Skulduggery 8: Building a Criminal Empire

by Logan Jacobs

  “Don’t worry, I ate plenty,” Ava said with a smile. “And thank you all for taking such good care of me.”

  “What are friends for?” Penny shrugged. “Now you take care of our girl, Wade! I know you won’t let anything happen to her, but still… just be safe, okay?”

  “We will, I promise,” I said. “You and Dar stay safe, too, and we’ll be back as soon as we can.”

  After Ava and I dressed in a pair of our regular clothes instead of our party outfits, we collected all our things and our weapons and then left the apartment. I was right that there weren’t too many people out on the streets right now, and I was glad for the silence so I could think about my plan a little more as we walked along back toward the portal.

  I couldn’t believe that I had just said out loud that I thought we should overthrow the elves. Of course, I had always wanted to, or at least, I had always dreamed that one day, I might be part of such a movement. But I sure as shit had never thought that I would be the leader of this revolution, and I certainly hadn’t expected this day to come so soon.

  But as I glanced at the beautiful blonde assassin beside me, I knew that we didn’t have a choice. I had meant what I said: I would be damned before I let my children grow up in the same world that I did. I didn’t want them to have to worry that orcs might go on a rampage through their village and kill their whole family, and even worse, I didn’t want them to ever have to wonder who their parents were at all, like what had happened to Ava.

  I knew it was risky to revolt against the elves, since one wrong move would get us all executed anyway. But for one thing, I didn’t plan to lead a rebellion right away, not until we had enough armor, weapons, equipment, and money to fund a real chance at victory. And for another thing, I was going to make damn sure that we had planned everything as much as we could down to the last detail.

  Because if we were careful, and we did this right, then the elves would never stand a chance.

  When we were still about five minutes away from the Hanging Gardens, Ava suddenly nudged me in the ribs, and I noticed that her hand slipped toward one of the daggers that she had concealed at her waist.

  “Someone’s just around the corner up ahead,” the blonde assassin said. “I think they might be waiting for us.”

  “Then I’d hate to disappoint them,” I said with a grin. “Don’t draw your weapon just yet, but be ready to attack if shit goes south.”

  “Don’t worry,” Ava replied. “I’m always ready.”

  As soon as we came around the next corner, I saw the group of people that Ava had sensed, and I laid my hand on the assassin’s arm. There were five of them all together, and that included three halflings, one dwarf, and one human.

  I didn’t think they meant us any harm, but I didn’t like the fact that they had spread out across the street like they wanted to block our path. Still, since we had managed to avoid whatever passed for law enforcement in this city so far, there was no reason to kill anyone in broad daylight if we didn’t have to.

  “Hey,” one of the halflings said and stepped forward.

  Ava bristled at my side, but she held herself still. Before the halfling could speak again, something shiny caught my eye on the front of his tunic, and I immediately recognized it as the guild leader pin for the Thief’s Guild-- only since we were in the Gold City, it was gold instead of silver like my own.

  “I hope you have a better reason for blocking my path than just to say hello,” I sighed.

  “We know who the fuck you are, Wade,” the halfling announced.

  Chapter 9

  It only threw me off for a second that these members of the city’s Thief’s Guild knew my name. I almost panicked, but then I remembered that I had hidden my own silver guild leader pin every time I came to the Gold City, and I could even feel it in my pocket right now, so there was no way that anyone had seen me wear it around here.

  And since the guild leader pin was the only thing that would have made me easy to recognize, it was impossible that thieves here would have any idea who I was. I doubted they had even heard of Wade the Thief here, and that meant there was only one explanation for how these people knew my name.

  They knew me as Wade the Trader, as Wade the Wealthy Businessman, and that meant they wanted to see me on business.

  “Okay, so you know my name,” I said. “But just who do you think I am, and just what the fuck do you think you know?”

  “We know you’re from out of town, but nobody seems to know exactly where,” the halfling guild leader said. “And more importantly, we also know that you’re the one who’s been selling whiskey all over our city.”

  Ava pressed her body up against me a little more tightly, but I kept my hand on her arm, so she would know not to draw her weapons yet.

  “Do you, now?” I laughed. “Well, good. I’ve been fucking waiting for you, so I’m glad you finally came to talk to me about it.”

  “Wait… what?” the halfling asked.

  “You heard me right,” I said. “The Thief’s Guild is a valuable resource in any city, and I have a feeling you’re even more valuable here in the Gold City than in other places.”

  “And why is that?” the dwarf thief behind his guild leader asked.

  “Because of all the goddamn opportunities here,” I said with a smile. “We are going to make just a shitload of coin working together. Now, how about you all follow me to the park at the end of this road, and we can talk there in a little more privacy, okay?”

  “Errr… okay,” the halfling leader grumbled.

  Clearly, this conversation had not gone the way he’d planned so far.

  That was too bad, because it was going exactly the way that I planned.

  I led Ava and the Thief’s Guild members to the small park at the end of this road, and once the assassin had checked the perimeter, we all sat down on a series of benches that faced each other beside a low stone fountain.

  “So you…” the halfling guild leader began. “So you knew that we were looking for you?”

  “I sure as hell hoped that you were,” I scoffed. “I don’t know how to find you. I’m new here.”

  “Aren’t you, ah, worried that we know about the whiskey?” one of the other halfling thieves asked.

  “Why would I be worried?” I shrugged. “If you wanted to turn me in, you already would have, but I know that’s not really why you wanted to see me.”

  “It’s not?” the guild leader asked.

  “No, it’s not,” I replied. “The real reason that you wanted to see me is the same reason that I wanted to see you. I want to bring you in on my little whiskey business.”

  “You do?” The halfling raised his eyebrows and then glanced at the other members of his guild. “I mean… no, that’s really what I mean. I guess I’m just surprised that you’d… you know, want to work with a bunch of strangers.”

  “I like the Thief’s Guild,” I said. “In fact, some of my best friends are from the Thief’s Guild-- not your guild, of course, but another one.”

  “Okay, so you want to bring us into your business,” the dwarf thief said. “What exactly does that look like, if you don’t mind me asking? We’re not really, uh…”

  “Salesmen?” Ava guessed.

  “Right,” the dwarf said. “We’re not really salesmen. We steal shit, but we don’t sell it, you know?”

  “I understand,” I said, “and I wouldn’t ask you to do anything that’s not in your nature.”

  “So that means…” the halfling guild leader trailed off.

  I knew that I was making him wait for it, but I wanted him to get good and excited about whatever opportunity I was about to share with him, and that meant he needed to suffer from a little bit of anticipation first.

  “It means that I want you to steal something for me,” I said. “And trust me, this is the kind of theft that guild members only ever dream of.”

  “Okay,” the guild leader said. “We’re listening.”

  “I kno
w the elves smuggle their temple wine into the city,” I said as I leaned forward, “and I want your guild to fucking steal it from them.”

  “By the Ancients,” one of the other halflings swore.

  “I want you to steal the whole next shipment,” I said, “so the elves will be desperate for alcohol, and then who do you think will come along as their savior?”

  “The only person in town who has access to a fuck ton of whiskey,” Ava murmured.

  “Exactly,” I said. “And that’s me.”

  “But that means we’d have to…” the human thief gulped. “That means we’d have to steal from the elves, and that’s definitely illegal.”

  “And not only that,” one of the halflings added, “but we’d have to steal their temple wine, and that’s one of the most sacred things that the elves have.”

  “It didn’t look all that sacred last night when the elves were passing it around their party,” Ava muttered.

  “Well, sure, it’s not sacred when they use it to get drunk,” the halfling guild leader said, “but if someone were to steal it all of a sudden, it might somehow mysteriously become the most sacred thing that’s ever existed.”

  “Maybe,” I said, “but I have a feeling that if we offer them something better before they have too much time to get all twisted up about it, they won’t mind the theft all that much.”

  “I understand,” the guild leader said, “and just so you know, we have tasted your whiskey, so we know you’re not kidding when you say that it’s better than that nasty temple shit. But that’s still a big risk for us, you know.”

  “But a big risk also means a big pay-off,” I said with a grin. “I know you’re scared to steal from the elves, and trust me, I get it. But I’m prepared to pay you a lot of coin to take care of this for me, so I think it’ll be worth your efforts.”

  “How much coin are we talking about?” the dwarf thief asked.

  “How does a hundred gold sound to you?” I grinned.

  It was a hell of a lot of money to offer, but with all the new clients we had gained in the Gold City, we could easily afford it. And I wanted to make sure the thieves had plenty of motivation to do what I asked, and if there was one thing I knew about thieves-- well, about most people, really-- it was that money was the best motivator.

  “A hundred gold to steal some shitty wine?” the halfling guild leader laughed. “I mean, I know we’ve got to steal it from the elves, but… that’s more than fair, Wade.”

  “I know,” I said with a shrug. “So, do we have a deal?”

  The guild leader glanced at the other thieves, but they all couldn’t nod fast enough, so he turned back toward me with a smile.

  “Absolutely, you have yourselves a deal,” the halfling said and then shook my hand.

  “Good, then you’ll get your payment as soon as you steal the wine for me,” I said.

  “That’s fair,” the guild leader said, “but I just have one question before we can get started-- what do you want us to do with the wine?”

  “You can throw that trash into the fucking lake,” I snickered, but then I paused as I remembered the whole reason that the city had thrown a celebration for Tevian. “Actually, no. I have a better idea.”

  “You do?” Ava glanced up at me.

  “Whenever you get the wine, take it out of the city,” I said. “You know the areas that the wild orcs like to roam, right?”

  “Yeah, everybody knows the areas to stay away from if they leave the city walls,” the halfling guild leader replied. “But that elven general just drove the orcs back into the mountains, so why do you ask?”

  “And you’re sure he just drove them back?” I asked. “He didn’t eradicate all of them?”

  “They never do,” the human thief replied. “Every time the city hires someone to take care of their wild orc problem, they pay them just long enough to drive the horde back into the mountains, but they never stay long enough to actually kill all of them.”

  “That’s also because the orcs all go into hiding in the mountains,” the guild leader said. “It would take months of work to find and slaughter all of them.”

  “So you think there are still wild orcs out in the mountains, right?” I asked.

  “I’m sure,” the guild leader said, “and I’m sure they’re not actually all that far away, like the elven officials would like us to believe.”

  “That’s perfect,” I said. “In that case, I definitely want you to take the temple wine out of the city once you have it.”

  “And then put it where, exactly?” one of the other halflings asked.

  “Leave it somewhere close to the orc areas,” I said. “You don’t have to walk into the heart of orc territory or anything, but leave it close enough to their area that the orcs would be able to smell and then find the wine.”

  “Are you sure?” the dwarf thief asked. “But if the orcs smell it and then get their claws on it… well, I’m sure we all know what happens when orcs drink alcohol.”

  “And that’s exactly why you’ll all need to run like hell once you drop the wine off,” I said. “You’ll be fine once you get back inside the city walls. This is just to… you know, stir the pot a little bit.”

  “You would have made a great thief, Wade,” the guild leader said with a smile. “If you’re ever looking for a change in your line of work, we’d be happy to have you.”

  “I appreciate that,” I laughed, “but trust me, I’m perfectly happy with my whiskey business.”

  “As you should be,” the human thief said. “It’s fucking badass.”

  “I happen to agree with you on that one,” I said. “So, are you all clear on what to do?”

  “Steal the next shipment of temple wine,” the guild leader said, “and then leave it somewhere outside the city where the wild orcs will be able to sniff it out.”

  “And then come find me to get paid,” I said. “That’s exactly it. And since you found me today without any problems, I assume you probably already know the location of my lodgings here in town.”

  “We do,” the guild leader said, “but we would never have taken advantage or tried to--”

  “It’s fine,” I said. “It just makes it easier on me, so once you have all that taken care of, you come find me.”

  “We will, absolutely,” the halfling guild leader said and shook my hand again. “Thank you so much, Wade. You have no idea how much we need this job, but you won’t regret bringing us into it, I promise.”

  “I’m sure I won’t,” I said. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to get back to my morning walk with my woman here.”

  “Of course,” the halfling said. “We’ll be in touch soon.”

  And just like that, the thieves all stood up from the benches and followed their leader out of the park and then out of sight further down the road.

  “You really are a troublemaker, aren’t you?” Ava grinned.

  “I might like to make things interesting,” I said with a smirk. “Is that so wrong?”

  “Not at all,” the blonde assassin said and leaned over to kiss me. “But personally, I think that means you would have been just as good an assassin as you would a thief.”

  “That means a lot, coming from you,” I said.

  “So you want to provoke an attack by the wild orcs, right?” Ava asked. “And that’s why you want them to sniff out the temple wine?”

  “That’s the idea,” I said. “If it doesn’t work, it’s no big loss, but if it does… well, a wild orc attack so soon after Tevian was supposed to have driven them back… that would look pretty shitty for our favorite elven general, wouldn’t it?”

  “It would be quite poetic if we managed to disgrace him here in his new city, just like we disgraced him back home,” the assassin said with a smile.

  “I thought so, too,” I said. “And even if that doesn’t work, at least the elves won’t have access to their next shipment of wine, and that means they’ll be all too eager to buy my whiskey.”


  “Then let’s hope Dar and Penny manage to find a frontman soon,” Ava said.

  “I’m sure they will,” I said. “But for now, you and I had better hurry up and go back through the portal, so we can start to take care of the rest of our business.”

  It didn’t take us long to reach the Hanging Gardens, and once I aimed my magic compass at the stone wall, the passageway opened up for us, and we slipped through back into the portal room in our own city. We greeted the door, quickly made our way up out of the catacombs, and then found Dryson in the human district.

  I told the human leader to meet us at Twila’s dancehall in an hour, and once I was sure that he knew where it was, Ava and I continued on through the rest of the city until we finally came to the elven officer barracks in the halfling district.

  I made sure to pull the guild leader pin out of my pocket and fix it onto my tunic, so there would be no question of whether or not I could stride right into the courtyard of the elven jail. But almost as soon as we reached the entrance, Golierian himself appeared out of the barracks, waved, and then hurried over to join us.

  “I haven’t seen you two in a while,” the night elf said with a smile. “How’ve you been? But I guess you’re probably here on business, aren’t you?”

  “Let’s walk and talk,” I said, and then I led us away from the barracks and the jail. “Do you have any news to report on your end?”

  “Not anything that you don’t already know about,” Golierian said. “The elven guards who used to be stationed in the human district have finally started to get settled in the dwarven district, and as much as they weren’t happy about the move, I think they’re actually enjoying the fact that they’re in a more civilized district now. No offense, of course.”

  I didn’t give a shit if the elven soldiers enjoyed their new post or not, but I didn’t think that piece of information was necessary to share with the captain of the elven guard.

  “Of course,” I said instead. “Any problems with unruly dwarves since their own guard organization was abolished?”