by C. M. Albert
Brighton
LIV WOULDN’T STOP rambling about what she thought was best for me. So, I did the one thing I knew would get her to shut up. I dropped my mouth to hers and feasted on the delicious taste of her full lips. I swiped my tongue along her mouth, parting it for the first time since we’d been alone together. I hadn’t dared allow myself to touch her like this since then. To cave. To crave. To lose myself all over again.
A moan swelled from deep inside Olivia, and it only made me want to taste her more. I pulled her to a stand and deepened the kiss. Her hands went to my chest as she finally kissed me back with equal passion and longing.
Then, just as abruptly, she pulled away. She turned to Ryan, mortified at what she’d just done. “Ryan—I didn’t mean to—”
“Liv, it’s okay,” he said, standing too.
“It is?”
She looked back and forth between us. What she didn’t realize was that he’d given me tacit permission in that one simple look that passed between us. Just as easily as Liv and I were able to communicate on a deeper level with our eyes, so were me and Ryan. We just seemed to know what the other was thinking. Maybe that’s why it worked so easily with the three of us in the bedroom. Or maybe it was because of our time there. But the two of us had gotten used to communicating silently for Olivia’s benefit. And we’d gotten exceptionally good at it.
Ryan turned her face toward him, and I could see the years of love and devotion as he stared deep into her eyes. “I don’t know what this means, or where we go from here. But you said yourself you wished this never ended. Kerrington told me he’s still in love with you—”
Liv glanced quickly at me and I nodded. “He knows.”
She bit her lower lip, tears forming.
“I will never stop loving you, Olivia. What we do with all this, I have no clue. We can figure all that out tomorrow,” I said.
“What about tonight? I thought we were laying everything out on the table and clearing the air.”
“Sometimes, you get to a point where words are no longer necessary,” Ryan said, glancing up at me. He leaned forward and gently swiped his tongue over Olivia’s full, swollen lips. “Wouldn’t you agree, Kerrington?”
I finally dropped my hands to Olivia’s hips as I’d wanted to all night and tugged her closer. I loved the way her breath hitched when she realized what was happening. That we were both ready to love her again, openly, with no road map. With just the promise to explore, and to continue healing. All of us. Together.
“Words are overrated,” I growled in her ear. While Ryan dominated her mouth, causing Olivia to moan into his kiss, I dropped my mouth to her neck. She leaned into my embrace, her hand searching for mine at her side.
“This one thing needs to be said first.” The little flutter in Olivia’s throat made me want to hurry. “I’m willing to sacrifice anything to be here with you. I told Ryan once that I’d bail if my heart ever got invested. That I wouldn’t risk my own pain to heal yours.”
She groaned, pressing her head back against my chest as I kissed along her collarbone, my fingers gently tracing the flutter.
“I was wrong. I didn’t know it then, but I do now. I would give anything,” I said, pulling her hips even closer. “I love you, Olivia. As long as your heart is open, and Ryan is willing, I’m not ready to leave you yet. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready.”
I kissed the tears from Olivia’s cheeks and lifted her into my arms. I glanced over at Ryan, understanding and need pulsing between us. “Where do we go from here?”
“Let’s start with our room,” he said, leading the way.
That night, Ryan and Olivia physically and emotionally opened their literal marriage bed to me for the first time. Only now, it wasn’t to heal like it was before. And it wasn’t just for the sexual release, either. There was a silent understanding that whatever we were creating from this point forward, it was born and forged in love.
Between the three of us.
I WOKE TO Olivia’s hand sliding under the covers and caressing my thigh. I buried my face in her hair, not wanting to leave our happy, little cocoon. Sunshine outlined the curtains in their master bedroom, letting me know we’d slept in later than normal.
“Good morning,” she whispered, not wanting to wake Ryan.
I ran my finger down the center of her face to her bottom lip. I couldn’t believe how quickly things had changed and that I finally had her in my arms again. Especially after the way things ended. She drew my finger into her mouth, never breaking eye contact. I groaned, pulling her closer to my warm body. A bed got toasty with three people sleeping in it.
“Are you two at it again?” Ryan groaned from the other side of the bed. “I can’t keep up with you crazy kids.”
I burst out laughing, but it died on my lips when Olivia’s hand wrapped around me, playfully waking me all the way up.
“Come on, old man. It’s been what?” I checked the bedside clock. “Four hours since we fell asleep?”
Ryan chuckled. “Old man, my ass,” he said, his hand wrapping around Olivia’s waist as he kissed her good morning. “I could get used to this.”
“But what would the neighbors think?” I teased.
“Well, technically, you’re still our only neighbor. So, I think they’d be okay with it. In fact, I think that arrangement would work out rather well, don’t you?”
Olivia’s hand stilled, and I pulled back to look over her shoulder at Ryan. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying shut up and give my wife the proper good morning kiss she deserves. Then I’m saying, let’s get some pancakes together. Then I’m saying, let’s maybe figure out our day and take it one step at a time. How does that sound?”
Olivia purred in response, her hand continuing to say good morning in the most delicious and intimate way. I groaned as I pressed into her touch, and Ryan chuckled, pulling Olivia’s hair aside to brush his lips along her shoulders. Then he disappeared under the covers, and all thoughts about what he was or wasn’t saying didn’t seem to matter as much anymore. The three of us tangled fluidly, effortlessly. It was unspoken, and not understood by my simple mind. But it worked. And it worked well. In fact, we were lucky Olivia’s therapy appointment wasn’t until three because we missed breakfast completely, skipping right to brunch.
Olivia made her famous pancakes, and they were worth the wait. It was unsettling, but also comfortable, sitting at their breakfast table once again. Especially without all the tension this time around. I just hoped it would last. I tried not to worry too much about a label, but to be grateful that I was with the people I loved the most—which was more than I could say at this time yesterday. Even though I had no idea what our future held, I was happy.
“You look like you have an awful lot racing through that cute head of yours,” Olivia teased. Ryan was cleaning up the dishes since Olivia made breakfast, and he insisted he had it covered.
“Sorry. I can’t help but be a little shell-shocked that Ryan is okay with all this again. Don’t get me wrong, I’m here for it. I just hope he doesn’t regret it later. And I have no clue what any of this means long term.”
“I don’t think any of us do,” she said earnestly. “But I’m willing to find out. Are you?”
I glanced over at Ryan, who was loading the dishwasher. The fact that the three of us were a picture of domestic bliss this morning after a raucous night of lovemaking didn’t escape me. I chuckled. “I don’t want to wake up and find out this was all just a dream. I don’t want to lose this again.”
“Let’s not worry about losing it before it’s even really begun, okay? I’ll talk to my therapist about everything today. See what he thinks.”
I gaped at her. “You’re going to tell Dr. Paul about us?”
“He already knows. I can’t very well heal if I’m being dishonest now, can I?”
She said it lightheartedly, but I knew how hard it must be to open herself up to him. Especially since she was so against it at firs
t.
I took her hand in mine. “I’m really proud of you, Liv. Do you know that?”
A huge grin lit up her face, and I couldn’t help but reciprocate. “So, one day at a time. What does today hold?” I asked Ryan.
He came over to the table, a dishtowel slung over his shoulder. He put his hand on the back of Olivia’s chair. “Well, I gotta drop Liv off at three. I was going to jog while she was at her appointment since it’s near the lake. I decided I’m gonna run another half marathon next spring, so I’ve got to start logging the miles every chance I can get. Wanna come?”
I had a million things to do now that I’d asked Paige to take the house off the market. I had already planned to take some time off from work, so staying a few extra months wouldn’t be detrimental there. I wouldn’t worry yet what came after that. I was really going to have to embrace this one-day-at-a-time shit.
“Sure. Let me go shower and grab some running clothes, and I’ll meet you back here in a few.”
I kissed the top of Liv’s head before heading home with a huge, shit-eating grin on my face. What could I say? I’d just spent the night with the woman of my dreams, and one of my best friends. It should have been weird, but it really wasn’t. Somehow, Ryan and I had broken through the macho bullshit and laid it all on the table. That’s when I realized I didn’t want to lose him just as much as I didn’t want to lose her. I didn’t know what that meant yet, but it was settling in my marrow, asking me to live with it for a while before figuring it all out.
One day at a time.
Yeah, I could get used to this setup.
Chapter Eleven
Ryan
OLIVIA WAS AT her appointment with Dr. Paul, so Kerrington and I set off on a run around the lake and the university where I worked. I’d taken the day off for personal reasons, but it didn’t stop my students from calling out and saying hello as we jogged by. We settled into a nice, easy pace. The waves crashed hard against the stones that lined the shore. The water was rough today, which meant a storm was probably coming soon. Upstate New York didn’t care that it was only October.
“So, you sure you’re really okay with all this?” Brighton finally asked after three miles in. I knew it was on his mind all morning. It was on mine too.
“I’m not gonna act like this isn’t weird. I keep fluctuating between self-preservation and begging god to show me a sign to let me know if we’re doing the right thing. I honestly don’t know where any of this is headed, but it didn’t feel right to let you go either. I just don’t want to end up hurting you again. That’s my biggest concern.”
“Your biggest concern should be Olivia.”
“Shut the fuck up,” I said, laughing. “You know damn well she is. Don’t think just because you’re back in our bed that you’re moving up the food chain or anything. Liv is, and always will be, my number one priority.”
“I’m starting to feel like second fiddle,” Kerrington joked.
“Dude, I hate to break it to you, but you are.”
He bumped my shoulder then took off in a hard sprint. I increased my pace to catch up with him, but he was a lot faster than I expected and I damn near got winded. I slowed to a light jog and took some deep breaths. I couldn’t get a good lungful of air because of the cold snap coming in. I cursed under my breath, knowing I’d never hear the end of this from Kerrington.
As I slowed to a walk, my phone vibrated in my pocket. Since Liv was at her therapist and the only other person I cared about was smoking my ass running ahead of me, I let it go and didn’t pick up. I put my fingers to my pulse and measured my heart rate. When it returned to normal, I sprinted to catch up. I finally had Brighton in my line of sight when my phone vibrated again. I hollered for him to stop and yanked the phone from my pocket.
Brighton looped back and was about to make some wise-ass comment but then stopped when he saw my face.
“It’s Dr. Paul,” I mouthed silently.
“Is everything okay?” I asked Liv’s therapist. “What? When? The hospital?”
Dr. Paul explained what happened to Olivia and told us to meet him in the ER. I thanked him, then hung up.
“What is it?” Kerrington asked, his worry mirroring what I could only imagine was written on my face.
“It’s Olivia. We need to get to the hospital.”
IT WAS EASIER to run to the campus and ask a student for a lift than it was to get a cab, so that’s exactly what we did. It was a small town, and the hospital was close. But a car was still faster than Kerrington and I could run.
The undergrad dropped us off at the Emergency Room exit in record time and I ran in, trying to find someone in charge. Dr. Paul rounded the corner and rushed over.
“Tell me everything,” I said. “Christ, she was fine when we dropped her off.”
“Well, we were in the middle of our session, and everything seemed fine. But then she started looking a little pallid. I asked her if she was okay, but it was like she couldn’t fully hear me. I told her to put her head down between her knees and take a few deep breaths. She did, then sat back up and said she was fine, just embarrassed. The next thing I knew, she slumped right over and fell to the floor in a heap. I tried to revive her and rolled her to her side just in case. My receptionist got me a blanket to cover Olivia with while she was coming to.
“I gave her some water when she was finally ready to sit up. But she looked too weak to stand yet. I was worried her blood pressure dropped too fast, which can cause you to pass out. So, I insisted on calling an ambulance and getting her checked out.”
“Fuck,” I said in disbelief. She seemed fine last night and this morning. “Thanks for being there for her, Doc. And staying till we got here. You did the right thing.”
“Of course. She’s back with a doctor now. I’m sure they’ll come get you any moment,” he said.
Dr. Paul turned his attention to Brighton, and I knew in an instant that Olivia had used at least part of her session to update him on our status.
“So, you’re the infamous Brighton Kerrington,” he said.
“I’m not sure how to respond to that,” he admitted, laughing.
“My goal is to see Olivia be the healthiest she can be, in all areas of her life. It’s nice to finally put a name and face together for someone so important in her life.”
“In both our lives,” I said, glancing over at Kerrington. “Thanks so much for taking such good care of Liv for us today.”
“Of course,” he said, before shaking our hands and saying goodbye.
“Guess we wait,” Brighton said.
We found the waiting room and sat patiently. Eventually, a nurse came looking for Olivia’s family. “Is one of you Mr. Wells?”
“That’s me,” I said, standing. “Is Olivia doing okay?”
“She’ll be all right. She’s a little shaken from her ordeal but we’re giving her IV fluids to help get her back in shape.”
“Can I see her now?” I asked.
“Sure. You’ll have to wait here, though,” she told Brighton.
When I saw the crestfallen look on his face, I turned to the nurse. “He’s family. I’d like him to come back with me.”
She hesitated.
“Trust me. Olivia will want to see him, too. I’ll catch hell if she doesn’t.”
She nodded, then turned to lead us down the hall to the soft squishing noise of her blue Crocs.
When I finally saw her, my heart literally skipped a beat, causing my pulse to flutter erratically in my throat. It brought back the deep hopelessness I felt during Laelynn’s delivery and when Liv had been hit by a car over the summer while running. This was her second hospital visit in less than six months, and I didn’t like the trend.
Liv was now lying in an elevated bed with an IV hooked up to her arm. The astringent smell in the room burned my nose, and the steady beeps from all the monitors were disarming. The doctor standing at her bedside was talking too quietly to hear, and only when he moved did I notice the tears streami
ng down her cheeks. Was it worse than the nurse let on?
The doctor squeezed her shoulder before making room for us. “You’re in good hands now,” he said to Olivia, more jovially than I expected, considering the terrible shape she seemed to be in. “I’ll let your wife fill you in on what happened. If you have any questions about her post-visit care, a nurse will go over everything with you. She should be able to go home today after she’s had enough fluids. So long as she promises to eat more and take her medicine,” he said pointedly to Olivia.
She nodded, then reached out for me. I didn’t even hear the door close before I leaned over and wrapped my arms around her.
“What happened?” I asked, pulling back to get a better look at her. That’s when I realized she didn’t really look okay. There were dark circles under her eyes that I hadn’t noticed this morning. Had we kept her up too long last night? Pushed her too hard between the both of us? God. I was a monster.
“Stop!” she said, giving herself some wiggle room. “Take that look off your face. I know you think this is somehow your fault—and I suppose it is, but it really isn’t. Sit, and let me explain,” she said, patting the side of the hospital bed. “Both of you.”
We each took up residence, one on each side of Olivia. To hell with what the nurses thought if they walked in on us. Liv was our priority. “Tell us what happened.”
She squeezed my hand. “Well, you know I’ve lost some weight and haven’t really been feeling good recently, right? I just chalked it up to the stress I’ve been feeling lately, because this used to happen all the time in college, too.”
“See! It is my fault,” I grumbled, feeling awful.
Brighton smacked my arm. “Let her finish.”
I shot him the evil eye but nodded for Olivia to go on.
“The doctor said I’ve lost over ten pounds, which isn’t insignificant, considering my normal body weight. He said I’m anemic and need more Vitamin D. But there’s something else,” she said, twisting the hospital sheet in her hand.
