“You have earned the privilege.” Thoughts already on the business of the day, he headed back toward the house.
Instead of following, Troth strolled deeper into the gardens, a little melancholy as she visited her favorite spots. It was still early, not long after dawn, a good time to say farewell to the serene beauty that had been balm to her soul.
She paused by waterfalls that had been tuned like a musical instrument, each trickle of water contributing to the overall harmony. The colorful ducks in the pond were awake and busily seeking their breakfast. Every pool and rock and twisted tree had memories, and she tried to engrave them all on her mind, aching at the knowledge that she would never see these sights again.
Her last stop was at the teahouse where she had meditated and Maxwell had made the offer that was going to change her life. If he had not seen her that day, she would not be planning her flight now.
She entered the house through a circular moon gate, so different from the boring rectangular doors of the Fan-qui. Even after fifteen years, she had not visited all parts of the sprawling structure. It was home to Chenqua’s grown sons and their families as well as the merchant’s wives and servants, so many rooms were private.
She would miss the courtyards, the way buildings and gardens were so intimately woven together that it was hard to say where one began and the other ended. In Britain, she gathered, it was much too cold to build homes around open spaces.
She found Ling-Ling in the lily pond courtyard, perched on the edge and gazing down at the golden carp that glided soundlessly through the depths. As always, Chenqua’s Fourth Lady was exquisitely gowned and made up, her beauty almost unreal.
“You have emerged from your rooms early,” Troth remarked as she seated herself on the stony rim of the pool.
Ling-Ling glanced up dreamily. “It is certain, Jin Kang. I carry my lord’s child.” She spread one hand over her stomach, honoring the mystery of burgeoning life.
“How wonderful!” Troth said, trying not to be too envious. “May this be the first of many strong sons. His lordship and the First Lady must be most pleased.”
“They are.” Ling-Ling smiled. “The tai-tai says it has been too long since there was a baby in the house.”
The tai-tai was Chenqua’s first and most important wife. Shrewd eyed and silver haired, the First Lady ruled the household with firmness and wisdom. By personally choosing her husband’s and sons’ wives, she assured harmony in the compound. She’d always been kind, in a remote way, to the half-blood orphan her husband had brought home. Troth said, “In two days I’m going to Macao to visit the graves of my parents.”
“Will you burn grave goods there, or don’t Christians do that?”
“It is not a Christian custom,” Troth admitted, “but I will still honor my mother and father in the Chinese way, since they lie in Chinese soil.”
Ling-Ling toyed with the golden blossom of a water lily. “You won’t be coming back, will you?”
Troth froze. “Why do you say such a thing?”
“There are many in Macao with mixed blood. You belong there, not here. In Macao, you might find a husband who will honor you and give you sons.”
“You have guessed correctly,” Troth said reluctantly. “I…I must seek a life elsewhere.”
“My lord will be sorry to lose you.”
“Please don’t tell him!”
“I shan’t give you away. You have the right to leave, since you’re not a slave, but it will be easier if no one knows your plans.” Ling-Ling flicked water from her fingertips, creating a cluster of expanding circles on the surface of the pool. “I’ve always known your path did not lie here in Canton.”
“Really?” Troth said, startled. “I didn’t know that myself.”
“You were unawakened. But you have met a man who stirs your senses, have you not? You have been different in the last weeks. Will he make you one of his ladies?”
Troth watched her friend in fascination. Ling-Ling’s youth and playfulness made it easy to underestimate her perception. “There is a man who has started me thinking,” she said carefully. “He will help me establish myself in my new home, but he has no wish to make me his lady.”
Ling-Ling arched her elegant brows. “You have much to learn of men, Mei-Lian.”
“That is the first time you’ve ever called me by my true name,” Troth said softly.
“It is fitting, since you are leaving to become a woman.”
Troth touched her hand. “I shall miss you, Ling-Ling.”
Tears glimmered in Ling-Ling’s eyes. “And I shall miss you. There is no one else who lets me tease as you do.” She glanced at her bound feet in their embroidered lion slippers. “I would not want your life. Yet…sometimes I envy your freedom.”
It was said that feet were bound so wives could not run away. Ling-Ling was proud of her position as one of Chenqua’s wives and would never dream of fleeing, but her life was a narrow one, and would become narrower still. Widows couldn’t remarry, so with a husband forty years her senior Ling-Ling was likely to spend most of her life sleeping alone. She might be content with that—but Troth wouldn’t be.
Feeling better about her uncertain future, she returned to her bedroom and washed. Then she opened her treasure box to choose what she would carry across the river today.
Gradually she’d moved her most valued possessions to the sturdy brass-bound trunk that Maxwell had provided. Her father’s Bible had gone first, followed by her mother’s jewelry and the women’s garments that had meant so much during her lonely years as Jin Kang.
Today she took the last of her father’s books and a beautifully painted scroll, tying them across her abdomen with a band of cloth before putting on her tunic. Then she made her way to the water gate so she could cross to the Settlement. This close to the end of the season the hongs were bustling, but in two more days they would be silent, and she and Maxwell would be on their way.
She wasn’t sure which was greater—her fear or her anticipation.
Chapter 13
A pile of mail arrived the day before Kyle left Canton, the last he would receive before he arrived back in England. He saved the letters for that night, to read after he finished packing.
His father’s handwriting was noticeably shaky as he described the estate business that Kyle would take over when he returned. His sister Lucia’s letter was lively and full of the details of her life, along with an uneven but earnest greeting from her oldest child, the Honorable Edward Justice, very proud of his five years.
As always, he saved his brother’s letter until last. Close as shadows in boyhood, they’d grown apart when their father sent them to different schools. At eighteen, a fierce quarrel had left them estranged for years. They’d made peace just before Kyle left for the East, but there hadn’t been much time to reweave the fabric of their relationship.
The letters had made up for that. For six years they’d written back and forth. Kyle had said things on paper that he would have found difficult to speak aloud, and Dominic had done the same. Though half a world separated them, he felt as close to his brother as he had when they were boys.
He savored the pages, which had been composed a few paragraphs at a time over several weeks. Dominic wrote an amusing blend of personal information and responses to the letters Kyle had written a year earlier. He ended, I suppose you might be home before this letter finds you. I wonder how many letters are chasing you around the Orient, all of them far better traveled than I?
It’s good that you’re returning. Wrexham is growing increasingly frail. He misses you, though he’d never admit it. I warn you, though, as soon as you show your face he’ll be matchmaking. If anything will keep him alive, it’s the prospect of seeing you produce the next generation’s heir. You are warned.
He smiled wryly, knowing his brother wasn’t joking. The Earl of Wrexham had hated having his heir leave England even though he had a perfectly good spare in Dominic. There would be a list of suitable brid
es ready when the prodigal returned.
He wrote a quick reply to the letter, even though it wouldn’t reach England much before Kyle himself. Then he stripped and packed his Western garments in a small trunk. Gavin Elliott would take it to Macao when he sailed the next day, so Kyle would be able to reclaim his wardrobe for the trip home.
His other belongings were already on the high seas. Troth had been very firm that he take nothing European to Hoshan. The only exception was his pocket pistol and ammunition. The roads they’d be traveling were fairly safe, but one never knew.
He doused the lamp and stretched out on the bed, the sheet resting lightly on his bare skin. In midspring, the nights were already uncomfortably warm. Though he’d developed a tolerance for tropical heat in the last years, he looked forward to England’s cool, invigorating climate.
His thoughts returned to marriage. Some days the prospect seemed perfectly reasonable, even though he could never care for another woman as he had Constancia. Many marriages were contracted without love—success required only kindness, mutual respect, a similarity of background and expectations. Yet when he dreamed of Constancia, he always woke with the bleak knowledge that marriage would be a disastrous mistake, miserable both for him and whatever unfortunate woman he wed.
He’d told no one that he had married Constancia; even Dominic knew only that he’d lost the mistress whom he’d loved with the best that was in him. He’d never met another woman who could match Constancia’s warmth and generosity and passion, nor one who understood him as she had. Though she had been dead for six years, she would always be the wife of his heart.
Grieving, he had obeyed her last wish and gone forth to live. But it was one thing to live, and quite another to love.
Kyle slept soundly and rose before dawn the next day, eager to be on his way. First he rubbed his face, throat, and limbs with a lotion that darkly stained his skin. Troth said the effect would last for weeks.
Then he donned the clothing she had provided. The loose blue trousers and tunic were shabby and woven of coarse fabric, purchased from a used-clothing stall. She’d been unable to find old footwear in his size, so she’d bought new shoes and scuffed them until they looked worn.
After tying a money belt around his waist under the tunic, he glanced in the mirror. He looked fairly old and worn himself, and much less like an Englishman.
A knock sounded at the door, closely followed by Gavin. “So you’re going to go through with it,” his friend said gloomily.
Kyle locked his trunk and handed the key to Gavin. “Did you really doubt it?”
“I suppose not. Have a good journey.” They shook hands.
Kyle said, “I’ll see you in Macao in a fortnight or so.”
He was reaching for the doorknob when Gavin said brusquely, “Don’t go, Maxwell. I have a bad feeling about this trip. I’ve tried to bury it, but my fey Scots ancestors keep whispering in my ear that you’re running into trouble. Serious trouble.”
Kyle blinked. “Did the fey ancestors say what to watch out for?”
Gavin shrugged wryly. “Premonitions are never specific enough to be much use—but I can’t shake the feeling that you’re risking your life. Don’t go.”
Frowning, Kyle went to the window and gazed down at the Pearl River, ghostly in the first predawn light. Gavin would not have said such a thing lightly. Was his trip to Hoshan merely a rich man’s whim?
No, his desire was much deeper than that. Perhaps in Hoshan he would discover faith, or wisdom, or something else that would add meaning to his life. Whatever awaited him there, it was worth a risk. “I appreciate the warning, but this is something I must do, Gavin.”
His friend sighed. “Then at least be careful, and do what Jin Kang tells you.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be on your doorstep in Macao before you know it.” He left the bedroom and quietly descended the steps to the ground floor. He and Troth had chosen the early hour so no one would see him dressed so oddly.
The vast spaces of the warehouse were almost empty now, the bales of goods once stored here now on their way to Britain and America, leaving only the pungent scent of tea. Later in the day the hong would be bustling as Elliott House employees closed it down for the season. With so much going on, no one would notice his absence.
As they had arranged, Troth waited in a small office at the back of the hong, her expression stern. She’d discarded her respectable clerk’s clothing for the shabby garments of a laborer. They’d make a good pair of peasants.
“You’re late, my lord. I was beginning to wonder if you’d changed your mind.”
“Never that. I was delayed because Elliott came by to say good-bye.”
As he crossed the office toward her, she said critically, “You dress like a peasant but move like a Fanqui lord. Put these under the arches of your feet.” She gave him two lengths of thick, hard cord about three inches long.
Obediently he removed his shoes and placed the cords inside, then cautiously circled around the office. “Uncomfortable. Why do I need them?”
“To make you walk like an old man with bad joints and uncertain balance.”
“Clever.” He scanned the objects Troth had set on the battered table. “That thing looks like a drowned badger.”
“Your wig, Grandfather.” She handed him a coiled, hairy mass.
Though Chinese men shaved the front half of their heads, in order to stay in position his wig had been made to cover his skull from brow to nape before trailing into a waist-length queue. The coarse hair was more gray than black. He wondered where it had come from, but was just as glad not to know. He arranged the wig on his head. “How does it look?”
“Some of your hair is showing.” She tucked an errant lock away, her fingers a featherlight brush behind his ear. He almost flinched. Maybe the threat Gavin sensed was that he’d forget himself and make advances to Troth, and she’d break his neck when repelling them. Having seen her fight, he knew she could damage him seriously.
Such speculation was nonsense, of course. Though he found her immensely attractive, he was no lust-crazed boy, unable to keep his hands to himself. There was a rare kind of innocence about Troth, and he had no intention of violating it. Still, he breathed more easily when she stepped away. “Do I look Chinese now?”
She sniffed. “Hardly. Even if your features weren’t all wrong, the color of your eyes would betray you instantly. Time to cover them.”
She took a roll of white gauze from the table and began wrapping it around his head. This was the part he knew he would hate, but there was no other way to disguise his foreignness. He distracted himself by trying to imagine what Troth would look like in a European ball gown that revealed the figure hidden beneath her shapeless garments. When they reached Macao, he’d commission her a proper wardrobe immediately.
Layer after layer of gauze swaddled the upper part of his head and his cheeks, ears, and nose. His mouth and jaw were left uncovered, as were his eyes. When she was satisfied with how well his face was disguised, she lightly drew a single layer of fabric across his eyes. After tying off the bandage, she asked, “Can you see?”
He turned his head, testing his vision. “Much better than I expected. The world is a little hazy, but I can see and hear quite well, and talk and breathe with no problem.”
“Good. The bandage is too clean, though.” She ran her fingers along the dusty edge of the floor and wiped them on the bandages. Then she placed a cap over his head. “Take a look at yourself, Grandfather.”
He glanced into the small mirror she placed in his hand and saw the image of a drab, injured old man. With only his mouth visible, nothing revealed that he was foreign. “You’re brilliant, Troth.”
“I’d better be.” Her tone was troubled. “I hope I’m not forgetting something.”
He lowered the mirror. “If you really don’t want to undertake this journey, it’s not too late to back out. We can sail to Macao with Gavin Elliott today.”
She hesitated, an
d for a moment he feared she would take him at his word. Then she shook her head. “No. We have a bargain, and I will fulfill my end. Besides, I wish to see the temple also.”
“And to say good-bye to your mother’s country?”
Her mouth tightened. All business, she scanned him with narrow-eyed thoroughness. “Take off the gold ring. No peasant would have such a thing.”
The Celtic knotwork ring was so much a part of him that he’d forgotten it was on his hand. As he tugged it off, he remembered what he’d brought her. He reached under his tunic to unfasten the money belt and handed it to her. “This is for you.”
Her eyes widened when she opened one of the belt’s pockets and saw the carefully chosen mixture of coins and silver ingots, all worn from use and unlikely to attract attention. “Why are you giving me so much money?”
“You’re the one who will be paying the bills as we travel.”
Her brows rose as she checked the contents of the other pockets. “This is far more than I shall need for the journey.”
“If something happens to me, you’ll need funds to get to Macao and England. Gavin Elliott will help you—he even mentioned the possibility of hiring Jin Kang for his new London office—but you’ll feel better if you have something to fall back on.” He gave her the ring. “Pack this in there, too.”
She tucked the ring into a small empty pocket of the money belt so that it wouldn’t be scratched, then tied the belt under her tunic. “What is it like to be able to buy whatever you want?”
He remembered how useless his fortune had been to restore Constancia’s health. “Money can’t buy miracles, but it does give freedom and power. I periodically stop to give thanks that I’ve never had to worry about something that is a crushing concern of half the people in the world.”
She touched the hard bulge of the money belt under her tunic. “Freedom and power. I’ve had little enough of either.”
She was a brave woman. Would he have the courage to walk away from the only life he’d known? “For better and worse, your future will be different from your past.”
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