My dad’s voice was frustrated. “Ariel, please tell me you aren’t sleeping with Derek Prince behind Ursula Jones’s back.”
“Whatever you’re thinking, it’s not like that at all,” I told him. “Really. The whole thing about them being engaged is just a publicity stunt. They aren’t really even together. They don’t even like each other.”
“Ariel, please don’t be naïve,” my dad said, forming the words as clearly and slowly as one would when talking to a small child. “You can’t believe anything a man like that says to you. Isn’t Derek Prince the guy you had the poster of in your bedroom in high school?”
“Yeah,” I admitted. “But that’s beside the point.”
“It helps explain why you wouldn’t be able to see the truth.”
“This is the truth,” I told him, feeling frustrated that he thought me so foolish. “I’m not some homewrecker here. He cares about me and I care about him and—”
He cut me off. “And you’re going to get married and have babies and live in a big mansion with a big white picket fence and there are going to be ponies that live in the yard. No, not ponies. Unicorns! And you and Derek will ride the unicorns with your babies all day long. Ariel, stop dreaming.”
“It’s not like you think it is!” I told him. “This is why I don’t tell you stuff, you know that, right? This is why I keep things to myself.”
“Ariel, I love you, but you need to come home,” my dad said. “I know this is hard to hear, but you’ve been manipulated and it’s bad. Derek Prince isn’t in love with you.”
“Why would you say that?” I hissed. Why would he say something so cruel to me? He didn’t know.
“Because it’s the truth,” he said. “And sometimes the truth is painful. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t face it.”
“You don’t have any proof of what you’re saying.” I swallowed a huge lump in the back of my throat. It wasn’t true. It couldn’t be.
“Neither do you. Has he told you that he loves you?” he asked. His voice was soft.
“Yes.”
“Does he take you out in public? Does he introduce you to his friends? His family?”
“No, but—”
His laugh was sad. “Ariel, think about it for a moment. Be rational. Why would he pretend to love Ursula?”
“Because… because he’s being blackmailed into it. It benefits her career. See, it started out as a studio plot. The studio was trying to set them up together to help promote the film. But Derek left a date that he was on with Ursula to come see me. This paparazzo lady, Meg, she got a picture of us kissing. Then Ursula made Derek pretend to be in love with her to keep it out of the news because it made Derek look bad. And Ursula wanted the publicity of being in a relationship with Derek for the same reason the studio wanted it. So, they’re pretending to be together. He got engaged to her for the same reason.”
“You actually believe that crazy story?” My dad asked. “Ariel, I know that you are smarter than this. In fact, I know you’re a lot smarter than this. Please, see reason here...”
“It’s true,” I protested. “I know it sounds ridiculous, but it’s true.”
“Do you have any proof? Has Ursula told you that the relationship is fake?”
“Derek told me they cooked up the plot together.”
“That’s it?” he asked. “That’s all you’ve got?”
“I trust him,” I said stubbornly. He loved me. He said he did. I believed him.
“Ariel, you shouldn’t. Men like that sleep with a lot of women. And sometimes they tell them whatever they want to hear in order to do it.”
“You sound just like her!”
“Who?” my dad asked, disconcerted.
“Ursula. She’s been messing with my head this whole time. Gaslighting me. She said that Derek was spreading rumors about me on set about being easy. Trying to make me believe that I’m the one who’s being crazy for continuing to see him. Like I’m the side chick.”
“What’s a… side chick?” I was not surprised my dad had never heard the term. He wasn’t a divorce attorney.
“Exactly what it sounds like. It’s the chick who a guy is seeing on the side, in secret.”
My dad was quiet for a few moments. “Ariel, I think you are the, um, side chick in this situation. In fact, that’s exactly what you are. I want you to think back, think through every interaction you’ve had with Derek. Try to make the pieces fit the other way. I think you’ll find that I’m right.”
“No. I—I need to go.”
My head was starting to hurt, and I didn’t know what to do.
“When you come to your senses, I’m here for you. I love you.”
For some reason, it was hearing him say that he loved me that made me start to cry.
36
Ariel
“What’s wrong?” Sebastian asked the next afternoon when I reported in to work at the bar looking probably just about as good as I felt. I’d been up all night. I felt like death warmed over.
I shrugged my shoulders. “This working two jobs thing is getting pretty difficult,” I lied, not wanting to get into the real source of my angst. “I think it’s just too much for a person to do.”
“Do you need me to call in someone else?” he asked, pressing a hand to my forehead like I was a feverish child. “You aren’t feeling good?”
I shook my head, pulling away from his palm. “No, no. I’m fine. I’m just ready for this production to wrap.”
“You know what would make you feel better?” Sebastian asked.
I raised an eyebrow. “Beer?”
He laughed at me, shaking his head.
“You know what would make you feel better that you can still do while working?” he tried.
“What?” I asked reluctantly. Honestly a beer had sounded pretty good right about now.
“Go sing a song,” he suggested.
I frowned and sighed. “No thanks.”
He gaped at me. I never turned down the opportunity to perform. Not ever. Usually he had to keep me off the stage. I’d been a ham since the day I was born. “Oh, don’t give me that ‘no thanks’ nonsense. It’s been weeks since you sang something here at the bar. I know you’ve been busy singing in the studio, but we’ve been deprived of your talents around here.”
I looked up at him churlishly. “You just want me to be in a better mood.”
“Applause will put you in a better mood, sure, but I also just like to hear you sing,” he told me.
I shuffled around the bar, messing with the cups and pretending to work. “Maybe later.”
“Come on.”
I sighed. “Alright. Fine. I’ll sing. What do you want to hear?”
Sebastian shrugged. He’d recently lost his earring to a thieving Flapper and he looked strange without it. It would turn up eventually. “Something upbeat.”
“Okay.” I didn’t feel upbeat at the moment. Far from it. But I went around back to look at the catalogue anyway.
Upbeat… I needed something upbeat. Sebastian wanted something happy. I browsed through the songs, feeling like I could crawl under a rock and sleep for a week. None of the choices seemed right.
Happy by Pharrell Williams was popular these days. Eh, it didn’t feel right. I wasn’t feeling peppy enough.
I’m a Believer by the Monkees? No thanks. Not tonight. Too repetitive.
I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor? Great song, but it didn’t resonate right now. I didn’t feel like much of a survivor.
Good Vibrations by the Beach Boys? It was happy, but damn near impossible to sing. Brian Wilson clearly hadn’t written his songs with karaoke in mind.
Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries, by Judy Garland. Hmm. Closer.
Girls Just Wanna’ Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper. I did like that song. But it wasn’t quite on target. Maybe if I slowed it way down and made it depressing. But that would just confuse people.
Eventually, I saw it. Get Happy/Happy Days Are Here Again, the duet between Barbar
a Streisand and Judy Garland. Perhaps the saddest song about happiness that had ever been arranged. It was perfect. I set the duet to let me sing Judy Garland’s part and got situated on the stage.
The lyrics were happy enough, but the arrangement was simply heart breaking. It was a song that was meant to be sung wearing a black dress and a funeral veil. It could bring a whole room of people to tears. I belted out the song with Barbara, looking out into the audience and feeling utterly empty. I put all my emotion into my voice, all the insecurity. The fear. The little doubts that had been growing and festering over the past twenty-four hours. It flowed out of me on the melody, leaving me lighter but hollow.
While I was singing, I felt like everything was clear. The feelings that had been swirling inside me and attempting to overtake me subsided. The song made sense. So long as I had the melody to sustain me, I didn’t have to think. I just needed to sell this song to the people in front of me. And they watched, spellbound. It felt so good to have them listening to me.
It might not have been the most uplifting, but the standing ovation I got afterwards at least got butts out of seats. I smiled and took a bow, soaking up the applause and hoping it would fill me back up. It didn’t. I returned behind the bar, looking over at Sebastian who raised an eyebrow. I shrugged. I didn’t have anything to say.
Derek cancelled our date. He said he had something he had to talk to the studio about. He’d promised me that he would explain everything tomorrow, but I didn’t know if we’d have a chance to talk. It was hard on set. We couldn’t let people see us together.
I’d listened to my dad. I replayed every conversation. I tried to find proof that Derek wasn’t leading me on. I looked through my memories, watching them like a movie in my mind. And I came up wanting.
Ursula never slipped or faltered. Her act, if it was an act, was perfect. If she was really playing a game with me, then she outplayed me soundly. Because as far as I could remember, she never admitted that her relationship with Derek was anything less than real. And when I looked at the whole situation through my dad’s lens, it sure did seem like I was the side chick.
And no, Derek never took me out publicly. He never introduced me to his friends. I’d never met his family. And the worst part of it all, when I looked back on it now, was that it had been my idea.
I’d let him keep me a secret. I’d been so willing to go along with it. Because I desperately wanted to believe Derek. And I still couldn’t quite bring myself not to believe him.
But my dad was smart. He was very smart. Brilliant. For all our differences of opinion and ideas about what my life should be like, my dad wasn’t the type to actively sabotage me. He would never do that. He loved me. Was I willing to believe Derek, a man who was publicly engaged to another woman, over my own father? Wouldn’t that make me the worst daughter of all time?
I was all twisted up inside. It was making me crazy.
“Hi,” a guy said, snapping me out of my reverie. “Can I get a beer over here?”
I blinked. Oh right. I was supposed to be working. I plastered a big, happy smile on my face.
“Of course,” I said, looking at him and pretending I wasn’t festering in doubt. “What would you like?”
“What have you got on draft?” he asked.
I started rattling off the beers until he picked the one he liked. At least I could do this, I thought to myself. I can always fall back on cocktail waitressing. No matter what happened, I could still work at Sebastian’s.
“You sang pretty well up there,” the guy said to me when I delivered his beer. “Have you ever done anything professional?”
I shrugged. “No,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s just a hobby.”
A hobby. Ugh.
My dad would be so happy. I hung my head and got back to work. Maybe he was right. If Ursula had really gotten me all but blacklisted, it would probably be better for me to move back to Sacramento when the production wrapped. I wouldn’t be able to get another job. And God knew that I was almost broke. I was making just enough to keep my head above water, but it wouldn’t last.
At least I’d have a great story. I could grow up. I could go to law school. I could become a lawyer and marry some boring guy that my parents liked. Probably another lawyer. And one day when I had a daughter of my own, maybe I could show her ‘She Done Him Wrong’ and tell her that was my voice she was hearing. I could point out the little blonde in the sequined leotard in the background and say, ‘that’s me.’ And she would ask me if I knew the two people playing the leads. And I could tell her no. They’re movie stars. I was only ever just a chorus girl. I was never cut out to be a star.
37
Derek
“I don’t want to do it.” I sounded whiny and immature. I didn’t even care.
“Well, unfortunately you don’t actually have a choice.” My agent, Elaine, was frowning at me over her desk. I was here, miserably getting lectured on the requirements of the contract I signed instead of out with Ariel at a movie. Behind Elaine, the sprawling city of LA filled the picture window, displaying a whole city built on millions of movies. A whole world built on films and Elaine couldn’t get me out of my commitments on one of them.
“There’s got to be a way,” I protested. “Can we call the lawyers?”
Elaine sighed. “I already called them. We had a two-hour conference call this morning before you got here. I do my job, you know. When you said you didn’t want to do the tour, I called them up and put them through their paces. They looked at the contract and chewed on it and digested it right in front of me, for hours. And this is the final distillation of all that digestion. You’re stuck.”
“Three months?”
“I thought you’d be happy there was so much buzz around this film. I’ve been negotiating this tour on your behalf. If you’d told me you didn’t want to do it, things would be different right now. You walked right into this.”
“I can’t do it.”
“Don’t tell me you’re going to pull a Tommy, Derek.”
My brother Tommy had recently walked away from an Oscar win to go and finish his math degree. He was, in my opinion, totally and completely insane. But he was also in love. His wife was attending with him. They were having a blast.
But Elaine had not been happy. She’d invested a lot of time into Tommy. She’d invested a lot of time into me, too, as well as Connor, Holden, and Peter. The idea that I might be the second member of the Prince family to suddenly peace out on Hollywood obviously had her spooked.
I laughed at her worry, thinking that going to pursue a bachelor’s degree in anything was going to be a very hard sell for me. Tommy was the smart one. I was the fun one. And the talented one. I’d been pursuing this dream my whole life and it hadn’t lost its shine yet.
“I’m not going to pull a Tommy,” I reassured her. “Trust me, I’m still enjoying my acting career quite a bit.” That was generally true, although the last couple of weeks had been a bit bumpy. “More importantly, I really suck at math.”
“Well then suck it up,” Elaine told me. “You agreed to promote the film the way the studio saw fit. This might be a bit unusual, but it’s only because they can smell a huge hit in the making. If the buzz is to be believed, this is going to make ‘A Star is Born’ look like that horrible piece of crap that Hugh Jackman and Zack Efron put out a couple of years ago.”
I wracked my brain for the reference. “The Greatest Showman?” Yeah, it hadn’t been great. There were a few good numbers, but it hadn’t quite held together despite the combined talent of a fantastic cast.
She nodded. “That’s the one. Drivel.”
“I’m happy the film is going to be successful—” I started.
“Then you can happily promote it, right?” she replied. She looked at her watch. “Derek, this is not going to be something we can negotiate.”
“Ursula is driving me insane,” I confessed. “She’s got me over a barrel, trapped in this fake relationship with her and now w
e’re engaged and—”
Elaine’s eyes were huge. “Stop. Stop.”
“What?”
“Go back to the beginning.”
* * *
Two hours later and Elaine had cancelled her next three appointments. We’d broken open a bottle of tequila she had in her desk.
“Well, that’s quite a story,” Elaine pronounced. “I’m not sure what we can do at this point, but if you’d gotten me involved at an earlier stage, I probably could have helped quite a bit.”
“I didn’t think I needed help,” I admitted.
“Well, live and learn. You do need help.” Elaine looked exasperated. “Professional help.”
I nodded. “Yes, Elaine. Yes, I do. Can you help me?”
“We can manage the PR situation. I’ll call Ursula’s agent and have a chat with her. She’s a reasonable woman. I’m going to hope that she wasn’t involved in the blackmail thing. Probably not. It would be pretty low. If I had to guess, Ursula’s working this alone. But she’s a lot smarter than the average starlet, that’s for sure.”
“Well, she’s also got Meg Butler on her side.”
Elaine raised an eyebrow. “Meg Butler’s on her own side. As soon as Ursula stops providing her with good scoops, she’ll abandon her like a hot potato.”
“Well, the sooner the better,” I snapped, ready to have Meg Butler out of my life, permanently. The more she was interested in me, or my relationships, the worse my life had become. She was poison.
“Not necessarily. She can be useful. We need to make it so you come out looking good here. I’m not sure how we do it either, although I’ll come up with something. Temporarily, you’re going to have to keep seeing Ursula.”
“The engagement—” I stuttered.
“The engagement stays.”
“But—” I was back to being whiny.
“We can’t dissolve the engagement that easily. We keep it for now and then once the fervor subsides, we can just quietly cancel it.”
The Little Barmaid Page 17
