Poking her rib, I wait for an answer. She simply closes her eyes and shuts me out. I prod her ribs again and receive a tiny flinch in response. Apart from that, Lainey ignores me—appearing lost in her own thoughts. When her cowardly behaviour continues, I click my fingers in front of her face.
“Earth to Lainey,” I bite out. “I want to know how you got the scars all over your beautiful body. Did you finally crash that motorcycle I told you to stop riding? I told you that you shouldn’t ride solo. It’s not appropriate for a woman to ride alone.”
Her mouth drops open at my question. I keep my expression purposely blank. I’m not stupid, I know that I caused some of them. I also know that I can’t possibly be responsible for all of them.
Surely, not?
Lainey’s eyes widen, she uses the handcuffs to lift herself into an awkward sitting position, then her eyes basically roll back in her head and she screams at me.
“I’ve never crashed my bike.” Her answer is filled with spite. I hold myself back from reacting, which seems to set her off more. “Stop calling me Lainey. You really are insane, aren’t you? You know exactly how I got these scars. From what you did to me on our last night together.”
In a rush, she details every injury I gave her that night. Broken bones, ruptured organs, a punctured lung, internal bleeding. Lainey lays it all on my shoulders. I feel myself bowing under the weight—regret, guilt, sorrow.
Culpability.
I hurt her. I really, really hurt her. Not in a way that can be validated by anything she did to me. There is no excuse that justifies what I did when I attempted to kill her.
The knowledge hits hard. I hold onto it with all my might. It’s a lesson I don’t want to forget.
I never want to feel like this again.
“Stop it,” I beg. Dropping to my knees, I yell at her, “I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ANYMORE!”
“Why not? If I can talk about it, you should be able to hear about it.” Lainey meets my pleading eyes with a cool gaze. “I was the person who was hurt, not you. You should know what you—”
With one hand, I grab her face, my fingers digging into her cheeks and I squeeze her lips shut to stop her from talking.
In an uncertain tone, I offer my excuses. I know they’re worthless, but if I can just get her to understand a little bit, maybe the guilt will stop devouring me alive?
“You wouldn’t listen. You brought it on yourself by seeing him. By taking a job with him. I knew you wanted to leave me even after I told you I loved you.”
When she doesn’t try to argue again, I let go of her face and lean over her to kiss her. Climbing from the floor without taking my lips from Lainey’s, I lower my body over hers and try to make her see how sorry I am with my touch. My cock nudges her heat. I drag in a shuddering breath, expecting to find salvation and ending up with chaos instead.
Lainey squeezes her legs shut and bucks beneath me.
“Get the hell off me, Brendan,” she shouts while I wrestle her back under control. “Why would you think that I’d want you to touch me after what you've done to me?”
She pulls as far away from me as she can. I temper my frustration and try something else with her.
Taking responsibility.
“Darling girl, I’m going to make both of us forget all about the pain and hurt.” A groan escapes me when I rock myself against her core. “We can start fresh right now. Be mine again. I love you, Lainey, I always have. If you listen to me, you won't ever get hurt again. I promise.”
Kissing her again, I softly knead her breasts and continue to press my cock against her heat. I don’t force my way into her body—I want her to choose to accept me. Rather, I rub my length against her wet warmth and her clit.
It works.
“Oh, Brendan.” Lainey moans against me.
Her lips part and she allows me access to her mouth. I deepen our kiss, our tongues tangling, dancing together. I fall still, refusing to ruin this moment by accidentally penetrating her in my haze of passion. My eyes stay open, locked on hers until she closes them and leans back. Another moan vibrates her body, and I feel it deep inside me.
Lainey is submitting to me.
She wants this relationship to work as much as I do.
This time, she takes our kiss to another level. A level I never thought possible. I’m making love to her with only my mouth—lips, teeth, and tongue.
“Lainey, baby … oh, you feel so good.” I groan.
Wild with desire, I need to have more of her. Dropping my head, I suck her nipple into my mouth. She arches toward me, and I cup the soft globe and caress her smooth skin.
“Let me touch you Brendan … please?” Lainey begs.
I circle my tongue around her other hard peak, kissing the puckered skin of her areola. The handcuffs clang when she pulls against them, and her previous request breaks through the thrall she has me under.
“What?” I ask, looking up at her and searching her face for signs of deception.
“I want to try this your way. No fighting. No pain. A fresh start.” She looks me dead in the eye, and I find truth in the bright-blue depths that plead for me to release her. It’s not enough to kill my doubts. I need to hear her say it.
“You’re playing games, aren’t you?”
She pauses, frowning as she drops my gaze.
Anger tries to overcome me. I should have known. It’s never this easy with her.
“No. No, I’m not. I know we’re going to do this whether I want to or not, so I want to try it without fighting. We’ve never done it without pain and anger. I want a fresh start. I know I can’t go anywhere, so what do you have to lose by letting me try?”
Her wide eyes and heaving chest corroborate her statements.
I devour her breasts with hungry eyes and decide to give her a shot at redeeming herself. Having her touch me without force. Enjoying her willing participation. Feeling her heart race against mine from pleasure instead of fear. It’s a dream come true.
It’s a big risk, but it’s not insurmountable. If she’s being deceitful, I will slap the handcuffs back on her and take out my frustrations on her body, whether she’s willing or not.
A more than fitting punishment is she’s teasing me.
“Baby, you have no idea how happy this makes me.” I grin at her and retrieve the key to the handcuffs from the top drawer of the bedside table.
Uncuffing her, I lock one side of the cuffs to the bed frame and toss the key over my shoulder onto the floor. It’s a foolhardy move, however I can feel deep in my gut that this is the breakthrough we needed. I hope I never have to restrain her in anger again.
I pull her upright, sitting her between my legs.
“Kiss me. Touch me,” I command.
She draws in a deep breath, a shy smile flitting at the edges of her lips. Lainey leans forward and presses her lips to mine. Victory surges through me. I have won. She is willingly to be mine.
With one hand at the back of her head and the other on her waist, I kiss her hard. She responds immediately, grasping my biceps and testing my skin with her nails. I shiver, the lick of pain sending ecstasy bubbling through my veins.
Lainey explores my body. Her hands roam over the hard planes of my abdomen and she nibbles the cords in my neck. Her fingers graze the head of my cock, then she makes me almost jump out of my skin by wrapping both hands around my length.
“Fuck,” I groan when she works me up and down.
I swell in her hands, the sensations overwhelming. One wrong move and she’ll send me over the edge. Gritting my teeth, I tamp down on my impending release and try to enjoy her touch. It’s hard to manage. She’s everywhere. I can feel her, smell her, taste her, hear her shallow breathing.
Madelaine O’Brien is consuming me.
“Turn around, Brendan. Lean against the bed for me. Get comfortable and let me give you pleasure this time,” she whispers against my lips.
Cupping my balls, she kisses me before she pulls away.
&nb
sp; My mind is clouded. I don’t know how I feel about her taking control. That’s usually my job.
“It’s okay,” Lainey apologises with a tiny shrug. “Stupid idea. You probably hate what I’m doing anyway.”
Now, I just feel guilty.
“No, Lainey. I love it.” I shuffle us around and sit in almost the exact position she was in before I took off the handcuffs.
“Thank you,” she says, moving her body in between my legs.
Hooking her legs over mine, she exposes her glistening pussy to me. It’s a beautiful sight—Lainey spread willingly in front of me. I stroke her clit, and she throws her head back and purrs.
“You like that, baby?”
Lainey nods, desire heating her face, turning her cheeks a delicious shade of pink.
I can’t contain my grin.
“My turn, Lainey baby.”
Leaning my head back, I let my dick stand tall. Lainey takes me in her hands and caresses my shaft. She licks my nipples and works my cock with confidence. My eyes flutter shuts and I push all thoughts from my head, concentrating solely on her touch as she brings me closer to the peak.
Lainey moves down my bottom, repositioning herself on her knees. I keep my eyes shut, fisting my hands at my sides when it dawns on my what she’s about to do. The last time I had my cock in her mouth, she bit me. Now, she’s sucking my length like it’s her favourite lollipop.
Un-fucking-believable.
When I thrust upward, wanting her to take every inch, she gags. I open my eyes and peer down at her.
“Too big for you, angel?”
With a nod, she wipes her mouth with the back of her hand and giggles.
“I’ll get used to it.”
Lainey bobs her head down my shaft, swirling her tongue around the head, flicking the sensitive notch. My hips buck, and I have to close my eyes to block out the sight of her slurping me like a pro, so I don’t prematurely end this.
Leaning back, I keep my hands off her. If I touch her, it will break her rhythm and that will interfere with the release that’s gathering around me like a storm.
“Oooooh Lainey, I’m gonna come.” he groans.
Like a good girl, she picks up the pace. My orgasm crests the rise, and I fall over into the abyss. Dark, delicious, and dirty. Lainey pulls hr mouth from my dick, but she keeps my orgasm going with her hand.
A loud snick breaks my trance. Then, Lainey is gone.
I try to jump to my feet, only to be pulled back to the mattress with a painful jerk when the handcuff bites into my skin and stops me from reaching her.
“WHAT THE FUCK? YOU BITCH!” I roar.
My cock is still hard, standing at attention, angry at being denied his release. I strain against the handcuffs, rage with flames the size of a wildfire burning within me when I accept that I’m stuck. The only thing that stops me from losing it completely is knowing that Lainey can’t leave the room. The window is secure, and she has to get past me to get to the door.
I’m stuck, but so is she.
“You might wanna finish that off. Can’t have you getting blue balls now, can we?” Lainey points at my dick.
She scoops the keys to the handcuffs off the floor where I tossed them and dangles them from her fingers. She giggles, sounding like a kid in a candy store.
“You’re going to regret this when I get hold of you, my dumb slut. Enjoy your little power play while it lasts. There's no way for you to leave.”
Lainey ignores me. She’s too busy taking off the jewelry I gave her and putting her other crap back on. Picking up the clothes I stripped off her, she throws them back on the floor when she finds that they’re too tattered to wear.
Opening the drawers in the dresser, she begins rifling through my things. I don’t know what she’s looking for until she emerges holding a wooden rectangular case, the sight if which steals every ounce of air from my lungs. She opens it and smiles.
“Well, looky here….” Lainey drawls.
She lifts the handgun from its case and expertly inserts the magazine. Pulling a pair of shorts and a T-shirt out of my drawers, she covers her traitorous body, then points the gun at me.
There’s a crooked smile on her face when she speaks, mocking me with my own words. “Oh, don’t be scared. I’ll only hurt you if you don’t promise to leave me alone once I leave here. If you promise to leave me and everyone I love alone, I won’t have to hurt you.” I mimic the stupid demands he used to make of me.
I let her taunts wash over me without reacting. Rather than give her my anger, I shower her with scorn.
“Why would I do that, now that I know how well you can suck cock?” Her throat works when she swallows, and I continue to drive my barbs home. “How are you going to explain the taste of my cock in your mouth to your biker scum? I should remind him about all the good times we had before he got my sloppy seconds. I should tell him how you used to scream with pleasure and cry with ecstasy. How you would let me do whatever I wanted to you. Do you think he’ll want you then? I bet you told him I forced you every time … we both know that’s not the truth, don’t we, Lainey? Sometimes you’d beg me to take you.”
Leaning back against the bed frame, I cross my legs and watch my words pierce her heart. I’m working my way under her defences, before long she’ll have uncuffed me and I’ll have her over my knee.
I wait, watching a dozen emotions cross her face, her expression morphing from one to the other until she settles on anger.
Good. Angry people make mistakes. I’ll be free shortly if she doesn’t get herself under control. A shit-eating grin lifts my lips and I tilt my head like I’m actually interested in what she has to say.
I’m not.
She’s gone too far this time.
“Brendan, darling.” She sounds like sugar wouldn’t melt in her mouth. “How have you not worked out, after all this time, that you had his sloppy seconds?”
There isn’t time to absorb the meaning of her words before she points the gun at me and shoots me in the thigh. I scream, red hot, burning embers peeling my skin as pain blooms from my thigh and radiates through my entire body.
“You see,” Lainey continues, barely skipping a beat despite my vocal agony. “You never had the privilege of being my first, no matter what you tell yourself.”
Knotting the top part of the bedspread around my leg, I attempt to stem the blood flow. Lainey stops talking, watching me through eyes that shine with worry, until she visibly shakes herself and holds the handgun higher.
“Mik and I made love when we disappeared during my birthday party. He was my first, and he would’ve been my only, if you hadn’t raped me. Let me tell you, though, I thought about him every single time you were inside me. I only let you touch me because you threatened my family. I never loved you. If I'm honest, I didn't even like you all that much.”
My heart shatters into a million pieces. I believed her that night when she said nothing happened.
Have I been in love with a manipulating whore this whole time?
Pushing away my misery, I paint derision on my face and lash out at her with a sneer in my voice.
“I always knew you were a slut, Lainey. I also knew I could do better than you. What’s your point?”
She blanches at my insult, then her anger morphs into rage. Lifting the gun higher, she pulls aims at my shoulder and pulls the trigger. I shout, stopping suddenly when the pain I expected doesn’t eventuate.
The bullet has lodged in the wall to the right of me.
“Don’t stress, one bullet wound is enough for me. I don’t want you to bleed out on me. Mik and my dad will enjoy having a chat with you when I let them know where I am. Have to make sure you’re in good health for that.” Lainey winks at me. “As for the taste of your cock in my mouth, giving Mik a quick blow-job will erase any lingering aftertaste. I mean, he is the one who taught me how to suck cock so well.”
Desolation consumes my soul. She knows exactly where to hit me to make it hurt the most. I loo
k at her, my eyes bulging with agonised rage, and I realise that I never truly knew her.
Maddi or Lainey. She’s a stranger to me.
“Anyhow, enough chitchat,” Lainey says with humour in her tone.
She twirls the gun around her trigger finger and begins to examine the room. Apparently unwilling to get too close to me, she pays the most attention to the window. I relax back against the cold iron and try to ignore my throbbing leg. She can’t go anywhere. The window is alarmed, and the shutter is operated by a switch that’s sits in the wall to my right. Safe in my knowledge that she can’t escape, I’m content to watch her while I plot my way out of this. Now I see her for who she really is, this is no longer a matter of the heart for me.
It’s payback. Plain and simple. Sweet, sweet revenge of the best kind.
I get to hurt her while I fuck her, and I don’t have to feel bad about it anymore.
A weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I am absolved of my guilt. I didn’t hurt an innocent girl, I battled a demon masquerading as an angel—and we both felt the bloody consequences.
The house falls quiet, the electronic buzz that we’re never conscious of until it’s gone has disappeared.
The power has gone out—by accident or by design? I don’t know.
What I do know is that this is over if Lainey works out that she can open the window now.
She doesn’t even have to look. The shutter begins to lift on its own, proving conclusively that there is an outside force behind the power outage.
I groan. A headache that beats in time with my throbbing leg spreads across my forehead, gripping my temples like a vice.
It’s over.
I’ve lost.
“Don’t go anywhere, darling. I’ll be right back for you.” Lainey grins and climbs through the window.
Without a word, I watch her leave.
There’s nothing I can do now but wait.
My safe house has been breached.
I can already feel Mik Kennedy breathing against the back of my neck as he hunts me down to take his revenge.
THIRTY-TWO
Craving Control (Black Shamrocks MC Book 6) Page 28
