental note to go to sleep by the river again during the full moon. I could spend my night thinking of ways to improve my situation and meditating. It wouldn’t hurt.
I checked my watch and quickened my pace. It was almost eight, and curfew started at ten. I needed to be fast if I was going to hit the hardware store and still have time to grab some fries before I went home. I didn’t want to take any more risks today. Speeding around with Jacob had been enough thrill to last me the rest of my time here at Lakeshaw.
Chapter 19
Things can never go back to the way they were.
When I got back home, I was pulled in by my shirt collar by Mary and flung up against the wall. “Where the hell have you been?”
I dropped my bag onto the floor, nearly breaking the glass pane inside of it. “Nowhere. I mean, I haven’t been doing anything,” I blurted.
Mary loosened her grip but kept her arm against me. “You’ve been sneaking around at night and neglecting your chores around here. Just because you’re riding some man’s dick now, doesn’t mean you’re not a part of this household. The window is still broken, and the trash is stinking us the kitchen,” she scolded, her voice brimming with anger.
“I brought the glass,” I said meekly, trying to slip out of her grip.
Mary shook her head. “Take the damn trash out and fix the window. Then, we’ll talk about what bullshit you’ve been getting into.”
I nodded my head innocently. “Sure thing,” I said, trying to keep the peace.
Mary squinted at me. “Don’t run off again or I’m changing the locks on you.”
I shook my head with the same innocent look on my face. “I won’t.”
Mary let go of me and I breathed a sigh of relief. “You know, I wasn’t riding anyone’s dick,” I said as she walked back into the kitchen.
“I don’t care what you were doing. Breaking curfew is not going to be tolerated here.”
I made a guilty face, knowing that I would be breaking curfew again to sleep under the full moon. I guess I would just tell her that I really was riding someone dick, and that I had slept at Jacob’s place.
Gross. Maybe I would find someone else to be my scapegoat.
I grabbed the two heavy bags of trash that leaned against the wall in the kitchen, slinging the black plastic over each of my shoulders and trudging out the door to place them in the communal dumpster a few yards away. They did smell pretty bad.
When I came back in, Mary was already fixing the window for me.
“I can do that,” I said, not wanting to look like a freeloader.
“Nah, you’ll fuck it up. I don’t trust you,” Mary said.
I began to turn away to head to my bedroom, but Mary stopped me.
“Where do you think you’re going? No, you need to sit down on that couch and tell me what the hell you’ve been doing this past couple of days. I’ve barely seen you!”
I sulked back into the living room, plopping down on the old saggy couch that had probably seen a thousand asses since it was made. I crossed my legs, patting down my skirt and looking up at Mary as she finished putting the glass in place. “I’ve been with Jacob.”
“I will tell you one thing, Elise,” Mary said, looking as serious as I had ever seen her. “Don’t fuck that man. I don’t care if he promises you the world. Do not, under any circumstances, have sex with that man.”
I gave her a grossed out face, wrinkling up my nose and sticking out my tongue. “I would never do that. I was just wrapping stuff up with him, you know, paying tax, as you call it.”
Mary pursed her lips together, nodding. “That better be all it was. You should know be
tter than to get mixed up with criminals like Jacob. He’ll rip your heart out and eat it, maybe even literally. The man is a lunatic.”
“Believe me, I know,” I replied, thinking back to his kiss. “I’m through with that man.”
Mary placed her hands on her hips, examining her handiwork on the window. It looked better than I would have done. I’m sure she knew that. She turned back to me and pushed the hair from her tired face. “You should probably go to bed. It’s getting late.”
“I was going to before you pulled me back in here,” I said.
Mary closed her eyes. “Get out of here before I beat your ass,” she scolded playfully.
I laughed and sauntered out of the living room, retreating down the hallway and back into my bedroom.
Sarah was already asleep in bed with the lights off. I discovered this as I flicked them on and witnessed her turning in bed. I quickly turned the lights back off and slunk to the bathroom to brush my teeth and shower before bed. There was no telling what tomorrow would bring.
Chapter 20
The devil still walks during the day.
The second I stepped foot into Lakeshaw Academy, I knew something was up. I was approached by a nerdy guy who seemed to have been stretched by a taffy machine at some point in his life because his height seemed to be at the cost of his width. His arms were like pasta noodles, and not the kind that I liked.
“What’s up, Elise? Do you want to go to the dance with me?” The man asked.
“What? Who are you?” I asked, repulsed that someone like this would approach me. Normally guys his ugly kept their distance because they were intimidated by me. Had I lost my edge?
“Don’t act like you don’t know me,” the man said playfully. “Are you messing around? You have a crush on me, right?”
I rolled my eyes. “No, who told you that?”
“Jacob,” the man said, not missing a beat. He looked disappointed by my response, like he had been expecting to hear that I was secretly in love with him. He should have known not to trust Jacob.
I groaned. “He’s a fucking liar,” I snapped, shoving past him and nearly knocking him to the ground. The guy must have only weighed a hundred or so pounds.
I shook my head as I walked down the hallway, only to be stopped by another equally repulsive man. “Hey, do you want to go-”
“No,” I said, feeling my temperature starting to rise. My heart was doing angry drumbeats beneath my ribcage. The next dickwad that asked me to the dance was going to get a sucker punch to the groin.
“Hey, Elise.”
I ignored the unfamiliar voice, not wanting to get thrown in detention for rearranging some poor sap’s face before my first class.
“Elise, over here!”
Jesus Christ, how many guys had Jacob told that I liked them? I was going to get that son of a bitch. This shit wasn’t funny. What an immature way to handle rejection.
I stormed to my first class, ignoring all the guys that called out to me in the hallway. It was maddening. There were at least fifteen guys that had called out my name leading up to my first class. I wouldn’t make it to lunch without killing someone at this rate. I had to find Jacob.
I had a note passed to me in class, which I promptly tore to shreds in full visibility of whoever had written it to me. I wasn’t going to entertain any more of this nonsense. I wanted to send a clear message that I wasn’t available.
I didn’t receive any more notes during class, but once the teacher was finished droning on about things that nobody would remember until they were cramming for the exam, I was confronted by another student in the doorway while I was attempting to leave.
“Elise, do you want to go to the dance with me?” An awkward guy asked me, his voice cracking as he spoke.
“Go tell Jacob to fuck himself,” I spat, pushing past him and running straight into Jacob himself, bouncing off his dense torso.
“Who should I be fucking?” He asked, looking amused.
The other student scrambled off down the hall while I stood beside the classroom door with Jacob, giving him the death glare. “I know you’re behind this,” I hissed.
Jacob’s handsome face seemed frozen in the cockiest smirk I had ever since. “It’s not my fault you’re so sexy. You can have any guy at the school,” he said, making a wide gesture with one arm.
“This isn’t funny,” I said, my fists balled tightly.
“You have so many guys to pick from now. I’m helping you out,” Jacob replied.
“No, they’re all fucking hideous.”
Jacob laughed. “Now, that’s not very nice. I thought junior over there was pretty slick.”
I took a deep breath in through my nose, letting it out while counting to five in my head. This was another thing my mother had told me. Remaining calm could be achieved in times of great stress if you breathed properly. I was pulling out everything I had to keep myself from ripping Jacob’s eyeballs out of his arrogant little head.
“If you don’t stop this shit,” I began.
“You’ll do what? It’s not a crime to ask someone to the dance. If you go with someone, I’m sure people will leave you alone.”
“There’s nobody to go with,” I said.
“What about me?” He asked, putting a fist up to his chin and posing dramatically.
I rolled my eyes so hard I thought they might spin out of their sockets. “I wouldn’t go with you in a million years.”
“This could get worse for you then,” Jacob threatened.
“Are you blackmailing me?” I asked, squinting my eyes and crossing my arms over my chest.
“Call it whatever you’d like. I just know how to make things happen,” Jacob said, his voice deep and slightly more aggressive now.
“Fine,” I grumbled, my voice nicely silent.
“What’s that?” Jacob asked, leaning in.
“Fine,” I said louder, knowing full well that he had already heard me the first time.
“Fine, what?” Jacob asked.
I wrung my hands together, looking up at his stupid face with daggers shooting from my eyes. “I’ll go with you to the dance.”
Jacob pumped his fist, twirling around like a dancer and beaming with that same cock grin that had been plastered over his face since I came out of the classroom.
“Why are you suck an asshole?” I asked, shaking my head.
“What can I say? I get what I want,” he replied, his eyes flickering with victory.
I should have been more annoyed by his antics, but after enduring all those creeps trying to go to the dance with me, Jacob didn’t seem like that bad of an option. I mean, he was sought after by a lot of women, but I would be the one to go with him. That had to do something for my status here. I could use it to my advantage.
And just like that, I was going to the school dance with Jacob.
Chapter 21
Some things are best kept a secret, even from our closest friends.
I couldn’t believe that I was getting this worked up about going to the dance with Jacob. It was in a week, and I was already trying to figure out what I was going to wear.
Goddammit! I didn’t need to look nice for him. I didn’t need to dress up in a cute little dress that showed off my pale thighs and lead him to believe that I actually wanted to go with him all along but was too afraid to take the plunge.
Shit, I was falling apart.
I knew that this was going to turn out badly, but I agreed to it anyway. I had trouble resisting Jacob’s arrogant smirk and his tricky ways. There was no getting around it. He was a wicked man with too much charm piled up inside of that gigantic frame at his disposal. When he turned that knob and let it loose on me, oh my, I would lose my fucking mind.
I had to hide all of this from Sarah, who had now grown curious as to why I was scrambling around the room all evening, trying on various outfits that I would never wear to school. She knew something was awry, but I wouldn’t tell her anything. I word got out that I was going to
the dance with Jacob, Mary would have my head.
Everyone would know eventually, since it wasn’t like Jacob would hide me once we got there. My only hope was that people wouldn’t talk about it, and this would all breeze over and be forgotten without Mary or Sarah knowing.
That was a cute fantasy, but it wasn’t going to happen that way.
“What are you doing?” Sarah finally asked as I shuffled through my drawers wearing only my underwear. I had changed for the fifth time.
“Nothing,” I answered.
She cocked her head to the side, peering at me from the bottom bunk of our bed. “That doesn’t look like nothing. Do you have a date?”
“No, I’m just checking if these outfits still fit. I think I might give away some clothes,” I lied, hoping that would shut her up. It didn’t.
“Oh, I know. You’re going to the dance with someone. I already have a date. Do you want to know who it is?”
I stood up straight, humoring her. “Who is it?”
Sarah clapped her hands together, looking just as thrilled as could be. “Jonathan.”
Her words hit me like a train. That couldn’t be the same Jonathan that had stolen twenty thousand dollars from Jacob. Could it?
I placed the clothes back in the drawer and narrowed my eyes at Sarah. “That wouldn’t be one of Jacob’s friends, would it?”
“Oh, so you know him?”
The sickly feeling of dread washed over me, moving like thick vapor down through my body. Yes, I did know Jonathan, and Jonathan was about to be toast. I wondered if I should tell her. She might want to know that her date was likely to end up in a ditch, probably before the dance.
I thought better of it. Telling her that would be revealing how involved I was with Jacob and his dealings. I didn’t want to blow my cover so soon.
I twirled a strand of black hair around my finger. I probably needed to dye it again, but I didn’t have the cash. No issue, I think my date to the dance had some cash to spare. I glanced up at Sarah, realizing I hadn’t answered her question. “Oh yeah, I think I saw him one time with Jacob. I remembered the name. I don’t know,” I said, trying to push it aside.
