by Monroe, Max
And comfortable is happy…right?
The fact that you can’t immediately say yes to that question is a red fucking flag, dude.
“Look,” Lou adds after he takes a sip of coffee. “All I’m hoping is that you’ll really think about why you let that pretty girl up there come with you on this trip. And I want you to think about how she really makes you feel.”
I stare at him as he shrugs.
“You’re different with her around. Lighter. Playful. It’s a side of Luca my Shirley would’ve loved to have seen instead of a grumbly bastard. And, truthfully, it’s a side that gives me hope for you,” he says quietly. “I’m not always going to be around, and I’d hate for you to stay locked up in your wilderness tower and never actually live your life. I knew you needed the move eight years ago. I knew you needed to get away from it all, but I think you’re reaching a point in your life where you’re ready to get back out there and start living again. Really fucking living.”
I shake my head. “I think you’re taking it all a little too far. Just because I’m okay being around one pretty pain in the ass for a few days doesn’t mean I’m ready to be back out there with the rest of them,” I mutter, and Lou stands up with his now-empty cup of coffee and pats me on the back.
“Say what you want, Lucky. Everything on your face says the rest of it for you.” I narrow my eyes, and he points to something I obviously can’t see. Something I think he’s making the fuck up. “That’s it. Right there. The story’s there, written all over your face.”
Christ.
I jump up from my seat and shove in my chair. I think it’s time to get moving and head home, away from all the psychoanalysis I didn’t ask for.
“What time do you think you two are going to head out?” Lou asks from the sink, clearly recognizing my agitation for what it is.
“Hopefully before ten.”
“Remember, if you want to borrow one of the four-wheelers, you can.” A sly grin appears on his lips. “Lord knows I don’t need two of them here. And you can hook up one of my small trailers to the back for Bailey. Billie’s ankle doesn’t need to make another thirty-mile hike anyway.”
He has a point. Even though Billie managed the rest of the hike without too much trouble, there’s no doubt in my mind she’s still dealing with some discomfort.
My girl is a strong little thing.
Wait…what? My girl?
Billie is strong, but she’s not my girl. She’s not my anything.
You sure about that?
“You okay over there, Lucky?” Lou asks, and I move my eyes back to him. He stands with his hip resting against the kitchen counter, just looking at me like I’ve grown two heads.
“Just a little tired, is all. And thanks. I’m sure Billie would appreciate that.”
“Didn’t get much sleep last night?” he asks and waggles his brows.
“Jesus. You don’t give up, do you?”
He grins.
“And since you’re being such a pest, I’m taking one of the four-wheelers and a trailer, and I’m not bringing them back.”
“Whatever helps you avoid what you should be facing, Luck.” He smirks. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’ve got a tractor to piddle around with in the garage.”
The tractor he speaks of is about a hundred years old and has been broken for as long as I’ve known Lou. All rusted-out and leaking oil, it will take a damn miracle to get it working again.
“I’ll let you know when we’re getting ready to head out.”
He waves his hand over his shoulder and walks toward the garage.
And I make a fresh cup of coffee and head back upstairs.
Sleeping Beauty is still there, all sprawled out on the bed.
Fuck me. It’s almost painful how damn beautiful she is.
I sit down on the edge of the bed and set the cup of coffee on the nightstand.
“Good morning,” I say quietly, gently running my fingers down her exposed arm, and then, her exposed thigh.
Billie stirs and groans, and it only takes a little more of my pestering before her sleepy green eyes are looking back at mine.
“Hey there,” I say, but she’s too busy looking toward the nightstand.
“Is that coffee?”
“It is.”
“For me?”
I nod my head, but she sits up from the bed faster than I can get the word yes out of my mouth.
“Oh, praise Jesus,” she says, and I laugh.
“I take it coffee is a morning ritual of yours.”
“Are you kidding me?” She stares at me like I’ve just said pigs can fly. “Coffee is my everything. I drink it morning, noon, and night. I don’t know how I’ve made it through the last three days without going through withdrawals.”
“Well, by all means, take a sip and keep that caffeine addiction of yours going.”
“Thank you.” She giggles and does just that.
And my stupid eyes can’t seem to pull away from her perfect lips as they touch the cup and let the coffee flow into her mouth.
Good God, get it together.
“We’re going to need to head out soon,” I update, and she nods, her hands still firmly wrapped around the mug. “But you probably have time to take another hot shower if you want.”
She releases one hand from the cup to fist-pump the air. “Oh my stars, this day just keeps getting better and better!”
“And I have one more very important thing to tell you.”
She tilts her cute little head to the side.
“We’re going to take a different route on the way back.”
“Okay… But please tell me it isn’t a longer route…”
“It is,” I answer, and her face falls. “But that’s because we’re taking one of Lou’s four-wheelers.”
“Hold on.” She sets her coffee back on the nightstand and scoots closer to me, sitting up on her knees. “Say that one more time.”
“I know you’re probably disappointed, but we’re not hiking back. We’re taking one of Lou’s four-wheelers.”
Like a rocket, Billie dives into me so hard that I fall back onto the mattress.
But she doesn’t stop there.
With her hot, bare-of-clothes body sprawled over mine, she kisses my cheeks and my nose and my forehead, all while saying “Thank you, thank you, thank you” over and over again.
I laugh. “I had a feeling you’d like that news.”
“Are you kidding me?” She stops the kiss parade to look into my eyes. “I love that fucking news. Best news ever.”
God, she’s the best.
I can’t stop myself from placing my hands on her soft cheeks and pulling her mouth to mine for an actual kiss. Lips to hers, I kiss her for a long moment, and when the kiss eventually ends, she grins down at me.
“I take it you’re excited about the four-wheeler, too, huh?”
“Something like that.” I wink and place a teasing slap to her bare ass. “Now, if you want to take that shower, you better get a move on it.”
“Aye-aye, captain!”
Off my body in one smooth movement, Billie grabs her coffee and strides her sexy as hell naked body into the connected bathroom.
The shower water is on mere minutes later.
And I’m left lying on the mattress, tempted, so fucking tempted, to join her.
But I know we need to get a move on, and me in the shower with Billie would equate to way too much time lost.
So, I busy myself with making sure our backpacks are all packed, but when that’s done and Billie is still enjoying herself in the shower, I spot the screenplay on the nightstand and decide to take advantage of the private opportunity to get a better feel for it.
Quickly and quietly, I open up to page twenty-four and start reading again.
Billie
All that yolk I’ve been bleeding for the last week is officially scrambled. In laymen’s terms: I’m fucked up in my feelings.
We left Lou’s later than Luca wanted
, most likely because of my extra-long hot shower, but he didn’t give me any shit about it.
No rude comments. No asshole remarks.
Just a smile, some playful jokes about my contribution to Alaska’s depleting water table, and that was it.
But now we are on our way—via wheels, thank everything!
With my chest pressed against Luca’s back and my arms wrapped around his waist, he leads us on a different route than we came. A small trailer is hooked on the back, and Bailey lounges safely inside. Personally, I think he’s just as happy about the change in transportation mode as me.
The new path isn’t as rocky, but we’re still weaving in and out of the forest and the trees.
Not going to lie, the first five minutes into this drive, I was scared one of those darn branches was going to take my head off, but Luca has proven to be an expert driver, taking it slow when the path is more treacherous, and, like any man, opening up the throttle when we hit open road.
“You okay back there?” he asks, and I nod.
But then I realize he can’t see me nodding. Duh.
“I’m good!”
“We only have a little over two hours to go.”
Only two more hours.
I should be happy. Thrilled, even.
But this unknown panic starts in my belly and works its way up to my chest. I feel like the inside of my body has just developed Restless Leg Syndrome, and any moment, my organs are going to pack up their shit and find an escape route.
I try to breathe through the vibration inside of me, but my heart could give two fucks about my need for calm and jumps into a pounding rhythm.
What the hell? Why am I panicked?
I’m not flailing at the bottom of an Alaskan body of ice water, my limbs are all intact, and I haven’t seen any sign or scat from a bear at all—at least, not according to the knowledge I acquired from the book in Lou’s bathroom.
So, what is it? What has me so out of fucking sorts?
Maybe because, in two hours, you’ll be at Luca’s, and then, you’ll need to go home.
My chest grows tighter at the thought.
This, whatever the hell this is, will all be over soon.
This trip started out with him hating me for throwing a wrench in his carefully crafted solitude, and me hating me for putting myself in the position to have to. And I guess I was plenty freaking annoyed by him too.
But over time, something happened. All of those sour feelings disappeared and were replaced by something else.
Something that brought us together last night.
Something that turned into sex that felt a whole lot like more than just sex.
Luca was inside me bare, for fack’s sake! And it was one of the best things I’ve ever experienced.
Jesus. I don’t want this to end. Not yet.
“Uh, can we stop?” I ask, and he briefly glances at me over his shoulder.
“You want to stop? Is something wrong?”
Yes, I’m kind of freaking out over the idea of this trip ending because I’m obviously losing my damn mind!
“Uh…I need…” More time with you. “I need to…uh…pee.”
He nods and gives me a thumbs-up over his shoulder. “No problem. Give me a sec.”
A minute or two later, Luca pulls over, and I hop off the four-wheeler and head toward a discreet spot behind brush and trees. But I don’t pee. Instead, I just kind of stand there and try to figure out what in the hell is wrong with me.
I tell myself this is because he hasn’t finished reading the screenplay, and I don’t want to go back to LA without him actually wanting to do the movie. It’s because of my career and accountability and finding a place for myself at Koontz Productions.
It’s not at all because the thought of sleeping alone in my downtown LA apartment without a body to block the view of the strip club down below and the rugged scratch of a beard on my neck and a warm hand on my hip is downright appalling.
Nooo.
I’m an independent woman with priorities and a membership to the LA Chapter of the Future Boss Bitches of America, and there is no way I’m actually falling for the token bad boy like some kind of teenage girl in a young adult novel.
Right?
Ah God. My head is so fucked up.
“You okay?” Luca’s voice reaches my ears.
Cripes, I need to get moving or else it’ll seem like I’m over here struggling to poop or something. And I’m not. The only thing constipated is my ability to form a rational thought.
“Billie?”
“Yep! I’m good!” I yell back, and it’s so loud, my voice echoes off the trees in booming waves.
Bailey barks like a maniac in response, and I sigh.
I’m a disaster right now.
But you have to get it together.
Slowly, I make my way out of the brush and find Luca standing by the four-wheeler, and holy macaroni salad, why does he have to be so damn handsome?
I always hate when people use the word literally like it’s some kind of fun adjective to toss into a sentence. But my personal pet peeves aside, the sight of him standing there literally makes my chest ache.
He quirks a brow. “All set?”
“Uh…yeah. Sure.”
He tilts his head to the side. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lie and close the distance between us, but before I can slide back onto the four-wheeler and pretend that I’m all set to head back, he stops my momentum by stepping in front of me.
Gently, Luca reaches down and lifts my eyes to his with his fingers under my chin. “Something’s wrong, princess. I can see it all over your face.”
Shit.
When I don’t say anything, he keeps prying.
“C’mon, what’s going on?”
“I…uh…I’m a little sad this is our last night…of the trip,” I admit, but then I coat that honest statement with sugar like a real fucking coward. “I kind of wanted to sleep under the stars one more night.”
His lips quirk up into a smile. “You want to camp out tonight? You, the girl who couldn’t even build her own tent?”
I shrug and glance down at my boots. “I guess you could say camping has grown on me a little.” You’ve grown on me.
“Okay.”
My eyes go wide, and I look up to meet his amused gaze. “Okay?”
He leans forward and surprises me by pressing his lips to mine. “Okay. Tonight, we’ll sleep under the stars.”
Luca
The only thing better than the warmth of a fire is the warmth of a woman. The fire crackles and pops, and Billie sits in my lap, a blanket wrapped around us and my arms wrapped around her.
We could’ve already been back to my cabin, using actual electricity to stay warm, but she surprised the hell out of me this afternoon when she asked to add one more night in nature to our itinerary.
I don’t know what came over her, or why she’d want this when she’s been bitching about camping since we left my cabin several days ago, but here we are. Together, by the fire, enjoying one more night of camping.
Your last night of camping.
A pang of discomfort shoots across my chest, but I swallow hard against it and wrap my arms tighter around her.
Is this our last night together?
I don’t know.
I know she needs to go back to LA soon.
And I know I don’t belong in LA.
So many questions are at the forefront of my mind and nearing the tip of my tongue, but Billie’s voice stops me from asking them.
“I wish we had some music right now,” she comments, and I look down at her, liking the sight of her in my arms a little too much. “I may be the type of girl who always has a song in her head, but sometimes, it’s nice to, you know, hear actual music outside of my brain.”
An amused chortle pops from my lungs, and she looks up at me with a little glare.
“Don’t laugh. I’m serious. I don’t know how you go on these hiking
trips without any damn music.”
“Well, the fact that even getting radio service is difficult out here is one of the reasons.”
“And what’s the other reason?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. I guess I don’t really listen to music much.”
“You don’t listen to music?” she asks, her voice rising in surprise. “That is the saddest thing I’ve ever heard. My sister, Birdie, would die if she heard you say that.”
“She lives in Nashville, right? Pursuing a music career?”
“Yep, and she’s getting ready to head out on her first big tour soon. She’s opening for Blue Street Band…” She pauses and searches my eyes. “But I have a feeling you probably have no idea who they are.”
I smirk and shake my head.
“Well, they’re a big deal in the country music scene.”
“So, I take it music is part of both your and your sister’s daily routine. Like coffee.”
She nods her head, eyes serious. “Music is a necessity. If I’m not actively listening to something, I’m constantly singing something in my head.”
Or humming it out loud. For hours, during our hikes, Billie hummed. Now it makes a little more sense.
“If you could pick one song to listen to for the rest of your life, what would it be?” I ask her, and she lets out an exasperated breath, as if I’ve requested she explain Einstein’s Theory of Relativity.
“That’s a nearly impossible question to answer.”
“But not impossible.” I grin.
“Ugh. Fine.” She sighs. “Give me a minute here…”
“You’re not being graded on this, princess. Any song will do.”
She elbows me in the gut, and I groan. “I said…give me a minute. I take my song choices very seriously.”
Instantly, memories of her rhythmic humming fill my head, and a lightbulb goes off.
“I think I know the song.”
She leans back and narrows her eyes. “How?”
“It’s taken me a little while to figure it out, but I’m pretty sure I know it.”
“Again, how would you know this?”
“Because you’ve been humming it since this trip started.”
Her eyebrows rise toward her forehead. “I hum? Out loud?”
That spurs a laugh from my lungs. “Uh, yeah, you do. Pretty much all the time. You don’t know that you’re humming?”
