by Abigail Agar
Pippa was shocked. He really did believe that she was interested in him. How foolish of George to come to such a conclusion when she had given him no such reason to expect this from her.
“Mr. Sinclair, I fear that you are mistaken. I do apologise; I am not looking to hurt your feelings, but you must understand that there is nothing between us aside from a mutual interest in books,” she said.
“I cannot believe that. I know that it is the way of a young woman to say these things, to be humble and coy, but you must be honest with me. There are many young women who try to get my attention and you have it.”
Pippa was under a great deal of pressure. She did not wish to insult him, but she needed to make it clear to George that he was wasting his time in pursuit of her.
“Mr. Sinclair, I fear that my mother and father would never allow for it. They wish for me only to marry someone with a title. So, you see, I can do nothing about it. They would not approve, and you have made no efforts to find out for yourself whether or not they would give an allowance for this,” she said, trying to clarify for George that he had not gone about this in the right way.
For a moment, he appeared confused, as if he truly did not understand what she was saying or why. Pippa was already prepared to state it all over again if she had to. She was not about to give him a chance to make her feel bad simply because he had been foolhardy enough to think that he deserved her attentions as opposed to trying to do wonderful things which may earn them.
Pippa certainly did not expect any man to pay her any mind simply because another man might. Why should she be forced to fawn over George just because other young ladies did?
“My cousin has a title. He is a baron. I could speak with your mother and father and explain to them that I am as good as any other young man because we do have nobility in the family,” he said.
Pippa knew there was no point in trying to explain that her mother and father wanted her to marry a baron at the very least, not the cousin of a baron. They really wanted to flaunt her before a duke, although it was a waste of time in Pippa’s mind.
But the truth was, Pippa didn’t care about that. She didn’t even care that it was what her mother and father insisted upon for her. She only cared about the fact that she loved someone else. She could not tell George about that, but it was in her heart and there was no point pretending otherwise.
“I am sorry, Mr. Sinclair, but I think you would be best if you tried to focus on a young lady whom you know has already developed feelings for you,” Pippa said.
“But…but you will not make an effort with your mother and father to see if they would accept me?” he asked.
“I do not understand, Mr. Sinclair. Why do you believe that this is what I want? What sign have I given you to make you believe that I am eager to be courted by you?” she questioned further, angered by his assumption that she would fight to be with him.
“And I do not understand why you are trying to be so coy with me. Why can you not just be open and honest about what you want? Why must you insist upon wounding me with your indifference?” he asked forcefully.
Pippa took a step back. She had not been prepared for this. She was unwilling to listen to any more of this nonsense. Whatever had led George Sinclair to behaving in this way, she was certain that she wanted nothing at all to do with it.
“Are you walking away from me?” he demanded as she turned her feet in the other direction.
“Indeed, Mr. Sinclair, I am. I have no desire to listen to you as you berate me for something which I have not done against you. Whatever foolhardy attempt you are making you try and guilt me into being courted by you, it is not going to work. I have given you no reason to believe that I want this,” she said, being more honest than she had previously intended.
George started following her. She tried to quicken her step, but he was limber and faster than Pippa and he kept up with her easily. No one around them in the street cared a bit about her obvious desire to be rid of the man who as going along with her.
“You have no idea the sacrifices I have made for you. You do not know how hard I have had to fight to get anything for you. You may treat me as though I am simply a pest to be rid of, but I can assure you, Miss Blackwell, one day you will understand that you need me. Truly. You needed my help in these days and you shall wish that I had stayed near you in order to help you in the days to come,” he declared.
Pippa turned to him at last, confused and upset by these statements. What was he trying to insinuate? What did George take her for? Why was he going out of his way to suggest that she needed him somehow?
“What are you speaking about? What do you mean by this?” she asked.
George scoffed and shook his head in disdain, looking off into the distance.
“You clearly have no desire to know what I am talking about. You think that you may use me, get me to come and go as you please. Well, Miss Blackwell, I am not a man to be trifled with in such a way,” he said.
“Mr. Sinclair, you said that you have made sacrifices and done so much to assist me. What did you mean by that?” she asked again, insisting and taking a step towards him.
George looked at her with narrowed eyes, a hint of true anger underneath his expression. Whatever he was talking about, it wasn’t good. There was something which Pippa did not know about and she now wanted very desperately to be told. Whatever his reason for hinting and then backing away from the suggestion that he had done something grand, some big gesture on her behalf, it was obvious that he was not going to let her in on the secret.
“Miss Blackwell, I have nothing more to say. I know that you think I may be shifted and used as you like, but you are mistaken. I am not to be used and discarded so easily. Therefore, I bid you adieu,” he said, turning on his own heel and walking away from her.
Pippa considered running after him and asking again to find out what he meant by all his nonsense. But it was pointless. She would get nothing from him. No answers, no apology, and no clarification.
George Sinclair simply wanted to court Pippa and nothing more. He wanted to prove that he was a good man who could make her happy, although she did not believe that for a moment.
Whatever he was trying to say, Pippa would have to figure it out on her own.
Or, maybe not on her own.
She decided not to go into town at the moment after all. Instead, she would go and find Fiona.
By the time Pippa arrived at Fiona’s home, her mind was a blur of curiosity and she instantly launched into her explanation of everything that had happened once she was seated with Fiona, drinking tea.
“So, he thinks he has done something grand for you? I wonder what it was? I cannot imagine him doing anything for any reason aside from his own selfish gains. Then again, perhaps I do not know him so well. He seems like a decent enough fellow, but not the sort you could ever love. Why did you not just tell him that you do not care for him?” Fiona asked.
“I tried. I really did. I told him that I do not think of him romantically and I also told him that my mother and father would never allow it. He was so angry. I have never seen a man’s pride so gravely wounded,” Pippa said.
She meant it. The expression she had seen on George’s face was like nothing she had ever experienced from him. He had always been such a calm and kind man. Even if she hadn’t thought anything overly wonderful about him, at least there was that. But now? Now, that, too, was gone from him.
Pippa and Fiona sat and continued to discuss the entire incident in great detail. At last, they both came to one conclusion only.
George Sinclair would do anything to marry Pippa.
Chapter 24
Doyle was very busy as he worked in his garden. He was pulling up weeds that were trying to strangle some of his flowers.
One of his favorite parts about not being at the bookstore all the time was the fact that he was able to take time to work in the garden. It calmed him and soothed his mind. He had come to find that he was more fr
ustrated now than usual. Most of the time, gardening could bring him all the peace he needed.
But not now.
Now, he was so busy trying to think of what to do in his quest to marry Miss Blackwell that it seemed like a waste of time.
Everything was already prepared for the evening of the book release. Everything, that was, aside from sending the tickets to her mother and father.
This part of the plan was going to take some finesse. After all, he could not risk letting her find out about it. If she found out that he had sent tickets for the evening of the twelfth, the surprise would be ruined.
Moreover, he could not get the tickets to them too far in advance and risk their disapproval and not allowing her to attend. They could easily tell him to leave their daughter alone and try to be rid of him altogether.
Doyle was worried about so many of these things. He wondered if there was a chance that he was going to ruin it all anyway. After all, this was a fragile thing that he was building.
But Doyle was not willing to give up.
He knew that he needed to make this happen if he was ever going to have the happy life he hoped for with Miss Blackwell.
Just then, Doyle saw Mr. and Mrs. Dailey, his two neighbors, coming out from their home. He smiled to greet them, but they did not even notice him. They were busy, caught up in conversation about something else.
“Oh, hush, John. I know that they are our friends, but I have no desire to go and attend this silly little ball of theirs. Lady Brinkley insulted me the last time we went, and I do not wish to have to see her again. She is a most disagreeable woman,” Mrs. Dailey said.
“I know that, darling, but this ball is important. It is a chance for our family to grow closer to the families of London society who are actually important. If Lord and Lady Brinkley are somewhat disagreeable, there is nothing we can do to stop that, but we must be sociable regardless,” Mr. Dailey replied.
Doyle listened very intently, wanting to know more of the details.
“Oh, you are awful for making me attend this ball. I shall never allow you to forget what you are making me do,” Mrs. Dailey threatened.
A ball? It was certainly the sort of ball that he imagined Miss Blackwell being invited to. He was already aware of the fact that her mother and father were friends with Lord Brinkley, who was a cousin of Mr. Dailey’s. Indeed, if they were attending this ball, Miss Blackwell would also be there.
Suddenly, Doyle was overcome by the worst idea he had ever had. He knew that it was foolish, that it was complete nonsense, and it would not work properly. He was certain, with all his mind, that he was going to live to regret this. But he had to do it. He had to step forward and make this happen. If he did not, he would live to regret it.
Bewildered by his choices, regret to do and regret not to do, he decided that he would take the greatest risk for the greatest reward.
He rushed inside and changed his clothing, making himself look presentable. Then, he went back outside and tried to wave down a coach. At last, he found someone to take him just a short distance across town to where James and Clarissa lived.
He was incredibly relieved to see that James was home. Moreover, he was relieved that Clarissa was not. He had a strange feeling that she would disapprove of what he was about to do. She would tell him that there were more honorable ways to go about it.
Yet he was no longer in the mood for that. In fact, Doyle felt as if he had destroyed all his honor the day he had stolen the manuscript. When he had found it and decided that he was going to clean it, that was the day he had lost his integrity.
But now, maybe if he could make things right on this evening, maybe then he could have his integrity restored, fully.
Once he sat down with James, Doyle was ready to launch into his plan.
“James, I need you to listen to me. I know that this idea which I am about to share with you is foolish. I know that there are many who would accuse me of being nonsensical. Even though they may be right to an extent, I can assure you that I am not a fool. I am doing the right thing,” he insisted, before even telling James what his plan was.
“And? What is this right thing?” James asked.
“Well, I need to get into a very fine ball. Actually, I need your help to get me into this very fine ball. You see, I need to have the opportunity to see Miss Blackwell and to dance with her and allow her to see me from a new perspective; that of a gentleman. I know that she has, until now, only seen me as a man who owns a bookshop, but I am more than that.”
Before James could speak, Doyle continued, eager to prove himself.
“I have a great deal of honour and if I may garner the respect of those she is accustomed to being near, maybe I can prove my worth to Miss Blackwell and also to her mother and father,” Doyle said.
“And what am I meant to do for you in this? You think that I can help you somehow?” James asked.
“Of course you can. You are connected. You know so many men and women in society. I thought that, perhaps, you might be able to get me an invitation to his ball? It is at the residence of Lord and Lady Brinkley.”
He stared at James, waiting for his friend to process this request. When he saw the smile little thing on James’s face, Doyle knew that he was about to get everything he wanted.
“An invitation? You think it is going to be easy for me to come up with something like that? I am not so well-connected as to be able to get an invitation to a ball from men like that either,” James said.
“But you know the right people. Surely you can convince someone to give an invitation? Even if you are open and honest and you tell them that it is on behalf of a love-struck man who is eager to see to it that he has an opportunity to dance with a most beloved woman,” Doyle said.
James’s brows raised in surprise. Doyle had never spoken so passionately, but he was truly desperate now to have his time with Miss Blackwell and to finally dance with her. He needed to show her that he could be like any other man. He was not merely a stuffy old bookseller, but a man in his own right.
“Well, I must confess that I do not know whether or not it shall work, but you certainly have me convinced. I am sure that I can find a way to get them to pay attention if I share your impassioned hope for an invitation to this ball. You say it is Lord and Lady Brinkley?”
Doyle nodded eagerly.
“Yes, precisely. They are the ones who are hosting,” he affirmed.
“All right. I believe Mr. Williams knows Lord Brinkley’s nephew. He can surely arrange it for me. Just give me some time. The ball is this evening, I assume?” James asked.
“I believe so,” Doyle replied.
“In that case, I shall have to be quick about it. You return home and I shall come as soon as I have something for you. Just bear in mind that I may not manage to make this happen. I shall have to beg and plead, and it is only if they are merciful to me that I am going to succeed,” James warned.
“All I can ask is that you try your hardest on my behalf. I know that I am foolish for even daring to think it is possible, but I truly want to find a way to make this happen. I have never wanted anything more in all my life,” Doyle admitted.
James shook his head.
“My goodness, what has this woman done to you? The Doyle Brooks I know would never want to attend a ball, much less to impress a lady. But here you are, unable to help yourself when it comes to Miss Blackwell.”
“Yes, yes, I know,” Doyle said.
“Very well, then. In that case, I shall make every effort. I am on my way at once,” James promised, standing and making his way to the door. Doyle joined him and they rode together in the coach as far as they could before going their separate ways.
