by Melody Grace
What the hell was he doing here?
Chase was supposed to be half-way across the country by now: out of sight, and hopefully, one day, out of mind. But instead, he was leaning against the bar, looking good enough to break her heart all over again.
And he’d seen her like this!
She cringed. So much for moving on and proving she was fine. Drunken karaoke didn’t exactly scream ‘I’m over you’, and Letitia had the sinking feeling she’d just made a fool of herself – in front of the one person she didn’t want to know just how badly she was hurting.
“Hey! That was awesome!” Eliza grabbed her, laughing. “Want to duet on the next number? I think they have some old-school Dixie Chicks on there.”
“I’m sorry,” Letitia managed to say, her head spinning. “I... have to go.”
Eliza followed her gaze over to Chase. “Oh no. Do you want me to come with you?” she asked quietly.
Letitia shook her head so fast, she got dizzy again. “No!” she exclaimed. “Stay, have fun. I’ll see you at the rehearsal dinner,” she promised, already backing clumsily through the crowd. “Congratulations!”
She managed to make it to the exit without falling flat on her face, but she was definitely unsteady on her stacked sandals as she pushed out of the door, and stepped into the cool, dark night. She took a gulp of air, wondering if the taxi service was still running, and if she still had the number stored on her phone.
Which was in her purse.
Which was still sitting in the corner of the booth, back inside the pub.
“Crapwaffle!” Letitia exclaimed, groaning. She couldn’t go back in there, not after her disaster of an escape. There was nothing for it but to put one foot (almost) in front of the other, and hoof it back to the beach house herself. But the very first step she took, she almost tripped on the gutter and would have gone sprawling into the street if a passing woman hadn’t grabbed her arm to steady her.
“Woah there,” the woman said, laughing. It was the plumber, Letitia recognized. The one who’d saved her from a very wet summer.
“Stella,” she said, remembering her name. “Thank you.”
“You OK there?” the woman asked, and Letitia must have been more tipsy than she realized, because she let out a honking great snort of amusement.
“You mean, aside from the fact I just got my heart trampled, realized that my career is stuck on a dead-end street, and now I have to fake my way through a wedding this weekend where all anyone will want to know is why am I still single?”
Stella smiled. “So, that would be a ‘no’ then.”
“Just a little.” Letitia agreed. She sighed, sinking down onto the curb to give her feet a rest. “Why can’t love be easy?” she asked, plaintive and, OK, drunk enough to just spill everything that was on her mind. “Why can’t you just meet the right guy, and fall in love, and he wants the same things as you, and you just live happily ever after in sickening, Hallmark-sappy love?”
“I don’t know,” Stella replied. She lowered herself to sit beside Letitia, and they sat there a moment, looking out across the dark Sweetbriar Cove town square. It was a quiet night – save the raucous sounds of singing from inside – and somehow, Stella seemed to understand that Letitia didn’t want another pep-talk, or more ‘atta girl’ encouragement. Instead, the other woman looked as contemplative as Letitia felt.
“I always thought there was a reason for everything…” Stella started, sounding wistful. “That every detour took me closer to finding my soulmate, one day. But if he’s out there, he’s been headed in the wrong direction, because he’s taking a hell of a long time getting here.”
Letitia gave a wry laugh. “I know exactly how that feels.”
She felt lost, too, except she was the one out there wandering blindly around with no clue how to get where she wanted to go. The maps she’d been studying had only led her further off-course, and she couldn’t help thinking back to when she’d first arrived in town, armed with a month’s worth of dinner outfits, and all her hopeful plans.
She’d been so sure she’d cracked the code on building her future; all it would take was a whirlwind summer of dating to whittle down the prospects, and find the man who checked all the boxes. Then love would surely follow, and that Hallmark happy ending she’d always pictured for herself. And she’d been right – almost.
She’d met those men. Eligible, appropriate, respectable men. Guys who would happily sign up to 2.4 babies and the white picket fence. And maybe she could have been content with any one of them…
If she hadn’t met Chase.
Letitia sighed again. Tequila or not, her heartache wasn’t going anywhere.
“How about I help get you home?” Stella suggested. “I was just heading out myself.”
“You don’t have to do that,” Letitia shook her head, and tried to get to her feet again. Tried, and failed.
“She’s right.” Chase’s voice came from behind them. “I’ll take it from here.”
Letitia’s heart sank. Him, again? She couldn’t catch a break tonight.
“I’m fine,” she lied, finally managing to haul herself up. “Just a little tipsy.”
“You’re drunk,” Chase replied bluntly. Before she knew what was happening, he had one arm around her waist, steadying as he began to steer her up the street.
“Wait a second.” Stella blocked their path, frowning. “Letitia? Are you OK with this guy?”
“What?” she blinked, then realized Stella didn’t know him. “It’s OK,” she reassured her. “He’s annoying, and infuriating, and… some other word that means infuriating,” she said, her head still fuzzy. “But, he’s one of the good ones.”
“OK then,” Stella nodded, relaxing. “Get some sleep. And remember, aspirin in the morning.”
“Aye aye, captain.”
She was still saluting when Chase took her shoulders and pivoted her around. “How many shots did you have?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
She scowled back. “Only two. And then a couple of margaritas…”
“Lightweight.” He shook his head, looking amused. “Just as long as you don’t vomit in the car. I’m borrowing it from Jackson.”
“I would never!” Letitia protested. “That would be terribly rude.”
Chase gave a chuckle. “You can barely walk, but you still care about proper etiquette?”
“My mom always said, good manners don’t cost anything,” she informed him primly.
“Uh huh. Well, how about you be polite and start walking, before I have to carry you?”
Chase began guiding her down the street, one strong arm supporting her at her waist. Letitia sighed again, but this time it was wistful.
Damn him. Still chivalrous, even after everything.
She found herself leaning closer, relishing the feel of his arms around her – so familiar, like he’d never been away. He smelled like the ocean, sea air and salt, and for a moment, she wondered if it would really be so bad if she just reached up and kissed him—
She caught herself just in time. What the hell was she doing? The only good thing about the mess she’d made tonight was that Chase didn’t know her heart was crushed to a pathetic pulp over him. For all he knew, she was partying hard out of pure joy and celebration, not to fill the aching hole he’d left in her life.
At least, that was her story, and she was sticking to it.
They made it to the end of the block without any more near-kissing disasters, and Letitia focused on keeping her distance. “Easy there,” Chase said, helping her into the car. She buckled up, and took a deep breath, glad that there was a literal barrier holding her back from him now.
It was only a short drive back to the beach house. A few minutes, maybe. She could last that long without making a fool of herself, surely?
Chase started the engine, and pulled away. “Let me know if you need me to stop,” he said, glancing over. “You really went hard tonight.”
“Well, it was a celebration,”
Letitia replied, trying to sound upbeat. “Eliza’s getting married on Saturday.”
“Ah yes, the big wedding.”
There was an edge to Chase’s tone, and Letitia felt the sting. Of course, she knew exactly how he felt about weddings.
“It should be great,” she said stubbornly. “A really happy occasion.”
Chase was silent, his eyes fixed on the road ahead as they wound down towards the shore. His profile was illuminated in the moonlight – the face Letitia had studied in secret, those early mornings in bed. She had lain beside him, just looking at him, memorizing the curve of his cheekbones and the line of his jaw, flushed with such a sense of happiness and belonging that she’d wanted to capture the moment forever.
And now those memories were all she would have.
Sadness rolled through her, so heavy, she couldn’t pretend anymore.
“I’m sorry,” she said quietly, as Chase pulled up outside the beach house. “The things I said to you the other night… It wasn’t fair. You know what you want,” she said sadly. “You told me who you were, that you didn’t want a relationship. I should have listened to you.”
Chase shut off the engine and sat there in the dark.
“I’m sorry too,” he said, his voice raw. “It’s not silly of you to want a family, a future with someone. I know that’s always been important to you. It’s why…” he paused. “It’s why I volunteered to play wingman for you. Because you deserve to have that life with somebody.”
The irony was so bittersweet, Letitia had to give a hollow laugh. “Well, that worked out great, didn’t it?”
Even Chase had to break into a wry smile. “Just perfect. A-plus marks all around.”
The silence stretched. Letitia knew that eventually she had to get out of the car, and go inside, but somehow, this felt even more final than their fight the other night.
This really was goodbye.
The moonlight reflected off the water as the waves rolled slowly in to shore. Letitia watched them, wondering if maybe in another life, they would be shucking off their clothes right now to go skinny-dipping under the stars. Maybe she would be the kind of woman to throw caution to the wind, and forget all her future plans to spend one more night in his arms.
Maybe Chase would love her back.
“I should go,” he said at last, breaking the quiet.
“Right. Of course,” Letitia agreed quickly. While she was sitting here wool-gathering, he probably couldn’t wait to be done with his good deed for the night and get away from her.
“I’m staying at Earl’s, he’s got me on a curfew,” Chase added, like he was trying to soften the blow.
She swallowed hard. “Are you… sticking around?” she couldn’t help asking. Then she shook her head. “You know, it’s none of my business.”
Chase looked away. “Just some engine trouble, I’m getting it fixed. I’ll be out of your hair soon enough.”
Out of her hair. Like he was a minor inconvenience, and not the man who was breaking her heart.
Letitia forced herself to reach for the door handle, and stand on shaky legs.
“I’ll help—” Chase tried to offer, but she cut him off.
“I can take it from here.”
Letitia paused. She knew she shouldn’t be dragging this out. Every second she spent near him was like salt in the wound, but still, she couldn’t resist turned back to look at him one last time.
“I hope you realize, love can be something wonderful,” she found herself saying. “Not with me,” she added. “Not now, but… Someday. I know you’ve been hurt, and you think it’s more trouble than it’s worth, letting someone in again. But you’re an incredible man, Chase, and you deserve to have someone, too.”
He looked at her blankly, and Letitia sighed. “Goodnight,” she said softly. “Travel safe.”
And then she made her way inside the house, to cry herself to sleep over him for what she hoped was the very last time.
19
Chase was in hell.
At least, that’s how it felt when he woke the next morning with his head pounding loud enough to cause a noise complaint. His stomach was roiling, his mouth was dry, and thanks to the bottle of Jack Daniels he’d downed after dropping Letitia home, he was hiding under the covers, and planned to never come out again.
Ever.
But someone clearly had different plans. “C’mon, get up, we’re going fishing.” A loud voice made its way under the duvet, and he heard somebody moving around the room.
Chase groaned. “Go away, Luke,” he mumbled, without opening his eyes.
“Wrong brother.”
“Fine. Jackson.” Chase burrowed deeper. He was in no mood for another family pick-me-up session. The one at the pub last night had been fine enough – until Letitia made her grand appearance, looking carefree, and tipsy and gorgeous as hell.
He’d always known she’d have no trouble getting over him. He just didn’t think it would take her all of twenty-four hours before moving on.
“Come on, lazybones. Get your ass moving.”
Whoever was out there clearly didn’t care about his hangover, because Chase’s covers were cruelly yanked away. When he finally lifted his head, and found the last sibling he expected to see standing at the end of the bed.
He blinked, wincing at the dawn light. “Aidan?”
“Present and accounted for.” The oldest Kinsella brother looked down at him with a smirk of amusement. It was clearly way too early for coherent thought, but Aidan was still freshly-shaven, wearing utility pants and a T-shirt. Chase blinked in disbelief, not sure if he was more surprised that that Aidan had dragged himself away from his penthouse in New York, or that he wasn’t even wearing a tie.
“Since when do you own boots?” he asked, confused. “And is that… camo?”
Aidan rolled his eyes. “Drink some water. Take three aspirin. Meet me outside in five minutes. Don’t keep me waiting!” he called behind him, thundering down the stairs.
Chase flopped back with a sigh. Aidan was annoyingly efficient – and relentless. There was no way he was leaving Chase to wallow in comfort, so he may as well save himself the fight. He hauled himself out of bed, grabbed the nearest pair of pants, and reluctantly slouched downstairs. Grandpa Earl was just pouring coffee, and Chase paused, desperate for a cup.
“Enjoy your early wakeup?” Earl asked, looking amused.
“You could have warned me,” Chase said, looking around for those Aspirin. “Or better yet, told him I wasn’t home.”
“And have you miss out on all the fun?” Earl’s eyes were twinkling. “That wouldn’t be fair.”
“Anyone would think you liked watching us suffer,” Chase grumbled, gulping back a glass of water. A horn sounded from outside.
“That’s your cue. Have fun,” Earl said, patting Chase on the back. “Try not to scare all the fish away with that pout.”
Aidan was waiting out front, with the engine of his Mercedes convertible already running. Chase was about to make a dig about how out of place the fishing poles looked sticking out the back, but then his brother handed him a breakfast burrito and a cup of takeout coffee, and all was forgiven.
Well, almost.
“What are you even doing out here?” Chase asked, trying to yawn and devour carbs at the same time. “You haven’t visited since Easter. And seriously: Fishing? Did you get abducted by aliens or something?” He took a grateful bite of burrito, cheese and hot sauce oozing from the foil. Aidan nearly swerved off the dirt road trying to shove a paper napkin at him.
“Not on the leather seats!”
Never mind, it was Aidan alright.
Chase gave up figuring out what the hell his brother was playing at, and focused on the food, instead. By the time they pulled up at the riverbanks outside of town, he was feeling just about human again. It was a sunny morning, and the shaded spot was blissfully quiet, away from the bustle of town. Sure, he’d rather be in bed right now, but at least he knew for sure
he wouldn’t run in to Letitia out here.
Somehow, he didn’t think fishing was her scene.
Chase felt that damn rock of regret, still heavy in his gut. No more thinking about her, he vowed. He set up his lawn chair by the riverbanks instead, jammed a baseball cap on his head, and fixed Aidan with a look.
“What’s going on?” he asked. “Nobody said you were coming, and surprises aren’t your style.”
Aidan was baiting his hook and didn’t reply, he just kicked the cooler closer to Chase. He opened it, hoping for beer, but instead, there were only—“Smoothies? Wheatgrass?” Chase asked, raising an eyebrow. “Who are you, and what have you done with my brother?”
“It called being healthy,” Aidan replied. “You should try it sometime.”
Chase rummaged deeper, until he found a plain juice that wasn’t packed with chia seeds and spirulina, whatever that was. “So?” he prompted, taking a swig. “Are you going to tell me why you’re gracing us with your presence?”
“I could smell your hangover all the way to New York,” Aidan said. He gave Chase a smirk. “What did you do last night, go swimming in a brewery?”
“I wish.” Chase watched as Aidan cast his line. “You really drove five hours just to bring me breakfast and catch a couple of bass?”
“Why not?” Aidan replied.
Chase could think of a couple dozen reasons, namely that they barely saw Aidan these days. He sent his regrets on Thanksgiving, jetted off to the Caribbean at Christmas, and only dropped by for Easter long enough to kiss their mother, give Wes a once-over, and get back on the road again to make a last-minute meeting. Chase didn’t know anyone who worked so hard, not even Letitia could rival Aidan for hours spent in the boardroom.
Letitia.
Chase sighed, and slumped lower in his seat. He’d gone all of two minutes without thinking about her again – a new record for the day.
“What’s her name?” Aidan asked, glancing over.
“What makes you think there’s a girl?” Chase tried to sound casual, but Aidan wasn’t buying it.
“There’s always a girl with you,” he smiled. “But I’m hearing this one might be something special.”
