by L E Royal
“Fuck me…Mistress.”
The last word was a whisper. Her eyes were round and kissed with the first wetness of tears. Something shot through me and I almost moaned at the feeling. I jerked my hips forward, bumping the head of the toy against her, and heard the breath rushing out of her lungs.
“Again.”
I rubbed her slowly, pushing the toy along sensitive flesh but not inside.
She whined softly, the first beautiful note in a symphony I had somehow suddenly learned to conduct.
“Just…fuck me? Please?”
She was almost begging, her eyes dark but soft and her hips twitching.
I laughed, slicking my tongue over my lips because I longed to taste her like this, but first, I wanted to hear her say it.
I pinched her hip hard and she moaned long and loud, grinding down against the toy, almost enough to push it inside her before I moved back.
“Scarlett.” Her name was heroin on my tongue. “Lie still, look me in the eyes and ask me for what you need.”
She hated that word, need; I could feel her objection to it choking me, but now, like this, she did need me. And as quick as the fire came, it died, and she was still beneath me, breathing hard for five long seconds into the silence.
“Please, fuck me…”
I pushed the tip of it into her before I pulled it out. Her head was thrown back, a sound lost between pain and pleasure leaving her lips as I watched her stomach muscles clench, still rubbing her slowly.
When she looked back at me the eye contact was electric, and I could already taste the high of my victory.
“Fuck me…Mistress.”
I was on her within a second, kissing her mouth, her tear-damp cheeks, and rocking my hips into her over and over and over.
My mouth moved against her ear as her nails clawed at my back, and I listened to my own voice telling her I loved her, telling her that she was mine, and I felt the words echo, engraving themselves on my soul.
She went rigid underneath me, and then her body was slack. I shoved a hand down between us and carried on, rubbing her and moving over her until she came for me again and then again, and finally, I was too exhausted to carry on.
I tried to shimmy out of the harness, but gave up, collapsing half on top of her as she clung to me.
Her cool fingers struggled with the straps. She was still shaking as I buried my face in her neck. She finally got the thing off me and wrapped her arms around me tight. We clung to each other and I loved her. As much as I wasn’t ready to process so many things that had happened, so much of what she had done, she was small against me, soft and open, and she was everything.
She turned my bloody wrist over and rubbed her own against it. I knew when she was done we would both be healed and only I would keep my scar.
Her fingers were soft through my hair, as sleep came to take me. The last thing I heard was her whispered apology.
I WOKE UP stiff and sore, blinding white light streaming in through the balcony doors. I looked to my left, and Scarlett blinked back at me with wary dark eyes. Her face was still bloody. The events of the previous night rushed back to me, a horror reel: Hannah and her screaming and blood on the snow. The memory spilled into something darker, something more erotic, as I recounted Scarlett’s oddly colored eyes swirling like galaxies, looking up at me, and please, Mistress.
I was slightly embarrassed but strangely unashamed. I knew we had so much to talk about, so much to work through, but more than anything I wanted to know where Scarlett was at.
“You okay?”
My voice was scratchy with sleep and I cleared my throat, sure I looked positively terrible with my sex-ruffled hair and the blood still caked on my chin, a mixture of hers and mine. Scarlett was a vision, as always, dark hair and tan skin and the aloofness she wore almost constantly.
“Are you?”
I nodded, and she relaxed against the pillows slightly.
“Shower?” I questioned tentatively, as I reached for her at the same time. I tasted a little of her mood, careful, pensive, before it shimmered away, and she was pulling me to my feet. I followed her, unbothered by my nakedness, and waited patiently while she shed her remaining clothes and stepped under the hot spray.
The water ran pink. The blood faded from her face and she reached up to wipe the last of it away. She stepped into me and we ended up hugging, my chin on her shoulder, her body small against me, bare in every sense, and I knew this was our healing.
Finally, we parted, and I watched her through the steam, missing her cool body against the heat of the water, as she washed her hair. Free of makeup, free of pretense, she was the woman I loved. Last night had driven me deeper, forcing me to confront the side of her I hated. She turned to wash her front under the water, and I studied the thick scars she used to be so secretive about. They were displayed to me now in a move that had become easy, where once this kind of vulnerability was earth-shatteringly hard for her.
I thought of Wilfred Pearce and what he had done, how he had twisted her and who she might have been before him, without him. He was a distant specter, hovering near but far, and I knew eventually he would make his presence felt again in our lives. I knew Scarlett feared that day even more than I did.
She was soft like this, small and battle-scarred, I thought, but something dark lived inside her, something sadistic and power hungry, something that had been there too long, or she loved too much, to ever eke out. Like most creatures she craved love and acceptance, and I knew I succeeded in providing her with only one of the two. Flawed as I was, she loved me unconditionally and without restraint.
Last night had been a bloody, filthy romp through the world in her shoes, a taste of the darkness out of her mouth, and with it had come a new understanding. I could understand that she was trained, abused, brainwashed to become an enforcer for the Government. I could even understand that over many years, my lifetime multiple times over, she had learned to enjoy the role. The broken had become the breaker, and she was committed to never going back. As much as it made me feel guilty, dirty, from the very first night she had appeared in my life, I had been drawn to her dark side as much as her light. A moth to her flame, a lamb to her lion, because split bare, with caked blood under her nails and death in her eyes, she was a force of nature. I’d never thought to run, just hoped I’d be lucky enough to have her crash over me, and she had.
I loved all of her, but I didn’t think I could ever accept what she did, maybe because of my own personal guilt, maybe because of my morals. I would never watch her hurt people with pride, or affection, yet that was exactly what she had been trained to do. It was how she had lived for so long, one of the main ways she gained approval from her father, and society.
She turned to me with water dripping from her thick dark lashes, looking innocent, washed clean of her sins from the previous night.
I let her switch our positions, my hands resting easily on her cool hips while she washed my hair, rubbed the last of her blood from my face. When she kissed me, I let myself float away from the questions, from my worries, and met her halfway down our connection, warm and soft and unusually shy in the face of our mutual feelings.
She pushed me against the cold tile of the wall, but made love to me gently, kissing the echoes of the previous night from my skin, righting the balance of our relationship though I knew something had shifted irrevocably.
We didn’t talk, we just felt. Being close to her soothed me, left me breathing easier as I followed her through the motions of dressing, letting her kiss my cheek, running my fingers through her still wet hair, before we made our way out into the hall on our way to breakfast.
Jade looked up from the bar in the kitchen, a tall glass of orange juice in front of her untouched, her skin paler than usual, heavy circles under her eyes tinged red.
Scarlett moved to the refrigerator. Guessing she was making breakfast today, I sat down beside Jade, muttering a quiet good morning.
“You look terrible
, when was the last time?” Scarlett demanded without looking up.
Jade let her head fall onto one arm that rested on the counter.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
Scarlett cracked eggs into a pan, and I watched the exchange between the sisters with interest, glad they were finally communicating.
“Well, we can talk about it or we could talk about what you and Rayne were doing in the Fringe last night.”
I groaned inwardly. I had been so sure Scarlett hadn’t noticed Jade before I sent her away.
“I took some medicine to my friend, Zoe. Her sister is sick—not the one you left mauled in the snow, the younger one.”
There was a trace of confrontation in my voice I hadn’t meant to put there. It was a discussion I had hoped to avoid, at least until after breakfast, still content with the glow of the shower in my system, but I was loath to let Jade take the heat for what had essentially been my idea.
The eggs sizzled in the pan, and Scarlett turned from them momentarily, no doubt surprised by my interruption, though she let it pass.
“So when did you last drink, Jade?”
Finally, her earlier question made sense.
“I’m fine, Scarlett, please…”
Jade did sound sick, and as much as I understood her reluctance, I began to worry for her too. I had noticed she was pale last night, but preoccupied with our mission, and the fallout when it all went to hell, I hadn’t thought much of it.
“How often do you guys usually have to um…drink?”
Scarlett snickered, and Jade thumped her head on her arm, mumbling something under her breath.
“It’s different for everyone, Princess. For pleasure, often, for sustenance, very little. Jade gets by on about once every few months, though she is an extreme example.”
“And what about you?”
She drank from me a few times a week, but I was suddenly insecure that she was also getting blood elsewhere, and somewhat confused by my own jealousy over the thought.
Scarlett flipped the eggs onto the plate and the toaster popped. A second later I jumped as a plate was set down before me, and one before Jade, then Scarlett was leaning against the counter, amusement in her eyes as she studied me.
“Every few weeks, but again, I’m an extreme example, opposite end of the spectrum though.” I knew she’d felt my jealousy. I forced myself to hold her eyes. Her fondness for me washed over me.
For a moment I tried to do the math, tried to work out how many humans per year it would take to sustain the vampires of Vires, knowing each one except myself was killed after they served their purpose. I didn’t even know where to start.
Finally, her dark eyes let me go and she turned back to her sister.
“We can start doing the dispenser in the fridge again if you like, I’ll buy you another sippy cup, but you know eventually you’re going to have to drink something publicly, even if you can’t handle the cleanup when you’re done.”
Her voice wasn’t unkind, it was matter of fact, and I was surprised again by how easily she talked about life or death, about killing someone. In moments like this I was reminded we were a different species entirely.
“Why does she have to do it publicly?”
I was curious.
“It looks bad for me to be bringing her blood. Drinking is one of our basest requirements and instincts. People will talk, eventually the Government will notice, and the last thing we need is more involvement from them right now.”
I glanced at Jade. Her eyes were still closed, head still resting on her arm, and she was apparently ignoring her sister’s words, and her breakfast.
“Who even are the Government, and why do they matter so much?”
It was a question that had never occurred to me, but now I wanted to know. In the real world, my world, the system of law and order, of government, it made some sense. There were standards and consequences, but here, I only saw standards. Scarlett had overpowered large groups of Government guards on multiple occasions, and I wondered what consequences they could offer to her as the strongest vampire I’d ever met or heard of. Jade coughed beside me, uncomfortably.
“Jade can explain it better. Eat your eggs.”
With a wink that killed my appetite for food and replaced it with something else entirely, Scarlett went back to cleaning the stove. I studied the backs of her bare legs, visible below the sinfully short shorts she had chosen to wear today while we were at home. She was playful, content, which was the last thing I’d expected this morning after my using our being blood bound to stop her from hurting Hannah last night, plus the recent reveal that she knew Jade had been in the Fringe with me and we’d been taking medicine to the humans. The sex had been fantastic, though. I smiled to myself, stabbing some eggs.
“No one really knows who the Government are. We sort of lost track over the years.”
Jade finally raised her head, and although she still looked unwell, she seemed revived by the chance to talk about something she was clearly interested or at least had some knowledge about.
“There’s six positions on the council, and basically the story is that not long after the city was formed these six vampires gave up everything. Like, their families, their life outside the tower, everything, to become the leaders of society. The idea was that by giving it up they could be impartial, and not have their views tainted. They would be purists, if you will, single-mindedly guiding us all on the best course of action for the city, and for us as a species.”
She rolled her eyes at the last part.
“Why does anyone even obey them?”
Scarlett scoffed but carried on cleaning the stove, not even turning around though Jade and I both studied her back.
“To start, they have the numbers. Almost all the vampires in the Midlands work stints for them as guards, then there’s a number of prominent Delta vampires who also work for them. And there’s Scarlett.”
Jade looked as uncomfortable saying it as I was to hear it.
“So, if another vampire breaks the rules….”
“Most cases the penalty is more reasonable: fines, confinement in the bunker, sometimes doing tasks for the government or helping them accomplish a certain goal. There’s no book of play, no hard list of sentences for each crime, it’s all at their discretion, and that’s where it gets so hard.”
“They’re everywhere, sweetheart.” Scarlett cut in. “They control everyone and everything in this city, right down to the eggs on your plate.”
“But you’ve overpowered groups of their guards multiple times.” I spoke my earlier observation aloud.
“I’m a special scenario, but not unique. There’s always more guards, more pawns to die for them, but why bother? They snatch you or Jade, hell, even Camilla, and I’m their willing puppet. They’ve been playing the game too long not to know how to win.”
The thought made me uneasy.
“But nobody knows who they are?”
Both sisters shook their head.
“So, I’m going to be a vampire then…”
I searched Scarlett’s eyes, uncertainty and a new wave of fear washing over me as, for the first time, it started to sink in that my life as a human would soon be over.
She looked back at me, cool and hard, and for a moment I felt her wish to ease my fears, to comfort me, before our connection blinked out.
“What makes you say that?”
“You just said it’s impossible to win.”
“I said they know how to win, I never said it was impossible to beat them.”
I looked to Jade when Scarlett glanced away, and Jade shrugged, before she turned to her sister.
“Scar, how exactly are you thinking you can avoid turning her? I love Rayne, and I don’t want Daddy…messing with her either, but I don’t see how we have a choice. The whole city knows.”
Though I couldn’t feel her emotions, I knew Scarlett was slipping into that dark and brooding place she often went when we lay together at nigh
t and she thought I was sleeping.
“She’s probably right. I don’t want you to get hurt for me, and I don’t want to be something for the world to use to control you.”
Jade flinched beside me and wished I had been more tactful.
“You’ll be that either way, Princess.” She ground out the words. “I love you, and here that’s nothing but another weakness to be exploited, a hand to be played and taken advantage of.”
Definitely dark and broody.
“I’m just trying to say I can handle it, your father and the Government. I don’t want you driving yourself crazy or doing anything stupid trying to fight something if it’s inevitable.”
Despite my words I wasn’t strictly sure I was 100 percent ready to say goodbye to my human life completely. The reality of being a vampire, of having to drink from people, kill people, still tormented me, though I was finally beginning to accept it as my fate. I wouldn’t let Scarlett destroy herself trying fruitlessly to save me.
“Maybe it would be easier?” I suggested gently.
“No.” Her dark eyes burned mine, and I felt it all in that moment: her fear, her repulsion at the idea, the call in her blood and her willingness to wage a war to save me.
“Scarlett, you said yourself the Government rarely loses. How much are you willing to lose to try and stop this? You know they won’t end at just hurting you if you disobey them,” Jade chimed in, tentatively.
“If I can’t beat the Government, I’ll just have to take them down.”
It was sweet treason on her tongue, the first clean breath of air in months as her scheme was finally uncovered. I felt everything she felt, her elation at finally having a solution, the thrill of the destruction she had to bring, and the absolute terror this kind of revolt inspired in her.
“I don’t want you to fight a war for me.” I shot off my stool, the metal feet screeching violently against the smooth tile. Jade jumped beside me at the volume, her juice sloshing over the sides of the glass and spilling on the counter.
“I don’t want to be a vampire, but I don’t want to lose you. I can’t lose you, or see you get hurt because you’re trying to save me. Turning me is the easier alternative.”
