“It’s just too terrible. I am so sorry you had to endure such horror. How could a man be so heartless?”
“Apparently there are a lot of things that go on behind closed doors that we girls never hear about until it’s too late.”
“People should discuss such things instead of hiding them away like secrets. Such behavior should never be allowed.” Elise drew the brush through her sister’s brown-black hair. “Keeping them secret just encourages bullies like Nelson Worthington to act as they will.”
“Yes, but it is very embarrassing. The woman always seems to be blamed for encouraging the attack. The man is never at fault. Aunt Martha even hinted at this while we were packing. You had gone downstairs for another trunk, and she came to my room and begged me not to do this. She said Uncle James would surely be able to make some sort of deal with Nelson. Imagine that. Paying someone not to strike his wife.”
“Money has always been the solution to problems where Uncle James and Aunt Martha are concerned.”
“And I bought into it.” Caroline pulled away and turned in her seat. “I’m so sorry for what I did. Abandoning all of you for wealth and comfort. My circumstances have given me a lot of time to think, and I can see how truly blind I was. Mama and Papa would have given their lives for both of us. That was a love worth far more than material things.”
Elise sat on the edge of her bunk. “You were young, and it wasn’t unusual that you should desire nice things. There were times when I wanted them as well.” She smiled. “I just wanted them here.”
Caroline shook her head. “I broke Mama’s heart. It’s probably my fault that she’s dead.”
“No. A fever claimed her life. You know how strong our mother was. She wouldn’t give up on you, nor let the separation cause her heart to break. She was eternally hopeful, and she knew she could see you each time we came to Oswego.”
“But I treated you all so badly, and I’m sorry. I don’t know why you even speak to me, Elise.”
“You’re my sister and I love you. I won’t ever stop.”
Caroline leaned forward and embraced Elise tightly. “I owe you an apology for so much.”
“I owe you one too for my anger at your leaving and for trying to take over Mama’s place in your life after she died.” Elise hugged her sister close. “We’ve both made mistakes.”
“But mine have been so much worse, and the consequences are far reaching.” Caroline released Elise and began to cry. “I lied.”
“About what?”
“I’m going to have a baby.”
Elise felt the blood drain from her face. “What?”
“That’s why I have to get out of town. I’m carrying Nelson’s child, and he must never know.”
Booker Duran stood outside the open window of Elise’s cabin. He’d just overheard her entire conversation with her sister and felt as if he’d been given the answer to his circumstances. He would tell Elise what he’d overheard and threaten her sister with exposure if Elise said anything about his bloody shirt. Furthermore, he could force her to cozy up to him—be more affectionate. It was clear she loved her sister and was willing to sacrifice a great deal for her.
He grinned. It sounded like this Nelson Worthington was a wealthy man, and wealthy men and their families never wanted any scandal attached to their names. The situation was perfect. He could go to Caroline’s husband and broker a deal—something that would give him the money he needed to really get away and head west—maybe California.
Knowing Elise was given to taking an evening stroll on the deck, even when in port, Booker waited for his opportunity, all the while running through the various things he might be able to accomplish with this knowledge. He felt powerful after so long living in fear and concern that someone might recognize him as Robert Wayfair.
When he spied Elise, he made a beeline for her. He grabbed her arm and dragged her out of sight of the gangplank and deckhouse. She started to protest, but he put his hand over her mouth.
“Shut up and listen or you’ll regret it, because I know all about your little sister’s condition.” Elise went still, and Booker released his hold. “I thought that would get your attention.”
“What are you talking about?” she asked in a hushed whisper.
“I stood outside your window earlier. I heard everything you two discussed. I know her condition and the situation of her marriage and the fact that her husband, Nelson Worthington, must never know about the baby.” He grinned. “Seems to me that’s valuable information. Information that can help me along my way.”
“What do you want?” She glared at him in such a way that he could almost feel her fear. It didn’t dissuade him in the least; rather, it excited him. He loved having power over people.
“I want you to keep your mouth shut about my bloodied shirt. I don’t need to be accused of murdering that man in Duluth.”
“Did you?”
He chuckled, keeping his laugh low, lest someone overhear. “Does it matter? You’ve already decided I’m guilty.”
“Well, you’re too late. I’ve already mentioned it to my father and Nick. They’re going to check it out.”
He squeezed her arm. “Then you’d best talk to them again and tell them you were wrong. Tell them you thought it through and realized your timing was off.”
“Even if I did, don’t you think they’re smart enough to still check into the matter? If you aren’t guilty, you’ll have nothing to hide.”
“I won’t have anything to hide because you’ll tell everyone we were together that night.” The thought came to him so quickly as a solution that he accidentally raised his voice. He stopped the second he realized it and glanced around to see if anyone had overheard him. Thankfully, most everyone was still in town, leaving him to the evening watch.
“You’re hurting me,” Elise said, trying to twist away. “Let go of me, or I’ll scream.”
“You do, and I’ll throw you overboard.”
She settled immediately.
He loosened his hold slightly. “I can be easy to get along with so long as you do what I say.”
She said nothing. Booker couldn’t help himself. He reached up to touch her face. He’d wanted to do that for a long time. “You and me are going to get to know each other a whole lot better.”
“I won’t do anything with you.”
“You will, or that sweet little sister of yours is going to pay the price. I know where her husband is and that he’d pay good money to get her back. You’ll cooperate . . . or I’ll telegraph him and let him know where to find his wife.” He grinned and let her go. “Or maybe I should just go find him now.”
“If you overheard everything, then you know how difficult this has been on her. Have you no consideration for anyone but yourself?”
“Not the least bit. I’m the only one looking out for me, so that pretty much takes up my time.”
“My father was foolish to think he could help you.”
Booker grinned. “Aye, he was. I don’t need help.”
“You need it to get out of being accused of murder,” Elise replied, crossing her arms against her chest. “Which I’m beginning to think you must have done, or you wouldn’t be so worried about having an alibi.”
Her reasoning irritated him, and he leaned in closer. “The matter is settled. You’ll do things my way or you’ll regret it . . . along with your little sister. Think it over.”
He could see the growing fear in her eyes, and it thrilled him. He wanted nothing more than to force a kiss upon those trembling lips, but he held back. Give her time to think, and she’d come willingly enough. He was certain of that. Certain enough that he’d stake his life on it.
Elise couldn’t stop shaking. She knew if she moved, her knees would buckle. Why had she been so foolish as to leave that window open? It had been stuffy, and she’d opened the window to air out the room.
She gripped the rail, and tears began to fall. She’d ruined everything for her sister. All she had wanted
to do was help her. She’d had no way of knowing Caroline was with child. She’d had no way of knowing Booker Duran was listening. Now she found herself in an impossible situation.
Oh, Father in heaven, what am I to do?
Chapter 18
Nick reread the letter from Mrs. Schmitt, torn as to what he should do. His father was quite ill. Mrs. Schmitt felt certain he was dying. A part of Nick wanted to race to Boston to see him one last time. But he wasn’t sure he’d even be admitted to the house. His father had made it clear that he would never be welcomed back, but Mrs. Schmitt felt otherwise. In fact, she urged Nick to come home immediately. She pled for him to put aside the past and see his father before it was too late.
He glanced at the top of the letter. It was dated a week prior. It might already be too late. His father might be dead by now. He considered sending a telegram, but Mrs. Schmitt probably wouldn’t have the money to send a reply without asking for help from Father.
“I must go to Boston.” He shook his head. There was no other choice.
“I was hoping you’d be back from town,” the captain declared, walking toward him across the deck. “I’ve got some problems.”
“So do I.” Nick glanced up apologetically. “And I’m sure they’re about to add to yours.”
Captain Wright sobered. “Let’s talk in my cabin.” He opened the door to the small but ample room and ushered Nick inside. “What’s going on?”
“My father is dying. The housekeeper begs me to come for a final visit.”
“My problems are simple in comparison. My brother-in-law is sending me to Toronto for a special shipment. It’ll only tie us up for a few days, but it’s enough.” The captain smiled. “You must go to your father.”
Nick had never tried to hide his circumstances from the captain or his daughter. “I don’t know that he wants me there, sir. He did disown me and put me from the house.”
“Ten years ago. That’s a long time to rethink a decision. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if your father is hoping to make things right before he dies.” The captain gave a sigh. “And even if he doesn’t, it might ease your mind.”
“You talk like you know how this goes.”
Captain Wright looked up and nodded. “I do. When I was young, I used to fish with my father. We had the best of times. I always thought I’d grow up to be a fisherman like him, but I fell in with the wrong people. I did a lot that I’m not proud of, and my father told me I would have to part company with my friends or sever ties with the family. I was young and insolent and didn’t want to be told what to do by my father, so I severed the family ties. The years passed, and I learned soon enough that my father only desired to protect me. I saw the true ambitions of my friends and put distance between us. I thought several times of going home to apologize.”
“But you didn’t?”
“No. I let the time get away from me, and then word came one day that my father had died. I hated myself all the more and gave up on trying to be a good man. I convinced myself that I must be rotten to the core and again chose friends who were just as mean and coarse as I was. Despair can be a crippling affair.”
“Yes.” Nick folded the letter and put it in his pocket. “If I go, can I . . . would you . . .”
“Take you back as my first mate?” The older man smiled. “I would. After all, you are a bit more than that to me—are you not?”
It was Nick’s turn to sigh. “I hope to be. Thank you, sir. I think you know that it means a lot to me. I care deeply for your daughter, and I know she won’t be parted from you and this ship.”
“It does my heart good to know you care for her, Nicodemus. You are a man of God, and I know you wouldn’t try to lead her astray. She is worldly-wise in many ways, yet naïve and easily misinformed in others. Both of my daughters are precious to me, and I would hate to see them mistreated. Caroline is to sail with us to Duluth when the time comes. For now, she’ll join us on this short run to Toronto. She’s desperate to be out of her husband’s clutches, and given all that he’s done to her, I’m just as anxious to have her gone.”
“I’m sorry there are problems in her life that have sent her back to you, but I know you are glad to have her.”
“Her husband beat her. I certainly can’t leave her to be a victim of his abuse.” Captain Wright’s expression grew sad. “My wife and I worked hard to teach our girls the meaning of marriage and the commitment a couple make not only to each other but to God when they wed. Yet here I am, taking her away from her husband. I never should have let her leave to live with her uncle. I should never have let her marry a man I knew nothing about. I only wanted to give her what she wanted—to show her how much I loved her.”
“Sir, I don’t know exactly what the problem might be, but I believe children become adults and make their own choices.”
“That’s true enough, but if I could go back, I would do things differently. I don’t know about the road traveled by you and your father, but I can honestly say I would do it all differently if I could. Since none of us can, I am encouraging you to go home and make things right, at the very least. Who knows, you might even find the need to remain there. I wouldn’t fault you if you did.”
Nick shook his head. “I could never leave Elise. Not for long.”
“You should tell her what you’re going to do. She’s in her cabin with her sister.”
“Thank you. I’ll see if she might walk with me in town, if that meets with your approval. She can go with me to get a train ticket.”
“Keep your faith, Nick. God isn’t through with you yet.”
Nick nodded and stepped into the galley. He was glad no one had come for snacks or coffee. Not that there were any to be had. He walked to Elise’s cabin and knocked on the door. When she opened it and gave him a smile, Nick felt as if everything would be all right.
“I have to tell you something and wondered if you’d go with me for a walk.”
“Of course. Let me get my hat and coat. The air’s turned chilly.”
He waited while she gathered her things, and they walked through the ship together.
“Where are we going?” Elise asked as they made their way down the gangplank.
“First to the train station. Then I thought I might buy you dinner . . . if you’d like.”
“I’d like that very much, but why are we going to the train station?” Her expression was worried.
Nick hesitated to tell her the reason, knowing she would be upset. “I . . . I need to go home. To Boston. My father is dying.”
“Oh, Nick, I’m so sorry. How terrible for you.” She gripped his arm with her hand. “Have you spoken to Papa?”
“Yes. He convinced me to go, in fact.”
She nodded. “He would. He was estranged from his own father once.”
“Yes. He told me about it.”
“He did?” She looked surprised. “He never speaks of it to anyone outside of the family.”
“Maybe he’s starting to think of me as family.” Nick stopped short of asking for her hand. It was too rushed and definitely the wrong time.
They reached the train station just as the ticket office was closing. Nick quickly asked for a ticket on the next train to Boston.
“The trip will take over twenty hours. There’s a layover in Albany,” the stationmaster told him. He handed him the tickets. “You’ll board at four thirty a.m.”
“Thank you.” Nick handed him the money and took the tickets.
Elise watched him, her expression questioning. “You didn’t get a roundtrip ticket.”
He heard the veiled sadness in her voice. “No. I don’t know what I’ll find when I reach Boston. The letter sent to me by Mrs. Schmitt was already over a week old. He may be gone by now.”
She nodded and again put her hand on his arm. “I will pray for you both.”
Elise didn’t feel much like conversation as they sat and shared a meal. She hated that Nick was leaving and she had no way of knowing when—or if—she wou
ld see him again.
“I hate that I have to go. I don’t want to be parted from you,” he said.
She looked up from a plate of untouched noodles and sauce. “I know. I don’t wish to be parted from you either. I know it’s the right thing to do, however. I won’t make you feel regret for that. I’ve long prayed that the walls might come down between you and your father.”
“You have?” Nick looked at her oddly. “Why?”
She shrugged and toyed with her noodles. “I know there won’t be any peace in your heart until the issues between you and your father are resolved. You love him, despite everything.”
“I do.” He sat back and seemed to be considering her comment.
“It is the right thing to do, then.” She forced herself to eat a bit of the food.
They ate without talking for several minutes, and to Elise it felt as if a monumental weight had been placed on her shoulders. How was she going to keep Booker Duran under control?
“Is my departure all that’s bothering you tonight?”
Her head snapped up. “Why would you ask that?”
Nick smiled. “I talked with your father. I know your sister is leaving Oswego to escape an abusive husband. I can’t imagine you are bearing that well.”
“No.” Elise forced herself to relax. “She’s so upset, and I cannot make it right for her any more than I can for you.” She smiled. “My mother always had a talent for making bad situations better. I had hoped to inherit some of that skill from her, but it seems I only make things worse.”
“That’s not true.” His voice was full of compassion. “You have made my evening quite a bit better. Your sister will heal in time.”
“It isn’t that easy. I feel terrible for her. Marriage to a man of high social status was all she wanted. She thought he was in love with her, but it turns out he only married her for her large dowry. He already had a mistress who was with child.”
Nick’s eyes fired with anger. “He’s a cad, and she is better off without him. Although I know it’s hard on your father to think of coming between a couple God joined together.”
Waiting on Love Page 18
