The Truths We Told

by Blair, E. K.

  He knows I’m often at a loss when it comes to expressing my feelings, but I think he knows. After he slides out of me and we pull our pants back on, I’m still unsettled in my thoughts because he deserves to hear them, to know where my heart is, even though it isn’t easy for me to say. Leaning against the stacks, I rest in the comfort of his arms, and he senses my timidity.

  “Are you okay?”

  Turning to face him, I struggle to gather my thoughts.

  “What is it?” he questions as he tucks my hair behind my ear.

  “I love you.”

  “I love you too.”

  Dropping my head, I muster a bit of courage and reveal, “Before you, I was constantly chasing after approval, thinking all along I was in love, but I wasn’t.” He runs his hand along the side of my face when I tell him, “I never knew love until you.” My eyes fall from his when I shamefully admit, “You give me so much that I sometimes feel like I’m not enough for you.”

  “You don’t have to chase after anything with me. You’re more than enough. You’re everything.”

  KATE

  I begin to stir when I sense the car slowing. The bright sun pierces my eyes, forcing me to squint until they adjust to the bright light.

  “You’re two for two,” Trent says from behind the wheel.

  I release a heavy yawn. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Second time I’ve brought you to Tampa where you’ve slept nearly the whole drive.”

  “Road trips make me tired.”

  “Weak.”

  Looking out my window, I watch the scenery pass as we draw closer to Trent’s house. We decided to come for fall break. When his mom asked Trent about his “friend”—meaning me—he finally let her know that we’re dating, and she insisted he bring me along for the extended weekend. Trent’s older brother, Garrett, is going to be there as well.

  When we pull into the wraparound drive, Trent parks behind a white car covered almost entirely with love bugs. “That must be Garrett’s rental.”

  “Oh, my god, that’s a lot of bugs.”

  “They must be foaming at the dick to be going at it this late into October.”

  Trent hops out, but I stay put because these tiny creatures are flying everywhere, a crap-ton more than usual.

  “You getting out?” he asks when he knocks on my window.

  “Dude, there’s got to be a million of them out here.”

  “They’re too busy raw doggin’ it to mess with you,” he says. “Come on; they’re harmless.”

  As I prepare to make my mad dash inside the house, they begin to accumulate on the windshield. “Gross,” I shudder before opening the door and hauling ass to the front door, only to find that it’s locked. “Open it!”

  “Chill out,” he says as he casually strides up.

  Flailing my hands to keep the swarm of bugs away, I snap at him once more, screeching, “Hurry up!”

  The second the door opens, I dart inside and frantically run my hands through my hair, hoping none got tangled up in it, while Trent stands there laughing at me.

  “Hey, dick trickle, what the hell took you so long?” a guy calls out as he walks toward us. He’s basically a slightly older version of Trent with blue eyes and shorter hair, and while I’ve seen pictures of him and know that he’s Trent’s brother, I haven’t actually met him yet.

  “Suck it, rat bitch,” Trent shoots back as the two of them go in for a hug, patting each other on the backs. “When did you get here?”

  “A few hours ago. I’ve been jacking the beanstalk waiting for you.”

  Watching them interact is like watching two apples fall from the tree and land in the same damn spot.

  Garrett pushes Trent aside and approaches me with a smirk. “You must be Kate.”

  “Hey.”

  “Pardon my good graces, but what the fuck are you doing with this fuggnut?”

  “Eat dick,” Trent says, which earns him a wink from his brother.

  “Great, there are two of you,” I joke with a straight face.

  Garrett drapes his arm around my shoulders and begins leading me toward the back of the house. “Let me give you the grand tour.”

  “She’s already been here, man,” Trent says from behind as he grabs our bags and takes them up to his room.

  Garrett doesn’t acknowledge him at all as we continue our stroll into the living room.

  “So, where did you fly in from?” I ask as I duck out from under his arm and take a seat on the couch.

  “Los Angeles.” He sits in the chair adjacent to me.

  “Oh, I thought you were in Pennsylvania.”

  “I went to college there, but I moved out to California last year after I graduated.”

  “What do you do in out in California?”

  “I work as a film editor.”

  “Oh, wow. That’s cool,” I note, having a vague idea of what that actually entails. “What type of films?”

  “Right now, a bunch of seasonal movies.”

  “Tell her the truth,” Trent says when he joins us.

  Turning back to Garrett, I watch him flip his brother off.

  “Garrett works for one of those networks that make cheesy-as-fuck movies for middle-aged housewives,” he tells me before looking over at his older brother. “Isn’t that right, Mr. Hollywood.”

  “Jobs are hard to come by. It was either that or porn.”

  “Damn, dude, you turned down porn for that shit? You really are a loser.”

  “Suck it.”

  “I’ll pass.”

  Garrett shakes his head and turns to me. “So, what are you planning to do after college? Hopefully, you have bigger aspirations than this dipshit.”

  “I’m hoping to score a job at a PR firm in Miami.”

  “What kind of PR?”

  “I’d like to get into club promotions,” I tell him.

  “Party girl?”

  “Might as well have fun while you’re working, right?”

  “I’m home,” their mother calls out when we hear the front door close. She walks into the room, saying, “Sorry I’m late. All the appointments ran over, and I couldn’t catch up for the life of me.”

  I watch her eyes soften at her boys as she comes in with her arms outstretched.

  “It only ever feels like home when I have both of you here,” she croons as she gives Garrett a big hug before smothering Trent in affection. After she’s done doting on the two grown men, she turns to me with an endearing smile. “And you,” she says, “I couldn’t be happier to have you here.”

  I get off the couch, and she gives me a warm embrace.

  “I never thought I’d see the day when Trent would have a girlfriend.”

  “Mom, really?”

  She pulls back and smiles at me before telling him, “Oh, stop. Let me have my moment.”

  “It’s good to see you again.”

  “Well, I hate to rush, but we have dinner reservations in an hour, and I need to get cleaned up,” she says.

  “Reservations?” Garrett groans.

  “Yes. And if it isn’t too painful, can you please ditch the flip-flops for one night?”

  “Where are we going?”

  “Bern’s.”

  “Are you serious?” Trent complains. “That place is douchy.”

  “Jack made the reservations, so be nice,” she scolds lightly before heading to her room, announcing, “Be ready to leave by seven.”

  I turn to Trent just in time to see him motioning a hand job before asking his brother, “You know anything about this dude?”

  “Nah, man. I didn’t even know she was seeing anyone until she mentioned it the other week.”

  They both look annoyed, but I ignore them as I walk out of the room and catch up to Laura. “I hope this doesn’t sound weird, but I didn’t pack anything for a nice dinner.”

  “No worries,” she says as she leads me into her closet. “Feel free to borrow anything you want.”

  “You
’re a lifesaver.”

  She helps me pick out a long maxi dress that I can easily glam up with the right hair and makeup. I thank her once more before going up to Trent’s room. After a quick shower, I take my time getting ready, and when seven o’clock hits, we’re all out the door. We decide to take two cars in case we want to go out afterward.

  It’s a short drive to the upscale steakhouse, and when we walk in, the hostess immediately leads us to our table where a gentleman with flakes of gray in his hair is already seated.

  He stands when we approach and greets Laura with a kiss to her cheek before he introduces himself to Trent and Garrett and shakes their hands.

  “It’s nice to meet you,” I say when he leans in to kiss my cheek, and finally we all take our seats. When the waitress stops by, we place our drink orders and then look at the menu.

  “It’s nice to finally meet you boys,” Jack says. “Your mother has told me so much about you.”

  “Odd, she hasn’t told us anything about you,” Garrett responds.

  She picks up her water goblet and takes a sip. “It’s been a little bit of a whirlwind.”

  “How did you two even meet?” he questions.

  “Your mother came in for a root canal a few months ago.”

  “He’s an oral surgeon,” she boasts with a smile, and it’s obvious she’s crazy about him.

  The waitress delivers our drinks, and Trent takes a long sip from his beer.

  Jack goes on to tell them the whole story, laughing when he talks about how loopy she was from the anesthesia and how he had one of his techs schedule her for a fake follow-up just so he could ask her out on a date. Trent is unusually quiet, but both he and his brother are respectful.

  As the evening progresses, Laura gushes to Jack about her sons and how proud she is of them. Everything, aside from Trent being so reserved, is going smoothly, and when we are in the middle of our dinner, Laura sets down her fork, garnering everyone’s attention. “I actually have something to tell you.” She looks over at Jack, adding, “We both do.”

  I notice the tension in Trent as he chews a piece of steak.

  “We’re getting married.” She beams before turning to Jack and pecking him on the lips.

  “What?” Trent questions, his tone a tad too harsh. “When did this happen?”

  “Last month. I’ve been waiting to get both of you here at the same time so I could tell you in person.”

  “You just met.”

  His mother reaches across the table and rests her hand on top of Trent’s while looking at Jack, explaining, “Trent has always been a little protective over me.”

  Annoyance blooms in his eyes as he turns them on Jack. “What do you even know about my mom?”

  “I know that she’s a hard worker and that she loves you boys.” He looks to Laura and adds, “She’s caring, vibrant, and the best thing that’s ever come into my life.”

  The clanking of Trent’s steak knife dropping onto his plate causes me to jump. “You’re seriously getting married again?”

  “This time is different.”

  He nods slowly, not buying it at all.

  “Your mother was a little hesitant to tell you boys—”

  “I can’t imagine why.”

  “Trent,” his mother scolds, but she doesn’t see the pain beneath the glare he serves her.

  In an attempt to break the tension, Garrett raises his beer. “Congratulations. So, when is this going down?”

  His mother’s face softens, but Trent remains agitated.

  “February,” she says. “We thought something intimate at the Davis Island Garden Club would be nice.”

  Under the table, I lay my hand on Trent’s knee, which is bouncing up and down. It has to be alarming to know that she’ll be getting married in four months to a guy she barely knows. I give him a gentle squeeze to soothe his unease, but it does nothing. He doesn’t attempt to make an uncomfortable situation worse or better. He just shuts down as Garrett and I make our best effort to distract the happy couple from his irritation.

  When dinner is finally over and we part ways, Trent scraps whatever plans he had for the night and takes us back home with Garrett in the back seat. He remains shut down, not saying a word for the five minutes it takes us to pull into the drive.

  “You okay?” Garrett asks him as we get out and head inside.

  “Shit’s fucked up,” is the only response he gives before heading straight upstairs, leaving me behind with Garrett.

  “I’m sorry,” I say, unsure of what exactly I’m apologizing for.

  “I’ve grown immune to it all. It’s always been hardest on Trent,” he tells me. “I’d give him a few minutes.”

  I nod as he walks away, and I busy myself in the kitchen, getting something to drink before heading up to Trent.

  I find him lying on the bed, staring up at the ceiling and sit next to him.

  “You okay?” I ask cautiously, unsure of what to expect because I’ve never seen him upset like this.

  “Six times.” He releases a heavy sigh. “It’s bullshit.”

  When I run my hand down his arm, he finally turns his head to look at me.

  “I can’t even count the number of guys she has dated since her last divorce. She doesn’t know how to be alone.”

  “She seems happy,” I say, trying to be optimistic because I really like Laura.

  “It’ll never last.” He sits up and leans against the headboard. “She always jumps into a relationship, thinking it’s love, only for them to fail. Then she depends on me to help clean up the mess.” His head drops, and I can feel the turmoil when he admits thickly, “I love her, but she’s so damn selfish.”

  Scooting in, I slip my arms around him, and I’m surprised when he hangs on to me tightly, as if he’s desperate for consolation. I have to wonder if there was anyone around to give him this when he was growing up, but my gut is telling that he was probably alone.

  “It scares me.”

  Loosening my hold, I sit back and wait until he looks at me. “What does?”

  “This,” he admits. “All I’ve ever seen is one failed relationship after another.”

  “Do you doubt yourself with me?”

  “I don’t want to.”

  “But do you?”

  He drags his thumb along the crest of my cheek, admitting, “Sometimes.”

  I lean in and fold myself against him when he gathers me in his arms.

  “No one has ever been able to love me like you do,” I tell him, needing him to know. “I hate that you doubt yourself when I don’t doubt you at all.”

  He pushes his hands through my hair, but it brings upon guilt because he’s always doing this—tiny gestures that comfort me when it should be me giving it in return.

  I take his hand, pulling it away from stroking me, and lace my fingers with his. “Her lot in life doesn’t have to be yours.”

  His eyes peer into mine, and he lets a span of time pass before he says, “I’m angry at her. It feels wrong to say it, but I am.”

  “You have every right to feel that way; she’s disappointed you.”

  He nods and takes a hard swallow. Another quiet moment passes before he continues, “Growing up, it felt like I was in the background. I was constantly wishing for it to just be the three of us, that she would stop bringing men home, and that she would make me a priority . . . it sounds really selfish.”

  “It isn’t selfish. It’s what every kid wants—to feel important,” I tell him, feeling as if I’ve been taking for granted the very thing he’s wished for but was neglected of.

  From what I’ve seen, which I admit isn’t much, it’s as if his mother comes around more when her world is falling apart. And he’s right, she does depend on him to pick up the pieces. But when things are going well for her, she’s absent from his life, rarely even calling to check in.

  “It worries me that I don’t know this guy, that I no longer live here to keep an eye on her to make sure everything’s okay
.”

  “You can’t always protect people; you can’t put that kind of responsibility on your shoulders.”

  “I’ve spent my whole life constantly waiting for shit to hit the fan because it always does. The moment things smooth out and everything seems right again, it never fails to fall apart.”

  “But it isn’t your job to keep it all together.”

  With a long exhale, he tilts his head back, resting it against the headboard. There’s so much strife he keeps bottled up, and it hurts me to see him like this. If words could soothe, I’d hand them right over, but they are nothing but a temporary medicine.

  “You ever feel like an outcast?”

  His question catches me off guard because he’s far from an outcast. He’s the life of every party and has more friends than I can keep track of. Now he has me wondering if he uses those things as a mask to shield himself, to overcompensate for what he’s been lacking. I know all too well what it’s like to be surrounded by a ton of people and feel all alone—invisible almost—misplaced.

  Leaning in, I press my lips to the thumping of his pulse on his neck, and when he looks down at me, I respond, “All the time.”

  He threads his hand through my hair, and I reach up to do the same. It’s a tender moment that has my love for him expanding boundlessly, floating as if gravity were just a mere illusion—a phantasmal obscurity that only we are able to see beyond.

  “I love you,” I whisper, but it isn’t enough. “I mean, I really love you, and I don’t want those words to lay on your surface with all the other words you’ve been told. I want them to sink in, fade into you, and rest in your bones.”

  His lips fall onto mine in an unmoving kiss, the warmth of his touch seeping into me, and when he pulls back an inch, his breath feathers against me when he murmurs, “God, I love you. You’re the truest thing I’ve ever known in this fake as fuck world.”

  KATE

  “You almost ready?” Trent questions as I tie my hair up.

  “Yeah.”

  “Brogan just texted, he’s pulling in now, so I’m going to go load up the jet skis.”

  “Okay, I’ll be down in a second.”

  Walking out of the bathroom, I pull a pair of shorts from my suitcase and put them on over my bikini before grabbing Trent’s backpack he left on the bed. As I leave the room, I swipe my sunglasses off the dresser and head downstairs to toss a few drinks into the bag.