What God Brings Together

by Melissa Wardwell

  She watched him at the end of the table, carving that seventeen-pound turkey, laughing at a joke Aaron had just told him. All three kids looked happy too. They seemed whole again.

  ***

  Stephen watched David carve the turkey and realized that it was nice to have a man around the house. He and David had had a couple of talks in the last few weeks. Guy stuff. He hadn’t told his mom yet, but he figured since they had been going out for those walks on Sundays, that she wouldn’t care.

  He looked at her and saw she was watching David and noticed she had a strange smile on her face. One he had never seen before. He thought she looked beautiful. She looked light and calm as she watched him.

  Stephen didn’t understand all that was going on between them, but if it led to David becoming a permanent resident around the house, he was good with that.

  He reached over to his mom, who sat next to him, and took her hand. “I’m sorry about earlier, Mom.”

  “It’s okay Stephen, I forgive you.”

  Chapter 20

  David still was a puzzle to her, but she didn’t really care anymore. She wanted to know about him. There was still a nagging voice in the back of her mind that asked, who was he? What she did know about him was appealing to any woman but so many could not look past the scars and the limp. This man sitting across from her was nice, caring, thoughtful, and she could now add, fun. She had a good time whenever he was around.

  She looked around at those who were sitting at the table. Kids all had smiles. Everyone seemed to be just as happy and content with him here as she was. David and the boys were having a conversation about football when she heard him ask them if they liked to play.

  He looked up at her, “You mind if I take them outside to throw the ball around?”

  “Um, sure! Yeah, that would be great. It’ll give me time to clean up. It looks like someone might be going down for a little nap.” She nodded her head in Sarah’’s direction and David caught her meaning. Sarah was half asleep at the table. Her sweet little head kept bobbing up and down as she dozed. Her elbow was on the table with her fork in the air. At the end of the fork was a rather large piece of turkey. They looked at each other and laughed quietly.

  “She seems far enough along that she might need help getting upstairs. You want me to take her up?” he asked.

  Her brain said “NO!” But her heart said, “You can trust him”. She wanted to trust him. “Are you sure you can with your leg?”

  “I’m having a good day today. I’ll just have to take it slow.”

  “Well, if you’re sure, I’ll show you up. Boys, scrape the plates and I will do the rest. And finish your milk Aaron.” She ordered. “David, go ahead and grab her and follow me up. It is a good thing you are here. I would have to leave her here at the table. She has gotten too big for me to carry.” He seemed to happily comply.

  He followed her up the stairs and into Sarah’s room. He laid her down while Emma covered her up. She looked up at David and caught him watching Sarah sleep. She could see the longing in his eyes.

  “Does this make you miss your family?”

  “Yeah. I am realizing I am missing out on a lot.” He shifted his gazed to Emma and said, “I hope God will give me a second chance, some day.” He took a deep breath, looked back at Sarah, “Well, I guess it is time for some football.” He looked again at Emma, “I promise to take it easy on them.”

  With a smirk and a small laugh, he left the room. Emma waited until she knew he was downstairs and outside with the boys. She had to talk to someone. She knew it was a holiday, but she needed clarity.

  Normally she would call Ann, but she had a feeling this time she needed to call Pastor Cross. She wanted to leave him alone with his family, but she would try to be quick.

  She walked down stairs and went for her phone that was on the counter and looked up the pastor’s phone number and hesitantly pushed ‘send’. She walked the floor as the phone rang on the other end. She didn’t know what her questions were, but she knew she had them.

  “Hello.”

  “Pastor Cross? This is Emma.”

  “Emma! Happy Thanksgiving! What can I do for ya? How has your afternoon been?”

  “It’s been…interesting to say the least. I have some questions for you. I’ll try to make it quick though.”

  “Alright, let’s hear it.”

  She paused a moment, not sure how to ask. “Are you still there, Emma?”

  “What? Yes, just trying to get the wording right.”

  “Oh this is a big deal. Let me turn off the TV here so I can focus.”

  That broke her tension a bit and it made her giggle. There was no background noise on his end to indicate he was watching the television.

  “Okay, ready when you are dear.”

  “I know you meet with David on Mondays...”

  “Did he tell you that?”

  “Yes”

  “Then I will confirm it.”

  “Is he...” She looked out the kitchen window to see him toss the ball. “Is he trustworthy?”

  “Yes, I would say so. He has given me no reason not to trust him.”

  “Good, because I invited him over for supper today.”

  “Wow! Well that was nice of you. Seems like a big step for you.”

  “We have actually been having Sunday dinner together for the last three weeks. When I found out he would be alone today, I invited him over.”

  “I see.”

  “Pastor, something is happening, but I need to know first.”

  “Just ask me whatever it is you want to know. Keep in mind though, I may not be able to answer your question.”

  “I can accept that.” She paused for a minute, trying to get a hold of everything going through her head. “Oh, I’ll just come right out and ask - Is he Ryan?” She let out the breath she was holding because she felt dizzy, but when there was no answer right away, she found herself holding it again. It made her pulse race and her head spin. The anticipation of his answer made her crazy.

  “Emma, did he tell you he was?”

  “Well, no, but the things he has been saying and the way he acts, even the way we work together in the kitchen seems so natural, like Ryan and I did. I just need to know.”

  “If he is Ryan, how would you feel about it?”

  “I’m not sure. I have been running this through my brain the last three weeks.”

  “And if he isn’t, will it change anything?”

  Emma thought for a minute. “I guess, not really.”

  “So does it really matter?”

  “I guess not.”

  “Hmmm, interesting,” was his quiet reply. “Alright, let me just say this then. If he is Ryan, let him reveal himself when he is ready. I can imagine that he deals with enough guilt for leaving you. If he isn’t Ryan, then enjoy the friendship you are building. Just follow his lead, okay?”

  “Pastor Cross? You know the answer, don’t you?”

  “Yes, dear, I do. But it is not for me to tell you. Trust, hon. You need to trust him, me and most importantly, God. When it is time, you’ll know. What is your gut telling you?”

  “That he is Ryan.”

  “Very interesting. Trust, Emma. God would not lead you down this path if it was bad for you and the kids. You believe that?”

  “Yes.”

  “Okay then, just enjoy your time getting to know the man and don’t worry so much about it. The man won’t hurt you or the kids. Alright?”

  “Yes. Thank you Pastor. Have a good evening.”

  “You too.”

  She felt a bit more at peace as she hung up the call. “Just go with it Emma. It has been long enough” she told herself.

  Now feeling like she was on more solid ground, she put her phone down and went to the sink to wash the dishes. When she glanced outside, she found herself having to do a double take. There in her backyard, in forty-degree weather, were three bare chests. All three males had stripped themselves of their shirts. The boys were n
o surprise to her. They walk around the house bare chested all the time, but David, well, he surprised her.

  She knew that staring at the man was probably not a good thing. Her heart rate increased, blood surged through her veins and she felt her face flush. His years of being a “Jack of all trades” as he had put it, had been good to him. But the longer she looked at him, the more his scars became obvious. Half of his torso was covered in burns. She could now follow the line of burns from head to toe, well she guessed to his toes.

  The excitement of seeing such a well-built man in her backyard shifted to compassion. He had clearly been through something traumatic.

  She could see why he would think everyone thought him a monster. It reminded her of the comic strip pictures she had seen in Aaron’s room of Batman and one of the villains, Two Face. She knew David wasn’t evil, just the scars made him look that way.

  Her hands flew to her face, because she could feel the sorrow for this man build up in her chest. She could easily imagine the horrific tragedy that this man endured because it was probably much like Ryan’s. Her hands were soapy but she didn’t notice. She couldn’t control her cries. She was glad she was inside and they were out there. But then, David turned sideways, giving her full view of his left profile. It was not burned and scarred only a little, and her heart stopped and she gasped. Just like Ryan.

  “Oh God, it is him!” She whispered. She was having a hard time breathing, but she knew without a doubt now. She studied that profile often enough to be burned into her brain, and her heart. It was unmistakable now. “Why didn’t I see it before?”

  “Mama, are you okay?” Sarah had awakened from her nap.

  “Yeah Honey.” She wiped the tears from her face with her hands, trying to hide the emotion. She didn’t want to scare her little girl. “Why don’t you go start a movie? I will go get your brothers. Mr. David and I need to talk.”

  “Can we have popcorn?”

  “Yeah, I’ll have Stephen get it going. Go on now.”

  Emma grabbed her coat of the coat rack, walked out the back door to the porch and called the boys.

  “Stephen! Aaron! Inside! Now Please!” Mama has to have a talk with your Dad!

  ***

  The tone of her voice caused all three of them to stop what they were doing. The boys looked at each other and then at him with understanding that someone was in trouble. It most likely would be him.

  “Go on, she sounds upset.”

  That was an understatement. He knew what that tone of voice meant. He heard it plenty of times when the boys were little. At least she didn’t use their middle names. If he really thought about it, she had scolded him a time or two with that tone when they were first married.

  Seeing her this way reminded him why he had tried so hard push this image from his mind. She was beautiful and sweet most of the time, with her golden hair and bright blue eyes, but when she got irritated with him, she made him think of some Nordic warrior princess. Oh yeah, that got him in even more trouble one time.

  They had been standing in the kitchen, and she was giving him her “what for” about him leaving laundry on the living room floor, and all he could do was look her up and down and grin stupidly at how stunning she looked at that moment. That had made her even madder because she thought he wasn’t listening now. He wasn’t. She was yelling at him with all the fire and spirit that he knew she had possessed, and all he wanted to do was pick her up, cradle her in his arms, and carry her down the hall. When her hand came up to smack him for not listening, he grabbed that hand, pulled her to him, and did just what he was thinking about. The roast was burned that day but neither of them worried about it. They had enjoyed the whole evening locked in their room, only coming out for the necessities – crackers, peanut butter and water - and back to the bedroom. He had a suspicion Stephen was a result of that evening but he would never tell. That was a moment meant for them alone.

  Now, all these years later, his feisty princess was standing in front of him again. The only problem was this time, he had no rights to her. She was not his anymore. They were not married. He had to keep his cool now. No sweeping her off her feet tonight, or any night for that matter. For now.

  He watched the boys make their way to the house and gave a meek wave in response to theirs. “Sleep good, guys!”

  “You too, Mr. David. It was nice knowing you!” Aaron said. That got a scowl out of her as he passed her on the deck. He had to smile at the image.

  “Don’t you worry about me. I can handle it.”

  He then heard Aaron say, “Don’t count on it.”

  If they only knew.

  He then heard her give instructions to make popcorn and watch a movie with Sarah. As he watched his boys go into the house, he felt pride swell again within his chest. They are good boys. Emma then turned her sights back on him. A wealth of emotions crossed her face but there were three he knew well - anger, sadness and confusion.

  Chapter 21

  She was not sure what to feel now that she was alone with him. It wasn’t like before. Before, there was just suspicion of who he was. A friendship had built between them. Now she knew, without a shadow of a doubt. He was her Ryan. The man who made her stomach do cartwheels every time he walked into the room. The man who had treated her with such tenderness and care no matter how wicked she would be toward him. The man who made her knees weak with every single kiss, including the light peck her gave her on the cheek the last time she saw him before the accident.

  She remembered that day with such disgust. Not in him, but in herself. She had been mean to him and merciless when he apologized. That afternoon had haunted her every night. She could have been nicer. She could have shown forgiveness. Instead she ignored him and let him leave doubting how much she really needed him.

  No wonder he had decided she could do better without him. Not once had she indicated she needed him since Stephen was born. She had somehow, during that first pregnancy, learned to do things without him. It took divorce papers for her to see it though. Now, eight years later, here he was, standing in her backyard. In the freezing cold, snow starting to fall, still missing his shirt, which made her a bit nervous and heart sick.

  His torso was mix of muscles and scars. Seeing all of the pain in those marks left on his body from the fire broke her heart.

  “Please put your shirt on, I can’t think.” She heard the frustration in her voice as she said it. “I’m sorry, that was harsh. Just give me a minute.” She closed her eyes, bowed her head, took a deep breath and said a quick prayer. Lord, you have brought him back to us. I can’’t face these emotions on my own. I can’t face him and say all I need to without your help. Help me to say what I need to and show him kindness.

  She lifted her head to see that he had moved toward her and was now standing five feet from her. At that moment, her heart began to race, and she could feel the pressure build on the back side of her eyes. Her muscles tightened up and she tried to relax, as she squeezed her hands a few times. It didn’t work. She couldn’t talk or move. All she could do was look at him. She didn’t know which emotion to feel first.

  ***

  He saw her struggle. In the way she moved her hands but stood stone still. He could see her chest rise and fall in shallow breaths. He could see the tears pooling in her eyes. She was even having a hard time talking. He could see the gears rolling, but her mouth wouldn’t let her speak it. So, he would force her.

  “Say it, Emma. Just say it.” She shook her head in response.

  He took another step toward her. He could see her breathing get even faster. If she didn’t say what he knew in his heart she wanted to, she was going to pass out from the lack of oxygen.

  “Say it before you pass out, honey.” That got her attention.

  In a soft whisper she said, “I can’t”, while she was still shaking her head in disbelief.

  ***

  Emma knew she had to say something, but she didn’t know where to start. She had been dreaming for
years that this would happen and now that it had. Nothing was coming out of her mouth. She was stunned.

  She felt a tear run down her cheek and before she could reach up to wipe it away, his thumb brushed at her cheek, and her breathing stopped.

  “Emma, honey, I can see that you know the truth now. I knew I couldn’t hide from you for long, but you have to say something.”

  A breathy “Ryan?” was all she could say. She had to think carefully what came out next.

  “Yes,” was his only response. It sounded like music when she said his name and not called him David. Sweet, beautiful music.

  He was taken aback by what she did next but he knew he had to let her. He deserved it.

  The tears poured from her eyes, like someone had turned on the faucet in a sink, and with a shrill-like sound, she started pounding on him. They weren’t lightweight, soft as a feather pounding either. Quite a few of the hits had hurt. He knew though that this physical pain was small compared to what he put her through.

  She was getting stronger with each hit to his chest. He reached out to grab her shoulders to brace himself so he didn’t to fall over on her. She hadn’t noticed. He had a need to touch her, even if she was pelting him with her fists. He then felt his breath catch and felt the tears in his own eyes build pressure. That’s when she looked up at him, stopped hitting his chest, let out a couple of heart wrenching sobs and went limp. The weight of her falling in his arms caused him to lose balance and the both fell in a heap to the ground.

  They knelt in the yard, holding each other like it was their last day on earth. She didn’t pull away from him; he wasn’t sure he would let her if she tried. He didn’t think he would ever let her go again. No matter what happened after tonight, he would never leave her side again. He would do his best to be the man she needed and the kind of dad his kids needed. Even if she only let him be a father to their children and not her husband. His running was over.