Because of Them: Heartfelt Romance

by Melissa Macomb

  The simple solution is to make sure Tessa knows I'm not interested in Kat Rutherford. The best way to do that is to never see the woman again, which is fine with me, except I've made a commitment for the dinner party, and I need that introduction to her godfather. So, I just don't tell Tessa about that. She doesn't know anything about the rest of my business, this shouldn’t be any different. After that party, I don't have to ever go out with Kat again. The thought of what I've already done with the woman turns my stomach now. How could I ever have thought she was attractive? Sure, she's pretty, but her personality is lacking any beauty.

  Not like Tessa. She's beautiful inside and out. And I love her. So, what now?

  I need to know what I can do to keep her and the twins here.

  Picking up the house phone on my desk, I place a call to our family attorney, Caleb Berners. He's handled everything for our family ever since I can remember.

  "Caleb, hi, this is Bram Carter. Did you read the documents and letters I had sent over? Tell me you have a plan."

  "I've read the missives, Bram, and the will itself. Now, the will is very explicit and very well-drawn up, I must say. Mary and her husband were quite clear that the children were to never be separated, and that they were to be co-parented by yourself and Contessa Stephenson."

  "Tell me something I don't know, Caleb."

  "There's nothing at all that says where this co-parenting has to occur, or in what manner. I see no reason at all why we can't petition the court to declare New York state as their legal residence, given your business interests here. In this way, we can make sure that they live here with you. If Ms. Stephenson doesn't want to give up her job and home in Oklahoma, then that's on her. If, however, she does move here, you could go so far as to facilitate her move by providing an apartment for her as an incentive, and you could share custody, much as a divorced couple would. That should satisfy all the legal requirements."

  Share custody like a divorced couple. We aren't even a couple yet, and legally it will be like we're already divorced. I don't want to do that.

  "But, Bram, are you sure this is what you want to do? Do you really want to go behind the young lady's back without any consultation on her wishes? Surely that will just create hostility between the two of you. How can that be beneficial to the children? There must be a way that you and Ms. Stephenson can work this out so that she is amenable to the move here, rather than the courts forcing her to give up her home and her life?"

  "I'm not at all sure it's what I want to do. That's why I've called you, dammit, Caleb. I need some options. You don't know this woman, she's stubborn and independent, and all I keep hearing from her is she wants to take the kids and go back to Oklahoma. I just can't let that happen. The children are my responsibility, and I want them here with me." I want her here with me, too. God, how I want that.

  "I have the petition to keep the children in New York City already drawn up. I can file it today, Bram, if that's what you want me to do. But may I make a suggestion? Talk to Ms. Stephenson first. Try to sort something out that satisfies you both. It will be better for everyone concerned, especially the children. The two of you are going to be part of each other's lives at least until the twins are eighteen. That's a long time for bad blood."

  With Caleb's words ringing in my ears, I realize that my instincts are right. Tessa is the woman for me. Don't ask me how I can be so certain, especially when I've never felt this way before. Maybe it's because I've never felt this way before. I've been with a lot of women, and none of them have moved me the way Tessa does. None of them have ever gotten past the outer shell I show the world. I've never, ever wanted to spend every minute of every day with any of them.

  But I do with Tessa. Unbelievably, I do want that with Tessa. So, no more screwing around.

  I had to go out for a while and finish up some things at the office and when I get back to the apartment, it's dark. My heart thuds heavy in my ears until I realize there's a crack of light coming from down the hallway, where the bedrooms are. Relief fills me when I peek into the room the twins are sharing and see them sound asleep. The light I saw is from a little dolphin-shaped nightlight Tessa must have bought for them. They've been having nightmares since they lost their parents. Mrs. MacThomas says that's not uncommon. She suggested we take them to counseling, which both Tessa and I agree is a great idea. I make a mental note to discuss it with her tomorrow.

  The twins are curled up together in one bed and I stop a minute to watch them sleep. I can't believe how quickly my life and priorities have shifted to include these two little human beings. They are more to me than just a responsibility. I love these little kids. The realization fills me with just as much amazement as the shock that I'm in love with Tessa. Archie cries out a little and turns over, tucking his thumb in his mouth. Apparently, this is new for him. Poor little kid. Abbie puts up a front that she's strong because she doesn't want anyone to worry, but she's clutching a stuffed mermaid tightly in her sleep. I gently reach out and smooth back Abbie's black hair, so like her Aunt Tessa's.

  After leaning down and giving each warm little head a light kiss, I make my way to my own room. Tessa's door is shut and no light peaks out underneath. She must already be in bed, too. The thought of one day having the right to go in and climb in next to her is so sweet it makes me smile. I must look like a lovesick lunatic. Well, I don't give a damn.

  Even though I told the attorney to file the court papers, I decided on the way home that I'm going to take his advice and talk to Tessa. I just need to get this presentation to Davis, and the damn dinner party, out of the way first. I need to concentrate on getting that sorted out and tell Kat it's over once and for all. Then I'll be free to do my best to talk Tessa into staying here in New York.

  I know she's not in love with me, that would be too much to expect. But I think I can make her love me. I hope I can. I'm going to try.

  After this god-awful dinner party is a thing of the past.

  16

  Tessa

  I don’t mean to spy on Bram. I’m sitting in a chair in a dark corner of the twins’ room when he comes in. At first, I think he’s just being a jerk by not acknowledging me, but it’s pretty obvious now that he doesn’t even know I’m here. Maybe I should say something, but the opportunity to observe him when he thinks no one can see him is too good to pass up.

  Watching this hulk of a man lean down and smooth the hair back from Abbie's tiny face brings tears to my eyes. He’s such a contradiction, he can be such an asshole one minute and so tender the next. I've seen Bram playing games with the kids, laughing with them, and listening to their stories. But the gentleness he's showing right now, leaning down to kiss the top of Archie's head hits me right in the heart. I can’t take them away from him They need each other. We all need each other. The four of us are all hurting and damaged in our own ways. I just can't trust him not to hurt me more. But I have to trust that he won't somehow hurt the children.

  Even though Bram spends time with the kids, he's never joined in with the stories I tell them every night. Stories about their parents and when we were kids. I've encouraged him by reminding him that I don't know many of Mary's childhood stories, but he keeps resisting. Is it still too painful for him to talk about Mary? It's hard for me to go over old memories of Roman, but I've also found it helps, and the children love it. It's what they both asked us to do, in their letters. There's something else they asked me to do. I can't just conveniently ignore it. I wish I could.

  Thinking about my brother's letter reminds me of the story he’d told me, about Mary saying his kisses were better than chocolate. God help me, but Bram's are better than any chocolate I've ever had. Damn him. Of course, they would be. If only he wasn't determined to sleep with every woman in New York City. That woman today, Kat, seemed determined to stake her claim to him. Well, let her. I don't need another man in my life I can't trust. But watching him say a silent goodnight to these two little babies makes my heart melt towards him dangerously. Fal
ling in love with him would be way too easy. The sooner I get back to my world, and reality, the better. I'll have to talk to him tomorrow about going back to Oklahoma. It's past time, and I can't take no for an answer. Surely once he compares the quiet, settled, homey life I can give Archie and Abbie to his bachelor life here in the city, he'll see reason. It was after talking with Mr. Beavers this afternoon that I resolved to try to talk to Bram and work this out. There has to be a suitable compromise. I don't expect him to give me full custody and never see the kids again. I just expect him to realize his lifestyle is all wrong for them. He can come visit as often as he likes. Hell, I'll even take him up on his offer for us to come visit here every once in a while. We'll have to work it out.

  He turns from the bed and for a second, I see his face lit by the soft light of the mermaid. He looks so sad and vulnerable that I almost gasp out loud and give myself away. I have a feeling that look will haunt my dreams when the children and I are back in Oklahoma.

  I sit there in the dark for quite a while after I hear Bram close the door to his bedroom and go to bed.

  The next morning dawns with a huge clap of thunder followed by jagged eruptions of white-hot lightning. The twins, who usually only sleep until around seven anyway, are chased from their room by the storm. I can hear their little feet running down the hall to my door, which bursts open to reveal their terrified faces. To be honest, I can use some comforting, too, and I quickly turn the covers back inviting my niece and nephew to snuggle in the warmth of my king-sized bed.

  As I hold them tight, my heart cries again for the loss of my brother and sister-in-law, not only for myself, but for these tiny scraps trembling in my arms. Last night, I tossed and turned, completely at a loss as to how to get my mind to calm down. Thoughts of the battle ahead over the kids merged with thoughts of how wonderful it would be to give in to Bram's way of thinking and just stay here. Then thoughts of Kat and her contempt-filled smirk brought me back down to earth. When I finally did sleep, I dreamed of Bram's hands caressing my body, giving me pleasure beyond anything I'd ever experienced before. Just thinking about it now makes me feel tingly, so I shove all thoughts of him out of my head. Instead, I listen to the rain beating against the window next to my bed. Another huge clap of thunder causes the twins to shriek in terror and hide their faces in my chest. I snuggle them closer and murmur what I hope are soothing words.

  Drawn by the children's screams, Bram shows up at my bedroom door. The kids had left it wide open when they came in and the look on his face confuses me. If I didn't know better, I'd think he's looking at me tenderly, almost like he loves me. That look can't be for me. He's looking at the children. Of course, he loves his niece and nephew.

  "Uncle Bram, Uncle Bram! Come protect us from the storm!"

  As he walks across the room to sit on the edge of my bed, I become aware that under the covers, I'm wearing a thin, satin nightgown that leaves little to the imagination. In fact, now that Bram’s close, the twins are struggling out from under the duvet, exposing me as they reach for their uncle. I try in vain to clutch back some of it, but the kids are half on top of it now and I have to resign myself to being nearly laid bare to Bram's gaze.

  He's sure getting an eyeful. I feel my nipples tighten in response to his gold-flecked hazel -eyed stare. Defiantly, I decide to let him look his fill. Let the bastard see what he's missing out on, preferring a plastic Barbie to a real woman. By the look on his face, I can tell he likes what he sees. Then he turns his attention on Abbie and Archie, both now safely gathered in Bram's strong arms.

  "It's okay, guys. It's just the clouds and the rain playing games outside. You're safe here. You'll always be safe here."

  The depth of tenderness in his voice causes a lump in my throat.

  "Scooch closer, Aunt Tessa." Archie's little hand reaches out for mine. Without thinking, I let myself be drawn into the little group and shiver as I feel Bram's warm hand on the bare skin of my back. He caresses me lightly as his eyes once again catch mine. What I see there only confuses me more and takes my breath away. It makes me long for more of this. For more of Bram.

  "Who's hungry?" I have to put some distance between us. I grab my robe which is about to be pushed off the end of the bed by Abbie's feet and pull it on, very aware of those damned sexy hazel eyes watching the material of my gown stretch across my breasts. I have to fight like hell to keep out the memory of his fingers stroking them.

  Bram follows my lead and picks the kids up in his massive arms. "Let's go fix pancakes, whaddya say?"

  The twins giggle and scream playfully, begging to be put down. Right after he sits them on the floor, they want to be back up in the air again. Bram's laugh causes delicious feelings to curl downward from my stomach. I feel real panic now. My feelings for him are getting too strong. I can't stay here. This is pure torture. I have to talk to him today about leaving.

  No sooner do I think this than Bram seems to change into a completely different person than the one who was just seconds ago playing with the kids. He abruptly tells the kids to go get dressed for the day. Abbie, who is overly sensitive to everyone's mood, feels the shift and I can see the hurt in her eyes caused by a tone she doesn’t understand. Archie even notices something is up, and I feel his eyes on mine seeking assurance everything is still okay.

  Softening my voice to make up for Bram's harsh one, I encourage them to go ahead and get dressed so we can fix breakfast together. Then I turn my attention to the heartless jerk in front of me. "I don't know what your problem is, Bramble Carter, but you will not take it out on these children. They have things hard enough without you adding to their misery. Be an ass to me all you want, but when you speak to these children, you will do so with nothing but love and understanding in your voice, do you hear me? Now get out of my room and shut the door behind you."

  I see what I swear is a hint of shame cross his face, then it hardens into something I can't define.

  "We need to talk. Meet me in my office right after you've had breakfast. I'll be waiting."

  17

  Bram

  If I hadn't already realized I'm in love with Contessa Stephenson, seeing her there in bed cuddling two terrified children would have done it, and then some. Her long silky hair is a mess around her face and spilling onto the pillows behind her. Her deep brown eyes are still a little puffy from sleep and there's not a lick of makeup on her face.

  She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.

  The twins look so much like her side of the family with their black hair and brown eyes. The three of them look like a family and I feel left out, so it makes me feel good when the kids start begging me to join them. I don't even think twice. I join them on the bed.

  I really want to be the guy who doesn't stare at a beautiful, scantily dressed woman on the bed, but it's impossible. I know I'm staring at her, but I can't help myself. She's wearing a dark blue, lacy, clingy thing and one of her perfectly shaped legs is stretched out from under the covers, showing me those hot pink toes again. Archie pulls his Aunt Tessa close to them and I slide my arm around her, too. This is exactly what I want, every day for the rest of my life. Hard to believe that I thought my life before was enough, was worth living without this. For once, my dad's voice in my head stays silent. The temptation to rub my hand across the smooth skin on Tessa's back is too strong and I give in. I feel goose bumps break out and I know she feels this attraction, too. She's not as unaffected by me as she likes to think she is. I want this woman. I want her to love me back. But I have to remember the children are my first priority. Which reminds me I need to talk to her today about the papers Caleb is filing in court today. She's going to hate me as soon as I tell her.

  That thought causes me to need to put some distance between us. I can hear that my voice is too harsh as I tell the kids to go get dressed for breakfast, but I'm powerless to do anything about it. My heart is trying to protect itself, I guess. I can see the anger in Tessa's eyes, and I take it when she tells me where to
get off. I deserve it, if only for the blow I'm going to deliver her after breakfast when I tell her that I've filed for custody of the kids. What she doesn’t know and can’t know until after I’ve rid myself of Katrina Rutherford, is that I want her to stay, too. Not just stay, but stay with me. I want us to be a real family. But when she tells me to shut her door, I feel the distance that's come between us like a pain in my chest. I need to fix this. I want to believe that in time, she’ll come to love me, too. It's not my imagination that she feels something for me. I know she does, but then she pulls back. I've got to just stop her from pulling back, then we can have mornings like this every day. Waking up and letting the kids pile into bed with us. Making pancakes together in the kitchen.

  I know I'm smiling like a goon at the thought. I hear Mrs. MacThomas starting breakfast in the kitchen, so I stop in to request pancakes for the kids before going into my office. I've got to get this presentation for Davis polished and perfect. After Friday night, I'll be able to really concentrate all my time and energy on making one stubborn Okie woman fall in love with me.

  Listening to the kids chatter with Tessa and Mrs. MacThomas over breakfast makes me want to go join them. Nothing is really stopping me except my pride and the look in Tessa's eyes when she'd told me to shut her bedroom door. That damn woman makes me feel like a pimply teenager. I lose every bit of sense I have when she smiles at me with those sexy lips. To see them turned down in anger, and knowing I caused it, embarrasses me.

  I'm more than a little concerned about how she's going to react once I've had my say. I have to make her understand that I'm keeping the kids here with me in New York. How can I make her want to stay, too? I'm used to people doing pretty much whatever I want. I can't believe how utterly incompetent this five-foot nothing woman makes me feel. It's exasperating as hell. Shit. I can hear her coming down the hall. She has the lightest footsteps, but because she's almost always barefoot I've gotten used to the sound of her small feet on the marble floors that cover much of the apartment. I stand as she enters the room, which is kind of funny, because I recognize that I'm feeling the need to look powerful. That's usually not a problem to the point that I have to artificially generate the feeling with tricks. I force myself to sit back down. "Have a seat." I point to the leather chair opposite my desk, but she just looks at me and walks to stand by the bookshelf to my right, forcing me to turn to look at her. God, she's stubborn.