by V. K. Ludwig
“Sh!” Isabelle flung her hand up and sneaked over to the second last door. She wrapped her hand around Rose’s head and pressed her ear against the chipped metal door. “I hear voices. I would say two but could be more. One is definitely female.”
“What do we do now?” I whispered. “Should we kick it in? Knock?”
Isabelle sighed. “I’ll just knock, I guess. Time to find out what all this is about.”
Her knuckles darted towards the door and…
“Are you Ayanna?”
My heart skipped a beat. The young man squeezed his head through the gap so tiny, the edge of the frame and the door cut into his cheeks. Guess that’s my prompt!
“I am Ayanna,” I said and stepped up to him. “I believe councilwoman Svea sent us here, though I don’t really understand why, but —”
“I am Max,” he said and stared at me from raised brows. “The scientist? You know, the guy everyone says got kidnapped by the clanswoman?”
“Oh.” I nodded and shifted my weight to the right peeking through the gap. A woman with copper red hair stood in a wide stance, a knife in her hand. “So, um, is Autumn with you then? I am sorry that we are just —”
“Who is she?” Max pointed at my friend.
“Her name is Isabelle,” I said. “She is my friend, and we’re pretty sure Svea wanted me to bring her along. She didn’t mention anything? Obviously, she mentioned me because you know who I am. She told us to bring the baby.”
I pointed at Rose who had since awoken, gazing into the man’s hazel eyes. He looked down at her, nodded, and opened the door only wide enough for us to slip through.
Arm outstretched in a formal greeting, I walked up to Autumn. “I am Ayanna, I am very excited to meet you. The men at the clans have told —”
“Darya!” She pushed the name through clenched jaws.
“No,” I said. “My name is Ayanna.”
“Not you.” Autumn pushed my hand down and pointed at Isabelle, her nostrils flared. “Her! What the fuck are you doing here? You are supposed to be rotting somewhere in a ditch, or be the sex toy for the mountain scum.”
“What?” My eyes darted back and forth between Isabelle and Autumn, who stared each other down in an epic standoff. “This is a misunderstanding. Her name is Isabelle, and she lives at the community building with me.”
“It's not a misunderstanding,” Isabelle said. “My name isn’t really Isabelle. The council assigned me that name when they took me in, but my real name is Darya. I am… I was… Rowan’s wife.”
Every muscle in my body tensed, overwhelmed by the truth and disgusted by yet another lie in my life. Is this destructive cycle ever going to stop? Their faces paled, barely holding back the tears which gleamed from behind their colorful eyes. Max, down in the dumps, stood between them like a referee who had never read the rule book.
“You need to let me explain,” Darya said, but Autumn wouldn’t have any of it.
“How could you just disappear, after everything Rowan went through?” Autumn asked and paced the room. “Do you know that he is still sending troops out looking for you? Over a fucking year later, Darya. My brother wept himself to sleep for months, and he only stopped because now he is usually too drunk to weep by the time he tumbles into his bedroom.”
Max and I took a step back, well knowing that we had no business in this argument. Rowan, the tallest and most terrifying of them all, wept himself to sleep over the loss of his wife. A bitter taste settled at the back of my tongue and dripped down into my convulsing stomach. Guess you always want what you don’t have. I wanted the clan, Darya wanted the Districts.
Autumn pointed at Rose. “Is she yours?”
Darya nodded and turned around, showing off Rose’s concerned face. “Her name is Rose, after Rowan’s mother. She just turned nine weeks old.”
“So that’s why you came here?” Autumn shook her head, her eyes wide and tiny red veins visible. “Because you just couldn’t wait until it happened for you and Rowan?”
“I waited for years,” Darya shouted.
Rose startled at the noise, scrunched up her nose and bubbled a drawn-out cry, followed by an endless hymn of wails. Darya bounced up and down once more, then rocked from side to side. Nothing helped. Tear-streaked and defeated, she sat on one of the sleeping bags in the corner and offered the infant her breast. Once the cries died down, suckling echoed through the otherwise empty room.
“Ladies,” Max said and checked and old-fashioned analog watch on his wrist. “I hate to bring this to you, but we will have to leave, or the entire plan will fail.”
“What plan?” I asked.
He crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Svea hid us here when all hell broke loose. A few days later she came and told us to wait for you, and together we are supposed to leave the Districts at eleven-thirty tonight. Sharp.
Autumn bit her lips one more time, by now red and swollen. “There is an abandoned building at the East side of this district. Apparently, we can get out through there. That child councilwoman told us someone will wait there and bring us back to the clan.”
“How can we know the councilwoman can be trusted?” Darya asked.
“We don’t,” Autumn said. “But it’s not like we have another option. I want to believe her though; otherwise, it wouldn’t make any sense that she saved and hid us.”
I looked at her fiery eyes and stood tall. “I won’t leave without Darya.”
“Suit yourself.” Autumn walked over to the other sleeping bag and worked it into a tight roll. “I actually want her to come, so she can face Rowan and tell her what she did. It’s the least she can do after we have lost men looking for her. Two, to be precise.”
“Who?” Darya gulped.
“Do you really care?” Autumn shooed Darya off the other sleeping bag and rolled it up even tighter. “Guess when you ran away, you didn’t consider that other’s might suffer because of it.”
Darya didn’t answer, but busied herself with her blouse and pushed the fabric back over her nipple. Together, we wrapped the long stretchy fabric of her baby carrier and settled Rose close to her chest. The infant stretched her arms and wiggled her little legs, annoyance and despair growing on her blotchy face.
Once everyone was ready, we left the building and hurried along the mostly empty streets. The occasional passersby smiled and nodded their heads, which we returned from faces retreated deeply into our hoods. Darya draped her coat around Rose, giving her the appearance of a pregnant mother, which triggered the hint of a bow in some. Cold air whistled around the blocks and numbed my cheeks, but the tingle inside my chest increased with every step towards the East. There was no going back after this, and yet I thrust each step in front of the other under loud clip clops.
“This is it.” Max pointed at the barricaded floor-to-ceiling windows. “She told me the person would wait at the old subway station. The door is on the other side.”
We stepped inside, and a cloud of smoke hit me straight in the face. In an instant, it clung to my jacket, hair and rubbed itself deep inside the pores of my skin. The hood deep in the man’s face, his blue eyes, and a blazing red cigarette made up all of his face, while other features hid in the shadows. My eyes darted to Darya who placed a kiss on Rose’s hair, rubbing her back through the heavy coat.
“Name’s Clark, and that’s just about everything you need to know. You keep up because I’m leaving everyone behind who can’t pull his own weight.”
He let his cold eyes wandered along my body, coughing as if his lungs screamed for oxygen — he sucked in another puff of thick smoke instead.
“The truck’s gonna leave no questions asked, and you’re either on it or not. If the ladies don’t make it into the truck, do yourselves a favor and climb back down into the tunnel. There ain’t no good men out there I’m telling ‘ya. Wouldn’t want to meet one of those.” He flung his cigarette to the ground and crushed it out with his boot, all the while licking his lips and keeping his gaze on m
e. Fire and ice clashed inside my stomach, leaving it a battlefield of panic and doubt. Is he one of those men?
“Shut the fuck up creep,” Autumn hissed. “Don’t assume that everyone coming from the Districts was born here because I will snap your rotten spine like a toothpick if you try anything funny.”
“Ah,” he said in a drawn out way. “A clanswoman. I’d recognize that fire anywhere. But still… you ain’t got nothing on a woman from the Ash Zones. Sorry, sweetie.”
“Defenders!” Max said and pointed through the gap in the wooden board nailed to the window.
The man moaned and put himself in motion. “Ay, I had an idea shit would follow you. Nobody pays that much money to get four people out if there’s no decent risk involved. It’ll be all the more fun and now move!”
We hurried down the stairs and followed the man along the tunnel, illuminated by whatever moonlight made it through the center vents above us. We ran along a derailed train which lay on the side, the sheet metal and windows smeared with neon graffiti where the rust hadn’t eaten away on it yet. Shouts bellowed from behind and chased us down like rats, who scurried to escape a small flood of defenders. My lungs stung as if someone poked a knife into them, but I couldn’t give up now.
“Ayanna!”
For a moment I didn’t dare to turn around, but Rose’s screams bounced from the cracked tiles and turned into an ear-shattering echo. I pressed my hands to my chest. Shit! I ran back to Darya who lay on the ground, one hand on Rose’s head, the other on her leg. Deep craters of pain and fear formed on her forehead, and she fumbled the infant out from between the layers of fabric.
“Take her.” She reached Rose up, whose head bobbed and dangled at her lack muscle strength.
“No, I will help you —”
“Take her! Pleeease! I twisted my ankle, and there’s no way I will make it out of here. But you can, and so can she.”
Tears stuck to her eyelashes, thick and heavy, and she held her baby up even higher.
“Stop!” a defender yelled from the tunnel, giving his sprints his all and everything.
“Take her to Rowan, and tell him… no, just take her. Now!”
My eyes darted between the crying baby and our group who disappeared into the darkness. I grabbed Rose and pressed her into my chest, supporting her head in the palm of my hands. Then, I made a run for it.
I had reached them by the time they had climbed up a ladder.
“Where is Darya?” Autumn asked and stared at the baby in my arms.
I shook my head, suppressing the tears which formed a lake behind my eyeballs. This wasn’t the time to cry.
“Give her to me.” She grabbed Rose and cradled her in her arms. “You won’t make it up there using one hand, but I will.”
She pulled herself up close, let go and darted her hand out again for the next higher metal step. I followed behind, and Max formed the end of the line.
“Stop, or I will shoot!” a voice bellowed, each word as clear as the open sea.
“Come on now, get up there ladies,” the man said and peeked down at us from firm ground.
Ping! A sharp noise all but ripped my eardrum, cutting through metal, which left behind a ringing that vibrated all the way into my brain. A muffled Ough came from behind me, and gasoline fumes crept down into the shaft. I stepped out of the shaft, turned around and reached my hand out for Max. Blood-soaked and slippery, his palm painted mine crimson red. Another long bang sounded through the vast openness. This is it — they will kill us.
With a loud bang and under strain, Clark let the cover of the shaft slump into its place. “Get into the car.”
A wrinkled woman sat behind the wheel, a red-brown scar running along her cheek, as wide as my thumb in some places. She stepped on the gas, and together we blasted into the darkness. Rose lay cradled in Autumn’s arm, her face red and her mouth rooting for comfort.
Max pressed one hand onto his oozing thigh. The other he intertwined with Autumn’s and squeezed so hard, it was clear he didn’t intend to let it go ever again.
Chapter 30
An almost perfect ending
River
Chaos blazed through the village in the shape of a black 2032 Escalade, and I pulled myself a bit higher on the steel bars. Cold and without grip, they rampaged my palms, leaving behind white and red flecks that burned like fire. That’s what you get when you hang on them all morning.
The oversized tires came to a stop, kicking up dust like a pro soccer player, and the villagers shuffled about. Cars meant trouble or bad news, so either way, my heart pumped at record speed. Tinted windows and a bull bar in front that reminded me of braces fit for a giant screamed Ash Zones at me. Where else would you need a battleship like that unless the Districts had secretly pumped up their defense?
The crowd pushed, pulled and jumped, all to get a glimpse. I pulled myself up once more; the steel biting my callused hands, but I couldn’t see shit. Once the crowd lifted, everyone poured into the longhouse like a creek after snowmelt. My entertainment disappeared, and I stared onto the sand-whipped coat of black paint on the truck. Who the hell are those people?
I sat on the filthy low pile carpet, splashed some water in my face and used my finger as toothbrush substitute. Didn’t do much for the gunk, and even less for the rancid smell that kept creeping into my nose. Note to myself: breathe exclusively through nose.
I glanced over at the red bucket in the corner and shook my head. Rowan had asked me to install plumbing in the cells, but outlaws don’t need that kind of luxury, do they? Just one of my many mistakes, piling up at my doorstep like dog shit on fire.
Adair pressed the door code, and the bolt sprung back with a snap. He stepped inside, closed the door, and marched straight to sit on my bed.
“It stinks in here.” He peeked under the blanket and scrunched his nose.
“Huh.” I scratched the nape of my neck. “I could have sworn it smelled good enough, but then you came in here. What can I say, the stench always follows the asshole?”
The grin on my face made the wound on my jaw flare up, tearing on the stitches. He could have parked his fist right on my muzzle, but he optioned for a mischievous smile instead.
“Autumn is back,” he said, “she got here half an hour ago, with that scientist from the Districts in tow.”
I eyed him warily. What’s that got to do with me? Pushing the water to the side, I forced myself and pulled my aching fingers. “That sucks. Bet Rowan’s not happy about her bringing a hostage from the Districts along.”
“She said she loves him and they want to marry.” His gaze dropped to the floor, and he nodded as if to convince himself that it didn’t affect him. “Rowan is super pissed because she dragged another guy along. God knows the last thing we need is more dicks around here.”
“Uh-huh. Especially with such a huge dick around as yourself.”
“Yeah, about that…” He plunged his hand into his pocket and pulled a shiny little piece of paper out. “These are really difficult to find, and I hate giving one away, but I figured you might need it.”
He flung the metal green rectangle at me and spearmint filled my nostrils the moment it landed in my palm.
“You are giving me a stripe of gum?” I raised my brown at him, quickly unwrapping the thing. “Why on earth would I need gum? Does bad breath make me immune to death or something?”
“She’s here.”
The spice exploded inside my mouth, and I chewed the gum for a moment before I shrug my shoulders. “Yeah, you told me a minute ago. I’m thrilled for Rowan that he has his sister back, but I can understand that he is —”
“Ayanna is back, you idiot.”
This gotta be a joke, right? My heart pounded in my chest, resurrected and rejuvenated at the same time.
“Is that why you’re here? Can I see her?”
A huge smile plastered across his face. “Uh-huh, Rowan sent me to fetch you, but he said it doesn’t mean you’ll be off the hook. I guess
it depends on why exactly she’s here.”
“I can’t go looking like this.”
“It’s fine, you look like always.”
I ran my hand through my hair and tugged my beard into shape. And just to be on the safe side, I splashed some more water in my face and rubbed some under my armpits. “No, I look like shit.”
“Like I said.” Adair walked over to the door and held it open. “You look like always.
We walked over to the longhouse, the Escalade speeding into the horizon from afar. The creak of the door echoed through the otherwise silent longhouse. Rowan stood in a wide stance by his empty high seat, next to him, Ayanna. The playful smile on her face made me relax into a state of pure joy. I stopped a few feet in front, and for a while, none of us said a word — it didn’t matter! My eyes locked with hers, replacing all my doubts and sorrows with love. She cocked her head, breathing back those tears I saw waiting behind her gorgeous dark eyes — she came for me.
Rowan nodded at Ayanna, and she climbed down three steps to stand in front of me. Her body trembled, and each of her breaths sent a shudder down her neck. There was only one thing I could do. I opened my arms wide, and without hesitation, Ayanna threw herself into my embrace. People around us clapped, whistled and told us to get a room. I let my finger trace the softness of her lower lip, leaning in to press my desperate mouth onto hers. She wrapped her hands around my neck, demanding and confident, and let her hand glide through my curls.
Rowan cleared his throat. “I hate to interrupt this heated kiss, but we need to make this official. No pardon without marriage, just like we discussed.”
Ayanna glanced at Rowan but only left my lips to mumble a quick “I will marry him!”, before she pressed them back onto mine.
Rowan leaned into her. “Everyone needs to hear it.”
“Yes, I want to marry this man,” she shouted
Claps and howls once more resonated the longhouse, and I kissed her on her soft hair. Did she really say it? Smoke and sweat clung to her body, her face a smudged mess with reddened eyes. I pressed her hard against my chest — what did it take her to make it back here? Never would I let her leave me again, the woman who completed me more than my past ever could. One question, however, remained.
