“Morning.” I say to him as he grabs my box of cigarettes and helps himself to one.
“Morning Jess,” His voice is low and gruff. Yeah he’s pissed off.
“What’s wrong?” I ask as I take a drag.
“Stef is what’s wrong! She’s back with this guy she use to date that was married. She acts as if nothing happened.” Ah, he’s jealous.
“I thought you two were just friends with special benefits?” Ugh, I don’t like saying that. It’s just weird.
“Yeah we were. I know what you’re thinking, that I wanted more. When I don’t. I just don’t want to see her get hurt.” I can understand that, he’s being sweet.
“I know, I don’t either. But this is Stef’s decision, we have to be happy for her and if the worst happens then we will be here to pick up the pieces.” Just as she was always there to help me pick up the pieces for me.
“Okay Jess, I can do that. By the way what’s got you so happy?” Shit, I haven’t spoken to him about much over the past few days.
“Well Hunter’s back and he’s coming to meet Emme today.” Get the most important thing out there first.
“What does Richie feel about Hunter being back?” Shiiit.
“Um, me and Richie broke up.”
“Let me guess, you’re back with Hunter?” I don’t say a word, “Fuck, Jess, what the hell happened?”
“Although I think Richie is the greatest guy I’ve ever met, he’s not the one for me.” That’s the simplest way I can put it.
“And you love Hunter?” He says it sarcastically and I just want to slap him silly.
“Yes I do and I always have. I know that you must think I’m daft as a brush, but he’s the love of my life and it’s not fair on anyone to be second best. Saying that, I’ve decided that we need to get to know each other again before we start dating again. He needs time to get to know Emme.” I take a longer drag as I stare at the birds in the tree chirping away as I let Owen digest what I’ve just said. I just hope Hunter understands that.
He doesn’t respond so I take that as a good thing. “So have you spoken to mum?” I haven’t heard from her in a while, ever since Hunter and Owen kicked her out.
“She tried to come around last week, but she didn’t get through the door. She was off her head and I don’t think it was just down to the booze.” Great, just what we need an alcoholic mum who’s now turning into a junkie.
“ How’s work?” I ask to change the subject. The day will come when mum has to change her ways and when she does, she’ll have no one and that’ll be her own fault.
“It’s good; it’s quiet and the pays good. Which reminds me, I’ve got some money for you.”
I’m confused, “Why would you have money for me?” I ask as I light up another cigarette.
“Jess, I’ve over two hundred quid saved up to give to you.” He says looking at me like I’ve gone mad.
“For what though?” I’m seriously confused.
“Jess, you’ve been buying me food, clothes and everything else I have needed since I came home. Not only that you paid of a debt that you shouldn’t have had to, so I’m giving you money whenever I get paid.”
“Okay, first of all, it wasn’t your debt to pay either. It’s paid, that means it’s over and done with. Secondly, you’re my brother and you live under my roof, well sort of. Anyway, use that money to save up for a deposit on a flat, a car or something.”
I can tell by the look on his face that he’s not happy about it. “You shouldn’t have to pay for me just because I’m your brother.”
I roll my eyes at him, “I pay your way because you’re just getting back on your feet and carving a new path for yourself. I earn more money now than I ever did, so I can afford to pay for you.”
“But Jess…” He begins and I steel myself for whatever’s going to come out of his mouth.
“Don’t argue with Jess.” I look to the kitchen door and see Si standing there, arms folded and a smirk on his face. “So you and Hunter are back together?”
“No. He’s coming to meet Emme today and I need to talk to you and Tony about something.” I hope that they’re okay with it. I want Emme to know all of her family. That includes Lewis, but I don’t want my brothers to feel awkward or that their feelings don’t come into consideration.
“He’s awake, let me go get him.” He starts running and I sigh. I don’t know how many bloody times I have to tell them not to run, they always end up getting injured. It doesn’t take long until both of them are out on the balcony with Owen and I.
“You wanted to talk to us about something?” Tony says while rubbing his eyes, and I know that Si was lying. He wasn’t awake when he ran into his room to get him, the little rat woke him up.
“Yeah, so I told Si that Emme is meeting Hunter today and I’m going to tell her who he is.”
“That’s great; she’s going to be so happy.” Tony interrupts me with a huge smile and I’m so glad that he’s happy for her.
“Yeah she will be, but that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about. You see, Hunter’s family want to meet her…”
“Not his mum right?” Si interrupts me.
“No, his mum and dad are getting a divorce…”
“Why?” Si interrupts me yet again.
“If you let me finish, you’d find out.” Heat starts to creep up his face and I wink at him, not wanting him to feel embarrassed. “So, his mum lied about everything. Back when I was pregnant with Emme, she told Hunter that I had an abortion and she told me that Hunter wanted me to have one. His dad has just found out about Emme and hates his wife for what she’s done so he’s divorcing her.” I tell them and watch all three of my brothers clench their jaws, they’re so much alike, yet they’ll pretend that they’re not.
“Good, the bitch deserves it. What kind of sick bitch even thinks of doing shit like that, let alone actually going through with it.” Owen says and the boys snicker.
Punching his arm, he looks to me “Serves you bloody right, don’t swear in front of the kids.” Looking back to Si and Tony, who are both smiling; “So what I wanted to talk to you about has to do with Hunter’s brother.” I watch as Tony’s body goes rigid. At least I know that he won’t be coming into the house. If just hearing his name makes him tense, I dread to think what would happen if he came here. It’s not happening. “He’ll be meeting Emme, but it won’t be here, he’s not welcome here. This is your home as much as it is ours and I won’t be having you feel uncomfortable in your own home.”
“I feel bad for Emme, maybe later on we’ll be okay to have him here, but he’s a bully and I can’t forgive him for what he’s done to Tony.” Si’s right, Tony’s been tormented for months if not longer. I finally got the full truth about how bad it was from Tony and I cried. I felt so ashamed that I hadn’t known that my baby brother was in so much pain from the taunts and evil things those bastards did to him.
“Jess, it’s fine, I promise.” Tony tells me and I know it’s so he doesn’t cause any problems. Although Lewis wasn’t the main one who bullied Tony, he was the one that started it off in the first place. They would steal his P.E kit along with mocking him that he had old trainers and that we were too poor to get him some new ones. I hate that he had to put up with things like that for so long. If he had told me I would have fixed things, either the school sorted it or I would have had him move schools.
“No Tony, it isn’t. Jess is doing the right thing. This is our house and you’re not the only one who’s uncomfortable having him here.” he can be an arsehole sometimes, but there are times when Owen talks sense and I watch as Owen’s words sink in and Tony’s whole demeanour changes. He’s glad that he’s not the reason. Even if he were, I’d still put him first and take the blame.
My phone buzzes and I look down at it to see that I have a text from Hunter. I can’t help but smile. God, who would have thought that this time last year I would be here with my brothers, and talking about introducing Emme to Hunter?
“I’m hungry. I’m going to get breakfast. Do you want a cup of tea Jess?” Si asks me as he walks back into the kitchen.
“I’d love one. Tony, can you stick your head into my room and check on Emme please.” I know that he’s going back to bed. It’s the weekend and Tony usually stays in bed until ten, unless we’re going somewhere. He’ll read something and then he’ll tell me what he learnt as he usually reads historical books, like the Tudors and the Magna Carter. He nods his head and runs through the house, I hear Owen chuckle as he too goes back into the house.
I light up another cigarette and I know that it’s getting bad again, I really do need to stop. Reading the message that Hunter sent me, makes my heart start to race.
Can’t wait to see my princess How is she? I’m excited to meet her.– Hunter
I hear footsteps pounding in the kitchen and see Tony rushing to the door, “Jess, Emme’s still asleep.” Then he’s gone again.
Shaking my head, I text him back. The smile seems to be a permanent fixture on my face.
She’s fast asleep – Jess
He replies instantly.
What time can we meet? Where are we meeting? – Hunter
How is eleven? We will meet you at the tube station. We can bring Emme to the park. – Jess
Do I have to wait that long? And yes to the park. It’s my new favourite place, especially after last night. I need a repeat performance. – Hunter
Heat creeps up my face as I blush just thinking about that kiss. God that man can kiss.
About that, we need to talk. – Jess
You’ve changed your mind haven’t you? – Hunter
Yes, we’ll talk later, I had better go and wake our princess up. she’s got a long and exciting day ahead of her. – Jess.
See you soon. – Hunter
Soon– Jess
I really hope that when we have this discussion that he understands where I’m coming from, that he knows that as much as I love him, I need time to get to know him again.
Walking into my bedroom, I see that Emme is like a bloody starfish again. It’s a wonder that I haven’t woken up with a broken nose or a swollen eye the way she fidgets in the bed. I may as well get dressed first before I wake her up. Ugh, what do I wear? We’re going to a bloody park, so it can’t be something too revealing, yet I don’t want to look like a bloody choir girl either.
I wear my black skinny jeans along with my mauve fitted jumper that comes down to my hips. It shows of my curves, yet isn’t revealing. I’m torn between my knee high boots or my flat ballet shoes.
“Mummy, where are you going?” I hear groggily from behind me, I turn around and see my baby sitting up looking at me.
“I have a surprise for you, so hurry up and get up. You need to eat breakfast, brush your teeth and then get dressed so we can leave.” Her eyes light up with delight, she’s now fully awake as she lets out a little squeal, jumps off the bed and starts running toward the door. “Don’t run Emme! What should I wear, my boots or my flats?”
“Boots, mummy. I love them.” And she’s gone, running again through the flat. I hear her talking to Simon and shake my head at her, she’s going to be so happy when she finds out.
He’s late, it’s twenty past eleven and I’m getting pissed off with waiting. I texted him and I got no reply, I rang his phone and it went straight through to voice mail. Emme has been waiting patiently and I have no idea what I’ll do if he doesn’t show up. I haven’t told her what her surprise is, so I can always pretend it was something else.
Thirty three minutes past eleven, he finally shows up. I’m beyond pissed off and Emme is still waiting patiently with a big smile on her face. I watch as her eyes widen as she sees Hunter coming towards us, “Mummy, it’s that nice man.” She says loudly and I hear Hunter chuckle.
“Sorry I’m late.”
“Emme, are you ready to go to the park now?” She nods her head and takes my hand as she knows unless we’re with the boys or another adult like Stef or Saff, she has to hold my hand. Hunter doesn’t say a word, just falls into step beside us as we walk the ten minutes to the park.
As soon as we get there, Emme’s off and running toward the slide. she’s happy as there are other kids here for her to play with. I walk over to one of the empty benches, making sure that I keep an eye on Emme at all times.
“You’re mad?” Hunter asks sounding confused.
“Of course I’m mad. You were over half an hour late and not even a text to tell me. You texted me this morning saying you couldn’t wait to see her. I thought you’d be early and would have been waiting outside the tube station for us.” Of course I’m mad, God, he’s meeting his daughter properly today and yet he’s late, that doesn’t bode well for the future.
“I’m sorry Jess. Mum came and a big argument ensued. I left as soon as I could.” He explains and it slightly appeases me.
“Don’t apologize to me, apologize to Emme. So what did your mum do now?” I watch as Emme falls down and Hunter tenses. His eyes haven’t once left her since we got here, he looks tense. “What’s wrong with you? You need to relax.”
“She could really hurt herself.” He’s still watching her and I love that, he just needs to take it down a bit.
“She’ll get hurt, and she’ll cry, bleed, puke, and everything else and we have to hold her hand throughout it all, but she’ll be right as rain again after that.”
“Was she sick much?” He looks nervous being here, his eyes following Emme as she darts around the playground.
“Nah, not really. She got a few tummy bugs which were hell when the whole house was down with it. She’d get sick and I’d get sick as I’m cleaning it up.” I laugh as I shake my head, just thinking back on the last time, sick was everywhere. “It wasn’t a pretty sight.”
“You’ve done amazingly with her Jess. I can’t seem to find the right words as thank you isn’t enough. You sacrificed your dreams to become a mum.” God, does he have to bring this up?
“There’s no need to thank me, I’ve done what any other parent would do, and I chose my daughter over everything else. It wasn’t a sacrifice, it was a privilege.” I’ve never thought of it as a sacrifice, it’s what I had to do; there was no choice or sacrifice. It was just a different path.
He just nods and I realize that he never answered my question. “So what happened with your mum?”
“Oh, she completely lost it. Jess, I was going to tell you later. Dad called the police as she was threatening to kidnap Emme. She’s been arrested for siphoning money from Dad’s business. I don’t know the ins and outs of it all yet, but when I get home, I’m going to find out.” His hands are clenched into fists.
“She comes near my daughter and I’m going to kill her.” It’s a vow, I will strangle the bitch to death, I don’t care, you don’t threaten my child.
“She won’t get near her, I promise you.” He takes my hand and squeezes it, I believe him. I don’t think he’ll let anything happen to her. He looks at me with a sad smile. “So you’ve changed your mind about us?”
“Yeah. We need to get to know each other properly before we even contemplate getting back together, you and Emme need to get to know each other. She needs all your focus right now.” It hurts to say it and I see the sorrow in his eyes, but it needs to be done.
“You’re right Jess, Emme is my main priority, but make no mistake Jess, I love you. You’re it for me. I’m not letting you walk away again. I’m gonna do as you ask and back off.” God, I think I’m never going to get used to hearing him say he loves me. I convinced myself he never did. I’m so glad that he understands where I’m coming from. I don’t want to rush into things, if we do this, I want this to be forever. I don’t want Emme caught up in a break-up.
“Are you ready for us to tell her?” We’ve been here thirty minutes already and it’s getting busier. A lot of older kids are coming in and I know what they’re like, they have no thought for the younger kids at all. They barge past them and push them ou
t of the way.
“Yeah.” He sounds choked up.
“Emme, come on, we’re going.” I call out to her as she’s about to go down the slide and she pouts. “Where do you want to tell her?”
“I don’t want to do it out in the open, will you come to mine?” He seems so unsure of himself when it comes to Emme, yet all the other times he’s confident and a bit of an arsehole.
“Yeah.” I say just as Emme reaches us. “So Emme, do you want to see Hunter’s house?” She nods enthusiastically and Hunter sags in relief. I think he’s worried about what her response will be.
Half an hour later and we’re sitting in Hunter’s rented flat. Emme’s happy she gets to be nosey and finally Hunter’s relaxed. It’s now or never.
“Emme baby, will you come here? I want to talk to you about something.” She’s over to me in a flash. I’m sitting on the sofa and she sits on the foot stool facing me. Hunter sits beside me, he’s so close that I can feel his breath on my neck.
“When I was at school, Hunter and I were boyfriend and girlfriend.” Her face scrunches up in disgust. “You’ll change your mind on dating when you get a bit older.” I can’t help but laugh when Hunter whispers ‘over my dead body’ into my ear.
“Anyway, Hunter left and I had you.” She looks confused and I don’t blame her, sometimes I forget I’m talking to a five year old. “You see your dad didn’t know about you and now he does…”
“Oh mummy, when can I see him?” her excitement is contagious. The vibes coming off Hunter are happiness and I think that my face might hurt after today with the amount of smiling I’m doing right now.
“How about now?” She nods enthusiastically. I look up at Hunter and see his eyes are so full of love as he stares at our daughter. “You’re up.” I whisper and am rewarded with his gorgeous smile. “Emme, meet your dad.” I say pointing to Hunter.
The Secrets Of Life (The Working Girls Book 1) Page 17
