by Kells, India
Knox yelled, face flat on the floor, Gage’s much heavier frame pressing down on him. That wouldn’t have kept him down on its own, but the fighter hooked his arm around his neck, in an unbreakable chokehold.
Knox fought it, his entire body straining against his friend, but apart from a strangled yell, he couldn’t break free.
“Knox, what the hell is wrong with you? Dammit! I’ve never seen you like this.”
“I just want to be left alone. Is that too much to ask?”
“Why? Fuck, man!” And with that, Gage released him, rolled away, and pushed himself up. “Knox, talk to me. You’ve always been my rock, and Locke’s too. I thought that being here, leaving your old life, was what you wanted. When I came here, you looked fine. Calmer, more at peace. I saw you living life again. I saw how you looked at Josie. I’ve never seen that light in you before. For the last ten years, you’ve been slowly dying, rotting away. You’re older than us, was part of the underground for a long time. I always worried you’d be pulled down.
“I know you call yourself a traitor for not only turning your back on the underworld but for dragging those scumbag slave drivers into the light. But could you have lived with yourself, knowing the fate of those helpless girls? We cheated, stole, killed our own. Despite everything, there was a line for us. For you. And you stayed on the right side of it.”
Knox sat, shifting until his back was against the bed. “You don’t understand. My word was the only thing that kept me from losing myself, from being like them. After the slave ring, I even lost that. I’m no better than them now.”
With a sigh, Gage sat on the floor facing him.
Knox was desperate to make him go, but on the other hand, he was grateful to have him. “I’m lost, Gage.”
His friend leaned forward, elbows on knees. “You denounced those monsters for a reason, Knox. And I’m certain you don’t regret it. You were never one of them. We never were. In our time of need, when hunger was all we had, you took care of Locke and me. You used the underground, so we survived. You were always your own man. So was Locke, so was I. Locke found his way to himself. I think you’ve found yours with Josie, while I’m still sitting on the sidelines.”
Knox rubbed his face. “You should be with Josie. You’re closer in age. You’re not as … tainted … as I am. I broke my promise to her. The last time I touched her, I hurt her.”
To his utter surprise, Gage threw his head back and laughed. Hard. So hard that Knox, while stunned at first, felt insulted without knowing why.
After wiping away the tears in his eyes, his body still trembling in merriment, Gage looked at him. “You’re blind. Josie was never for me, or anybody else for that matter. And if you’re honest with yourself instead of bashing yourself on the head, you would see it too. Even at your worst, you would never hurt her. She told me about the last time you saw her before you disappeared. She was worried she’d done something wrong. That she hadn’t been good enough for you.”
Knox didn’t think it was possible to feel worst or hate himself more. “I hurt her.”
Gage shook his head. “That’s a discussion you should have with her. But from what I understood with what she said, she was more interested in a repeat than anything else. I invited her to my bed when we brought you back…”
The surge of heat that came inside Knox, that green-eyed monster that suddenly raged, took him by surprise.
“Easy, man. She turned me down and it proved it was you she wanted, because I look way better than you, you old decrepit.”
At least that loosened something inside his chest, enough for him to produce a smile. “No more touching her from now on if you don’t want me to improve your fucking perfect face.”
Gage nodded. “I enjoyed her, but I’m not a fool. I knew from the start she wasn’t mine to have permanently. It was obvious you had a claim on her. It amazed me you were willing to share. I must admit though, I will miss our rough tumbles. You, then Locke…”
Before Knox could respond to his unexpected and unprecedented melancholy, Gage put his usual grinning mask in place. “Once we get Josie out of that ridiculous shack, you should apologize and bring her home.”
That piece of information shocked him. “You helped her move back to that shitty place?”
Knox left his room as if it had caught fire. Through the windowpanes, snow swirled angrily, with unusual intensity. He knew it would be a hell of a storm. The wind would come through the cracks of that cabin of hers and turn it into an iceberg.
He had to get to her.
Putting on his boots, Knox grabbed his coat and keys, but when he opened the door, it was obvious he wasn’t going anywhere. There was at least a foot of snow around his truck and drifts were blocking the way for as far as he could see. If his driveway was in that state, the entrance to Josie’s cabin would be impossible to get through.
Slamming the door shut, Knox cursed.
Gage looked through the window. “There’s no way we can drive there. Maybe we should wait until tomorrow, it will be hell to try to get there now. And with that snow, we could get lost in the storm if we go on foot. Does she even have a decent coat to be out in these temperatures? The snowplow will have had time to clear the snow and we can ask the guy to clear the path up to Josie’s.”
It was the sensible decision. After the storm, he would go to Josie and admit his faults, his dark side to her, and if she’d been sincere about loving him, he would fall to his knees and return the words to her.
Chapter 17
Josie huddled closer to the fire and asked herself if she should add another log or just stick her feet into the embers to warm them up.
After just over a week in luxury and comfort, the return to reality had been harsh. However, there was no way she regretted her decision. Accepting Knox’s money would have felt wrong. Each time her mind wandered toward the man, it was like there wasn’t enough air in the room and she could hardly breathe. She’d heard what people went through with withdrawal, and how long it took and was convinced it would take just as long before he was out of her system.
As usual when her mind wandered, she focused on the task at hand, on her goals.
When she walked out of the shop after Knox’s rejection, and before she turned into a puddle of tears, her first destination had been the bakery. Tony had probably sensed something was wrong as he opened his arms and welcomed her back with warm friendship.
He had promised her a job—not well paid—but enough that she could get by and not have to take on two additional jobs on the side. Always generous, Tony was glad to have her back and have her help in growing the business. He planned to eventually make her a partner, and adjust her pay accordingly.
He even proposed renovating the bakery’s attic so she could move in there. It would take a while, but she could wait. Spring would come soon enough.
The wind made her little home moan and shiver, and Josie decided that another log was in order. While she was up, she grabbed a few more blankets to settle by the hearth to sleep.
Preparing herself a nice little cocoon and praying she would be able to stave off the cold, Josie jumped when a gust of wind made her front door rattle. The storm was making her nervous and even colder. Maybe putting on another pair of socks will help. Going to the dresser, she started searching for a pair when the door shook again, a sound like thunder booming from the other side of the wooden planks. It also sounded like an angry voice.
Was this cabin fever? Maybe she could put a chair under the door handle to stop it making such a racket. When the door burst open, and slashing wind and snow invaded her little home, Josie took a step back. The second step back she took was because of the shadow who came into her home.
“Josie.”
A scream caught in her throat when the male voice registered.
Now that the intruder’s face was lit by the fire, her voice returned. “Kenneth.”
Seeing her husband in the flesh, in this setting, in the very place where she�
��d felt cold but safe, was a nightmare. “Ken … what … what are you doing here? How did you find me?”
With a kick of his heel, he shut the door. When he unzipped his coat, a stranger stood in front of her. He was so much thinner, the edges of his cheekbones were sharper, and the dark circles under his eyes were unusual for him. A haunted man stood before her.
“I asked around. And I wouldn’t have needed to step foot in this godforsaken place if you haven’t skipped the last two payments.”
The last two weeks. Josie’s heart dropped at the realization. So much had happened that she’d forgotten the transfers.
“I’m sorry. I have the money. It’s only an oversight…”
“I needed that money!!” His yell was like a punch, making back away.
“I said I’m sorry. I can make the payment in the morning.”
Ken threw his coat to the floor and before she could react, slapped her hard across the face.
Pain exploded in her cheekbone, but it was the surprise that hurt the most. He’d never attacked her like that before. He had been abusive in so many other ways, but never physically.
“You fucking fat cow. Did you think you had a choice? That I didn’t need that money?”
She could see bruises on his jaw, and it was obvious he was pissed about something, or more accurately frightened of someone. And when Ken was in that state, he could be volatile.
He started pacing the small area, kicking chairs, throwing everything he could grab against the wall. “You’re good for nothing. Is there anything you were ever good at? Don’t you understand the pressure I’m under? No, you fucking don’t!”
He started to open her drawers and cupboards, throwing stuff around, searching for something. After a wild growl, he threw a punch on the counter. There was blood, but Josie kept her gaze on his face as he continued to look around.
Steadying herself and ignoring her burning cheek, she pushed her back against the wall until she was standing. It was only a few feet to the door, but without boots and a coat, running into the forest didn’t make any sense.
However, her head was spinning, trying to think of a way she could keep him calm and in control. After destroying her entire cabin, and finding nothing left to break, he turned to her, rage in his eyes.
Before Josie could escape, he grabbed her by the hair and circled her throat with his hand. His breath smelled foul, and she recognized nothing of the man she’d loved and married.
Or maybe he was revealing who he really was to her, and she’d been blinded the entire time.
“I need that money now. And even with what you gave me, it wouldn’t be enough. The people who are after me require much more.” And his agitated rambling stopped, his eyes were alight when he looked at her again, as if he’d had a brilliant idea, his voice slow and thoughtful when he spoke. “But I could lend you to them.”
If she hadn’t been pinned to the wall, she would have sunk to her knees at what he was implying. “No. Are you mad, Ken? Never!”
He let go of her, and went to the door, tossing her boots to her. She wasn’t about to argue with him and put them on. Then, the glitter turned to steel and he took a step closer before throwing her to the floor. “It’s not something you have a say in. You owe me! And this is how you’re going to repay me. You’re nothing but ugly and stupid, and I own you.”
Her body aching from the shock, Josie grabbed the sofa to pull herself to her feet. Despite her fear, a surge of strength wound itself around her heart. Knox’s words came to her, words he’d spoken when he’d held her in his arms. He may have shown her his dark side, but he’d never abused her. He valued her opinion, told her she was worth something. That she was intelligent, desirable, kind, professional. She had dreams, and most of all, she wasn’t the same woman she used to be. She would fight back.
“I’m not going with you.”
Ken backhanded her, but she remained on her feet.
“Not only are you coming with me, but I’m testing the goods, one more time.”
“What happened to you?” She knew it was a moot point to ask him that question. Whatever happened to him, he’d turned into some uncontrollable monster.
It was pure panic flooding her veins that made her react. When Ken pushed her to the sofa, she let him come as close as she could, and when he pawed at her breasts, Josie kneed him hard in the balls before bolting for the door.
The wretched sound he made was satisfying. “You fucking bitch!” She could hear him get to his feet and run after her, screaming at her as he did. “You’re fucking dead, cow. If you aren’t useful to me, you won’t be for anybody.”
Fear made her run faster.
Going out the door felt like hitting a solid wall of ice. She was dressed in two sweaters and fleece sweatpants but they were no protection against a mountain snowstorm.
She could have headed for the road, but at this time of night, and with the weather like it was, there wouldn’t be anyone there. Instead, she set her hopes on getting to the lake and following the shore around to Knox’s cabin.
The snow was deep, making it difficult to move. Adrenaline pushed her forward, and she ignored the cold. All she could think of was Knox. Even if he didn’t want her, there was still compassion in him, enough to offer her shelter.
“Get back here, you fucking bitch!”
Her heart beating fast, Josie turned around but couldn’t see Ken through the curtain of falling snow. He must have been following the tracks she left as she ran. It was impossible to lose him, her only hope was to outrun him.
If only she could see enough to know when she’d reached the lake. All she needed to do after that was turn left and follow it to the cabin.
She was so cold, her body became sluggish. It felt like she was turning into a block of ice and she was so tired, each cold inhale sliced through her throat. Her fingers were turning numb and yet still hurt at the same time. The sweat on her skin was starting to crystallize, and she didn’t know where she was. Lost was probably the best answer.
She was still trying to figure out where to turn, when a rustling behind her made her spin just in time to see someone tackle her to the ground. Snow softened the blow, but the body pressed down hard on her.
“I told you you’re mine!” Ken’s breath was warm on her face but smelled of filth.
Twisting like crazy, she tried to push and hit him as much as she could, but nothing seemed to affect him. Then he punched her in the gut. Already having trouble drawing in air, the force of the blow left her stunned and breathless. Josie tried to crawl away, but she was so cold, and her world started to turn into a white blur.
She kicked and screamed, hitting him as hard as she could despite the snow and ice hampering her movements.
Ken cursed and grabbed her ankle, pulling hard. The snow now burned against her skin. Through the wind, she could hear loud noises and cracks. Ken howled her name in the strangest way. Then her world shifted and trembled, the ground opening beneath her feet as she fell. She’d reached the lake after all.
When her body hit the frigid lake water, the shock revived her for a second before panic set in as she went under.
Her feet touched the bottom and she realized they hadn’t ventured far onto the frozen lake which was a small blessing. A menacing growl came from in front of her and she saw Ken stumble out of the water. Beyond him, new shadows took shape through the snow. Ken’s back was to her, and slowly blending into the storm until all she saw were three dark forms. She heard a low growl, and the sound spurred her into action. If nature had decided to give her an advantage, she would take it.
Josie climbed over the edge of the bank and hoped she was running in the right direction. Her body burned with pain, and the more she moved, the more difficult it became.
Ken screamed behind her, and when she turned, she couldn’t see him. However, one of the shadows followed her.
Through the snow and trees, Josie saw wavering lights in the distance. Knox’s home was the only one
close, which meant there was hope. Hope she could make it to safety. To Knox.
How can someone move or walk without feeling their body? Or when experiencing so much pain? Josie tried to focus on her goal, but it became more and more difficult to do so.
And the lights were so far away. Miles and miles and they were spinning now, dancing through the snow. The snow looked so soft, comfy, and warm. Maybe she could burrow deep, so deep Ken or the shadow following her would never find her, and when they finally left, she could make her way to Knox.
Knox. She should have stayed and made him see. Convinced him. Pounded his thick head until he saw the light. That image made her smile.
Josie missed his sad half-grin and the way he gripped her hips to bring her closer and push her away. She loved how he buried his nose in the crook of her neck when he came, and that was something she missed. In the throes of orgasm, there were no barriers between them.
When she reached those far-away lights, Josie promised herself she would get another chance. But first, she needed to sleep.
Chapter 18
“Is she alive?”
Knox ignored Gage’s question and bypassed him to maneuver through the door.
“Go turn on the shower, not too hot. We have to warm her.”
His arms screaming, Know kept Josie as close to his body as possible even knowing she couldn’t feel his heat through his coat. Her face was so pale, almost translucent, and her lips had a tinge of blue. As they’d made their way from the lake to the cabin, her body had stopped shaking and he’d pushed himself like never before, until he felt his heart almost ready to burst with the effort it took to save her.
When steam started to billow, Knox didn’t hesitate and entered the shower with his precious bundle still in his arms. Even not directly under the spray, the water still stung, but only because of the temperature difference. Placing her under the spray, he tried to remove her layers of clothes but as they were soaked with water, it was a struggle.
Gage fell to his knees beside the shower. “Let me help.”
